Disclaimer: I don't own Ouran High School Host Club

A/N: Hey Guys! These updates just keep getting faster and faster, eh? I would like to thank you guys so much for the reviews, favs, alerts, etc.! I really love it if that could continue.

Big thanks to Of Kings and Queens for beta-ing (my new word) this!

Warnings: Adult Situations, hints of mental illness (depression, delusional disorder)

'word '- people's thoughts

Golden Horizon

He was sure that his life was over. No scratch that, Kyoya was absolutely certain that his life was over now. There wasn't a doubt in his mind that his father didn't know about his companion's visit. He was also 110% sure he'd be on the floor beaten to a bloodied pulp. He deserved every single punch.

He was a horrible son.

A horrible piece of scum that took up air and space. He didn't deserve life because life was just way too good for him.

Kyoya was in deep denial about the fact that there actually was something wrong with his father. But the other side of him thought differently. No, this other side thought his father was a monster. An abdominal cretin bent on making Kyoya's every breath miserable. He hated when he thought about him a lot. Sometimes he'd stay up in the middle of the night scared that what happened only sometimes would become always. The Shadow King wanted nothing but safety and love all his life. If he could just have those two things who knows what his life would be like then? Would he be happy? Would he feel complete?

He shook his head and wiped the stupid tears from his eyes. He was an unloved, unappreciative, and bitter bitch. Even Tamaki himself said he was… but he had apologized right? So it shouldn't hurt him… but it did. It hurt the boy greatly.

He was so awful to Haruhi! The polite girl complimented him and was basically nothing but nice to the boy. She didn't bat an eye to the change of mood Kyoya brought about. She didn't scream and leave him in the rain. She walked him to his house and attempted to make conversation with Kyoya.

The blonde was nothing but worried for the brunette and what had he done? Spewed out nasty words and lashed out at him every chance he got. Tamaki never once backed down. Not even when the boy refused to walk home with Haruhi and him. Despite his mood swings and all, the blonde just turned a blind eye. If anything, his friend was being sincere. He did want to help Kyoya. His best friends' unselfishness made Kyoya yearn for him more. He lay back on the sofa.

This wasn't right. Kyoya had hurt the one person he could count on or thought he could. The boy was sure his friend was sick of him. Everything was his fault. From being born to present day. Every choice he made, every breath he took, they were all his fault. He had turned his father into some perverted psycho that he could barely fight off. If Kyoya wasn't such a whore, everything would be fine! Maybe he should just give up on Tamaki, because he just ends up hurting everyone he loves. The brunette looked up to the ceiling, he was love less. It was impossible for anyone to love him. He was moody, bitchy, weak, and ugly. Sometimes the boy wasn't sure what his fan club saw in him. For what it was worth, he wasn't much of the cool type. He just acted that way.

The familiar pang of loneliness struck Kyoya in the heart.
Who was he? He wasn't cool, romantic, or cute (like Honey). So what type would he be? Sighing, Kyoya got up and walked into the kitchen.

If he were to die this very moment would anyone care? Would someone call 911 or mourn for his death? He took the kitchen knife the same one he used to attack his father with. He laughed bitterly and looked at his reflection. His eyes were dull and puffy from crying. His hair was still somewhat wet slightly sticking from his forehead. Was this really what it came down to? Was this him?

Kyoya didn't even recognize himself anymore. His cheeks were sunken in, eyes dull and his skin was paler than normal. His eyes glossed over as he turned the knife in his hand. People began talking to him, they were angry. They're snarls finding vowels that formed nasty words.

'You are nothing without me.'

'You dirty piece of shit'

'You little bitch'

Heat raised in his bones, he knew this feeling. Screaming he gripped the knife tightly and stabbed the counter top.

"SHUT UP!" he screamed to the voices. They had to leave him alone, just for the night at least.

'You dad didn't love you, you mom didn't either.' they continued.

'Whore!' they all began chanting.

Kyoya closed his eyes and fell to the floor. He covered his ears and sobbed.

"Please… stop! I'm so sorry." The poor boy clutched his head desperately trying to shake the voices from his mind.
He screamed even more when the voices only increased.

'You're so bitter.' Now Tamaki's voice had joined in.
Kyoya opened his eyes and clutched his heart.

"I'm not! Please I'm just so sorry, I'm not bitter." he whispered. The voices only chanted louder

'Slut! Slut! Slut! Slut!' The boy got up and ran to his room or at least made an attempt to. His head began to throb as if it was a ticking time bomb. His knees felt like jello as he tried to walk down the long hallway.

'Faggot!' a lone voice screamed. Kyoya slammed right into the wall, face first. He screamed, clutching his head. The pain shot up his spine, his skin on fire.

"I'm sorry!" he shrieked. The gash on his forehead gushed out blood. His tears mixed with blood as he slid to the floor.

"I'm sorry." he whispered last.

The voices stopped but Kyoya didn't have the strength to get up. He sighed and fell into a tear-stained sleep.

Yoshio smiled at the scene before him. The boy really was a good source of entertainment. Walking out of the shadows he advanced towards his unconscious son. A sadistic smile spread across his face as he check to see if the boy was breathing.

He was going to have a blast tonight.

At the expense of his youngest son.

A/N: Okay so you are now going to push that pretty little button. Tell me what you thought about this chapter because you love Kyoya and don't want to see him hurt, right?

and I'll give you cookies.