A/N- OK, so this is a loooooooooooooooooong chapter, but it's VERY important to the plot! Don't worry, smut-hunters, there's more on the way in the next chapters ;)

Chapter 10- The Woods

Two Months Ago

The first two days after waking from her ordeal, Sarah had laid in bed, completely distraught and bereft. For her part, Myriamsa seemed to know she wanted to be left alone, and so she did. Sarah tossed and turned, gently to avoid another painful spell attacking her brain, settling delicately into the mattress to soothe the healing ache at the apex of her legs. Every once in a while, Myriamsa would bring in a clay bowl full of some stew, but Sarah wouldn't touch it. A few hours later, Myriamsa would reappear to retrieve it, thankfully never saying a word about her lack of appetite. Sarah cried without sound, tears rolling down her face, staring at the ceiling. Wondering who else she had misjudged. Wondering horrified that, if she had miscomprehended Rasha's true intentions so poorly, what else had she missed? Even worse, how badly had Rasha managed to damage the trust between her and Jareth in Sarah's absence? Sarah worked diligently to block the face of her attacker from her thoughts, to forget his hot, stale breath on her skin, his rough and calloused hands restraining her limbs so violently. She couldn't even bring herself to think of the baby that Myriamsa had told her about. In her waking moments, she mostly succeeded, but when she slipped into sleep, all those abhorrent memories and more invaded her dreams, and Sarah was powerless to stop them. Once, the claws of her nightmares had gripped her so fiercely and with such vividness that she had awoken to Myriamsa shaking her shoulders, telling her sternly to wake up, it was just a dream. Sarah had only cried more.

After a third day of this, Myriamsa lost her patience.

Sarah was jarred awake to the sound of curtains being flung open, and the bright, unforgiving light of day flooded the room. Sarah covered her eyes tightly to shield them from the assault. When she dared to lower her hands and crack her eyes open tentatively, Myriamsa was standing at the foot of the bed, her arms crossed, a flinty, determined look on her face.

"Enough," she proclaimed, "You've given that monster enough of your time. No more." Myriamsa walked forward and snapped the blankets off of Sarah's body, and Sarah quickly brought her knees up to ward off the sudden exposure to the damp coldness of the room. She continued,

"You will get up. You will bathe because you stink. You will eat because your baby needs you to," here she leaned into Sarah's face closely, pure annoyance on her face, "and you will stop feeling sorry for yourself."

Sarah could only stare at her. How dare she. How dare she?! Sarah sat up, fueled by her rage at this cold woman's indifference.

"How can you speak to me that way?! You saw what I went through! You saw what that- that- horrible man did to me! How can you be so uncaring?! How can you be so CRUEL?!" Sarah shrieked, apoplectic with anger. Couldn't she plainly see how she was suffering?

Myriamsa was unmoved by her outburst. It only seemed to steel her resolve further.

"Yes, I saw it. Not only that, I lived it." Myriamsa stood to her full height, daring Sarah to argue further.

Sarah gawked openly. It had never occurred to her that a woman so strong as her could ever have been so helpless. Sarah didn't know how to respond to that, but didn't have to ponder it long as Myriamsa continued.

"Four years. Four years I lived under the fist of my husband. A heartless, fat bastard whom my father saddled me to the first chance he could. Loved the drink. Loved to fight. Loved it when I fought back." Myriamsa sat on the foot of the bed, but sat with her full height and appeared every bit as fearless as always.

"Yes, I moped around at first. Wondered how my father could do that to me. Wondered how a man so drunk all the time and so fat could cause so much pain, could love the scream of a woman so much. Know what good it did me? None. No matter how much I sulked, I was still married to him, he still drank too much, he still beat me, and he still raped me almost every night." Here, Myriamsa looked away from Sarah towards the dancing flames in the fireplace, like the memories of her story were filling the room even as she spoke. She stared silently for a moment, before continuing more softly,

"I wondered if anyone would come to save me. Took me an embarrassingly long time to figure out that no one ever would. Told you these townspeople- these men- had no use for things that they can't bend to their will," here Myriamsa's gaze shot back to Sarah with such ferocity that Sarah had to fight the urge to shrink down into the mattress.

"That applies to women especially." She stood once again, coming closer to where Sarah still laid in the bed.

"No one can undo what's happened, including you. The only thing you can do- the only thing to do- is to accept it as best you can and move on."

Myriamsa took Sarah's chin in her palm once more.

"You want to fuck him over for what he's done to you? Going on with your life like he never even existed is the best way to do it."

Sarah felt more tears gathering. Myriamsa's expression softened ever so slightly. She followed a bit more gently, "And stop crying."

Sarah pulled her face from Myriamsa's hand and looked down to her lap.

"I don't want to fuck him over," she said softly, trying to keep the quiver from her voice, "I just want to forget."

"That's not ever going to happen. It will be with you. Always." Myriamsa leaned forward to pat Sarah's belly gently. "Especially now."

Sarah looked at the woman's hand, weathered with age, resting on her abdomen. Just another of the myriad of crises piling up in her life.

"How can you know already that I'm pregnant?" Sarah asked. She didn't want to talk about it. Myriamsa didn't push her to, knowing a subject change when she heard one.

"I asked you if you knew where you were, who I was." Myriamsa withdrew her hand and stood, walking across the room to pull back the drape.

"It's time you get up and find out." Myriamsa walked out of the room, clearly expecting Sarah to follow her. As she worked her way out of the bed and tried her feet on the floor, Sarah heard her mutter under her breath, "And finally wash that stink off."

OoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOo

Sarah took a deep breath before dunking her head under the bracing cold of the stream. After glaring at Sarah to finish a bowl of stew in a small kitchen, Myriamsa had thrown a thick brown shawl around Sarah's shoulders and shepherded her outside through the woods towards a small stream a 10 minute walk from her hut. She had then yanked the shawl and the thin white undergown off of Sarah's body and pushed her in, ignoring her yelps of protest and her screech when her body hit the cold water. As Sarah had shivered violently and scowled, Myriamsa had pointedly neglected her outrage and plopped down on the bank a few steps away, dunking Sarah's clothing in the stream to begin washing it.

"And scrub good," was all she said, not even glancing up from her new task, "you smell awful."

Sarah quickly submerged herself in the freezing stream and washed herself as best she could before quickly running out of the water and into the nearest beam of sunlight that cut through the trees, craving desperately any bit of warmth. Sarah felt something hit her back, and turned to see that Myriamsa had thrown her the shawl.

"Put that on or you'll freeze to death." Sarah saw that she had already finished with her undergown and had started on some additional clothing she had brought with her in a brown, woven basket. Sarah picked up the shawl gratefully and wrapped it around her body, cherishing the feel of the soft cloth as it absorbed the remaining water droplets on her skin. She stood there for a moment, watching Myriamsa work, until the older woman had frozen and looked up suddenly. Sarah tensed, wondering if she had heard or sensed an intruder, until she turned to Sarah with an incredulous look on her face.

"Are your legs broken? Get over here and help me."

Sarah was flabbergasted for a moment. No matter the manual labor she had been used to in her world, being queen in Jareth's for the past two years had gotten her used to a certain quality of life that most definitely did not include laundry. Sarah shook off the feeling, knowing she owed this woman quite a bit, possibly including her life, and walked towards the bank where Myriamsa sat. She watched the woman work for a few moments, then picked up a pair of brown leggings and began mimicking Myriamsa's technique. They worked in silence for some minutes, until Sarah curiosity could no longer be contained.

"How do you know I'm pregnant?"

Myriamsa didn't look up from her work, nor did she respond. Sarah wasn't sure she had heard her, but when she inhaled to speak again, Myriamsa cut her off.

"I heard you." She looked up from her scrubbing into the woods across the stream for a moment, then back to her work before continuing,

"This land isn't good for farming. I told you that. But it is good land. Look around you."

Sarah paused her cleaning and did as she asked. It was indeed beautiful. Thick trees created a vast, full forest landscape, their foliage lush and green, reaching out towards one another to make a stunning canopy. Golden streams of sunlight filtered lazily through the leaves, spilling over flawless green grass that was dotted with fallen leaves and delicate wildflowers. Strong grey river rocks dotted the banks of the brook as it babbled gently through the woods. Further away in every direction were bushes dotted with cheery-colored berries. Somewhere overhead Sarah heard the flutter of wings. Birds chirped. Some small animal chattered in the brush. The more Sarah studied the surrounding land, the more she could feel a calm warmth seep in through the shawl and past her skin, into her muscles and bones. Sarah was at first startled by the sensation, but sensing no harm, focused on it further, noticing as it rolled through her body from her fingertips inwards, playing gently over her nerves before returning the way it came, leaving Sarah with a feeling she couldn't quite describe. The closest she could come was labeling it a kind of intense peace.

"Feel it, don't you?" Myriamsa interrupted her reverie. Sarah could only nod, afraid that speaking would banish the sensations.

"Local legend spoke of a fountain of energy out here that if found would kill a person dead, or some such nonsense. When I decided to leave my husband, I came out here because no one bothered the woods, either afraid of the legend or not willing to fight through the thickness of the forest. I didn't really care either way, as long as that jackass left me alone." Here Myriamsa snorted, clearly still irritated at the mention of her husband.

"I don't really know what I was expecting, but what I found wasn't it. I wandered through the woods for days, living off whatever food I could forage, looking for a place to set up shelter," she chuckled wryly, "it's a wonder I didn't die. Then I found that hut. It was in shit shape, but it was better than starting from scratch. No one was living there, and hadn't been for a very long time." Here she threw her current article of clothing against a large stone next to her, before grabbing another and repeating the process.

"I thought at first some crazy person had lived there. After I cleaned it up, repaired the roof, made it livable, I saw that the former tenant had written things. A lot of things. Some of it was useful, about herbs and such," Myriamsa looked off in the distance again briefly, before looking back down, "never anything about themselves though. Pity. Then I found they had written some crackpot bunk about an energy well, living in and through the land, malleable with concentration blah blah blah." Myriamsa looked up at Sarah with deadly seriousness,

"I'll be perfectly honest, I thought it was all horseshit. Threw those books up in the rafters and forgot all about them."

Myriamsa looked back down at her laundry. "Didn't put any stock into it until I started to notice things. Strange things. I'd run out of herbs for healing, I'd find some the next day while foraging. I'd worry about having enough meat, an animal would find its way into one of my snares. I'd notice the roof needed rethatching, I'd find a tree felled in the woods with just enough branches for my purposes. Any time I needed something, it found its way to me."

Sarah studied her with curiosity, eager to know where she was going with her story.

"Made me rethink about those writings being horseshit after all. So I took them down and started reading through them more seriously." She stood to stretch her back, then sat again, ignoring Sarah's impatient expression.

"Best I can explain, this place does have an energy. It's not a well or a fountain, but a living thing, like you and I. It doesn't take a shape, it isn't an entity, it simply exists." Here Myriamsa's brow furrowed, searching for words.

"See that tree?" She gestured to one across the stream, with a mighty trunk and thick, full branches that reached skyward. "It needs water and light to merely survive, to continue without withering. But with the leaves that die and fall and turn to soil around its trunk, with the droppings left by animals, with the winds of the season that blow new pollens in, it doesn't just survive; it thrives. It takes the things around it provided by the creatures that happen by and it makes itself into something more."

Myriamsa turned to face Sarah. "Just as you by yourself are a woman. But when your husband is within you, you cease being individuals and become one. With that child growing inside you, you have become a mother. You've taken the things that come into your orbit and make more with them and are made more because of them."

Myriamsa gathered a garment into her hands and resumed scrubbing, the most important part of her lesson over.

"And so it went for me. I live in this forest. I forage its fruits, I tend its plants, I harvest its herbs. This energy exists within me and around me and I am made more because of it, just as this forest is changed and shaped by my living here. We don't just survive; we work together and we flourish. Perhaps because we know each other so well, or maybe I've just been living in it too long, I can sense changes to it, even small ones."

Myriamsa paused and looked at Sarah once more, that unique twinge of sympathy again.

"I could sense when you and your friend were here. I could feel the violence and destruction of that man. I could sense the damage that had been done to you." She nodded down to Sarah's belly, "And I could feel when new life took root."

Sarah instinctively placed a protective hand over her womb, already intensely attached to the life growing within her. Myriamsa stood, throwing the damp, clean clothes over the brown basket and picking up to head back to the hut. Sarah glanced down at her handiwork. It wasn't exactly clean, but it was better than it had been to start with. Sarah stood, gripping the shawl around her tighter, and followed Myriamsa as she walked with purpose through the woods.

"I sensed the king, too." Myriamsa stated, focused on the path ahead of her, "Came crashing into my woods with 10 guards in tow; trampled some goldenseal I had growing. Searching for someone, figured it was you. Didn't know if he was friend or foe to you, so I let you rest and kept you hidden." Myriamsa looked back at Sarah, who had a shocked expression on her face. She scoffed,

"Yes, he came looking for you, being led by the nose by your 'friend'. All they found was that man. Shackled him up, rooted around for you a bit more, then left." Myriamsa's gaze sharpened with a touch of recrimination,

"Of course, I wasn't the only one keeping things hidden, was I?"

Sarah looked at her in confusion until her meaning came through.

"Yes, I know I didn't tell you I was queen. To be honest, I had more pressing things on my mind." An image of the man's old, unshorn face came unbidden into her mind's eye, and she pushed past and ahead of Myriamsa, as if she could push past the image in the same way. Myriamsa followed and then fell into step beside her.

"That's not what I meant."

Sarah stopped, and looked at her quizzically. "I don't know what you mean."

Myriamsa stared, her face set in concentration. "You're not just the queen," she stated finally, then narrowed her eyes, "there's something...else...about you."

Sarah immediately understood, but she tried to hide the realization from her expression. Myriamsa caught it anyway.

"Yes, something else about you, indeed." A smug smile on her face. Sarah felt an anxious fear creep into her chest. Jareth had warned her not to reveal her true origin to anyone in order to avoid outrage over the king marrying a foreign non-noblewoman, concocting a lineage for her that was vague but believable enough to be acceptable for the members of his court. She had confided the truth in Rasha to ease some of the isolation she had felt, so alone in this realm, but then look how that had turned out- Rasha had used it against her in a particularly cruel way. Sarah wasn't about to make the same mistake twice.

"You can't hide it- I already know you're not of this earth." Myriamsa said flatly, as if reading her mind. Sarah couldn't hide the horror on her face. Myriamsa continued,

"And I don't care. You think you're the first non-Fae to wander into these woods?" She stated nonchalantly. Myriamsa turned to continue her walk back to the hut. Sarah looked incredulously after her, before running to catch up with her and grasping her by the shoulder to turn her to face her.

"What do you mean?" Sarah said quickly.

Myriamsa looked at her, puzzled. "I mean," she began, annoyance clear in her voice, "what I said. That you aren't the first non-Fae to make it to these woods. They've come stumbling through after happening upon this place through some crack or other, crying like lost sheep, begging to go home-"

"And they can get back?" Sarah asked, cutting her off.

Understanding finally dawned on Myriamsa's face.

"No." Myriamsa said shortly, but there was no fooling Sarah.

"They can. I can see it in your face," Sarah replied.

"That's not what I mean," she snapped. "I mean, that you can't go back in your shape. Not with the baby."

Sarah immediately looked crestfallen. So close, only to have it snatched away…

"Why would you even want to go back?" Myriamsa peered at her, genuinely curious. "Don't you have everything you could ever want? Aren't you queen?"

"YES I AM AND LOOKED WHAT THAT GOT ME!" Sarah exploded. She was so tired of everyone, including Jareth, thinking she couldn't possibly want more than being queen.

"My husband thinks I'm a ungrateful brat for wanting to go back to that poverty and hell I came from, even for a day, and the ONE person I thought I could trust to help me with it turned out to be no better than the dozens of back-stabbing courtesans who worked TIRELESSLY to rip that stupid crown off my head! I DON'T EVEN WANT IT! I just want…I just..." Sarah felt more tears welling, her throat closing up, thick with emotion. She held her breath, squinting her eyes shut, ruthlessly pushing it down. After a moment, she continued, feeling exhausted by the whole ordeal,

"I just want to go home. Just for a day. I miss what I had there more than I ever thought I would. Some parts of it were pure torture, but...other parts of it were wonderful, and those parts gave me strength. My family is dead and gone, but I still miss them. I want to be able to walk where they walked, visit where we visited, see where they've been laid to rest, so…" a sob snuck by and tears fell from her eyes, before she added in a whisper, "so I don't forget them. I want to go back to that place because even though it was horrible, I knew who I was. What to expect. I knew what I stood for because I knew what I would not be knocked down by. I thought then I had nothing. And then Jareth came, and he offered me more. And I never thought I would want to go back to what was, but..."

Sarah crouched to the ground and sat, feeling defeated, covering her head with her arms. How could she begin to put what she was feeling into words?

Myriamsa sat down beside her, a knowing look in her eye, and patted Sarah on the back. Sarah kept her head hidden.

"You know," she said softly, understanding the frailty of the moment, "there were more than a few times when I first came here that I turned around. Was convinced I should go back to my husband. Sure, he was worthless, but I had survived that far, I figured. At least I knew what the next day would bring, even if what it brought was more hell. I didn't know what laid ahead of me in these woods. And that terrified me. Just as the unknown terrifies you."

Myriamsa took Sarah's hand in her own, and looked out towards the woods again. It occurred to Sarah she was feeling, or communicating, or in some way accessing the warm energy that pulsed strangely through this place when she did that. She was silent for several moments. Still looking out, she said to Sarah,

"I hated every minute with that horrible man. But he made me into who I am now. Tough. I take shit from no one who isn't fit to give it to me."

She finally turned toward Sarah, and looked her in the eye.

"I think I know how to help you."