AN: stup it u gay fags (1. That's a nasty insult 2. It's also a pleonasm. Ah, well, but you can't spell "stop", let alone know what a pleonasm is. By the way, "stup" means beehive in my country.) if u donot lik (I'm not "licking" your story) ma story den fukk off (I would, but I wanna keep commenting) ! ps it turnz out (what? Ebony is a prep poser?) b'loody mary isn't a muggle (she wasn't a muggle in the first place) afert al n she n vampire r evil datz y (Wow. Spelling "why" like "y". I'm speechless) dey movd houses ok!
I was really scared about Vlodemort (better as "V'lodemort") all day. I was even upset went to rehearsals (Sentence, Y U NO make sense?) with my gothic metal band Bloody Gothic Rose 666. (as opposed to "Sparkly Prep Butterfly 101". I'm really thinking of writing a prep version of My Immortal) I am the lead singer of it (*cough*Mary*cough*Sue*cough*)and I play guitar. People say that we sound like a cross (not pentagram?) between GC, Slipknot and MCR. The other people in the band are B'loody Mary (the cocktail), Vampire, Draco, Ron (although we (the evil goffik guys, perhaps. We, the preps, still call him Ron!) call him Diabolo now. He has black hair now (w...what? no way!) with blue streaks in it.) and Hargrid. (Thank God, I thought it was Hagrid. Phew!) Only today Draco and Vampire were depressed (so unexpected!) so they weren't coming and we wrote songs instead. I knew Draco was probably slitting his wrists (and you aren't doing anything about it, like a good girlfriend) (he wouldn't die because he was a vampire too ( you remembered that? You're progressing) and the only way you can kill a vampire is with a c-r-o-s-s (there's no way I'm writing that) (quote from earlier on: "People say that we sound like a cross") or a steak) (haha, a STEAK! I love steaks, they're so tasty!) and Vampire was probably watching a depressing movie like (the movie that will be made from this fanfic) The Corpse Bride. I put on a (pink! say pink! or any other colour!) black leather shirt that showed off my boobs and tiny matching miniskirt that said Simple Plan on the butt. You might think I'm a slut (now, how did you guess that's what I thought?)but I'm really not. (I don't feel the need to comment this.)
We were singing a cover of 'Helena' and at the end of the song I suddenly bust into tears. (you remembered your main boyfriend is slitting his wrists?)
"Ebony! Are you OK?" B'loody Mary asked in a concerted (like singing or what?) voice.
"What the fuck do you think?" I asked angrily. And then I said. (nothing) "Well, Voldemort (who's this? You did say something about a V'lodemort before, though. That's the way I'm spelling it from now on!) came and the fucking bastard told me to fucking kill Harry! (This girl swears more that Samuel L. Jackson) But I don't want to kill him, because, he's really nice, even if he did go out with Draco. But if I don't kill Harry, then Voldemort, will fucking kill Draco!" I burst into tears. (again?)
Suddenly Draco jumped out from behind a wall. (mwahaha! )
"Why didn't you fucking tell me!" he shouted. "How could you- you- you fucking poser muggle bitch!" (c is dat out of character?) (It's a bit improved, but...yep, still OOC)
I started to cry and cry. (Double crying FTW! I think I'll also start to flame and flame) Draco started to cry too all sensitive. Then he ran out crying. =)) Too...much...fail...in a single paragraph! "Just cry, baby, cry/ 'Cause every tear that flows falls into the ocean" – Carlos Santana
We practiced for one more hour. (So – your boyfriend ran out crying "all sensitive", but you keep practicing? For an hour?) Then suddenly Dumbeldore (yet another evil clone!) walked in angrily! His eyes were all fiery (Haha, Dumbles is angry!) and I knew this time it wasn't cause he had a headache. (I see you have been listening to your flamers lately.)
"What have you done!" He started to cry wisely. (another person who cries? by the way, I think Dumbledore is also bipolar in this. He was angry seconds ago!) (c dats basically nut swering (Nut swearing. Man, I had no idea nuts could swear!) and dis time he wuz relly upset n u wil c y) (j f o p q a b. Geddit?) "Ebony Draco (who's Ebony Draco?) has been found in his room. He committed suicide by slitting his wrists." (but...you just said he couldn't die from that! Not to mention vampires don't have blood. Oh, except for the sparkly guy, Edward Cullen)