Every Breath
By Serena
A/N: Thank you again for all of your kind comments!!! I'm so sorry it took me so long to update - this chapter gave me some problems - also, I had to update many of my other stories. Thank you so much for waiting. :) Love you all!!
I have a few drawings of Spock and Uhura up on DeviantArt. If you'd like to see, just go to my profile here and scroll down until you see the link for my deviantart website. :) I'd love feedback.
Chapter Ten: Breathe
Their hands dangled at their sides. At times, they barely brushed up against each other. When they did, both felt a strong jolt run through their arm and into their very cores. Their fingers tingled. His flexed out, and hers curled in, not quite in shyness, but hesitation.
Uhura hoped Spock couldn't see her deep blush, but when she dared to cast a side glance at him, he wasn't even looking at her. His jaw was oddly tight, and his whole posture was unnaturally tense. Had she done something wrong? She hadn't meant to touch him in such a familiar way. From what she'd heard, Vulcans' hands were extremely sensitive.
After an awkward silence, she cautiously asked, "Is everything all right, Spock?"
Spock nodded with a short jerk of his head.
When he didn't speak, Uhura let out a small, soundless sigh and looked away. Sunset at the Golden Gate bridge was stunning, but Uhura didn't enjoy the view as much as she normally would have. Her thoughts were far too preoccupied on the grim Vulcan strolling stiffly beside her. She wanted to say something else, but obviously, he wasn't in the mood for speaking at the moment.
Funny how just a small touch could change things so drastically.
After a lengthy silence, Uhura frowned and turned to Spock. "Have I said or done something to offend you, Spock?" she demanded.
Spock stopped and looked at her. His dark eyes betrayed only a hint of surprise. He relaxed slightly. "No, of course not, Nyota."
"Then why do you suddenly refuse to speak with me?"
"I..." He paused, checked himself. "Forgive me, Nyota. I am afraid I have not been the best of company."
"Yes, you have," objected Nyota. "I just wondered why you're suddenly so quiet."
"I have nothing to say at the present time."
She shook her head. No more silence. "You're lying, Spock."
His eyes widened fractionally. Uhura knew she was being bold, but no one ever increased connection between man and woman by being timid and quiet.
Uhura inhaled, exhaled, and reached out, placing a hand on his arm. His skin felt warm even under the fabric of his shirt. "Spock..." she said softly, giving him a small smile, "I think I know you well enough to know when something is bothering you."
Spock stared at her unflinching for a long minute. Finally, he relaxed fully, and his dark eyes softened. "You are very perceptive, Nyota."
"My parents always told me curiosity killed the cat," she said, reddening.
"But I have heard that cats have more than one life," Spock said calmly. But his eyes flickered with amusement, and she smiled at his attempt at humor.
"Yes," she said, continuing to stroll. "That may be so." This time, the silence was not awkward at all, and Uhura found herself greatly enjoying this rare moment of peace with the man that she...
Well, what did she feel for this man? She shot him a quick glance and blushed. It most certainly wasn't just simple acquaintances. Or just a teacher/assistant relationship. Not even just friendship. No. It was more than that. It was a growing bond, emotional, mental, and physical. A meeting of the minds... but so much more.
Uhura suddenly felt an odd sense of forever walking contentedly beside this Vulcan outcast.
"What you think you'll be doing?" she asked quietly. When he looked at her in question, she clarified: "I mean... were you planning on being a professor as a definite career?"
Spock shook his head slightly. "Indeed, no." Folding his hands behind his back, he said, "I have been asked to be first officer on the starship Enterprise."
Uhura beamed. "That's amazing! 'Starfleet's wonder', I've heard it called. It's supposed to be the grandest flagship of the fleet."
He nodded. "So I've heard."
"Are you looking forward to it?"
"In some ways," he said.
"What do you mean by that?" she asked, regarding him curiously.
He paused and gazed out at the bridge. "I am... conflicted."
"About?"
He looked at her with such dark eyes that she forgot to breathe. "Many things. But I'm afraid I was never good at 'spilling out my emotions' as I've heard you humans say it."
Uhura smiled in understanding. "I never wanted you to, Spock. I'm afraid I'm too outspoken sometimes." She gave him a sheepish smile.
Spock suddenly reached up a hand and touched her cheek gently. She inhaled sharply but didn't move. She was tempted to lean into his touch, but she didn't want to push her luck and remained perfectly still.
"Do not be ashamed of your boldness," he said quietly. Something stirred in his dark eyes. "Fortune favors the bold."
Uhura's lips parted in amazement and wonder. She didn't trust herself enough to speak. She didn't even realize she wasn't breathing until Spock's eyes grew even warmer.
"Breathe, Nyota," he murmured. "Breathe."
Breathe, Nyota. Breathe.
Her heart pounded wildly as she ducked out of a Romulan soldier's hold and kicked him in the stomach. She spun around and sucker-punched another in the face. She was breathing heavily, and her ears buzzed. In the background, she heard Salran and Ayel furiously shouting - at her or at each other, she didn't know. Unfortunately, Salran hadn't stayed down, but the shock of her hitting him had given her the opportunity to break free and run.
She didn't get far before the soldiers had caught up with her. She barely missed several shots aimed at her, but she couldn't outrun all of them. She could only hope that Spock would give her the mental, physical, and emotional strength to defeat them. There were only five of them, but all of them were twice her size and normal strength. After all, Romulans were a distant relation to Vulcans and just as strong.
But Uhura had Spock.
Breathe, Nyota, she could hear his voice saying from that powerful memory. Breathe.
She whirled around when a strong hand grabbed her arm and paled when she saw that it was an infuritated Salran. He yanked her to him and hissed in her ear: "I have been patient enough. I am finished with waiting."
Uhura felt a jolt of panic, but she decided to use a last ditch effort to get rid of him. Leaning up close to him, she whispered, "Me, too." And she pressed her lips to his. Salran started in shock, but she made sure he didn't pull back. Instead, she raised her arms around his neck, which caused his grip to loosen and slide down her back.
Then, she heard Ayel shout behind her.
And, deep inside her, everything broke loose. A furious, emotional roar - one that was most definitely not hers - that blossomed in her head, her heart, and caused her entire body to tingle - shook her into action.
She lifted up her knee and rammed it right into his groin. He choked, groaned, and stumbled back, uttering an alien curse. Uhura spat out his sick taste from her mouth and growled, "Kiss this, you psycho." And she drew her fist back and smashed it into his face as hard as she possibly could. Salran slumped to the ground; but she didn't wait to see if he was unconscious - she took off up the dark, rocky hill, ignoring the cries of fury behind her. A shot blared right by her ear, and she ducked.
Breathe, Nyota. Breathe. She ran as hard as she could up the small hill and hoped that she could find some cover or a weapon to defend herself.
Another shot rang out, and she ducked again. But when she felt a white-hot pain jolting her forearm, she let out a pained cry and slumped forward, stumbling on the rocky terrain.
Spock!
She was immediately rewarded with a warm, soothing, yet worried burst of emotions seeping into her body. She let out a rasping breath and covered her bleeding arm with her hand, letting out a hiss when she did so. She flinched from an unexpectedly hot anger burning into her core and tried to breathe more calmly. He felt her pain. Felt it just as fiercely, if not more so, than she did. And he wasn't too happy about it.
I'll be all right, she tried to convey through projected reassuring feelings. I'll be all right. Just breathe. Breathe.
The anger died down but didn't completely go away. Instead, a warm, familiar emotion overcame that golden fury, one that caused tears to come to her eyes.
"I know," she gasped out, stumbling down the hill. "I love you, too." She swiped her hand across her face and blinked, looking around at her surroundings. She didn't stop running, knowing that Ayel wouldn't be far behind. He was probably getting into his ship right now. The landscape surrounding her was unfortunately bleak, however. It was covered in large, jagged rocks, with a few black trees dotting the landscape. Not too far away, she saw buildings - a small town. Maybe she could seek shelter there. Maybe.
Breathe, Nyota. Breathe.
But her situation looked rather bleak. She was in the middle of Romulan territory.
This wasn't good.
Kirk and the rest of the crew stared at the panting Spock. The Vulcan was furious, anyone could see. His entire body shook, his lips were curled back into a snarl. But what disturbed Kirk most were the Vulcan's eyes.
Black. Dangerously black. Filled with the most hatred and rage that Kirk had ever seen before.
It was then, seeing those deadly eyes, that Kirk knew something was very, very wrong.
Kirk didn't look at a speechless Jameson when he said, "I'll have to call you back, Admiral. End transmission." The viewscreen blinked to black as Jameson gaped at Spock.
The entire bridge was completely quiet, watching Kirk walk up to Spock and say much too calmly, "We need to talk."
Spock's jaw tightened. He was sweating, and his lips trembled along with the rest of his body. He nodded jerkily and followed Kirk out of the bridge.
Alastar broke the awkward silence by asking, "Is he going to be all right?"
Sulu frowned and watched the doors close behind Kirk and Spock. "Not without her," he murmured.
Spock followed Kirk into his ready room, already knowing what would take place in this conversation. He folded his arms behind his back stiffly as Kirk started to pace the room, rubbing his chin.
"All right, Spock," said Kirk, "I've given you a lot of leeway here, but at some point, you're going to have to give me some answers."
Spock didn't reply.
"Spock," said Kirk forcefully. "I need you to tell me what's going on. As your friend, I need to know what's going on with you."
"Nothing is going on with me," Spock said tersely.
"That's b.s. and we both know it," Kirk snapped. "Last time I checked, Vulcans don't show their emotions. And what you've been doing the past few days have been anything but concealing your emotions, Spock. Lashing out at the Regent. Me. The Admiral. Everyone! What is wrong? Just tell me - maybe I can do something to help."
"You don't understand, Jim!" Spock growled, grabbing Kirk's forearms and shaking him. Kirk stared at him in shock; and after a moment, Spock paled and released him, drawing back. "Forgive me. Forgive me," he breathed in horror.
"Spock," said Kirk in a low voice, "What is going on?"
Spock's face contorted into a pained expression. This was private. Too private to discuss. "I... I cannot tell you, Jim."
"Can't?" said Kirk edgily. "Or won't? Spock, you're killing yourself. Look at you! What the hell is going on with you? You can trust me!"
Spock sank back into a chair and rubbed his temples. "It... it is something we do not discuss. Ever."
"Well, sorry, buddy, but you're going to discuss it. Now."
Spock looked down; and not since he'd attacked Kirk had the Captain seen him look so ashamed of himself. After a long pause, Spock inhaled, exhaled deeply, and muttered, "I am experiencing pon-farr."
Kirk stared at him blankly. "You lost me."
TBC...
It just isn't Spock's day, is it? Really isn't Uhura's either... hmm. They both need a hug. Anyone wanna volunteer? :)
OK, it's that time - the time you've been waiting for: the ARAGORN QUOTE OF THE DAY (TM)!
"I thought I had strayed into a dream."
OOh, romantic scene! Fitting, hm? :)
I hoped you enjoyed your ARAGORN QUOTE OF THE DAY (TM). Brought you by yours truly. :)
- Serena