Chapter 10: possibly not okay
Orion had been with star for a while, in space, back on earth, in chells house. One thing he knew for sure...is that star was...to put it...nicely...was...kind of messed up. She was in space for at least six years before she met them, and then four years on top of that. She was alone for a long time. And before that no one really liked her.
Then she met joyi, but then was alone again. She...was scared...she was scared of a lot of things, he could tell. But other than that, she was...not really okay. She was sad, and blamed herself for things. It was orion's job to help her.
Make her better. He tried. He tried so hard to make her happy. He couldn't. He couldn't help her.
One day he looked up her symptoms. They told him...that she had depression. And also anxiety. They apparently go hand in hand. Orion told her this...and...she kind of freaked out a little.
He could tell she was getting better though. Well...she was getting better. Then...the bee thing happened. She started to get a bit more scared of...well everything. And she got sad more often.
/ /
Orion lays down next to star as she sleeps. She seems so peaceful. Though she seemed to have constant nightmares. This night seemed to be fine though. He stayed awake, watching her just in case she had a nightmare. He waited till the morning, then went to sleep at around six. He got a few moments of sleep, then star woke up. She put a hand on him. "Hey...good morning." she says smiling at him. "Mmmnnn….no….star…" he grumbles, trying to sleep again. Star seems to be a bit shocked. But doesn't say anything. Just as he was about to fall asleep she spoke again.
"Orion?" he opened his eye tiredly. "What." he says bitterly. Star puts a hand on him. "You okay?" orion sighs closing his eye again. Star i'm tired.
"I'm fine." he says. She sits down next to him. Go away… he opens his eye again. Star looks worried. "Look, i stayed up all night just in case you woke up from a nightmare, i'm fine, just leave me alone. I'm tired." He says, closing his eye again.
Star puts him in a blanket and leaves him alone. He falls asleep finally.
Star knocks on chells door softly but loud enough so that she could hear it. Chell opens the door. She smiles at star, letting her in. she sits back on her bed, next to wheatley. Star sits next to chell. Wheatley looks at star, confused.
"Where's orion?" he asks. Star looks at her bedroom door. "Sleeping. He...stayed up for me just in case i had a nightmare." wheatley nods. "So...you're leaving him alone?" star nods. "Yeah, he told me to." wheatley looks at the floor.
"It's been a bit since i've talked to you like this." star nods. "How you holding up star?" star smiles. "Good. or at least i am right now, so that's good." wheatley looks at her with confusion. " 'right now'? What does that mean?" star looks down. "I...i have a bit of a mental problem." wheatley nods.
"Like...brain damage?" star shakes her head. "No, no. mental illness. Two of em'. Depression and anxiety." wheatley looks confused. He looks up the terms.
Depression- a sadness longer than sadness usually is. Though it isn't always sadness. It can be anger too.
Anxiety- feeling of nervousness that isn't normal. It can affect life by making the person scared.
Wheatley looks down for a moment, the back at star. "...will...can you get better from them?" star looks to the side. "Hm...yes. But it never goes away." chell looks at wheatley. He seems a bit worried. Star smiles at him. "It's okay, i'll be fine. A few mental problems won't kill me."
He doesn't look at her for a moment, then smiles at her. "Okay." he seems less worried about her. Star pats the top of his core a little bit, then stands up. "Alrighty, i'm going to check on orion" wheatley stares for a moment, almost if asking her to stay. "I thought...he told you to leave you alone?" there's a bit of sadness in his voice.
"He did, but i like being with him." wheatley looks down. "Alright...talk to you later i guess.." star is quiet for a few moments. "Do you want me to stay?" wheatley nods. Star sits back down on the bed, next to him. Wheatley looks up at her.
"You're not upset that i am around orion more than you, are you?" wheatley looks away again. "It's been a while since we have even talked, it...it feels like you don't care about me.." star puts a hand on him. "I do care about you...orion's just special to me" wheatley looks at her, he looks like he's going to cry. "More special than me..?" star looks away for a moment. "...well….uh…" she looks back at him.
"You are special to me too, just in a friendship way, not a...love way" wheatley looks away. I knew it...
I'm not important to her...not even one bloody bit… he starts crying.
Star takes her hand off. Oh..i..i'm sorry..i..
"...i'm sorry.." she stands up. "I'll go" she says, then walks out of the room, going back to orion. Wheatley sobs. She really doesn't bloody care about me at all...it was all a lie...all a bloody lie..