A/N: SORRY! I'm really sorry it took so long to update, for some reason fanfiction wouldn't let me upload any of my stuff? And then I got busy with midterms. Pretty sure I failed my
physics exam...but I can't help it, I'm obsessed with my story! :( Oh, and I'm sorry if it's 'choppy', I don't mean it to be that way! I tried to make less paragraph breaks and dialogue for this chapter to limit this.

Chapter 10

My eyes slowly opened, struggling to adjust against the harsh sunlight. The first thing I saw was Dean's face, incredibly soft and serene. He was still asleep, and I took the opportunity

to unabashedly soak in his gorgeousness. His soft lips were parted slightly, and his nose twitched a little as he breathed in deeply. I smiled widely, overwhelmed by his cuteness. It was

a treat, seeing him so peaceful. Usually his face would show nothing but concern, anguish, foreboding, or worse – the stone mask.

His arm rest against my waist; limp. Very gently I brought my hand there, enjoying the feel of his skin on mine. My eyes roamed his bare chest, relishing in the sweet glow of his skin. I

gaped, stopping as I saw the hand print that marked his right shoulder. It looked painful, like someone had put a hot iron to it. I briefly wondered what an angel looked like in its true

form, but from what Sam had told me that was impossible; your eyes would burn right out of their sockets. I thought of Castiel, wishing I could meet him; he had saved Dean, after all.

Hesitantly I brought my hand to it, almost scared that it would burn me. As my small fingers outlined his tortured flesh, I was surprised to find that it actually felt cooler than the rest of

his body. I pressed down harder; fascinated.

Suddenly Dean let out a sigh; I froze. After a few moments I was assured that Dean was still asleep, and willed my hand to continue. Calmly I let my fingers graze his collar bone,

delighting in every inch of bronze. The blood rushed to my face as I realized how intimate we were, and still I had the urge to bring him closer. I brought my hand up his neck and to his

face, slowly allowing my fingertips to graze his cheekbones. His jaw flexed slightly under my touch, making me want to touch him even more. Overcome by desire, I inched my face closer

to his.

Slowly...

I closed my eyes, my heart swelling with emotion.

Dean...

"Alice?"

My eyes shot open, Dean's green eyes stared back; confused.

I quickly withdrew my hand and rolled onto my back, averting my gaze to the ceiling. I felt my face get hotter and hotter until I thought I was going to die.

"I-I-" I stammered, "Sorry."

I tried to look at anything except him, the walls, the ceiling, the blankets...

I could feel him staring at me, his gaze burning a hole in my skull.

What was I doing?

"I think...I'm going to try to call Sam. See what he's up to..." Dean said. I nodded, closing my eyes tightly. A tension filled the room, seeping through the walls, dripping from the ceiling,

swallowing me whole. I felt him get off the bed, and my heart sank a little as he did so. I peeked from behind my eyelashes, watching as he put on a shirt and grabbed his cell phone

from the table. Once he left the motel room I let out an exasperated sigh.

"What the hell were you thinking?" I thought, bringing my hands to my hot face.

Why had I tried to kiss him? What did this mean? Did I like Dean?

I startled at my self-realization. My eyes widened, my mouth parting slightly.

"Oh my God." I thought, "I like Dean."

How, amongst all of this chaos, torture and death, had I managed to let myself fall for Dean?

Of course the way one side of his mouth would raise when he smiled was kind of cute..., and he was pretty adorable when he growled when he was mad or concerned...

But Dean was such a major risk! All of his life he had fought all of the evil things in the world, and on top of that the loss he had experienced in his life was staggering. There was no

doubt that he had a dark side, and I wasn't sure how dark that side was...

Plus, he flirted with anything on two legs. He called complete strangers "sweet-heart" and "doll", excluding me. He had never called me any of those pet names...

That was it; Dean didn't like me at all. He thought of me just as a friend, or worse- a sister.

"Great Alice, just great. Do you always have to be the victim of one sided love?"

I squealed in frustration.

"Alice, Hayley is in trouble. Stop letting your non-existent love life distract you." I thought, and with that I shut up.

Just then, Dean came back into the room. I sat up, forcing myself to look into his eyes. He appeared troubled, setting his phone back on the table. He shrugged his shoulders, trying to

be nonchalant, yet failing terribly.

"No answer. No calls."

***

Dean and I went the whole day barely speaking a word to each other. In a way I was grateful, and on the other hand it was torture. Dean loafed around the motel room, finding ways

to busy his hands. He spent the entire morning working on his car, and then once it got dark he came back in, sat on his bed, and sorted through his guns; cleaning and reloading them.

As he did this I sat on my own bed with my legs to my chest. I was pretending to watch the television, unsure of what to say to Dean. He was obviously worried about his brother, who

hadn't yet called. I wanted to assure him that things would be okay, yet I was worried too. I knew how he felt; knowing that a loved one was in trouble and yet you couldn't do

anything about it. I too felt worthless; just sitting here watching I Love Lucy re-runs until my eyes glazed over. In fact, I'm sure both Dean and I would agree that we'd rather be with

Sam and Ruby, (well, maybe not Ruby), fighting.

I discreetly peered over at him. He was still entranced in his work, yet I got the feeling he was a little too focused. A gnawing at my stomach told me he was avoiding me; breaking my

wall of ignorance. I had somehow managed to fool myself into thinking that maybe, just maybe, he had either forgotten about the incident from the morning or hadn't even noticed it at

all. Of course it made sense that he felt awkward around me now, how else would someone react to a situation like ours?

If only he wasn't so nice to me, then maybe I wouldn't have liked him in the first place. When Dean showed affection it was like witnessing a miracle. This made it all the more difficult to

resist him because every touch, every smile and every stare made you feel special.

Dean was a very complicated person. At first glance, he was simply sex on legs. Everything about him lured you in; his cute smile, his rough voice, and especially his fiery gaze. He was a

bad boy; rough around the edges and cloaked by mystery. Any one of these things would make a woman's chest tingle and heart swell. Girls craved to break down that stony exterior

and discover the softness and vulnerability within. Deep down, Dean was just a boy who wanted the simple things in life; friends, family, love...

But what they didn't know was that behind the stone mask, something else was also waiting to be discovered. When Dean confessed to me about his ordeal in hell and how he had

'taken up the torture', I had caught a glimpse of it. In actuality, Dean was more wounded and troubled than anyone I had ever known. He was tortured by his past, forever unforgiving

of his actions. There was a darkness within him, a small little monster that tore at his insides and brought him deeper and deeper into the night.

"Dean?" I called. He woke out of his trance, looking at me for what seemed like the first time in ages.

"Yes?" he answered, his face somewhat distant; cautious.

"What do we do if he doesn't call?" I asked, trying to hide the concern in my voice. Dean sighed, returning to his guns.

"I don't know." He said, sounding almost defeated. I averted my gaze back to the T.V.; thinking. After a moment I interrupted Dean again.

"Dean?"

He looked back up.

"I think that...if he doesn't call or answer his phone by tomorrow, we should go after him and check things out."

Dean just stared, contemplating my proposition before he answered.

"Okay."

***

When morning came and there was still no phone call, I insisted that we leave. At first Dean was hesitant; he had a lot of faith in his brother.

"Dean, something could have gone wrong. I don't want to just sit here and wait."

Dean had nodded his head numbly; silent. I knew that he was struggling to not fear the worst. We packed, Dean reluctantly and I hastily. By noon we were on the road, the motel

fading away behind us.

The air was dead and thick; weighing down my lungs as dread and apprehension settled itself in my stomach. Dean drove fast, his eyes never leaving the road. Looking at him made me

anxious so I soaked in the passing scenery instead. I rest my head against the window, relishing in its coolness and watching as the shadowed trees blended together, one silk sheet

of viridian. The sky was cloudless and yet there were no signs of life; birds, planes; just absence. I could hear nothing but the sound of my beating heart.

My eyelids began to feel heavy, willing me to close them. I struggled against the fatigue, wanting, needing to remain conscious. Dean. Dean...

"Dean, you have to do it."

My nostrils stung, the overwhelming smell of tree rot and mud filling them. There was something else too...blood. It was dark and dank, thick and musky. There was little oxygen, slowly

suffocating me; I wanted to choke. Dean was in front of me, his eyes furious and rebellious; fighting against something within him. He shook his head violently at my words, his eyes beginning

to water. I wanted to kiss away those tears.

"Dean, you remember what Cas said! Please..." I begged.

His shoulders sunk, defeated. He began to weep. It killed me to see him this way, but there was nothing I could do; it was the only way. I took his hands in mine, the knife within them smiled;

gleeful. I willed him to look at me.

He cried. "Alice...Alice..." he moaned in devastation, shaking his head back and forth slowly. I tightened the blade in his hand, securing it. It shone as if on fire, promising blind, piercing pain. My

fingers laced within Dean's, urging, pleading. He had to do it before I had time to change my mind. I brought my body closer to his, the crux of the blade digging into my flesh. I let my forehead

rest against Dean's, closing my eyes and breathing him in. He was feverish; hot. I gently kissed his lips, wishing beyond anything else that I could make it easier for him. Why did it have to be

this way?

"Alice...Alice..."

"Alice?"

I jerked awake, slight horror still masking my face. It was eerily dark, and I thrust my hands out to steady myself. They met a cold surface; a dashboard. I was still in Dean's Impala.

"Are you alright?" Dean asked. I looked over to him, relieved to see he wasn't crying. My dream was still fresh in my head, blurring into reality. The horrid smell of decay was still

imprinted in my memory, continuing to scar my lungs. Dean looked anxious; concerned. His words slowly registered in my head, I nodded.

"It's nothing, just a nightmare."

Dean frowned. He was just too familiar with nightmares. He lived one for forty years didn't he? Slowly he brought a hand to my arm, trying to reassure me. He smiled a little, and it

warmed my stomach. The awkwardness of the morning was gone, perhaps even forgotten. I smiled back, slightly relieved. I breathed in slowly, taking in my surroundings. We had

stopped driving; I could hear the sound of the engine cooling. My eyes still struggled to adjust in the darkness, yet as I saw familiar trees and houses, I knew where we were.

"We're here." I said, bluntly. "That was quick."Dean grunted.

"You slept the entire time." He said, curiosity still lingering in his eyes. I shrugged my shoulders nonchalantly, not wanting to go into details of my dream. I hated my dreams, they were

always so real, the smells, the emotions, the pain.

Past Dean I could see the outline of a two story house- Hayley's. There were no lights on; it instead just sat there basking in the shadows. Its front door was framed by two medium

sized bushes; its leaves were a ravishing green, heavily contrasting the white paint job Hayley's father had done the summer before.

Dean's door opened; he was getting out. I looked at him, apprehension plastered over my face. He frowned slightly.

"Come on, Ally. We've got to check it out."

I reluctantly followed him, sliding over the seat and taking his hand as he lent it. He pulled me up, his grip firm and strong; a man's. My heart sped up a bit, and I kicked myself mentally

at the thought.

We walked up to the house, each step feeling like a mile. "Please," I thought, "please let Hayley be okay." The front door, honey stained pine, came closer and closer. I tried not to let my

imagination run wild, yet couldn't help remembering the torn and decaying bodies from the gas station. I shut my eyes, absently grabbing at Dean's coat sleeve. He didn't look it, but I

knew he was dreading it too. What if Lilith got her? What would we find within these walls?

Before I knew it we were in front of the door. I looked at Dean, not sure of what to do. I watched as he put his ear to the door, listening.

"I can't hear anything." He said. "Maybe they're sleeping?"

Yeah, or maybe they're dead.

A ghostly whistle of wind broke the silence, making the situation more eerie. My stomach lurched, my face heating up. Slowly I brought my right hand up to the door, formed a fist, and

then tapped briskly on the hard wood. A few moments passed; there was nothing. I brought my hand up again, ready to knock a second time, but before I could a light went on from

the living room. I gasped. My heart filled with relief, and then just as quickly filled with worry.

I looked at Dean.

"Wait, what am I going to say?" I asked. Dean looked just as shocked as I was; perhaps we had both expected the worst more than we should have. He shrugged his shoulders, and I

groaned, beginning to panic. My hands shook, and I darted my head around anxious to find a solution. An idea came to mind.

"Hide!" I whispered harshly at Dean. I could hear steps coming from inside the house, getting louder as they came to the front door.

"What?" He asked, dumbfounded.

"How am I supposed to explain you, let alone my mysterious disappearance?" I spat, becoming more and more flustered. Dean looked around expectantly, but I could hear the front

door begin to open; in the corner of my eye I saw the knob turn. I spun around to Dean, and with one fluid motion, pushed him into the bushes. He stumbled backwards, disappearing

into the emerald green leaves. I quickly turned to face the door, straightening myself out. White light blinded me for a moment, and then the slender petite figure of Hayley came to

vision. She was rubbing her eyes, half asleep. Once she opened them, her jaw dropped. I couldn't help but smile, I had missed her so much.

"Ally Bear?" she asked incredulously, taking a step forward. I stood still, almost numb. She wasn't hurt, she wasn't dead, she was here. Before I knew it she enveloped me in a huge

hug, squeezing the air from my lungs. She let out a mixture of laughs and sobs, her tears trailing down my neck.

"I thought you were dead! Where were you? Why didn't you call? My parents and I even made flyers!" She rambled. I let my arms wrap around her, overwhelmed with relief, happiness,

and nervousness.

"I-I- uh..." I started, not really sure what to say.

Just then the bushes began to move, and a sputtering could be heard.

Damnit Dean!

Hayley jumped away, almost letting out a scream as Dean emerged from the bushes. I touched her arm lightly, glaring evilly at Dean as he patted off dirt from his pants. He gave me a

look of equal annoyance.

"It's a rapist, Alice! Run inside!"

"Hey-" Dean started, his hands raised in front of him in innocence. Hayley moved towards him, her fists raising as if trying to protect me."Oh no." I thought.

"Hayley! No...he's with me!" I said with urgency. She looked to me, questioning.

"Who is he?" she asked.

My brain scattered, I couldn't think. Shit, shit, shit.

"Uh...he's my..." I started, trying to think of something, anything. Hayley's eyes burrowed into mine, searching and prodding.

"He's my fiancé."


Hmm... just wondering, what are your opinions on Ruby (in general)?