Alright, I know. It's been two weeks and that's inexcusable. I did not mean to, I assure you, but some other stories needed updated as well, I got grounded for a few days, and THEN I realized that this chapter was TOO friggin' long. I know, I should have noticed that when I originally made the story's layout but I just would not feel comfortable with continuing through and making this chapter as long as I had originally intended. It would be... egh, bulky. I want at least a small amount of consistency in my chapters, so I hope you'll all forgive me and stay tuned for both this chapter AND the final which shouldn't take too long to write.

Once again, thank you SO much for the support, everyone. You really don't have any idea how much that means to me. Thank you very much! I would especially like to thank my lovely Betas for this chapter, Effar and Willowfly. Thanks so much!

TMNT, Leonardo, Raphael, Michelangelo, Donatello, Splinter, and the Foot © Mirage Studios
story © Turtlefreak121

Paradigm
Chapter Ten: Long Awaited Reunion

Before my vision could even think of coming back, I recall hearing the echo of splashes, running, and the panting of labored breath right against my head. I was scared, I didn't know if I was alive, in Heaven, in Hell.

Then feeling came back and I was for certain that it was Hell. In all my years of battling as a ninja, I had never felt so much pain. It was one thing to be aching, bruised, and cut up, but this felt as though my every single nerve had been lit on fire. I suddenly wanted nothing more than to never feel, whether it be good or bad, ever again if only to rid myself of this burning.

Muffled noises came from above my head but the blistering, tearing pain was too much for me to concentrate on anything else.

A cold splash of water pelted my feet and I was returned to reality for a short time. I realized that there were other senses that I had been ignoring. I felt securely held against my brother's hard plastron, the tight, shaking embrace of his arms around my shell, or the tears and blood falling upon my chest that were not my own.

At last, I could truly hear.

"Stay with me, Mikey. Stay with me!"

I felt jarred and opened my eyes to a blurry existence, realizing that we had stumbled. I looked about in this hazy world and saw my brother's exhausted, war torn face. He looked like death warmed over and he was crying something awful - over me.

"You can't leave me, Mikey! God, please! Mikey!"

Poor Leonardo.

I wanted so bad to look him in the face, to laugh off my own ache, and assure him that everything would be okay, things always were. When I tried, though, I couldn't. The words did not form, my body didn't move...

I felt as though I was trapped in stone.

As my eyes began to close against my will, Leonardo looked down at my face to see that I was awake. His expression teetered between horror and joy.

"Mikey!" he shouted hopefully, until my eyes closed yet again into a void of nothingness, of numbness. "MIKEY!"

It seems like it had taken a lifetime on this voyage of ours. A few hours once I added up all the stops and detours we had made in Casey and April's initial bickering. It's finally over, though.

I'm finally at the farm.

As I straighten up in the backseat and look around at the oh, so familiar landscape of our home away from home, I feel like I'm about to be sick. I know Leo's here, I know I owe him so much and I will never be able to thank him.

He dragged me out of that battle when I should have been left for dead... and that was not enough.

He did so much more after that...

The car is slowing and I really am about to vomit. I want to call Don! I want to go home! I want him here with me! I don't want to see Leo! I don't want to face the truth! I don't want to see what has happened because of me!

And yet... the car stops, waiting expectantly for me to get out of it.

I can't move for a few seconds. How could I? I never realized that it would actually get harder the closer I got! I didn't realize that Master had been wrong, that I'm not feeling better at all.

"Mikey?" April's sweet voice comes from the front seat, jarring me, waking me back up to the world of the living.

"Dude, you okay?" Casey adds.

Blinking a few times, I turn and look at them. Both of them have craned themselves backward to look at me. I almost wish they would stop existing all together if they can't look at me any other way. Why is everyone so sympathetic toward me? Why do I deserve it?

I'm not helping matters, though, I guess. I look into the rear view mirror and realize that I'm crying like a baby.

Oh, if Raph or Don could see me right now... I don't even want to think about it.

"Maybe... we should just go back," April whispers.

I feel shocked. Go back? To New York? To the Lair? Without Leo?

No, I can't be home without him anymore. I simply can't. It's not home without Leo. I have to bring him back! I have to apologize! I have to make things right again because they have been wrong for way too long!

I'm tired of Master Splinter's exhaustion, Raphael's anger, Donatello's sadness. I can't stand the stilled atmosphere — I can't, I just can't.

You can't understand what it feels like to be dead when you're still living.

"No!" I snap back. I'm in use of my body again, I can't stop now.

Neither of them are looking all that convinced by my performance. In fact, April seems even more saddened by it. They know about as much as I do in the situation, and that isn't much.

"Then let us go with you, Mike," Casey suggests sympathetically.

"I'd rather you didn't," I say sharply in turn. "I need to see him... by myself."

They sigh and nod in remorse. They understand.

I open the door and take in a breath of the fresh air. It's crisp, tinged with the autumn breeze but not dead yet, still clinging to the lively summer air. The farm is just as Leo always said it was, completely timeless, each season merely reflecting the others.

Stepping out, I walk forward and start toward the grassy plains of the barnyard. The grass is hardened despite being a deceitful green.

In the back of my mind I'm hoping Leo's far from the barn, that I won't have to see him just yet. Perhaps I could even sit around and take more time to go over my apology speech or prepare a joke for the occasion.

But I see him already. I see his bandana, torn from that night and stitched up like my Frankenstein wounds.

It's just like Don told me.

I make my way to him and feel my entire body quiver. My eyes are next to useless to see out of, they're filled to the brim with tears. So I fall to my knees, to his feet and just cry.

My speech, my jokes, they're all gone. All I can see is that mask.

"I'm so sorry..." I sob. "I'm so sorry..."

It's not supposed to be this way...

The next thing I remember was waking up faintly and realizing that my vision was skewed by a crimson liquid. I had no clue where it came from but I knew my head was throbbing something awful.

Next I saw my brother's blood splattered chest and realized that I was curled up in Leo's lap. He was mothering me so delicately that I almost cried at the mere earnestness of his actions.

His soft humming was urging me awake yet lulling me to sleep all at the same time, and his gentle massaging of my shell continued the trend of confusion.

I could feel that clouded shroud of darkness covering my eyes again, but I had to fight it no matter what. I could not risk to be lost from these feelings again because I feared I would never feel them again. A strange numbness had come to my wounds...

Still, something did not feel right... like I had been missing a part of myself.

I felt a warm hand against my cheek and I looked lazily to my brother's blurry face.

"Hey, Mikey," Leo choked out. "You-you're okay... You know that, right? You're okay?"

I blinked. I was too tired...

He frowned and continued working on my head. I supposed that this was what he had been maneuvering before. I felt assured... and horrified. There was something wrong with my head? Why couldn't I feel it?

Why was it making me so tired?

"You'll be just fine..." Leo croaked, I could see clearly enough to realize he was trembling. He was covered in so much blood. I may have been injured but I knew that in order to have bled that much on him by myself would have killed me. "Yeah, Mike... Don and Raph are on their way... I called them."

I relaxed and took in more of the moment. We were in the sewers, hidden, safe.

"H-home?" I gasped. My head couldn't move without this awful pain, not even for speaking.

"Shh." Leo coaxed me out of my terrible ache, drawing me closer. "There, used your mask... you'll be fine. " He tucked his arms under my shell and I wanted nothing more than to curl up against him and forget this entire night, wish it had never happened, wake up from it. "We're not home."

The news was heartbreaking. I wanted to be home with Sensei and Don and Raph... I didn't like being out here, even in the sewers. It wasn't safe, not completely.

"I couldn't let them track us to the Lair," Leo sighed as he brushed his thumb against my face. "I... I couldn't make it that far, anyway. "

I stared at him.

What the hell did that even mean?

He saw my concern and brought forth a grin, wild and youthful, like when we were at the movies. "You... remember the movie?" he questioned wistfully, needing this for some reason, needing it more than me.

Of course I did. I nodded the best I could. Damn my head hurt.

He drew me closer to his chest and I felt all my fear melt away. I knew I was with him and he was with me. Brothers, standing by each other no matter what, never leaving each other behind... Loving each other more than we loved ourselves.

His humming came to my ears like a sweet release, like the world was sweet and whole again even in this damp, barren hole. I could hear his heart racing in his chest, thundering like a wild herd against my ear.

I wondered what was going on to cause such mounting fear in my brother... Was it really only worry for me?

He began to sob as he lowered his head, "If you're blue and you don't know where to go to, why don't you go where fashion sits" I looked at him, recognizing the lyrics.

I snorted some and closed my eyes. He was such a terrible singer... "Puttin' on the ritz...?"

There was a few moments where I awaited his response but it didn't come. I was too tired to be irritated with his unresponsiveness, and so I looked at him sternly, only to see his cold, warlike eyes set behind me. My stomach sank in a cold pool...

Finally hearing the approaching footsteps, I looked the best I could into the direction as Leo gently laid me on the drier pavement. I could see the determined Elite Guard, suddenly without his left hand, coming forward, furiously glaring at my brother.

Slowly, Leo stood, not saying a word to me or the Elite. His left knee buckled as soon as he stood and I could see the pulsating, liquid-like tissue over top of his bare ankle. The farther up his body I looked, the more I realized how disfigured my brother was...

"You ... his hand?" I managed weakly.

"Yeah," Leo whispered. A pained look came to his face. "I hope... I hope that Raph and Don come fast..."

I did, too.

The Elite dragged himself closer.

"These guys are tougher than the usual Foot soldier," Leo growled to himself, his teeth gritting at his miscalculation. He must have thought that a dismembered hand would have been enough to stop him. "They truly have mastered Mind Over Body."

At the same time we groaned, "Shit."

"Don... Raph," I tried to reason with Leo as the Elite straightened, his good hand held his blood drenched axe.

The farce was over, the Elite charged and a glisten in Leo's eyes caught my attention − they were filled with something I had never seen before. I suddenly felt a fear overwhelm me like I had never felt before and I realized... this was it.

"Not this time, Mike," he said before looking back at me. "I love you, Michelangelo."

My brother used a cross block and held for about half a second before the tearing of his tendon caused him to scream and he came soaring backward onto his shell. I had to take in what he just said. No, he couldn't mean what I thought. That look in his eyes couldn't have been what I thought it was.

The Elite held up his axe, but Leo swung his good leg around to kick it out of the way. It didn't stop the onslaught for long, though, as the Elite merely pulled my brother's neck into a choke hold with his handless arm, tucking him into his pit as his remaining hand attempted to grab hold of Leo's cheek to quickly snap his neck.

We had to get out of this together, right? It's what we always do.

Leo bit into his arm, blood seeping through his teeth as the Elite uttered a rare noise, releasing my brother. He couldn't move, though, not far. The Elite grabbed his bad ankle and slung him into the watery passage of the tunnel.

My brother was more than a brother to me – he was everything I'd always needed, a leader, a hero, a mother, a friend, a brother – my brother.

I heard Leo release an ungodly noise from his throat and felt myself grow light headed as the Elite found his axe and neared him. My brother couldn't get up. I knew that the same glisten was in his eyes as I saw earlier. I could only cringe as the axe came down upon his shell in the most shattering, unforgetful noise I had ever heard.

We were always there for each other. Honor codes. Never leave another behind.

"OH, GOD!" Leo cried.

I felt my lids close as the scurry of familiar feet through the water echoed toward us. I heard my brothers screaming, and I willed myself to open my lead laden lids again to no avail. I did not need to look to see what was happening.

I'd seen the look of defeat in my brother's eyes; it remained as my only conscious vision, but instead of screams and the splatter of water, I heard us in the theater, laughing together, the smell of popcorn and the whispers of an audience laughing with us...

Master Splinter hung up the phone and looked at me. I felt like a child, sitting on the tatami mats before him, teary-eyed and feverishly taking in his herbal tea as if some of its magic would help me feel better about the situation.

"Your transportation has been arranged," he smiled softly as he spoke. I didn't think it was that great.

I felt like I was being urged by two forces to go on this voyage, one being my father and the other being my longing to see Leo again, to feel his presence as I had when I was cradled against his plastron so lovingly.

But my guilt was telling me to stay home...

"Okay," was all I could say to the news. I looked up from my tea as I saw him near me. "What?"

"Are you not to tell your brothers?" he asked with a raise of his brow.

Now wasn't that a thought?

"No," I said. "Don wouldn't let me go..."

"He shall if I have said you may," Father stated confidently, giving me that look of 'I'm the true authority, remember?' "I do believe, Michelangelo, that you should at least inform your brothers of your trip."

We both looked to his screen door as their arguing voices were raised yet again.

It was not often that Don yelled, but when he did it was scary like you don't even know. Pissed Don is Scary Don.

"Okay," I sighed, as if one had a choice against Sensei...

We made our way out and it didn't take long to find my two brothers. They had made it from Raph's room to the entrance of the gym, an astounding twenty feet.

"He's your brother, Raph! What the hell is the matter with you?" Don snarled. "He thinks you hate him!"

"Leo was my brother, too, Don!" Raphael snapped crossly, his eyes narrowed at our normally complacent ninja. "Why do you always forget him?"

"Ahem!" Master Splinter cleared his throat as we neared close enough. The two straightened and looked at our father in awe and embarrassment, particularly at my juxtaposition to him. "Your brother has an announcement to make."

The blood warmly rushed to my cheeks and I could feel my hot tears forming again, I didn't want to admit what I planned to do. My jaw line trembled, making my lips feel like a blubbery mess without control, but I had to say something − anything would be better than this silence with six eyes staring at me.

"I-I'm going to go to Northampton," I stuttered, causing a collective gasp between Raph and Don. "To-to see Leo..."

Don's face was horrified. "Mike... you're in no condition−"

"He is in condition, Donatello," Master corrected my brother.

There was yet another awkward silence and Don rubbed his face. He was struggling to not cry in front of me, the world he was fighting for was disintegrating before him, and he had not a clue what to do to help it.

Raphael stared at me with disgust at my announcement.

Master Splinter narrowed his eyes at Raph after I had stepped back from his gaze. "You have an objection, Raphael?"

"No," Raph muttered before turning on his heels to exit through the gym, his sanctuary, as usual.