Disclaimer: I have no affiliation to Criminal Minds or its characters. This is fiction pure and simple.

My awesome awesome reviewers;

Jenny crum, Nannily, Marinelvr84, Cacamilis, More Than Gold, Combatcrazy, Brandy and LoveforPenandDerek.

Maryhell – Thanks for the recommendation. I'm still trying to figure TWCS out. I really like the fact that they are recognized publishers. Any tips you may have will be a big help

Becks Gb – Wow! Thank you so much.

Guest – Whoever you are thank you. I'm glad you get it. I was going for 'raw and primal' I hope you are writing as well you really have the flair for it. It is terrible of me but I love that you were so 'fangirly' – more please.

Virgin!

Chapter 10

He was a mess. Reid tried to straighten out his tie but the wrinkles wouldn't come out. His shirt was smudged, he'd lost a button and he couldn't stop shaking. The darkness pressed in on him sending panic skittering through him. Dull pain throbbed at his throat and he examined it discovering that Morgan had broken skin as evidenced by the bloody stains. He felt marked, claimed by him.

He leaned back against the wall. Mind scattered in a million directions. Slamming his palm on his forehead didn't solve his immediate problem. He couldn't go back inside. Reid was clueless but not that clueless. You don't go back to the man you are dating looking like he was. Ravaged, bleeding and completely satisfied. Think. Phone. He pulled it out of his pocket and dialed.

"Reid? Where the hell are you?" JJ yelled. He could hear the thumping bass of the music in the background.

"I had to go home, stomach bug or something? Can you tell Alex I'm sorry?" Reid hated lying to her but it had to be done. Besides he'd never betray Morgan's trust by outing him like that.

JJ must have found a quieter spot because she lowered her voice. "Why didn't you call him?" Oh oh she wasn't drunk yet.

"It's embarrassing." He improvised. "He'd want to take care of me but it's too soon for him to see me at my worst."

"Don't want boyfie to see you shooting out both ends? I get it." Her throaty laugh trickled down the line. "If he witnesses all that and still comes back for more, you know he's a keeper"

"Just tell him ok. I've gotta go. Thank you." He quickly hang up on her before she got more graphic.

Reid jumped when a trash bag fell over coupled with vicious gnawing. It was probably a rat or a raccoon. This wasn't the best place to decide what to do about Morgan who'd left him. Again.

Reid spent the night tossing and turning. When the sun crept up over the horizon he was exhausted. He stumbled into his kitchen seeking comfort. Coffee. Coffee would help. He hated Sunday anyway. It was a Family day that was not kind to people with no families. Maybe someday soon that would change. From where he was standing things were certainly looking up.

The knock at his door at that very moment was a sign. He didn't believe in stuff like that but rushed to answer it anyway.

"Morgan" He said high and breathless.

"Hey. I hope I'm not interrupting anything." Morgan peeped over his shoulder as if looking for someone.

"No. No." Reid couldn't emphasize that fast or hard enough. "I'm alone."

"Ok. Can we talk?"

Reid stepped back pulling open the door, possibly his heart. Do not say that out loud. He chastised himself. Be normal. "What are you doing here?"

"I see that Christine is back from the shop." Morgan deflected. "How long before she starts to hunger for more blood?"

"Ha ha! My car is not trying to kill me."

Reid led the way back to the kitchen, getting another cup out while Morgan cleared a pile of papers from a chair before settling in. Reid joined him at the tiny table passing over the milk and sugar. The act of producing the perfect cup of coffee took on the concentration of a bomb diffusion. Each action was controlled and deliberate. Unable to put it off any longer they faced each other like they had not too long ago but too much had happened. Lines had blurred beyond recognition. They were no longer the men they once were.

"I – uh" "Listen…" They spoke at the same time.

Reid smiled awkward. "You first."

"I've been thinking about our arrangement." Their eyes met and held again each of them shielding a desperate longing. Reid dropped his gaze first. He should keep talking before you fall at his feet and beg him to keep you.

"It's not working."

Wait! What? This is not happening. Reid bit down hard on his trembling lip to stop the tears, nails dug hard into clammy palms. He'd spent all night at war with himself. So scared that he was falling in love with his best friend, terrified that he wasn't. Now this!

Reid was aware that Morgan was still talking, laying out his defense. His lips were moving as he gestured with his big hands. He knew those hands, those lips. Intimately. Reid heard the only thing he cared about. "You don't want me."

"It's not that. I'm confused. Everything's gotten so complicated. You are my best friend. We are practically brothers."

"Brothers?" Reid shrieked. "You don't feel like my brother. Unless we are in the middle of some messed up incestuous affair."

"This is what I'm talking about." Morgan shot up, toppling the chair that slammed to the floor. "We don't feel like us anymore. Last night we went too far, doing that outside while he was inside waiting for you? It was filthy and sordid. Not in the fun kind of way. This is not the relationship I want us to have."

"That's it! Isn't it?" Comprehension hit Reid right between the eyes.

"What?"

"You don't want to be in a relationship with a man."

"I don't want to be in a relationship with anyone. It's one thing to fuck like minks simply because we can, that's how friends with benefits is supposed to work – all this emotion is too much!" Morgan picked up the chair and sat back down. He took the pale hands in his interlocking their fingers. "Reid, its not you."

"Except it is." Reid focused on their hands as well. Dark complemented light. This could not be the last time Morgan ever touched him like this so he laid it all on the line. "I would give him up in heartbeat if its what you wanted."

Morgan was silent for too long. "Don't"

"Get out!"

"Reid?"

"Just go!" He snapped. "I need…I want to be alone." The separation was like a physical pain. One digit after another detached from his, slowly ripping him apart.

Long after Morgan had gone slamming the door behind him, Reid sat, head resting on the scarred table. He begged for the numbness not to end because then it would be real, permanent. It would be over.

The ringing of his phone dragged him from the brink and he ran to answer it. Maybe Morgan had changed his mind. But because life was having too much fun kicking him in the face, his caller ID read Alex. Could this day get worse?

He debated not answering it but guilt was a powerful motivator. "Alex, hi." He hoped his voice didn't sound as raw as he felt.

"Hey, can we talk?"

Everything in Reid seized up. As he'd recently learned those particular words strung together in that order didn't mean good news. "Right now?"

"Yeah. I'm right outside but I don't have a lot of time. Could you come down?"

Lie. Say you have a case and you have to go in right now. "Okay"

A sleek grey town car was parked outside his building and Alex got out as soon as he appeared. Reid approached him with dread that tripled when Alex didn't kiss him hello like he usually did. "What's up?"

"How are you feeling?"

Just like that the craziness of last night rushed to the forefront of his mind and he understood what Morgan meant by it being filthy and sordid. "I'm much better." He lied. "Must have been something I ate at work."

"That's good." Alex looked down toeing at the tarmac with his loafers. "I didn't want to leave without saying goodbye."

"Leave? You're leaving?" This day would not end.

"I'm having some trouble with a contractor on my building in Boston. I don't want to go but it's a good time for us to take a step back so you can figure out what you want."

"I – I – "

"This isn't an accusation. You are distracted, erratic. You ran out on our date without a word."

"I didn't feel well."

"But you felt well enough to call JJ?" In face of such damning evidence, Reid kept silent and hang his head. "I don't deserve to be treated like an afterthought so you have a decision to make."

"Hey, look at me." Alex pulled him into his arms, lifting his chin. "I'm crazy about you. I want you in every way that matters but we are not in the same place and I'm not going to take the bits and pieces you choose to dole out. So take your time and deal with your baggage. We'll talk when I get back."

When Alex leaned in it was the only kiss Reid had given that had nothing to do with Morgan. Running from him specifically. He felt the glimmer of what they could be if he let them.

"You keep kissing me like that and we just might make it."

Reid headed back to his apartment too tired to watch yet another man leave him.

He'd been dumped twice in one day.

Fucking Sundays!

AN: Yes, they were at work on a Saturday in the previous chapter. I don't think you get a lot of weekends off when you work in law enforcement.

I opened a LiveJounal account under the same name and one at Fanfiction Stop under Murderofminutes. Im still trying to find my way around both sites so bear with me.