My goodness! This must be the feeling of getting a full bucket of icy water right in your face. You meant it well, Garrett, but what now? Even Kevin isn't in the least better off. Theresa apparently seems to have sent you to the desert. Is there a way out of this? We really wouldn't like to see both of you going onto

The Road to Nowhere

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Garrett felt his knees going weak. He put back the phone that was beeping from the closed connection and sat down. It was like someone hit him full smash into the stomach. Kevin who witnessed the conversation couldn't hide his sadness. "Mom is angry, isn't she?"

Garrett nodded and very slowly, he replied: "She didn't let me explain. She thinks that all this was my idea and that I wanted to turn you against her." Kevin felt bad as he never did before "Oh no" he said sadly "that's simply not true. I love mom but she never wants to listen. If only I could do something about that. I'm so afraid Garrett, what will happen now?"

"I wish I knew" Garrett answered flatly. "Has she really been so busy with her new job lately?" Kevin nodded "It was annoying. Mom even worked late night at the weekends. Whenever I tried to talk to her, she didn't really listen. It was like..." Kevin tried to find good words, "...it was like a wall of glass was put between us. She said she had to go to Chicago, to be introduced to her new company and that she would go there frequently. To her, it seems that nothing else matters. One day she even meant that if this was going to be good, we might move there too."

This made Garrett frown. "And then there was the quarrel you talked about?" Kevin's words were low "Yes. I wanted to come here again. And believe me, Garrett, I wanted mom to come with. But she always turned me down. 'Some day' she said, 'be patient' and so on. Finally I got angry. I shouted at her, I know I shouldn't have. I said we all could be happy. Mom and you and I, we could be a good family. I even said her life was a mess."

He hesitated a moment "All the more, she kept reading my letters I got from someone and that's really gotten me upset! God, I know I shouldn't have run away, but I just couldn't stand it any more."

Garrett looked at the boy with respect. "Kevin, I'm going to tell you something now: Me too, I know what running away is like. I had a good wife. She was everything to me, I loved her and she loved me.

But then... she died four years ago, due to an accident." He bent his head and it was truly for Theresa's teaching Kevin good manners that he respectfully said: "I'm sorry for that" Garrett took it gratefully: "Thank you for your feelings" and after pausing for a moment, he went on: "I never felt so lost, so unhappy and at last so angry. I was angry with my world, angry with heaven, I kept asking 'why? Why me?' To put it with your words: My life too was a mess then. Those times really became the worst in my life."

He continued, very earnestly and not without sadness: "A year later, there came a day I was so down that I didn't want to go on. So I ran away, just like you, only much more so. I wanted to turn my back on everything that happened to me so far and didn't want to stay here any longer. My decision was eagerly set to never come back here again, to this place where I lost my beloved wife. Can you understand that?" The boy nodded and he replied with a low voice: "Yes, I think I can."

Again, Garrett interrupted as if to find the right way to continue. "But I guess even the most furious anger cannot endure forever. Finally, there came the moment when I could think clearly at least halfway again. And somehow, I felt I had to stop and try to understand:

Where in the world did I want to go at all? No doubt, you'll never find such a place with everlasting blue skies, where you could eternally feel like living on an island.

What would have changed if I continued my unhappy runaway trip on this road to nowhere? Nothing! Would it have made my wife become alive again? Of course not! Would I have felt better or satisfied with my acting? Hardly!

It only would have made endlessly sad the few people that really meant something to me.

But what can I say? In this very bitter moment, it was like something called me from heaven and told me that my life was to go on. I began to realize what a silly thing I was trying to do: I wanted to run away from trouble, from those dark days and...

I guess I just wanted to run away from myself.

The lesson I've learned thereafter is that it's no use running away from trouble, because some day they will catch up with you. Since then, at least I have not been angry with heaven any more. I knew I had to go on, but to be honest, many times since then this was the hardest thing for me to do. I'm far from being perfect, Kevin. I struggled along and hit the ground more than once, you know. But at least I can say now, I've always been trying to get back up again and make the best out of it.

Now you have run away from home, nothing can make that undone. You have to go back in a few days but till then, we'll try to make the best out of it, okay?

There was silence for a while but then, for the first time this evening, a smile appeared on Kevin's lips. "Okay. While I never understood why my real father wanted to run away, I'm glad that you didn't and when I go home, I'll apologize to mom. I promise not to do it again!"

At last, Garrett sounded somewhat positive: "Tomorrow we'll see what we can do: Maybe you can help me a little with the shop. And there may be also something else for you to do, since you're here in Wilmington. Probably wouldn't be a bad thing."

Since Garrett didn't continue, Kevin got curious. "What do you mean?"

Garrett chose his words very carefully: "First of all, Kevin, may I ask you a fairly personal question?"

The boy was not used to this kind of politeness. Since Garrett didn't scold him and showed quite a lot of understanding he could however, see no reason to object. He replied quite astonished: "Yes, of course"

Looking right into the boy's eyes, Garrett went on: "I really don't want to dig in your private matters, but you mentioned that your mother red a few of your letters you got from someone. Is there any chance that this someone might be a girl called Annie?"

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Well, well, Garrett, do you know something we don't? Even so, we'd rather take a look after Theresa. Has she come to her senses after all or does she eventually need some advice for a stubborn head?

To be continued.