The Topology of Compassion

Disclaimer: Please see Chapter 1 for full disclaimer.

Chapter 10: Affinity

The feeling of confidence and of control swelled within Mello's being with the realization settling into his mind that he had seized a reliable contact within the Mafia organization. With an eye into their doings, perhaps things were finally set to work in his favor. Perhaps he was back in control of his own case.

Tension was laid upon his shoulders like a dead weight the moment he stepped foot within the investigation room once more. He couldn't remember the space feeling such a way before he'd left merely a few moments ago.

Near's abysmal eyes immediately looked over to the blonde, watching his every minute movement, and judging everything about him through his body language alone within the span of merely a precious few seconds. Mello's own gaze responded immediately by hardening back at him, "What?" He shot, the feeling of being scrutinized under those steel colored eyes working to suck any positivity to his mood back out of him.

"Who did you get this time?" Near questioned, his form remaining motionless.

That feeling of being analyzed, of Near sliding into his mind and reading each and every single one of his thoughts sent an icy vibration down his spine to echo through his extremities. "What are you going on about?"

Mello could practically see any reserves of will quickly depleting within the younger detective as he fought back an instantaneous urge to roll his eyes. "You're new contact, obviously. You walk out of here claiming to have a call to make with everything about your demeanor seeming so assured. It's practically arrogance, but also historically has always been your calling card to having a plan." Near expounded, inadvertently forming words to the question locked within Mello's mind: 'how?'

Though immediately he shook the thought from his mind. If they were going to talk history then he shouldn't have been surprised by Near's quick reasoning abilities. Near was always so… out-right, no, blunt about those observations. Near harbored the ability to see through the entire world to all of its most deeply held secrets, and yet he possessed absolutely no filter regarding what was fitting to expound to everyone and what was not. What did that say about him, and about his own character? Whatever it did, it continued to piss Mello off.

"I have people within that organization that'd still work for me, and do what I tell them, but the one I called in isn't like that. No money required, and absolutely no doubt on loyalty."

Near's look narrowed skeptically on the blonde as he moved back through the room to retake the seat he'd previously been occupying. "Your blind sense of faith in others has nearly gotten you killed before, Mello." Something lurked beneath Near's words, something selfish that seemed to say, 'Don't do anything risky. Not everyone has your ill-timed luck.'

Mello merely shrugged, "What it comes down to is this: I'm not the only one who wants the Mafia taken out. There are plenty of people stuck within the system who are looking for revenge but aren't necessarily in a place to extract it. She just happens to be one of those people." His statement, as expected, only warranted a more questioning gaze from Near.

"She?"

The line of doubt nestled within his tone brought a small smirk to Mello's face, "Yes, she. That immediate doubt is exactly what we're going to use to our advantage; it'll be one of our greatest assets."

Near's look never faltered a moment in the face of Mello's unwavering confidence, "So what do you intend to do, then?" The doubt Mello had called out remained set within his words, as though staking it as rightfully placed.

Mello's fingers moved up to thread through the locks of his hair while he quickly considered over the options available to not only himself, but to her as well. What it came down to was with River's assistance in place, the sequence of events remained almost entirely the same. "I'll contact her again from something more secure than just my phone and layout the information she'll need to acquire. Knowing the way she works, it shouldn't take too long to hear back."

Near turned a slightly away from him, "Allow me to reiterate, Mello, your willingness to rely on the actions of one person is astoundingly obtuse for someone of your intelligence."

Mello's look firmly narrowed on his rival, reading between the lines to the unspoken message being conveyed. Near had previously said that working with contacts was not an option; especially ones that required bribing, and though River was willing to work for free there still existed the same potential risks involved with that level of trust.

"Get over it." Mello declared, "Contacts are the only option we have to work with, unless you're willing to go so far as to send out your precious second in command. Otherwise, you're just going to have to deal with it."

From the other side of the room Mello could see the way Near's chest deflated with a sigh, "Yes, well I suppose having to take these sorts of risks is partially what you deserve for getting thrown out of the Mafia." Large, desolate gray eyes shifted quickly from the cards being stacked upon the table in front of him back over to Mello, and though Mello allowed himself to entirely observe the moment, catching Near in the act of letting his veiled curiosity show, still no words fell from between the detective's lips. There was only the sense of wonder which permeated his stare.

Mello's breathing became stifled within his chest, reading into Near well enough to know what the question was that plagued his mind with an intensity powerful enough to bring symptoms up to the surface. 'Why did you get kicked out? Why did you leave? Which of the two was it?'

The words to answer Near remained locked with the air in his chest, unable to be released to cross the vast space between them; unable to bridge the channel of everything else laying unspoken around them. Perhaps that was where the tension Mello felt originated from…

As the blonde's lungs began to burn in protest, he allowed a heavy exhale to be released as his only response to Near's burning questions. The answer and the story to follow was certainly not one he was willing to immediately tell Near. Not yet, anyway. Perhaps not ever.

The simple action he gave in response seemed to bring Near's questions back in check as his look turned away from Mello entirely, "Gather what information you want but I assume it goes without saying that you should not put anything out in the open that may even remotely be considered a risk. There's no way to be entirely certain whether your decisions are really the proper course of action, regardless of whether we can trust her solely based on her word alone." Near practically commanded of the older, his tone solid and unwavering in his point, as though he was controlling all the parts that went into directing the helm of the ship that was his investigation.

Mello, however, was no first mate, "I told you we're doing things my way, so I'm calling the shots on what we do and who we can trust. She can be trusted. It'll be fine."

Near placed another card to the top of the tower he was gingerly trying to erect. "For your sake hopefully that proves so. In the end, whatever happens ultimately falls onto you, Mello."

The blonde's look shifted over to the computer he was sitting in front of, his gaze on Near falling to merely the corner of his sights, "Trust me, I know." It would be placed upon River to investigate further into the workings of the Mafia and to locate the information they required. At the same time, if it really came down to it, it seemed to be a distinct possibility that it may end up being her who would finally have to execute Boss. Everything about her, outwardly, seemed as though she shouldn't be up for such intense pressures, but for everyone's sake Mello would have to trust her commitment to her previously made proclamation to him that she was willing to do anything for the cause.

After all, Mello knew better than to second guess the motivations of revenge.

For now, however, planning the precise course of action fell onto his shoulders. Where precisely should she begin, and what tasks did that leave for him to conduct from the sidelines? This sort of work was the sort of material he'd been trained for years to do; it was what made the blood in his veins race, and the cadence of his heart pound out of his chest from the risk bordering the fringes of his ever thought.

But under Near's vigilant stare, which was apt to involuntary bouts of judgment with only marginal acts of intervention, suddenly everything Mello did felt scrutinized like the actions of a lab rat. No, like he was just a child, back within that institution's prying gaze into every single thing he did.

There was a brief exhale from the other side of the room, followed by the seemingly pervasive silence that always seemed to follow the two successors.

For hours they worked in that manner, Near looking over documents while he simultaneously stacked up his tower of cards, while Mello tapped away at the computer, reading through past files that were archived regarding Mafia workings; searching for leads and for ways to possibly hack into any system established within the criminal organization that may have information.

Hacking was not something Mello ever particularly liked doing, as his specialty had always been hacking into people rather than technology. This sort of work was something he'd always preferred to leave to Matt to figure out… But he wasn't entirely incapable of it, and considering the outside location he was forced to remain within, it seemed to be the only viable way to get anywhere on his own. But even with that, there wasn't much to go on. Surprisingly, the organization was rather good at covering up trails that weren't just made of blood.

"You know, "Near's voice finally cut through the stagnant air that had been suffocating the entire room, "It's really quite unfortunate that you blew your last acceptance into their organization. It would have been immensely beneficial to this case to have you in the field conducting this sort of surveillance work."

Mello leaned back in his chair, his fingers threading through his hair once more as he looked away from the computer screen and over at the other. "We have someone in the field." He corrected, though he could practically see the way Near's eyes rolled in response.

"Having just anyone doing this sort of work is not quite the same as what I had in mind."

Through the vagueness of Near's words Mello suddenly picked up on the meaning the younger was attempting to try and convey, 'It'd be better to have you out doing the leg work. I can anticipate what you're going to do far more accurately than someone hired. I'd trust your actions and decisions far more than anyone else.'

A slight glimmer of a smile crossed his face, "That's oddly forthcoming of you."

"Don't think too far into it." Near replied, as though reading into Mello's thoughts just as the blonde had just done to him. "That being said… what exactly did you do to warrant getting thrown out again?" Finally it seemed he found the confidence, or rather was merely tired of being stuck with the questions he'd kept to himself before.

Mello's look immediately turned to a glower, "I didn't get thrown out the first time. Regardless, what happened is none of your business. That's not what matters right now anyway."

Near shrugged, reaching up to twirling a lock of hair, "Everything matters in an investigation. A good detective is not so quick to overlook any matters concerning the subject of investigation; even the smallest of details can at times be the most vital." Mello was about to shoot off the first thing to come to his mind when Near continued, "Besides, it seems rather preferable for partners to be able to have free conversation between each other, don't you think?

Immediately Mello backtracked from the offensive position Near's words had forced him into, 'Partners?' This was certainly new… Where had all of this suddenly come from?

He opened his mouth to ask just such question, but before he could form the words the door to the room slid open; both sets of eyes moved over to watch as Michael came running into the darkened space, "Daddy, I finished my work! Let's go play!" He stopped immediately though as his gaze caught sight of not only Mello, but Near in the room with him as well. The natural smile that always seemed to exist on the young boy's features began to grow with each passing second as the wheels behind his eyes clicked into high gear and Mello clearly read the assumptions the child was making.

Something within him grew warm, as if for some reason embarrassed to be seen working in the same room as Near, as if somehow merely the act of being caught together was too much for the moment. "Michael," He started, as though that would distract either of their own inner musings regarding the situation, "Good timing, let's go play." He stood up as he spoke, heading over to the boy.

The younger blonde, however, made little to no move at all to head back to the door, "Yeah!" He exclaimed, though his look moved over to Near, "Come play with us too, Mama!"

Near practically scoffed, his fingers remaining locked within his hair, "No, that's quite alright, there's still quite a lot of work that needs to be done."

Mello's hand came to rest on the top of Michael's soft locks of hair, though his azure eyes looked back at Near; glaring momentarily at the detective, 'Work… he says it as though we haven't been working on this for hours. Like he's trying to make me out to be the one who's slacking!' History told him that that wasn't quite what Near's message was trying to get at, but the dominating part of his mind seemed to dictate that that was the exact meaning being implied; that he was inadvertently saying that Mello was shirking his responsibilities. As though Michael counted so little in terms of significance to everything else.

Michael sighed, "Okay." Something within his tone said that he was used to getting these sorts of responses from Near; that this was just another common occurrence in Michael's everyday life, and just the hint of that alone made Mello angrier.

"Go on," Mello instructed, pulling the boy's attention back to him, "Get whatever you want to play with and I'll come get you in a minute." Michael nodded, the smile returning to his face as he turned back to the door and left just as quickly as he'd come, the room suddenly left to fall within the familiar silence of countless words hanging upon the air.

Mello sighed, "This shouldn't happen. He shouldn't see things like this, you know." His words were constructed together within his thoughts almost as quickly as they were finding the air, as though he was unable to keep the words within his own mind. "Trying to work together then arguing with one another… it's just going to give him mixed ideas of where we stand."

Near shifted, turning to where Mello remained in the doorway, his figure a ghostly visage against the backdrop of electronic screens glowing behind him, "Why?" He wondered, "Weren't you the one who was so convinced that it was best for him to have a view of us as, the way you put it so eloquently, 'getting along'? Separation and getting along… you can't have it both ways, Mello."

He glared back at him, though Near hardly seemed to take notice, let alone be affected, "I don't want it both ways." Then what did he want? Through their stare, somehow the unspoken question seemed to be transmitted.

Near's look moved from Mello to the closed door beside him, his focus clearly shifting from what he was seeing in front of him back into the realm of his thoughts, "I have learned over this year that sometimes it is simpler merely to just let Michael live within whatever contrived fantasy he wants to instead of wastefully spending time trying to construct whatever reality you want him to see." A glimmer of a smirk grew across his features as his gaze moved back to Mello, "Sounds oddly familiar, no?"

Mello's glare intensified on him as he scoffed and turned to exit the investigation room, "Shut up."

-:-

'Near's acting strange lately…' Mello thought to himself, the world falling away from his sights as he contemplated over everything Near had said to him within the last few hours. 'Partnerships… fantasies… those aren't things he just readily brings up without some sort of motive. What is it he's trying to get at? What is he trying to get out of me?' He wondered to himself. Better yet, what did Mello realistically have that Near could want from him?

'What if it's not quite that? What if he's not trying to get at anything specific? What if he's just… becoming more human again?' The thought didn't sit particularly right with him. 'But why? Why would he do that when he's been so closed off lately? Maybe he's just trying to keep me focused on him. Selfish bastard.' The logic seemed to make sense, but when placed against the way Mello knew Near's nature to be, it didn't quite seem to fit, though it was all he really had to go on.

'What is he trying to say?'

"Daddy!" Michael's voice shot through his thoughts, bringing him down out of his head to his current location.

The heavily shadowed, wide open space that was the ground floor of the old SPK building for which they were all practically trapped within came back into focus around him. Being an office building that was not used for its intended purpose, the main lobby of the building sat entirely empty and unused, though it's perimeter was lined with two-way glass to observe the people walking by, oblivious to the significance of what lay just beyond the two double door exit Mello stood before.

Freedom lay just on the other side, just one push would be all he needed to be free of these relentless questions being thrust upon him. Yet a chain seemed to exist around his ankle to the wall, keeping him anchored to the threshold. God did he want to run from it all, but did what lay beyond those two doors really appear better than the quality of life he had within these walls?

He turned to his son, showing that he was giving him his attention. Immediately Michael's face screwed together into one of confusion where he stood close by, holding a rubber ball close to his center that he'd brought down with him to play with, "Are we gonna go outside, now?"

Mello sighed, swallowing the heavy feeling of reluctance growing within his throat, "No, we're not. We can't go outside right now."

This only caused the boy's face to screw together further within its confusion, "Why? We used to go outside before, remember? I got sunburned once, but that hasn't really happened again! Rester takes me out sometimes! I wanna go play!" Within the small boy's words Mello could hear a remnant of himself; could practically see himself as a child, back when the officials wouldn't let him go play outside for what at the time seemed like preposterous reasoning, like it being too cold, or raining, or him being sick. Walls just didn't hold him as easily as they always had for Near, and clearly that was something he shared with his son.

"I know, Michael, believe me. I want to go out too. But I can't right now." He exhaled, the explanation behind his only reasoning burning at the back of his throat, and though every fiber of his being said not to formulate the words, it was all he had to lead with, and at the end of the day the truth seemed better than concocting some lie. "It's not safe right now."

Michael began bouncing the ball to himself against the floor, "Why not?" The suspicious tone in his voice made Mello wonder if the boy even believed what he'd said.

But he hesitated, uncertain where exactly the fine line existed between what he could reveal and what was pushing things too far. "I can't say." He said with an exhale. "You don't need to worry about why. It's just not safe. Near and I are working on it, though, so we'll be able to go out soon." Even within his vague details of skirting the question he tried to sound positive, but everything that was happening between himself, Near, and even River, all felt too tentative to adequately be confident in what the future was going to hold for all of them.

Michael turned from Mello, bouncing his ball harder to make it go higher up in the air, "Nobody ever tells me anythin'…" He said to himself, his tone dejected.

"Only because it's nothing you need to be worrying about." Mello persisted, trying to create the air of truth he needed to show Michael right now, though the boy always seemed to read right past it. Just like Near. "What, you don't trust Near and I?"

The boy was quiet for a long moment, "I dunno."

What did that mean?

He exhaled once more, his options waning by the moment. What did Near ever do when presented with predicaments like this, where Michael wanted to get his way and was able to curb a situation to meet that desire? Knowing the detective, he probably found a way to give into him, or had already pre-planned the perfect way to manipulate the boy out of any scenario.

Mello knelt down, bringing himself to a closer level to the younger blonde boy, "Well you're going to have to. Near and I know what we're doing, and though things may not look so good right now, I promise, in time I'll explain everything that's going on. But not right now."

Michael turned to him, skepticism filled within his gray orbs, "You always say that."

"Because it's always true. You just have to be patient."

The answer still didn't seem to sit well with Michael, and with yet another quick thought Mello shuffled a bit, reaching to his pocket, "You know, when I was gone that year I never stopped thinking about you, Michael. I may not be able to really tell you where I was, yet, or what I was doing at the time, but what I can say is that just because I was gone doesn't mean I didn't constantly think about coming back for you."

From within his pocket he pulled out a small blue plastic car, the color of which had been dulled down from the extensive amount of time it'd spent both within pockets, and fumbled with between his fingers. Immediately Michael's eyes grew wider as he recognized the car as his own, though Mello continued speaking, "Things might seem really confusing right now, Michael; they were for me too. But I got this from where you left it at the apartment and it helped me get through the year away; to keep going so I could come back."

"Come back for me and Mama?"

Mello paused, considering over his words before outright letting them spill. "Yeah, something like that." Smooth…

"Though, I think now something as special as this would be best given back to you, for safe keeping." Mello finally finished, offering out the small blue car to the young blonde who looked between the toy to Mello then back again, as if almost skeptical of the move for whatever reason. In the back of his mind Mello made a note that it seemed Near was not the only one who was beginning to act curiously.

Finally the boy took a step forward to him, "Promise we're gonna get to go outside soon?" He asked, the skepticism ringing now not only within his outward features, but his tone as well, making no move to try and hide it. For the moment Mello decided to overlook it, though.

"Yeah, I promise. We'll play outside until you get sunburned and then Near will get mad at me for letting you stay out that long." As he spoke a small smile crept across his own features at merely the thought of such an occurrence, and how likely it was to actually happen if the scenario ever got the chance to play out.

With that Michael reached out and took the car from Mello's hand, moving the cool plastic as he examined it with his fingers. He nodded, "Okay. I guess I can wait." And for now, that would have to be good enough.

A/N: I apologize for not updating last week! As I explained on Tumblr, last week was my finals week and I had a few very long papers that needed taken care of. But anyway, the point is that now I'm back with regular updates! This chapter is a bit of a way-point feature between what is happening, and what will happen in the subsequent chapters. I've tried to add in what interactions I can, but believe me when I say it's all building to the intensity that is going to happen a few chapters for now. As always, please be sure to tell me your thoughts on this chapter, as well as any thoughts for what may happen in the future. I love reading all of your comments and appreciate you taking the time to send them my way!

Please review
-Forbiddensoul562