-My True Identity-
Chapter Ten
By a Midnights Dream
*credit goes to Chocopokkin for giving me the gist of this idea ;)
Disclaimer: All characters(except for some), items, places and themes mentioned within this story have been created and are licensed by Bones Productions, Kieko Nobumoto, and Toshitsugu Iida. So if you're with SOPA then get off my ass.
"I like this." I smile, looking out the rusted window pane of the decrepit old bus I'm hiding in. "This idea of friends waiting for other friends. It's really a nice feeling…" I close my eyes and allow myself to relish this peaceful state of bliss because…sadly I have a feeling that it won't last long.
My companion next to me says nothing and a brief silence grows between us.
"…Know what I mean?" I say, trying to lighten the tension and turn towards her with a friendly smile.
Cheza, the flower maiden.
I've been given charge to watch over her while the others scout an escape route out of the city. She's only been with us for a day or so but already she's demonstrated some of her amazing powers! Seriously, it's like Cheza was made for us wolves. Her voice is so soft and gentle on our sensitive ears. And she smells really nice all the time, but it's never overbearingly strong like human perfume. She's nice and light and her touch is so gentle. I really like having her around.
Though…That's more than I can say for Tsume. Ever since Cheza's showed up he's been really wary of her, but in my opinion I don't think she's done anything untrustworthy. I suppose that's just Tsume's nature. He was wary of me too after all when we first met. I guess he just needs some time. But still, he doesn't have to be so mean to her like that…Speaking of Tsume…
"Aaaaahhh…." I groan and slap the heel of my hand to my forehead as I remember the awkward moment in the snow field. The averted glances and deafening silence may have only lasted a few minutes, but I'm still feeling awkwardly uncomfortable and mortified about the whole thing. I just keep replaying that scene over and over again in my head: me on top of Tsume, grinding his crotch and moaning like a wild animal…And then Kiba and Hige walking in on us-ugh! How embarrassing! I still haven't completely gotten over that, and don't I think Tsume has either. It just seems like his movements around me are more controlled lately, like he's afraid to touch me. He probably feels embarrassed anytime he looks at me. I blush and whine further.
"Is something the matter?" Cheza trills in her sweet sing song voice.
"Hunh? Oh-uh no, I guess…well…I mean…mmmnn…" I whimper, unable to adequately express myself.
"It is alright." Cheza reassures and places a hand on my knee. It sends a thrill through me that I can't fully explain. It is invigorating yet…calming. "This one understands."
"Hunh?! Y-You do?" I blink my eyes in disbelief as she nods her head. How could it be that she's so in tune with me? Honestly I've barely just met her and she knows what's going on with me better than I do.
"You are confused about Tsume, is that right?" she asks and I have to avert my gaze as I blush and nod my head. "Do not worry. Tsume says harsh things and acts unkindly because he is afraid of what others will think of him. He wants to be strong and independent. Though he might show you coldness, this one is certain he cares for you. This one can feel it." She places a delicate hand over her heart and lets her magenta eyes close.
I feel my heart skip a beat. "You really think so?"
Cheza smiles in a way that makes her whole face glow and nods her head reassuringly.
I'm powerless to contain a relieved smile from sprawling across my face. I don't know why, but talking to Cheza has really made me feel a lot better about this whole situation. Before I can stop myself I throw my arms around the flower maiden and squeeze her pleasantly in a hug. I keep forgetting she's blind and I feel a little bad when she gasps from surprise. But she quickly forgets it, smiles and pats my arms. "Thanks Cheza." I smile, "Thanks a whole lot!"
"Okay, ready? When Kiba walks in and sees we're not here, we'll jump out and surprise him okay?"
"Toboe, are you sure this will be alright?"
"Of course! C'mon we'll only be having a little fun. Don't worry Cheza- Ooh! Here he comes! Ready…?"
I perk up my ears and listen intently for the thudding of Kiba's steps coming into the bus. Thud, thud, thud there they are. He's stopped now. He must be confused because he doesn't see me or Cheza around. Now's our chance! All at once me and Cheza jump out from behind the bus's front seat and shout "Aha!" to surprise Kiba. I wait for the look of shock, and then laughter to register on my leader's face. But it doesn't.
Kiba is stoned faced and unamused.
It's then that the awkward silence sets in. "Uuuuhh….aha ha. What took you so long?" I say trying to act nonchalant.
Thankfully Hige enters the bus then and starts talking about the humans that are surrounding us. This topic of conversation and Tsume's absence starts to make me a little nervous. Where is he, anyway? Then Tsume's musky scent of sunshine and crushed cedar needles fills the cavity of the bus as he too steps inside. I feel my gut lurch and my face bloom with color. I quickly drop my gaze to the ground, unable to look him straight in the eye.
"I've found an escape route that'll be perfect for tonight." His voice echoes off the bare, metal walls.
"That settles it then." Kiba concludes. "We'll leave at sunset tonight."
I dip my head in agreement and feel a surge of anticipation. I'm not even worried about getting out of here alive tonight, I'm just happy that I won't have to sit around in this stupid bus anymore.
The guys take up different spots in the bus and for the time being they all relish the chance to rest before our big rush tonight. I feel a little down. I can practically feel the distance between me and Tsume like it's a physical wall. I sigh. Then I start thinking about what Cheza said:
'Though he might show you coldness, this one is certain he cares for you. This one can feel it…'
Her reassuring words soothe me a little bit and even fill me with just a touch of happiness. I'm the type of person to give myself good advice but…I don't know…for some reason it always convinces me if someone else says what I'm feeling. Especially about Tsume. I mean, it's not that I didn't know that he cared for me. That much is obvious, but I'm just so insecure that if someone else reassures what I'm feeling, I believe it, you know? And even more so because Cheza said it. She's so in tune with us wolves, I bet she was reading into Tsume's feelings when she said that. So it's probably a fact!
Knowing this I…I don't know, I just feel like I should do something for Tsume. Just to let him know that I care too, even though I might not blatantly show it all the time. What to do though…I sit on the floor of the bus tapping my fingers against my pant leg. When suddenly it hits me: I'll get him a present! Yeah, won't that be great? I bet I could find something lying around here that Tsume might like. And I've been inside this stinking bus all day, I need some air.
"Rrrraaagh!" I yawn, stretching and standing up. "Hey guys, I gottah take a whiz."
"Ugh, TMI." Hige says, wrinkling his delicate nose.
I make a face at him. "I'm gonna step out for a bit. I won't be gone long."
"Make sure you're back here before dark." Tsume gruffs as I pass by him. His voice gives me shivers. "If you aren't then we're leaving without you."
At first his words hit me like a cold wind. Would he really leave me behind like that? But then I just smile and dip my head. I know Tsume wouldn't do that to me. He's already proven that multiple times. He just wants me to know that he's really serious. For once I marvel at how much better I'm getting at reading Tsume. "Kay…" I murmur softly and walk past him out of the bus.
We're stationed in a junk yard so you think there'd be a whole bunch of neat stuff lying around, right?
Wrong.
There's absolutely nothing here. It's all garbage: rusted, metal, muddy, stinky, garbage. Aaaw what was I thinking? This is a junk yard after all. I guess they don't call it that for nothing. But still, maybe I can find something for Tsume. I really wanna show him what he means to me. That gets me thinking…what sort of things does Tsume like anyway? Probably something tough or cool looking. Maybe I could find some bits of metal and make a cool bracelet out of it for him-no, that's stupid; Tsume wouldn't wear a bracelet…well…I mean, he wears earrings so…
Uuugh this whole thing was just a stupid idea. I've been all over the junk yard and I haven't found anything that's remotely cool or even recognizable…just twisted metal, smelly mold and rust. I'm just about to call it quits when I smell something unfamiliar behind me. But it isn't human. It's wolf.
"Hey, kid." I hear a voice call above me a moment later. I spin on my heel and crane my neck upwards to where the voice came from. There's a male standing on top a high pile of scrap metal, staring down at me with an expression that's irritated but at the same time apprehensive. He's tall, and of the lean body type and has short, light blue hair that falls in front of his two-toned eyes: One a dark purple, the other a greenish aqua. Geez, I think, momentarily forgetting the situation, what is up with all these irregular colors lately?
I don't have a chance to think any further. I hear the rushing of wind against his clothes as he leaps from the peak of the scrap pile and lands with a heavy thud in front of me. I gasp and take a step backwards.
"What're you doin in my junk yard?" His voice is a menacing snarl and his lip is twitching over his teeth. He starts advancing towards me keeping his strange eyes locked on to mine.
"Uuuhh n-nothin. I-I was just playing around." I make an effort to speak up and avert my eyes down to the filthy ground. Stay calm, stay calm Toboe.
"Oh really?" He asks and I have to look up at him. He's leaning in closer to me with his hands on his hips and one blue eyebrow cocked. "You expect me to believe that you're just out here playing and not trying to steal my territory?"
"Hunh? I wasn't tryin to steal anything of yours. Honest. I was just coming out here for some fresh ai-"
"Don't even try to pull that crap on me, kid!" He interjects. "I know exactly what you're up to."
Crap, I swallow and clench my fingers into fists to keep them from shaking. He's not buying it. A very small, feeble voice wells up from a very dusty part of my psyche and whispers something in my ear: defend yourself. Fight, don't flight. You know what brain? You're right. I'm tired of running into trouble and having to depend on others to bail me out. It's high time I fend for myself. I square my shoulders and force out a wobbley voice."W-Well if you're so smart then you would know that I was just poking around." Yeah, that's right. You tell him Toboe! My inner self cheers. My heart is quivering with uncertainty but I need to learn how to fend for and stand up for myself. "If you don't want me here then I'll just leave." I stick my nose in the air and begin to walk away.
"Wait!" He calls, and there's something pleading about his tone that makes me hang back. "Uh…I-I mean rrrhmm, Alright. I'll forgive you this time, since this is your first offense."
Hunh? Is he serious? But just a minute ago he was all-
"On one condition." His sentence ends with a playful grin.
Oh crap, I swallow. "w-what is that?" I ask hesitantly.
His lips spread apart in a wide, toothy grin. "You have to play one of my games with me."
"Hunh?" I say, and I'm sure my face must look as confused as I feel. Seriously, first he's stand-offish, now he wants to play a game with me?
"And I'll tell ya what, I'll be nice and let you pick what game we'll play: There's hide and go seek, chase, and- my personal favorite- 'gotcha'. I made that game up myself." The male said beaming with pride.
"….Uuuuhh." I'm….sort of too confused to know what to say. Should I be wary of him? Should I consider him an enemy? But he seems so…playful.
"Oh right, I should probably tell you my name first; My name's Youji, and this is my junkyard. What's yours?"
"Uuuhhm Toboe."
"Well that's a really stupid name."
"Hey!" I yell, feeling my cheeks sting from embarrassment. "Who asked you anyway!"
"Jeez, settle down kid. I was only joking." He mumbles, averting his two-toned eyes. "So what'll it be?"
"Now wait just a minute." I say, feeling my resolve flaring. Seeing his withdrawn face only fuels my drive. "You get all in my face, demand to know what I'm doing in your junkyard, and then you make fun of me when I try to leave? You're not very nice, you know that, mister?"
Youji worries at his bottom lip and stares at the ground with a subdued face. "Gee I…I'm sorry…I was…I was just lonely, that's all." His hand comes up to scratch the back of his blue head.
I feel a pang of sympathy in my chest despite myself. "…What do you mean lonely?" I ask him softly.
"Well, I mean…I don't get a lot of visitors. And my boy…he said he would be back, told me to stay here but he…" He sighs through his nose and shakes his head.
"Your boy?" My brow furrows and I roll the word around in my mind, wondering what he could mean. Certainly I don't think he means a son…so… I gasp. "Wait, do you mean…your owner?"
Youji nods his head.
Now that I take a closer look at him, I realize that Youji can't be much older than me. He might even be a little bit younger. "Well, where is he?" I glance around the junk yard, half expected said boy to be hiding behind some junk playfully. But there is no one.
He shrugs. "I don't know. He just walked away and told me to stay." He pauses and his eyes take on a mist, as if he's recalling an unhappy memory. "His face smiled at me but his eyes seemed sad. I don't know why he told me to stay but I always try to listen and be a good boy because it makes him happy…but…"
"…But what?"
"He…hasn't come back."
"What…you mean for a couple days?"
"No. For six full moons."
My eyebrows shoot up at this. He's been waiting here that long?
Silence stretches between us and I think I hear a very faint whine die in his throat. But it could just have easily been a rusty hinge swinging in the wind. Youji blinks his eyes and quickly replaces his crestfallen look with a painful grin. "Aaah but what am I getting all worried about? He's probably just out there lookin for me, that's all. He'll be back…"
I feel a tightening in my chest that makes my eyes water and my lower lip tremble. Poor Youji…what kind of owner would do this to him?
"…So, whattaya say? Will you play with me or not?"
It's not all that late out, but I really don't want to be away from the others longer than I have to. Kiba has a tendency to initiate his plans early. But…Youji…I understand his sadness, the grief of a loved owner that's never coming back. I can't…I can't just leave him here like this, alone and sad. I grip my shirt over the area of my chest where there is an aching sensation. I can at least give him my company, even if it's only for a little while. I'm sure it will mean a lot to him. I dip my head in a nod and smile. "Sure. Let's play chase!"
He's behind me. I can feel him almost on me. The closeness of his breath and the sounds of his paws are so close behind me, tearing up the earth, making the hairs on my shackles bristle. I look back and my fears are confirmed. He's close, and the time I spent looking back at him has given him a few extra seconds to creep up on me.
I abruptly turn in a sharp angle to throw him off and he spends a good two seconds reeling and trying to change his direction. We both shift back to humans and I shriek in exhilaration as I turn and see him advancing upon me fast with that wide, playful grin of his.
"No! Don't catch me!" I squeal and hold in a fit of giggles. If I start laughing he'll surely catch me. I'd forgotten how fun it was to play. For the longest time I've been running and running but there hasn't been a shred of playfulness in the type of running I've been doing. I've been running to escape, to search. But for once the pumping of my legs and the rush of air in and out of my lungs fixes giddy smile into my cheeks. For the first time in a long while I'm enjoying myself.
Suddenly my body pitches forward and the ground rushes up to greet me with a solid thud. I land on my back. The impact stuns and knocks the wind out of me. I blink my amber eyes open and gasp to see that Youji is on top of me, smiling. His skin is flushed and his flat chest is heaving slightly from catching his breath.
"'Gotcha'." He laughs breathlessly.
"Haha, oh yeah. Heh heh you got me real good!" I say laughing like a goof.
Youji's smile quickly turns to a wolfish grin and without warning he lunges at my throat with an open maw of fangs. I shriek but feel the tips of his fangs halt just about the vein on my neck. Whew, oh yeah. I forgot, this is all part of the game; Youji's game called 'gotcha' which actually turns out to be quite fun, even though he wins all the time. You chase your opponent around until you tackle them on their back and then you 'get them'. But not really, it's just a harmless game. I then join Youji in his laughter.
All of a sudden I smell something that makes my girly giggles fizzle out. A familiar scent tickles my nostrils: Sunshine, pine, and sweat. A heady, musky, and masculine scent that at any other time would set my loins on fire. But now, it makes the floor of my stomach drop. I don't even have to turn my head to know that Tsume is standing ten yards away. Watching us.
And that's when I consider what this scene between me and Youji would look like to an outsider.
Oh god.
I hear his boots thudding loud and quickly over towards the two of us.
"No, Tsume don't-"
But he is too quick. Before I can even finish my sentence he grabs a clueless Youji by the scruff of his shirt and whips him hard into a pile of metal. My jaw drops open from such raw power. A startled whimper laced with pain shakes past Youji's lips.
"Tsume!" I cry, concerned for Youji's welfare. Youji hardly has time to recoil before Tsume is on him again. With hardly any effort Tsume grips him by his shoulder sleeves and lifts him up to eye level, giving him a slam against the scrap metal for good measure and then holds him there. Youji whines and braces himself for a punch that doesn't come.
Tsume balls his fist in the fabric of Youji's shirt and pulls him close so that their noses are nearly touching. "Give me one good reason why I shouldn't tear your throat out right now." He growls through his teeth.
Youji's eyes are wide and a faint whimpering noise escapes his lips.
Quickly, I scramble to my feet and race to Tsume's side. "Tsume cut it out!" I say frantically. "He didn't mean to hurt me-"
"Stay out of this, Toboe." He growls.
"But you don't understand: he wasn't hurting me, we were just playing!" The words leave my mouth in a rush and the look on Tsume's face does a 180 from livid to shock. The silence that follows after makes me blush.
"…What?" His voice is steady and dangerous. It's even, yet brimming with an anger that's only beginning to boil, like a red hot cauldron that's holding molten iron. His golden eyes slide in their sockets to look side long at me.
"We…were just playing together. That's all." I mumble quietly.
"You were playing together?" He asks incredulously, as though he doesn't believe me.
I nod my head.
He turns his narrowed golden gaze back to Youji and releases him. Youji slides down to his bottom with a petrified look on his face. Before I even have a chance to apologize Tsume grips my paw in an iron grip and starts pulling me away. I nearly stumble. Oh god, I can tell just by the way he's holding my hand that he's angry. "We're leaving. Now." He gruffs and leaves no opening for arguments.
"But Tsume I-"
"Toboe!" He snarls and reels around on his heal to face me. I shiver at the heated glare he shoots at me. Why can't I ever keep my mouth shut when my alpha tells me to do something? "Tell me; are you some kind of idiot or something? This guy is a stranger, an outsider. How could you let your guard down like that around him, after all you've been through?" He releases my arm and gives me a pointed glare. "Haven't you learned anything?"
I feel my cheeks sting as I'm being chastised. He's right. All those times I've fallen into situations like this one. I never seem to learn. And every time, who is it that risks his life to come to my rescue? Tsume. He has every right to be angry at me. I wish I wasn't so trusting or gullible but it's just who I am. I wonder if I'll ever learn.
"And just who is that guy anyway?" He growls softly, crossing his arms over his chest. "And why the hell were you playing with him?" It's something about the way he stresses the last word that makes me think he's not really upset with the fact that I was playing, but rather…that I was doing it with another male.
I look down at my toes ashamed and feel my cheeks heat up. "Gee I…I'm sorry Tsume…" I mumble and close my eyes.
"Sorry's not good enough this time, Toboe."
My head snaps up at this. He's leering down at me with a hooded gaze and a single hand on his angular hip. I search into his half lidded golden disks for an answer with my own amber orbs but they are unreadable as a closed book.
"I am so sick of having to wonder if you're out here sticking your nose into places it shouldn't be." His golden eyes flit over to Youji, who's sitting on the ground trying to follow along the best he can with our conversation. He turns his attention back to me and sighs, exasperated. "It's like you're a god damn puppy or something!"
"Hey pal, why don't you leave her alone."
Both of our heads snap over to Youji who is standing with his shoulders squared and defiant towards Tsume.
"…What did you just say?" Tsume's voice is low and dangerous, like a cobra's hiss, and he turns his narrowed gaze round towards Youji.
Oh no. I panic, Please Youji, I know this looks bad but please just be quiet.
"You heard me. I said why don't you just leave her alone." Youji's two-toned eyes are firm and determined. He might have been frightened of Tsume a moment ago when he surprised him but it's clear from his actions now that Youji is not a coward. It takes a lot of courage to stand up to Tsume. I should know.
Oh dear lord, Tsume is starting to walk towards him. His gate is slow and warning. "You stay the hell out of this. This isn't any of your damn business. "
"Oh yes it is!" He says. Youji clenches his fists and shifts about uncomfortably as Tsume draws nearer. "You made it my business by treating her like this. I won't let you treat my friend that way!"
"You've got a lot of nerve, you know that?" Tsume is only a couple feet away from Youji now. He stops and bares his fangs at the shorter male. "You talk pretty highly for someone who just had her pinned to the ground with your fangs at her neck." Tsume raises his hand to strike Youji and the younger wolf braces for impact. "You stay away from her."
"Tsume don't!" I cry and jump in front of Youji.
Tsume's hand halts just a few inches away from my face. His eyes go round and incredulous.
"H-He's right, Tsume." I stammer. Oh god, what am I saying? The words leaving my mouth don't even sound like I'm saying them. It's like the wires in my brain short circuited and my mouth-to-brain filter rerouted to the 'word dump', the place in my cerebral cortex where all of the things I'm not supposed to say go. "Listen I-I know what I did was wrong but you don't have to be so mean about it. A-And for another thing you shouldn't try to hit Youji. That's really rude and besides, he didn't do anything wrong. So just leave him alone, alright?"
"Are you serious-" He starts to shout but then abruptly shuts himself down with a cool sigh. "…Whatever. Stay here with your little boyfriend and play all you want. It's not like I care or anything." Tsume connects one last leer with Youji and holds him there for a moment. The two males stare at each other before Tsume hooks his thumbs in his pockets and strolls away, his eyes straight ahead. Just like he always does.
I can't tell but…I think I really just hurt Tsume's feelings. It's so hard to tell. That handsome face of his is always trained into a mildly irritated mask, never faltering to allow anyone to see what he really might be feeling underneath. He says he doesn't care...but Tsume says a lot of things that aren't always true, especially when it comes to how he feels. My hand reaches up and grabs the fabric of my shirt over my heart. It hurts…to be honest I kind of forgot Tsume even has hurtable feelings, you know? He does such a good job at hiding them...
"...Who was that guy?" a faint voice murmurs behind me, startling me. I forgot Youji was standing there. "Is he your boyfriend or something?"
"Hunh? Well…no…he's not." I say glumly and stare at my toes.
"He's not? Well then where the hell does he get off treating you like that? Who does he think he is?" Youji asks, only pumping himself up further.
"Well he's not my boyfriend but he…hnnn…" He cares a lot about me and he's worried. I'm just being a stupid child about things like always. That's the only reason why he's so angry with me. And now I basically just told him to go take a hike. Ooooh I wish I could tell him I'm sorry…I'm such a bone head. Why do I always have to mess everything u-
"Hey!"
"Whoa! Oh, uh- what?" I feel the tips of my ears heat up from having been caught not paying attention. Though my mind is still worried about Tsume…
"I was just saying that you should stay here with me." Youji beams.
"Oh, uhhh…" He can't be serious.
"I'm totally serious! Think about it: if you stayed here we could play all the time, and you wouldn't have to worry about that guy yelling at you anymore." I flush as I feel Youji slip his hand into my own. It's warm and uncalloused, a hand that has not known the harshness of hard labor or the pursuit of paradise. "For the first time in many nights I wasn't lonely anymore. You made me happy…" I don't think he knows it or even means to, but he looks at me with sad dog eyes that twinkle in the waning evening light. "I wish you'd stay…"
I feel a lump forming in my throat choking any words from leaving. I shake my head."But I can't do that."
"Why not?" He looks at me and dear god those eyes of his are almost begging me to stay.
"Because I…" I love Tsume. I feel a wave of heat flush across my face that travels all the way up to the rounded tops of my human-like ears. I've never even allowed myself to think that before but it's true. Sure, when I started this journey I was looking for paradise but along the way I found something more. I found a male that I'm hopelessly entranced with and for some reason he doesn't mind keeping me around either. At least…I hope he still doesn't. As much as I'd like to say otherwise, even if this trip suddenly stopped being about searching for paradise I don't think I would mind. Just as long as I was with him…I'll have my own paradise.
Suddenly, a pungent scent wafts into my nostrils. The gritty metal smell of gun powder, leather, and gun polish. Youji can sense it too, and tenses while turning towards the direction of the bus the others are staying in. The humans, I think, my eyes going round. A moment later a barrage of bullets shatter the still night air. I hear their flying metal bodies pierce the rusted body of the bus and the flickering lights from the shooting casts the dead junkyard carcasses into stark shadows before the shooting abruptly stops. The cacophony of noise slowly dies away with an echo when a man snarls in fury. "They're gone!"
Confusion between the men ensue, and I know that my pack has escaped. Just like I thought before, Kiba initiated the plan early. Perhaps…I think with a sinking feeling, maybe that's why Tsume had gone out looking for me earlier, to come and find me because we were leaving. He had come to get me even when he said he wouldn't...fresh salt gets added to my wound. Either way I've made up my mind: I can't stay here. And I can't in good conscience leave Youji here to their devices. They're looking for wolves; If they found him he'd probably be shot at.
I clasp my hand back in his and stare firmly into Youji's two-toned eyes. "Come with me."
"Hunh?! Where?"
"There's no time to talk! If those guys find you here you'll be killed." I start to pull him along but Youji digs his heals into the ground. "Mnnn! Come on! We gottah go now. What's the matter with you?" I grunt, straining from the effort.
"I can't leave." Youji says in a desperate voice resisting me further.
"Nnnnn, why not?!"
"Because!" He sobs. "My boy told me to stay."
I finally snap and say what I've been wanting to say since he told me he'd been waiting along for six months. "Stop lying to yourself, Youji. He's not coming back for yo-"
"Yes he will." Youji screams, and I stop pulling. Youji's hands are clenched into fists at his side and are quivering. "…He will be back for me…" He's staring at the ground with watery eyes, blinking them rapidly. "…I have to stay here for him…"
I swallow with indecision and my amber eyes flicker back and forth from Youji, to the road out of here, and back to Youji again. He won't budge, and nothing I say or do will convince him to come with me. I can't waste any more time here. I have to catch up with the others before I'm caught. But I'm still worried about Youji….
But there's nothing I can do about it if he chooses to stay here. Sadly, I have to leave him.
"Well Then…" I murmur. "I guess this is good bye."
Youji refuses to look up at me but nods his bright blue head. "Yeah…I guess it is."
For a brief moment we are left standing in a sort of awkward silence. I think I should leave now but...it doesn't feel right to. The suddenly Youji's paws pad softly over to me as he closes the space between us. Without warning he tucks a finger under my chin to tip my face upwards towards his and captures my lips in a soft kiss, making my amber eyes go wide. I'm stunned on the spot and am powerless to stop this hot, smothering feeling flush through my entire body, like my entire body is blushing. His hand reaches up to twirl a lock of my honey brown hair and that's when I snap out of it. I shove him away roughly, just as my hormone induced brain tells me to hold him closer, for more. Youji's mouth, now slightly pink, hangs open in a small o as if he wasn't expecting me to say 'no'. He swallows and turns away, forlorn.
"I get it...it's that guy, isn't it?"
"Youji, I-"
"Just save it..." He says with a pained voice and turns to me with a sad smile. "It's alright. I'll be just fine."
The sadness in Youji's eyes puts a clamp around my heart. He's making it so hard for me to just leave him here like this. He's already been abandoned once before, how many times is fate going to keep doing this to him?
'Check over there!' A man's voice calls and we hear the thundering of the soldier's boots.
With one last wistful look Youji smiles and whispers, "Goodbye." And then leaps somewhere where I can no longer see him in the darkness.
'Quickly! I heard voices over here!'
I turn about-face on the heel of my boot and start booking it for the exit out of here. I cast my glance over my shoulder one last time desperately trying to see where Youji could have gone, then I reluctantly pull my gaze away and follow the other's scent.
Weeeeeellll hello there, loves! Long time no see ^^ *sees you pick up chair* Wait, what are you doing 0.o ? oh shit! No please! *Crash* I'm sorry! I'm sorry-have merc- *SMASH* I can change! *THWACK*
Ok…. ~ ok I deserved that. I know, I turned into one of those authors. I wrote a really awesome story, got all of you into it, and then basically dropped off the face of the earth for three months. I'm really sorry about that. But you should know that I'm not a good multitasker. Just ask anybody. So during this fall semester I had to put this story aside for the sake of my grades. But now that the semester's over I can at least think about it ^^ yay! So here's another chapter for you. Still don't know how I'm going to end this thing but hell! I'm just gonna keep rolling with it until I think of something!
And also I'd like to mention that Chocopokkin did suggest the basic idea for this chapter, however Youji is my own personal character whom I've created and I hope you all find him an endearing, lost, big puppy ^^ I kinda went back and juiced up the ending. I noticed that is sucked a little so I made it better.
And now an excerpt from my crazy-ass dreams:
So a few months ago I had a dream that I was Gark F*cking Oak and I was running down this wharf because the police were chasing me. I'm not sure why though: maybe it's because he's ten years old and doesn't have a license and drives around without his seat belt on in a red, convertible sports car…but I digress. So anyway I pulled a pokeball from my back pocket and whipped it through the air and cried out "Boo! I choose you!" All of a sudden Boo the ghost from Mario came out and did his scary face. So I grabbed on to his squishy body and both me and him dove into the water. But I could still breathe and shit. And I was like haha, stupid fucking cops, they can't get me in here. All of a sudden this searing, sharp pain explodes in my foot and shoots up my leg. I cried out and looked back to see it was a snapping turtle biting on my big toe (which when you think about it doesn't make sense because snapping turtles are fresh water animals but I was obviously in the ocean…whatever).It hurt so bad, I was sure he had taken off my toe. I dug my thumb into his eye sockets but he still wouldn't let go of me. And then I thought I could try to pry his beak open with my fingers. And it worked: he let go of me and then drifted away. I really don't remember what happened after that.
And then I woke up to an ordinary day.