Chapter Ten:

I got home first at the end of our never ending shift, clearing up the place a little then playing the messages on the answer machine from my mother before I jumped in the shower. I couldn't believe that conversation with Nick actually happened today; I held back my tears until now. I finally told him how I felt after all this time and he completely rejected me. Deep down I always knew it was going to happen like this, but it still came as such a shock to me. My body involuntary trembled under the gentle spray of the shower. I slid down the tiled wall and hugged my knees close to my chest as I cried into my knees.

At least now I know.

Nick came home about two hours later. I was sat on the sofa in my pyjamas with a pot of ice-cream, watching TV when he walked in. He didn't say 'hello' like he usually does, let alone look at me just jumped straight in the shower then spent over an hour in his bedroom before he walked out to the sofa where I was laying, standing over me.

I looked up at him nervously. "What's up?" He dropped to the coffee table in front of me, looking into my eyes.

"Greg, I didn't mean to hurt your feelin's."

"You didn't." I huffed, licking the melted ice-cream for the spoon. "I won't bring it up again." I assured him.

"Greg whether we bring it up again or not, you're always goin' to be thinkin' about it and lookin' at me differently coz I'm the jerk that broke your heart..."

"This heart break was actually easier than the rest. I swear I won't ever bring it up again. I'm not expecting anything from you. If you're not into guys or . . . me, it doesn't matter. You'll still be my friend." He stared at me a moment then grabbed the remote from my lap to mute the TV.

"Okay that was a total lie." He shifted slightly closer, looking into my eyes.

"What was a total lie?" I asked confused.

"Okay . . . usually when I talk to girls about this sorta stuff, it's so much easier. I feel comfortable around them..."

"You don't feel comfortable around me?" I asked shifting slightly to sit cross legged on the sofa.

"No, it's not that. I . . . I just feel awkward. It was a total lie that I told you I'm not into guys."

"You mean you do?"

"Sometimes . . . yes. But Greg..."

"How can you only like guys sometimes?" I asked frowning at him.

"I don't know!" He almost shouted at me.

"How could you lie to me like that? You're always shouting at me for being so dishonest, how could you lie to me like that?" I retorted.

"Because it's a really awkward thing to bring up in conversation." He explained, rubbing the back of his neck. "With girls it works, but guys . . . I just feel awkward, like it's not right."

"Awkward how?"

"Greg . . . I've never been with a guy before. I mean never. Never kissed or touched another guy even though I've been attracted to them so I was a teenager." He explained. "I've wanted to go out with guys . . . but I always feel awkward before I even . . . it just doesn't work okay. I'm into guys . . . I've even thought about you a couple of times."

"You have?" Yes! My suspicions were absolutely right!

"Okay please shut a second." He pleaded seeing me get excited. "I'm tryin' to explain my biggest secret here to you and it's really hard when you keep talkin'."

"Sorry, go ahead."

"Okay." He took a deep breath looking me in the eyes. "I'm attracted to guys, but I lean more towards girls. They're easier..."

"Just because you can get into their pants quicker?"

"Greg, could you please just shut up for five freakin' minutes!" He shouted. I nodded, playfully zipping my lips together then tossed a key over my shoulder. Nick's mouth spread into a wide grin as he rolled his eyes at me. "You're crazy, you know that G?" I nodded again keeping my lips tightly clamped shut. "Okay . . . If you let me finish, I meant they're easier as in, you don't get hassled for bein' with a girl coz it's completely normal and natural. I'm sorry, I can't be what you need Greg."

"Why not because I'm not a girl? That's a total bullshit excuse Nick, that's just like saying you won't date Sara because she has brown eyes."

"This is a little more complicated than your eye colour Greg."

"So you're happy going through your life with endless one night stands and a failed marriage on your record?"

"Greg..."

"Are you really happy with your life as it is Nicky?"

"Greg, just shut up!" He pleaded again. I clamped my lips shut, leaning back against the sofa cushions. "Greg I'm sayin' I can't. Bein' with guys is very different from bein' with girls. Even if I do like you . . . I can't be with you Greg, not in that way. I can't be what you need." Nick clicked the volume back on the TV for me then walked off towards the kitchen to grab himself a coffee before I could speak again.

I climbed to my feet deciding not to give up just yet, setting the ice-cream tub down on the table. "Nicky, how can you give up on something you've never tried?" I asked leaning against the counter as he started to boil the kettle. "If you've never been with a guy then how can you be so quick to turn it down?"

"Greg, do you realise how much we'll be hassled at work?"

"Who's gonna know Nicky?" I asked, biting my lower lip slightly. "We don't have to tell anyone, it can just be between us."

"Greg, No. I can't . . . I just can't okay." He pushed past me grabbing a beer from the fridge then walked off to his room down the hall. I watched him go, anxiously gripping the counter behind me.

I walked back into the front room, throwing myself back onto the sofa cushions, trying to think. Nick really was a very heavily closeted gay man. He didn't say there was anything specifically wrong with being gay; he was just worried about being hassled by the guys at work. Since Warrick found out about me, he's never treated me differently. Maybe I should tell Nick that? Or maybe he'll just be mad that Warrick knew about me before he did.

A few hours later I fell asleep on the sofa in front of the TV. Nick returned to the fridge to grab something to eat, startling me awake. "Sorry." He muttered, walking towards me. "Didn't mean to wake you."

"That's okay." I stretched out, sitting up to look at the time. "Don't you have a date?"

"I cancelled." Again? He's always cancelling his dates now. Nick sat down on the coffee table in front of me, watching me rubbing my eyes awake. "What are your plans today G?"

"Why?" I asked curiously, wondering if I was still dreaming.

"Well remember you said I could paint my room since I'm goin' to be livin' here a while?" I nodded wondering how drunk he was. "Why not today? You wonna help?"

"Is this your way of trying to make me feel better?"

"Kinda." He nodded. "Is it workin'?" I nodded giving him a smile. "Good, go get changed, I don't fancy walkin' round the store with a guy in pyjamas." He joked climbing to his feet.

I jumped to my feet, walking off down the hall to my room. I'm definitely awake and he's acting like nothing happened. In some ways . . . that's worse!

In the store I leant against the trolley, watching a married couple arguing over what colour to paint the kitchen. Even though they were arguing, the love was clearly there. I wanted that so badly. Someone to love me for who I am.

"Hey, which colour do you think?" Nick asked, appearing with a pot of dark blue in one hand and dark green in the other.

"You might wonna consider getting out of the darks there cowboy." I suggested. "Don't you see enough darkness in your life?"

"So what I should get a white or yellow?" He asked cringing.

"Yuk . . . no way." I chuckled, rolling my eyes at him. Nick followed me towards some shelves stacked in slightly lighter coloured paint tins. "See this is more your style." I held up a lighter blue, watching his expression. "What?" I asked as he stared at me blankly.

"Nothin' . . . you recon this is the colour for me then?"

"Definitely."

"Now we need paint brushes and things." Nick took hold of the trolley, leading the way.

I shoved my hands in my pockets following him. This was as close as I was ever going to get to Nick. It made my chest ache with a pain I've never felt before, and I didn't like it.

When we got back to the apartment, we sat down in front of the TV with our burritos we bought, eating together in silence.

"Okay, so you wonna paint the room now? We've got the day off tonight so we can sleep in then?" Nick suggested once he finished his second burrito.

"Sure." He grabbed the rubbish from my lap, taking it off to the kitchen to wash his hands.

"You wonna change your clothes first G?" He suggested.

"Okay." I climbed off the sofa heading to my room to change into some old clothes. Nick sat a moment longer then went to his room, moving his things out into the hall then covered his furniture and things with plastic sheets.

I wore an old pair of ripped jeans and a white t-shirt, watching Nick from the doorway as he stuck masking tape around the plugs and light switches. He's such a perfectionist. Each piece of tape had to be perfectly aligned before we could start.

He opened the tin of blue paint, handing me a tray and a roller. I watched as he skilfully poured me a small amount then handed it over. I flashed him a grin as I whirled around, starting on the wall opposite his bed. I could feel his eyes watching me, but I tried to concentrate on the wall knowing if I didn't do it right the perfectionist might bite my head off.

He put some of his hick music on while we painted opposite walls in complete silence. Not the first thing most people do together after getting proof that the other one love's them, but Nick was a heavily closeted gay man with hundreds of bolts across his door after all, and completely in denial about it. He's probably convinced himself he's completely straight, even though he told me he's thought about being with guys since he was a teenager, and me. I can't believe the man of my dreams has really thought about me in a sexual way. It's a dream come true . . . almost.

We stopped for some beers when two out of the four walls were done, sitting on the edge of Nick's plastic covered bed. "How come yours looks neater then my side?" I asked, turning to face him.

"Because you went in all directions, you're meant to go in straight vertical lines." Nick chuckled, nudging me with his elbow.

"Sor-ry Mr Perfectionist." I laughed, nudging him back.

"C'mon, let's get the other half done so we can do a second coat." He finished off his beer, pulling me to my feet. I dizzily bumped into him watching him smile. "Three beers and already your dizzy." He laughed. "Lightweight."

"I have a smaller body then you. It takes less alcohol to affect me." I explained, grabbing my paint tray again. "And I'm a Nordic Californian boy, you're a Texan jock."

"That's your explanation, huh?" He smirked. "Just make sure you paint the walls Einstein." He chuckled, returning to his paint tray to start on the wall behind me.

I turned sideways slightly to see Nick staring at me. He turned back to the wall, pretending he wasn't looking, continuing to paint again. I decided to mess with him a little as the alcohol was fuelling me now. First I fanned my face, pretending it was really hot in here. Nick noticed me straight away. He watched as I pulled my t-shirt up over my head, tossing it to his bed so it wouldn't get paint on it. I continued painting topless, occasionally looking sideways to see Nick gaping at me. I couldn't tell if he was looking at my figure, or the scars, even though he's seen them before. But I loved his lustful gaze.

I purposely slicked my roller up with too much paint so a drip would drop to my chest as I lifted it. I caught Nick watching the glob of blue paint sliding down my flat chest towards my navel. I noticed he even had to bite his bottom lip, probably to keep from moaning. I slid my finger through the glob by my navel, wiping it to the edge of the tray then continued painting. He was obviously hard from the large bulge forming in the front of his tight jeans he always wears. I could see the discomfort in his eyes as he shifted his hips on the spot.

"I'm gonna go get another beer." Nick anxiously announced, heading out the room. I tried to hold in a laugh as he practically legged it out of the room. He returned a few minutes later, avoiding eye contact with me as he continued painting his side of the wall, chugging back his beer.

Once all the walls were painted, we stopped to play some X-box games while we waited for it to dry to add the second coat. Nick and I sat side by side on the sofa, chugging back beers as we raced each other on 'Need for Speed.'

"No!" Nick shouted, nudging me, trying to distract me as I overtook him. I laughed pushing him back, beating him to the finishing line.

"Yes!" I cheered victoriously. "You have to say it now." I laughed poking him in the chest.

"I never agreed I would."

"Yes you did." I laughed tickling him. "You promised me you'd say it if I won three times in a row!"

He rolled his eyes, huffing loudly. "Greg . . . you are The Master." He reluctantly said, pulling my hands away from his chest. "One more round?" He requested.

"Done, I am so going to beat you again!"

"Not on your best day Sanders." He laughed, starting up another match. He grabbed his beer off the table, chugging back the rest then leant back against the cushions of the sofa, right beside me.

Halfway through the race he started nudging me again, trying to distract me. I moved my controller out of his reach, concentrating on the race, overtaking him again, heading straight for the finish line. Nick tried to reach for my controller again, trying to make me crash, but I held it up over my head as he pushed me down onto the couch.

"You can't beat me Nicky." I laughed as he tickled me, crossing the finish line and winning again. "Yesss!" I cheered, looking up at him with a smug grin.

"That's so not fair." Nick pouted, still with his hands on my chest, holding me down on the sofa. "One more round?"

"I'm gonna beat you again Nicky, we'll be here all night." I chuckled.

"We'll swap cars this time, you drive mine." Nick restarted the race, handing me his controller. I handed over mine, sitting back on the sofa, ready for the race. Nick was desperately trying to control the car I made, steering it through the track. I knew his car was slightly slowly so I used the shortcuts, crashing into obstructions for Nick to crash into. "Hey, you cheated!" Nick protested in an almost childlike voice.

"It's not my fault they put these things in the game." I laughed, speeding towards the finish line. Nick tried to nudge me, distracting me again. I pushed him down onto the sofa, leaning across him to distract him. Nick rolled our bodies; we crashed to the carpet below with me underneath him, both staring at the television screen trying to beat the other.

"Yes!" Nick cheered, crossing the finish line. He sat up on my hips, laughing victoriously. "I told you I was gonna beat you!"

"What was that like one in five times? I'm still The Master." I declared, laughing. I placed the controller on the floor beside me, leaning up on my elbows, looking at Nick. His lips suddenly advanced closer to mine, completely surprising me. I opened my mouth more, allowing Nick's tongue to caress my own. Unlike Ryan's bitter tasting kiss, Nick tasted sweet. His warm tongue glided in my mouth, softly sucking on my lips. It was the perfect kiss. The dream kiss! The kiss everyone searches for their whole lives . . . and I had finally found it.

Nick looked into my eyes, his lips just inches from mine. "Sorry." He panted, climbing off me, to sit on the edge of the sofa. I wanted to speak, but I completely froze up, laying on the floor still.

Nick sat a moment thinking, he suddenly climbed to his feet, grabbing his coat. I lay there just letting him walk right out of the apartment door.

I quickly scrambled to my feet, running after him. Unfortunately for me he went down in the elevator, the doors closed as I reached them, we're on the eighth floor and I had a few too many beers in me. I had to take the stairs down, running as fast as I could, using the rail to support myself in case I fell over then burst through the door at the bottom, seeing the empty elevator doors just reclosing. I frantically searched the lobby, seeing Nick was already on his way out the front door.

I ran after him, round to the parking lot, managing to wedge myself between his car door before he managed to close it. "Nicky..." I panted heavily. "Please... can we... talk about this?" I breathlessly asked.

"Greg, please step back." He simply said, avoiding eye contact with me.

"Please... Nicky, can we... just talk about... this a second?" I wheezed.

"No, I need some space. Back Up!" He demanded again. "Greg, please . . . don't make me push you."

"Nicky... why won't you just... talk to me? You kissed me!"

"Greg, I have to go! Would you just get out of the fuckin' way!" He yelled, clutching handfuls of his hair.

"Nicky you can't drive. You've had too much to drink." I simply explained. Nick rested his head on the steering wheel, panting heavily as he realised I was right. "I can't let you drive out of here Nick." I watched him a moment then saw a tear rolling gently down his cheek. "Nicky, what's wrong?"

"I don't want this to happen. I've fought so hard. I can't let it happen." He sobbed.

"Fought so hard to what?" I asked the emotional drunk.

"I don't want you, I don't!" He held his head in his hands, sobbing quietly.

"Why did you kiss me then?" I asked.

"Because I wanted to." He started to tremble slightly. This was it, finally it. Nick had taken a step out of that sealed vault of his and his world was shattering to pieces around him.

"You wanted to kiss me?"

"Yes." He blubbered, looking up at me with his puffy red eyes and tear stroked cheeks. "I'm sorry." He wept softly. "I can't be what you need Greg . . . I'm not gay." The kiss says otherwise!

"Nicky, you don't have to be gay to like me."

"But I don't wonna be gay." I looked at him in awe. I've never seen Nick look so vulnerable before.

"Nicky your still you..."

"I just kissed my best friend though." He sobbed, clutching his head.

"Nick, being gay isn't a choice. It's who you are. It's nothing to be ashamed off."

"If that's true then why did you hide it from me?" He asked.

"I wasn't so much ashamed . . . I was just keeping my sexuality secret. Just like husbands and wives do, playing around with dominatrix stuff behind closed doors." He half smiled, looking out at me. "Nicky you can't choose to be gay . . . you just are or you aren't."

"But I haven't given into it . . . ever . . . until today."

"You were still gay before, even if you never kissed or touched a guy."

"How can I know for sure though?"

"Only you know the answer to that Nick. Would you prefer to kiss me again or Starla?" Nick rested his head back on the steering wheel. His facial expression said it all, but I still didn't get an answer. "Do you regret kissing me?" I asked shoving my hands in my pockets. He wiped his eyes, looking up at me then shook his head. "And how did it feel? Did it feel wrong?" Nick shook his head again, sniffing back his tears. "How can something that felt so good be something so terrible then?"

"I don't know." He whimpered softly. "My family would kill me if they found out I did that."

"They'd probably kill you if they found out you destroyed your marriage with Scarla too."

"Star-la." Nick corrected, chuckling softly. "I still haven't told them about the divorce either."

"Nick . . . your parents don't have to know. Do you tell them who else you've kissed or tell them all about the sex with all those girls."

"No."

"Exactly . . . so you don't exactly have to tell them this."

"Greg . . . I can't be with you."

"I'm not asking you to be. You kissed me." I reminded him. "C'mon Nicky . . . come back inside." I took a step back, watching him shakily step out of his truck, pushing the door shut then locking it behind him.

"I really kissed you didn't I?" He asked in drunken daze.

"Yeah you did." I smiled slightly. "C'mon, we gotta do a second coat of paint."

"Okay . . . I need another beer." He muttered, rubbing his eyes. I helped him back into the apartment building. We both leant against the elevator wall as the lift took us back up to our floor, neither one of us looking at each other for the whole ride up.

When we returned to the apartment, Nick grabbed two beers, handing me one of them then dropped to the sofa, chugging back his beer, looking on at the television screen still replaying his victory lap.

I leant against the breakfast counter watching him. I couldn't believe he actually kissed me. Now he doesn't want to be with me because he doesn't want to be gay. A very lame excuse, but I'd accept it.

"Wonna paint the second layer now?" Nick asked, finishing his beer within seconds to grab another, probably trying to scrub away the taste of me from inside him. I nodded following him back down the hall to his room.

Nick set his beer down on the cabinet. He sat on the edge of his bed, looking up at me stood in his doorway. "What?" I asked, self consciously folding my arms across my chest.

"I probably made this ten times harder for you by kissin' you." Nick said softly.

"I'll chalk it up to the beers you drank." I stepped into the room, going for the paint pot to fill my tray back up. As I stood up again, I felt his presence behind me. I felt his hand linger across my back, his warm breath on my neck. "Nicky don't." I turned around to push him back slightly. "Don't touch me unless you mean it." I pleaded. I didn't know if I could handle him breaking my heart over this. A kiss I could almost let go of, but physical contact was a little harder to forget.

"Do you really love me Greg?" He whispered softly.

"I really do." I nodded. Nick took the paint tray from my hands, setting it down on one of the plastic covered cabinets.

"No one's ever loved me before Greg." He stuffed his hands in his pockets, scanning his eyes across me.

"Well I do . . . I have for a while. I'm not asking you to be with me Nick . . . I just have to know . . . if you really don't want me." Nick stood in silence, only his eyes were moving across my figure, back towards my eyes.

"I've never been so confused in my entire life."

"Why confused?"

"Because on the one hand . . . I want to touch you." He said looking into my eyes with his, making me melt. "But on the other . . . I don't want to."

"Touch me where?" I asked.

"Greg I can't."

"What's your reason not to?" I took a step closer, taking his left hand in mine, placing it at my hip. "What's your reason not to keep touching me Nicky?" I rasped, looking up into his eyes.

"If I touch you . . . I'll be gay."

"You're gay no matter what you do Nick. You were born that way." I smiled softly. I took his limp right hand, running it under the rim of my t-shirt to softly caress my smooth stomach. "What's your excuse now?" I rasped against his lips.

"I'm drunk."

"You're not that drunk." I let go of his hands, looking up into his eyes. "You can make the decision yourself to go any further." He slowly slid his right hand up slightly, lifting my t-shirt to reveal my bare chest. He stared at the blue stained mark on my chest, from the paint glob that ran down me earlier.

I could tell he was still nervous, watching his lower lip quivering slightly. His fingertips brushed the sides of my chest, leaving faint blue marks, from the paint transfer of the tray he touched. He sank his mouth to my neck, softly kissing and sucking. He gently pushed me back against the wall, colliding my warm flesh with the cold layer of paint.

"See, doesn't feel so bad, huh?" I asked. Nick shook his head, sliding his hands under my t-shirt to lift it up over my head. My skin hummed with excitement as he feathered his fingertips down the centre of my chest, tracing the slight curves of my muscles.

"No . . . not so bad." He took a step back, removing his fingers from my chest. "I want to kiss you." He nervously spoke.

"Go ahead." I rasped. Nick took a step closer, placing his left hand on my shoulder as he softly pressed our lips together. He panted his warm breath across my lips before he started kissing me passionately. His hand on my bare shoulder, moved up towards my neck to cup my cheek in his strong hand.

"No . . . I can't." He pulled back slightly, resting his forehead against mine.

"What's your excuse?" I asked looking into his eyes as he continued to pant his sweet seductive breath across my lips.

"I feel dizzy."

I smiled against his lips. "You wonna move to the bed so you don't fall over?"

"Okay." Nick slid his hands down my arms to lace his fingers with mine. He took a few steps back towards the bed, pulling his own t-shirt off, tossing it over his shoulder. I'd seen him topless before, but never this close. He was even more gorgeous then I ever could have imagined. Especially when he pressed his chest against mine, pawing his fingers through my hair as he joined our lips for our third kiss.

"I don't want to..." He nervously spoke, pulling apart.

"We don't have to do that." I assured him. "There are others things we can do." I whispered softly. I slowly lowered my tattered jeans to the floor stepping out of them, pushing them across the floor with my foot.

Watching me remove my jeans made Nick do the same with his. He guided me towards his plastic covered mattress; carefully pushing me back then crawled on beside me, trailing his blue fingertips from my thigh to my neck where he rejoined our lips once again.

Nick slowly broke the kiss, looking into my eyes. "I can touch you anywhere, right?" I nodded watching his blue coated his fingers trailing down my chest leaving a trail to the waistband of my boxers. I loved his new found confidence as he explored my body with his blue fingers, marking my chest with kisses then brushing his fingertips gently across the wet area. He circled his tongue around one of my nipples, softly biting the nub then looked me in the eyes. "I love your flat chest G." He rasped.

"Yeah? Finally in a relationship where you have bigger boobs then your partner." I teased him.

"They're not boobs Sanders, they're pecks." He corrected with a wide grin. He leant on his elbow, looking at my chest and neck covered in a faint blue trail of paint.

"What do you want to do to me now?" I asked him, rolling to my side to face him.

"I don't know." He anxiously bit his lip, looking around the room in a paranoid stance. "Greg, I can't do this."

"Stop." I held him in place on the bed before he ran for the door again. "What are you so afraid of Nick? No one will know." I whispered softly.

"I'll know."

"Nick, do you want to be miserable the rest of your life?"

"Greg, please just stop."

"I didn't force you to do anything Nicky. You touched me out of your own freewill..."

"It was wrong." He scrambled off the bed, clutching his head in his hands. I remained on the bed hoping he'd change his mind.

"Here." I reached for his paint tray, grabbing the paint brush, placing it in his hands. "If you don't want to touch me yourself . . . that's fine. Use this." He looked at the paint brush in his hands then watched me lay back on the bed with my eyes closed. I figured the less eye contact the easier it would be for him, and I was right. Within a few seconds I felt the soft bristles of the paint brush, tickling their way up my leg towards my thigh. I gave out a soft moan, curling my fists into balls at my sides as the cold blue paint stuck to my skin. I felt the mattress shift slightly as he eased himself back on, caressing the brush across my stomach.

I gasped under the touch, arching my chest towards it. He continued across my chest, erupting a few more soft moans and gasps from my lips. I felt his fingertips across my navel again, desperately fighting for control over my body. I kept my eyes closed, feeling his mouth against mine, kissing me softly. His tongue danced with mine, softly nibbling on my lips as he deepened another kiss, sucking my tongue into his mouth.

He trailed the paint brush across my chest again, making me shiver slightly. I had never felt like this with anyone in bed before and all he was doing was brushing a paintbrush across my body along with the gentle brush of his finger tips now and then.

As his confidence started to increase, he worked a trail of kisses across my exposed body then returned to my lips, sucking my tongue into his mouth again. I loved the pure sweet taste of him, and he was such an amazing kisser, sending tingles of ecstasy throughout my body.

"Open your eyes." He whispered softly. I did as instructed, looking up into his big brown lustful eyes. "Do you want to touch me?" He asked, swirling a fingertip around my navel. I nodded then watched as he lay back on the bed beside me, getting into a comfy position.

I slowly rolled to my side to face him. He gave me a nod to let me know he was ready. I kissed his forehead, eyelids, nose, slowly moving down to his cheeks, lips and chin, kissing a trail across his jaw line, watching his eyes fluttering and gentle moans escaping his throat.

I licked and kissed a line to his nipple, gently blowing on the cold saliva trail, making him shiver slightly. He gave out another moan as my mouth closed over his nipple, gently sucking it until the nub rose under my tongue. I scoured my tongue across his broad chest to do the same to the other one. Never had I been in bed with a man that really took care of his body before.

Nick whimpered, arching his chest up as my tongue swirled down the middle his chest, circling his navel then stopping at the rim of his boxers. I kissed a line up the centre of his chest again, returning to his mouth, engaging in a lusty deep kiss as I slipped my hand below his waist for the first time to hold his hip. He moaned softly, arching his chest up towards mine.

"Greg . . . stop." He gasped, curling his fists into balls at his sides. I brought my mouth to his ear, gently nibbling on his lobe.

"What do you want me to do, Nicky?" I whispered softly. His body shuddered slightly as I lay flat on top of him, our hardened erections gently brushing. Nick clenched his eyes shut a moment, biting his bottom lip as he tried to control himself.

"Get off me." He opened his eyes to look up at me. I climbed off him, sitting on the bed beside him. "I'm sorry Greg." He whimpered apologetically, covering his hands over his eyes. It wasn't until I heard him sniffle that I realised he was crying.

"Nicky, what's wrong?" I lay on my side, watching him.

"My chest hurts."

"Why?"

"Because I want you . . . but I can't allow myself to have you." He explained, wiping the tears from his eyes to look up at me. "I have this achin' pain inside of me every time I turn you down."

"There's a simple cure." I smiled softly.

"What's that then Einstein?"

"Don't turn me down." I smiled wider.

He smiled back, wiping the tears from his face again. "I feel sleepy." Nick leant up on his elbows, looking around the room, before returning his gaze to me. "Greg could you . . . could you lie with me?"

"Sure." I nodded. He wrapped his arms around my body, pulling me against his own. I rested my head on his shoulder, circling my arm around his chest.

"Thanks Greg." He whispered softly, pressing a kiss to my forehead.

Please Review

I watched Jurassic Park, The Lost World and Jurassic Park 3 adjusting this. So if I mentioned dinosaurs anyway I'm sorry lol. No Beta this time, I wanted to get the chapter to you as soon as I could. I hope you enjoy it. This is like the fourth version of this chapter and I think its the best one of the story so far.