AN: OMG, you guys rock! I can't believe I got so many reviews! I love you all! Lol.
Special ANS:
Seleana C, I don't know if it's just mood swings, or if Jude and Tommy are going to have problems. I haven't written that far yet, but I think it might be a combination of both. Jude being temperamental because of the baby, and blowing things out of proportion, and Tommy going crazy trying to make it up to her that he starts making it a bigger problem than it is. But I'll let you know once I've written it.
Wawesome, maybe mood swings are happening, maybe they're not. I honestly don't know yet. But of course I'll update for you ;o).
Ally, you might be onto something there. Something bad might happen. Or maybe something good. Who knows?
Tanya, I love your ideas! Sadie and Jude…both pregnant at the same time?!? OMG, Kwest and Tommy are gonna get the Harrison sisters' wrath! Hello, mood swings!
Gab, you'll find out in this chapter. If I remember to mention it. In case I don't, it's because Jude wanted to shock the hell outta Tommy. As for Jommy, you'll have to wait and see if they pull through. J/k, of course they will. I love Jommy too much to not let them end up together. Unless I'm in a bad mood, in which case either one or both of them will be left without the other. But 9 times out of 10, Jommy rules!
Jess and Alexis, I'm on it. Here's the next chapter (just like you wanted).
Rachel, don't worry. I'll make sure Tommy makes it up to her. Or he can suffer the wrath of Jude Harrison, ultimate rock goddess.
judetomfan101, my thoughts exactly. "Tommy Tommy Tommy"!
One other note, the words in italics are Tommy's thoughts.
Disclaimer: I only wish I owned Instant Star and its characters. But I don't. Except for Tim. He's mine! Lol.
Chapter 10 – All Apologies
Before I could go and find Jude to explain myself, Sadie stormed back in, looking positively livid. "How could you hurt her again? After all you've been through? What do you have to say for yourself?" She jabbed me hard in the chest with her finger, making me wince.
"Sadie, what do you want me to say? That I want this baby more than anything, except Jude, of course, but she jumped to conclusions before I could get a word in edgewise? Or that neither of us were ready to become parents, but hey, I'm willing to be the father of her baby if she's willing to give us a chance to be a family. Take your pick."
"I don't know what I want you to say," Sadie fumed. Then she calmed down long enough to say, "I just want Jude to be her normal, happy self. At least, before she has a little Tommy Q."
"Or a little punk princess Jude," I added helpfully.
"Not helping, Tommy," Sadie cut me down to size. "Just make sure Jude's OK, OK? I don't want my future niece or nephew to be fatherless."
"I'll try, but it's up to Jude to decide," I said, knowing Jude could be stubborn in not giving me a second, OK, thousandth try.
"No, it's not," Sadie argued. "If you want to make up with Jude badly enough, you'll find a way to do it. Now go and make up with Jude already!"
I knew Sadie was right, and I didn't need to look to Kwest for advice. I just had to go out there and prove to Jude that I wanted to be there for her and our baby. But how would I do that? Suddenly, I knew exactly how I would do it. I'd plan a special dinner for us, where all the food items would have the word "baby" in them, and I'd sing a song to her that'd show her how willing I was to be the father of her child. Even if I had to embarrass myself to do it.
I called up the most exclusive restaurant in town, and made reservations. Then I went over to the restaurant to plan the menu for that night, and then I went back home to write a song for her. Especially for her. My whole future was riding on this night, and I didn't want to screw things up again. Never again, I thought to myself. Jude deserves the best, and I'm lucky that she settled for me. Even with all my flaws.
I sat at my desk, scribbling away. Every time I stopped to reread my lyrics, I'd find something wrong with how I'd written it. Pretty soon, my desk and floor were covered in discarded, scrunched-up loose leaf paper. I held my head in my hands, and wondered how to impress Jude this time. The hours passed, and I grew increasingly frantic as I scrambled to express my innermost thoughts. About us, about our baby, about my worries that I wouldn't be as good a father as my father wasn't, about me being afraid to screw things up between us again, about the risk of losing Jude forever if I couldn't make things right, about making my apologies sound genuine, which they were, and about giving Jude what she deserved, the love of a lifetime, her happily ever after, or whatever it was you'd call it that she should've gotten long ago.
I finally got a recording of the song to back me up as I'd sing it to her, and went over to Jude's house, where she was staying. I knew she'd be there, because she wouldn't've wanted to stay with me while we were going through yet another argument that might break us up for good. The only problem was, I'd probably have to face her dad as well. But it was a chance I'd have to take.
I left my place with my portable CD player in tow, and the disc inside the player. I drove to the florist, so that I could get a bouquet of roses to make it up to Jude. Then I drove over to Jude's place, and waited down by the end of the street. Midnight came, and went, and when it was 2 in the morning, I picked up several rocks and threw it at her window.
The light came on, and Mr. Harrison appeared at the front door, Jude right behind him.
"What are you doing here, Tommy?" Mr. Harrison said, very unfriendly.
"I'm here to make up with Jude," I said, as Jude rubbed her eyes groggily, her mouth agape.
"Go home, Tommy," Mr. Harrison said. "It's late, and I don't want to have to do something that I'll regret." He started to close the door, but I put my foot in the doorway so he couldn't.
"Mr. Harrison, please, let me talk to Jude," I begged. Mr. Harrison paused, then opened the door.
"This is against my better judgment, but I'd like to hear what you have to say." Mr. Harrison motioned for me to follow him inside.
"Tommy, what are you doing here?" Jude echoed, clearly not happy to see me. I couldn't blame her.
"Jude, I'm sorry about earlier. I'm just worried that I'm not ready to have this baby with you. I'm afraid that I won't be a good dad, and that our child will be scarred for life because of me. I'm also scared that I'm not good enough for you or our child, and that I'll break your heart again. And that's something that I'll always be afraid of, something I'll always regret doing. But it always turns out that way, no matter how many times I end up trying not to hurt you, I end up hurting you. You deserve better than me, and we both know it." I poured out everything that was on my mind, all my worries, all my fears, and laid it out on the table for them to see. Never before had I been so exposed, so open to anyone. But it was the only way for Jude to let me in again. If she wanted to, that is.
I waited for a response, any response from Jude. But Jude just stood there, expressionless. Finally, she struggled to speak.
AN: So, what'd you think? I know, a horrible place to end this chapter, but I didn't really know how to end it. So don't hate me, OK? I think I know where I want to go with this, but any ideas you have would really help here (hint, hint). Please review! 9 more reviews, and I'll post the next chapter!