Chapter 10

Wednesday, October 29

4:45 pm

When we got home for horseback riding, I went into the living room and saw Jason asleep on the couch – he's still sick – and saw Shane watching the Hannah Montana Best Of Both Worlds Concert in 3-D.

He kept going, "Whoa… whoa… oh my god."

And so I went over and was like, "Dude, what are you doing?"

Shane took off the 3-D glasses, turned to me, and said, "Do not watch this movie if you're as high as I am right now. Oh my god… That Hannah bitch is… all… whoa…"

Then he stumbled over to the stairs and tried to go up them. Instead he tripped about half way up and just laid there.

Then I turned my ex-girlfriend off of the TV.

And went upstairs.

Now here I am.

I'm gonna take a nap.

5:22 pm

We are officially as popular as Angelina Jolie.

I checked this website I always go to for gossip, and I saw a picture of me from today on the horses right on the front page! I looked at it and was like WHOA, THAT'S ME!

The caption said, "Lauren Grey and her youngest son, Nate Gray, go horseback riding while filming for their new TV show, airing Sunday, November 2nd on MTV at 7 pm."

People already know about the TV show. And about me.

How the hell do people find this out!?

I went to Perez Hilton's site, and even he was talking about me!

Well, he called me a "Little nugget with a pubic hair afro."

5:25 pm

Got like a trillion wall posts on Facebook saying, "Whoa, Nate, you're a celebrity!"

I made my status: "Nate Gray is a celebrity."

Then I got like 5 comments three seconds after I put it up.

Bitches be jeeaallooussss.

6:05 pm

Went downstairs for dinner.

We had crawfish.

Hmm… wonder where Mum got that.

9:57 pm

Decided to make a public blog.

Now that I'm a celebrity, I want to connect with my fans.

So one of the PPA's who's good with computers showed me how to make a website. And I made one. It is so kick ass. You guys wouldn't believe it. I put a link to it on Mum's Myspace, Facebook, and her official fan site. It's called nategray dot com. Original, eh?

Well it's sort of set up like Facebook.

(No, I didn't make it all by myself. We hired people to do that.)

But anyway, people can make like usernames and comment on all my blogs and pictures.

And I can put up pictures and posts and stuff! AHH!

Sorry, I'm really excited.

10:30 pm

Spent about half an hour just putting up a bunch of random photos of me. Good ones, though. Not like the one where I look mentally retarded.

That's a bad picture.

10:38 pm

Wow, news on the internet spreads fast. Already got forty users signed up on the new site.

In no time I'm gonna be like… Michael Buckley popular.

10:43 pm

It's odd, really. I'm getting a bunch of nice comments on all my Facebook photos from people who… I really don't like. And from people who tease me.

It's sad that people are trying to butter me up now that I'm a… Star.

Ha.

I learned from this one movie called Camp Rock that some people are only friends with the famous people so they can get free stuff. And that is SO true.

So these sad, lowly human life forms are attempting to be my friend. For the free stuff.

Little did they know, I've always had access to the free stuff. Like even before this whole reality TV show thing.

Umm, hello? My mum.

11:02 pm

Going to bed.

Being famous is hard work. I've responded to everyone who has commented on my new fan page.

OH MY GOD I HAVE A FAN PAGE!

Sorry, I'm still getting used to it.

Thursday, October 30

9:48 am

Tomorrow's Halloween!

And you know what that means…

CANDY!

10:00 am

Penelope, one of the PPA's, made me breakfast.

That little sucky upy skank.

Oh well, the toast was good.

And I guess she was just doing her job anyway.

10:13 am

Got like ten thousand notifications on Facebook and my website. I checked like five of them, but then said screw it and went down to the pond to be alone.

Well, to be with four thousand pounds of crawfish.

10:34 am

Went inside and saw Shane getting all frustrated and hot and sweaty. He was trying to get high off of grass. From outside.

He was like, "Holy shit, Nate, I ran out of weed and this damn grass from the garden doesn't do fucking shit!"

So I just shrugged and started to walk away, only he ran after me and said, "Nate, listen, you gotta go get me some weed."

I scoffed and said, "No way!"

He then dropped to his knees and hung onto my legs saying, "PLEASE! PLEEAASSSEEE!"

"Shane, what did I tell you about doing drugs?"

"I dunno. I was really high when you told me."

Then I kicked him off and ran over to the Playboy mansion.

He can't get me there. Hell, he can't leave the house or he'll get arrested.

Yup, only ten more days until he's a free bird.

11:20 pm

Mum called me into her "office" to help me pick who was going to be kicked off the show today.

The cameras follow us EVERYWHERE. There is no escaping them. I mean, I have to make sure I look good 27 \ 7 or they might get an embarrassing picture of me.

Like the one of me at the Christmas party.

12:46 pm

Found Jason in the bathroom puking.

I told him he needed to go to a doctor and he refused. He said, "Going to the doctor's is for wimps."

12:50 pm

I get hurt in the weirdest ways.

I just hit myself in the face with an iPod.

It was like one time, I was at my friend's house, and she had this poster of Elvis Costello on her wall, and I wanted a picture of it for my phone's background. Well I was bending over to get it, and my legs gave way and I fell down and hit my upper lip on her pink trashcan. And my lip started bleeding.

12:51 pm

Put my status on my website as "Just got hit in the face with an iPod."

A bunch of people commented within like 4 seconds saying "Lol! Good job, Nate!"

2:32 pm

Jess treated me to lunch.

Then he took me to the mall and bought me some clothes.

Then he went into my closet and took away all my clothes and put them in the dumpster.

He said, "There! I finally got rid of it!"

2:39 pm

Going to Target with Mum.

She told me we have to make a bunch of public appearances and get the attention of a lot of people. It's part of her comeback.

It's actually a good idea. Good publicity means people hear about you. And buy your CD's. And give us money. So we can pay for the PPA's.

3:04 pm

Got mobbed at Target. I signed an autograph.

You may be wondering how we're so popular. Well, my mum is almost as famous as Britney Bitch.

So ha. In your faces.

My mum's worth billions of dollars and yours isn't.

3:34 pm

I got a truancy letter in the mail.

What the fuck is that?

It said like if I don't go to school I'm gonna be put in jail.

So Mum started freaking out because she obviously doesn't want me to end up with house arrest like Shane (nor did she want the media to know I wasn't getting an education), so she talked to all the PPA's and one of them came up with this brilliant idea that maybe, just maybe, I should go back to my public school again.

We added her to the list of people to get kicked off tonight.

7:05 pm

We're kicking three more people off the show tonight.

We're kicking off toast girl, the guy who Jason barfed on today, and school woman.

10:20 pm

The ritual was extremely fun tonight.

I was glad to get rid of those creeps anyway.

We had like a disco ball. It was 80's themed.

We rented out this roller rink and so we all got to skate and stuff before we kicked people off. And we like had all the PPA's who were getting kicked off stand under this huge bucket of slime. And then we dumped it on them.

It. Was. Awesome.

11:46 pm

Shane just threw a full blown temper tantrum over a piece of cheese cake.

Like not even kidding.

He was on the floor, kicking his legs and screaming and crying because he wanted this one certain piece of cake.

And I eated it.

Shh…

Don't tell him.

I also eated his cookie yesterday.

A\N: Hey thanks for all the nice reviews! Keep them coming! I want to put up another chapter tomorrow night, but I'd like to get atleast 15 review before I do that. So reviews and I'll update within 24 hours! Thanksies.

Love,

Nate