A/N - its a miracle! another chapter in two days! with school and a party! however, getting lost in the chapter has meant its taken a different direction to what i originally thought - as did the last chapter - and im not sure if i really like where this is headed.

Chapter 10 – talk to me

Trying to decipher Charlie's thoughts was like trying to swim through treacle; difficult, but not impossible. And it was made even harder by the fact that he was intoxicated. I was immensely grateful that my vampire mind worked at the speed it did... but I was no longer so sure when I managed to get the first clear thought out of his head. He was thinking strong thoughts, they blocked everything else out for him as they bombarded my mind. But what I was seeing wasn't Bella. I could tell that right away, it was so out of character for her that my brain immediately rejected the idea that the video was all it looked like.

But Charlie was so blinded by rage and betrayal that he couldn't see that. I now knew his reason for being a drunk, but it only enraged me further that he had so little faith in his daughter. I didn't want to see any more, I recoiled my mind from Charlie's like his mind's poisonous thoughts were contagious.

As soon as Bella turned and saw her father in the hall, all her new-found confidence crumbled into terror as she backed away from him and into me. I quickly pushed her behind me, holding her upright as her feet stumbled on the steps.

"Go ahead, protect the stupid whore! It's not like she's worth it!" he spat angrily. Wrongly feeling betrayed that someone could support his daughter when she had betrayed him so hideously. I felt disgust rise in me.

I backed away slowly, keeping Bella behind me at all times now we were on even ground. My eyes never left Chief Swan, even though he wasn't fast enough to get past me even if I was distracted. I felt my fury pulse through my veins in response to my desperate need to protect Bella.

"Bella," I said to her lowly, trying to keep my voice calm and not betray my vehemence, "go get in the car."

"Please... don't do anything," she almost begged me, I guess I wasn't so great at controlling my anger.

"So you're her new toy then, I wonder how long you'll last? I wonder if you know about Jacob, are you just a little fling on the side for her? Or did she break up with Jacob for you? Did she convince you she's something special?" Charlie turned his harsh words to me.

"Does this happen often?" I murmured to her even though I could guess the answer with a fair amount of accuracy.

I heard her hesitate before she finally, reluctantly admitted, "Y-yes," in a whisper, "But please, don't do anything."

"I'm not going to do anything too rash, but you should know that he has responsibilities. You deserve better than a drunk for a father," by this time we were getting fairly close to my car now... and Chief Swan was half-way across the front garden. My phone vibrated in my pocket but I ignored it as I was still caught in the middle, protecting Bella from her father.

"Can't we just go?" Bella pleaded with me almost desperately.

I turned and looked at her, searching her endless eyes to fathom why she was so desperate just to get out of here. I saw that she was terrified, but of what, I just couldn't work out... until her eyes darted over my shoulder and widened in fresh panic. I whipped my head around, faster than human eyes could follow to see Charlie barrelling down the few feet distance left between me and him.

"Get in the car Bella," I growled, frustrated as I met Charlie's attack head on.

I caught each of Charlie's arms as they came at me – it would probably harm him more if he actually punched me – and remembered what Bella said about not wanting me to do anything. So I merely stopped him from attacking me. Once I held his arms secure, he started kicking me. At a complete loss of what to do, I settled for pushing him further back towards the house. I could see him getting more enraged and his attacks got wilder and wilder. Each time I managed to stop him before he seriously hurt himself. I got why Bella didn't want anything started with Charlie, he as her dad. And even through all his... flaws, she still loved him.

I heard a strangled cry of "Edward!" come from behind me.

I quickly glanced over my shoulder to see a panic-stricken Bella watching with anxious eyes from the car. I sighed, Bella needed to be away from here, she didn't need to see her dad fighting against me just so he could get to her. I pushed Charlie so he would land on his backside, just enough to delay any pursuance he might make. I dashed back to the car, barely restraining myself to human speed.

I jumped in the car and let my finger work as fast as they could to start the engine before reversing down the drive and heading away form Bella's house, carrying her away from danger.

I noticed a quivering in the air on my right side, I glanced across to find Bella shivering in her seat, "Are you alright?"

"I'm fine," was her automatic answer, her voice coming out high and dazed. She continued to stare through straight ahead as she answered me.

I frowned, she was clearly was not alright. I reached over, but hesitated with my hand only a few inches from her face. Could I touch her? Could I allow myself that luxury when my frigid skin certainly wouldn't help the shivering? Could I allow myself – as a vampire – to touch her – as a human? My keen eyes caught the beginnings of a tear form in her eye and suddenly those questions seemed insignificant in the light on one glaring truth; Bella needed comforting.

I gently placed my finger under her chin, surprised to find a warm crackling sensation spreading from the exact point where my skin made contact with hers and pulsing through my body, awakening each dead cell. To say the feeling was pleasant would be a gross understatement.

I coaxed Bella's head to the side, trying to get her to look at me. When her eyes met mine I could still see the apprehension in her eyes, "Bella, seriously, what's wrong?"

I felt my insides clench painfully as Bella's lower lip started to tremble slightly, "My dad," she whispered hoarsely, "He hates me."

I wanted Bella to tell me what happened, I knew something was up between them, and I knew it had something to do with a video of... I clenched my teeth at the thought. I was still determined to think there was something more to those videos than meets the eye.

"Why would he hate you?" I asked softly trying to unravel the mystery that was Bella Swan.

She closed her eyes, hiding from me my best avenue to her thoughts, I only managed to see a flash of deep pain and regret before her eyelids barred the way. "Because... because he thinks I'm a whore, the whole school does, in case you haven't noticed," her tone was laced with bitterness towards the end.

But. She only said that they think she's a whore. That says that she doesn't think she is. It gave me hope. "Why?" I breathed, "Tell me what happened."

She leaned back against her seat in the car and a tear made its way down her cheek. She looked exhausted... but not broken like she did before. "It all started at Jared's birthday. I went with my boyfriend, Jacob because it was one of his friend's party. They were at a club and they bought me drinks because I was under-age, but I guess one of them spiked my drink with something because I kinda got all woozy and sleepy. Then, I don't remember much other than I couldn't get them off me and it was the most terrifying thing that I had ever experienced. When I woke up the next day I felt like I had a hangover – I've never actually had one but I've been told what it's like – but then they started again, I was drugged again and they were rough and they videoed it... and that was just the first of many. I never remembered anything that happened, so I would always watch the videos back just to see if..." I grieved for her.

I knew what she was trying to say when she trailed off at the end, "And, did they...?" I trailed off, the rest of the sentence not needed and not conducive to not hurting Bella any further than she had been already since the birthday party.

She looked at me then, "No," she whispered.

I was instantly filled with relief. "Thank you," I whispered back.

"For what?"

"For sharing," I looked deep into her chocolate eyes which were filled with shame and regret, "even though most of the school probably knows and that's why they bully you, it's good that you're able to get it off your chest... and it also means a lot that you would open up to me like that... But one thing I don't understand though; where's Jacob now?"

"Oh," she blushed slightly, "I dumped him. On Sunday, after you drove me home."

I looked at her in surprise and awe... again. "Really? And he just left?"

She shifted uncomfortably, "Well..." I glanced at her wondering how Jacob was obviously still haunting her, "When he gets drunk at night, he kinda... comes banging on the door and shouting for me, wanting me back."

Jesus Christ! How had I missed this? "That's why you always looked so tired," I said in bleak realisation, "That's why you bought the deadbolts, that's why you always got me to leave early, that's why your truck was destroyed... is that why surprises scare you?" I asked softly at the end, remembering her panic on Tuesday.

She nodded meekly. My heart broke for her again, no longer in merely two halves, it was now torn and shredded beyond recognition. With a lot of effort I forced my mind away from thoughts of tracking down this mysterious Jacob and into thinking only of what Bella needed.

"The hospital, when I found you..." I trailed off not willing to repeat the memory in any detail, "you dad or Jacob?" I asked.

"My dad," she breathed. She saw my appalled look and as I opened my mouth to speak she cut me off predicting what I would say next, "If it had been Jacob, I probably would have told you... but Charlie's the Chief of police! It would be his word against mine, and no-one would believe me, they all think I'm a lying,cheating scumbag."

I took a deep breath and halted my questions, seeing that she was exhausted. "Do you want to stay at my house tonight?" I asked.

She hesitated a moment before looking at me with a brand new hope shining in her eyes. The sparkle in her eyes ignited again and I felt warmth radiate out from the place where my heart used to beat.

"Really?" she asked and I nodded, "Oh, thank you Edward! Oh. I don't have any stuff with me."

I shook my head, "That's alright, I'm sure Alice or Rosalie or Esme could sort you out with something."

Bella nodded and relaxed in my car. Her eyelids started to droop and it looked as though she didn't have long left before she would be under. She would definitely be asleep by the time we got to my house.

Bella's pov

I woke up in an unfamiliar room. I was on a huge, incredibly soft and comfortable, four-poster bed with golden sheets matching the walls and carpet. I noticed a vast CD and book collection spanning the entirety of one wall, a black sofa was pushed up against the wall on the other side while the wall opposite me was entirely made out of glass. As I was admiring the intricate, wrought-iron roses adorning the bed frame, I suddenly realised where I was.

There was a knock at the door, I jumped slightly and told them to come in. Edward poked his head around the door before entering the room slowly. I noticed he had some clothes in his hand as he slowly approached me.

"Are you alright? You fell asleep in the car and I just carried you up here. You haven't been asleep for long, just enough time for Alice to sort you out something to sleep in." How did he do that? How did he answer my questions without me even asking them? How did he know exactly what to say to make me feel better? I felt another surge of warmth and affection at his thoughtfulness.

"Thank you," I said smiling and taking the pyjamas out of his hands. I still couldn't believe, after everything he knew about me, he hadn't been repulsed by me.

"You can come back downstairs if you want after or stay up here, they know you're tired – I didn't tell them anything other than that you were exhausted. You cant tell them when and if you're ready, but even if you don't want to tell anyone else about it, I'm always here for you Bella." He smiled kindly at me and left me alone to get changed.

Looking through the bundle Edward gave me, I also found a toothbrush and a towel. Hmm it would be nice to have a shower before bed. I picked up the bundle and tried to find where the shower was. However, I didn't have to look long as the room had an en suite bathroom discreetly hidden in the corner beside the massive shelves, almost overflowing as they stretched along the wall. It was an impressive, intimidating sight that drew the eye along the wall and to the window.

The regular beat of the hot water against my skin was so soothing, I seriously considered staging in there forever. Alas, there were other people probably wanting to shower at some point tonight. I sighed as I reluctantly climbed out of the shower only to wrap myself in the softest, fluffiest towel ever to have existed on this earth. I hoped the pyjamas would be just as soft.

It was probably too much to hope for that the pyjamas would be as luxurious as everything else. Reluctantly, I extricated myself from the towel's warm embrace and into the cooler surroundings of the pyjamas. They were a set of a deep blue, cotton tank top, with spotty, blue fleece bottoms. And they lived up to the towels softness.

I felt... content. For the first time in years I felt truly happy, not just in a superficial way, this happiness ran bone-deep. It was a happiness that took a lot more to make it disappear. Which made it all the more special.

I wasn't sure whether I wanted to go downstairs or not, I was still so exhausted I was worried I might pass out again, but it would be rude of me not to at least thank everybody for letting me stay here, wouldn't it? By this time I was halfway down the stairs and tense voices were impinging on my consciousness.

"Alice! You were eavesdropping in the car?" I heard Edward's voice raised in frustration, disbelief and anger.

"Well, you didn't answer my call when I saw what was going to happen!" Alice shot back.

"That's because it was already happening! I couldn't just say to Bella's dad: can you just wait a minute while I take this call from my psychic sister who's about to tell me exactly what's going to happen in the next ten minutes!" The Alice was psychic? Was this some inside joke? They didn't know I was listening did they? Was that why they were talking about eavesdropping? I was struggling to wrap my mind around the concept that someone could actually see the future.

"I was just seeing if everything was ok!" The Alice defended indignantly.

"First; why would everything not be ok? And second; that was a private conversation! You should have just stopped listening as soon as you saw everything was ok, Bella told me those things in confidence and then you just listened in!"

"Carlisle!" The Alice called lowly. I could hear the guilt layering in her voice... but that didn't change that fact that she still knew. It was my secret, I hadn't been able to tell anyone for over a year, and suddenly people knew it without me realising. The thought made me dizzy.

I heard a whooshing noise and then, "I'm sorry Alice, but Edward's right, it wasn't your place to listen into other peoples secrets without their knowledge. Telling someone a secret is an act of trust, which the other person should respect. But listening into other peoples secrets..."

I didn't want to hear any more. The Alice knew? She knew everything? I felt my weak legs crumble as I collapsed unceremoniously onto the stairs. My blank stare ahead of me wasn't interrupted by my modified position and I couldn't find it in me to care either way, my mind was still reeling with the knowledge that Alice knew! My body felt weightless, yet at the same time, I was struggling to hold myself vertical. I sighed and let my head fall onto the wall, not caring about the potential for a bruise. I felt like crying, all I wanted was for my problems to just go away.

As soon as the dull thud of my head hitting the wall sounded out, all other sound ceased. You could feel the tension emanating out of the living room miles away. Then Edward was there, at the bottom of the stairs looking up at me. Then Alice was by his side, then Carlisle. I was too fatigued to think more of it... even though people don't just appear out of know where – without trap doors and puffs of smoke.

The Alice made a move towards me, but as I flinched Edward stuck his arm out to stop her. His voice was softer than in the living room, "just give it some time Alice, you can have your say in the morning." And with that he slowly, but deliberately walked up the stairs to me, gently scooped me up into his arms and carried me back to the room I was in before and tucked me in bed with a tenderness that I wasn't sure was actually present due to my delusional state of weariness.

Once again I woke up in the the huge bed. As soon as I became aware I opened my eyes, but moved nothing else. The Alice knew. Had she told anyone else? Exactly how much did she know? I wasn't ready for her to know, not yet. It wasn't that I thought she would go around advertising it to the whole world, but it would make me uncomfortable around her.

I eventually got up, needing another shower, even if it was purely for therapeutic reasons. I felt a little better after I had freshened up and found the courage to go back downstairs. I walked into the bedroom brushing my hair when I heard another knock on the door. I panicked for a minute – I wasn't ready for this! How could I face The Alice knowing that she knew? – until I heard Edward's voice floating through the door, asking me if he could come in.

I relaxed immediately as I found out it was Edward on the other side of the door. Why was everything going wrong? I finally thought things were looking up when we were shopping, but then everything came crashing down on me with Charlie... He had attacked Edward! My heart stopped when I thought Charlie would actually harm him. I remembered the feel of my heart frantically pumping the worry-induced adrenalin around my veins. Charlie may have given birth to me and provided me with a place to stay and some comfort over the years, but he wasn't the best dad... And he lost that title when he turned his back on me. The familial loyalty I felt towards him vanished when I realised that Charlie had none. I felt resentment towards him build in me as it had with Jacob, although I don't think I could hate anyone as much as I hated him.

Edward crept into the room and sat on the bed, only a few inches away from me. He stared at the sheets on the bed – guilt written all over his posture – took a deep breath, like he was stealing himself for something then spoke, "I'm sorry about Alice. She has no shame when it comes to other people's business... I know you have a right to be angry with her – and it's ok, I'm furious with her too – but she meant no harm and she hasn't told anyone else. No-one else will ask either her or me what was said in the car, no-one will put pressure on you to tell them if you don't want to."

He finally looked at me then, with sincere, remorseful eyes, "I know you've kept that to yourself for a long time, you must have for you to be so hesitant to tell me. But I'm glad you did. Bella, that secret doesn't make you a bad person, it doesn't make you any less perfect. It doesn't mean you were letting everyone bully you, you thought the consequences of telling people would be worse than not. No-one can hold that against you. Take all the time you need, just know that I'm there for you alright?"

I looked down and nodded. I was so touched by his words, and he still thinks I'm perfect? Well, obviously he doesn't think I'm perfect, but he still likes me? He's not running away as fast as he can in the opposite direction? I felt warm and happy and confident, while at the same time weak and extremely vulnerable. I realised for the first time, that I was actually placing complete trust in someone else. I needed physical reassurance that he wouldn't betray me. I wanted to feel his arms around me once again.

I swear that boy could read my mind; because no sooner had the thought entered my head than I felt his arms wrap around me. I was a little hesitant at first to wrap my arms around him, he was the only friend I had... but if he'd had plenty of opportunity to reject me. But what if he didn't want to be this close to me... physically? I mean, he'd been there for moral support more times than I could count, but now he knew what Jacob had done to me... did he feel I was contaminated?

But then I realised that Edward had initiated the hug, so what did it matter if my hands were around him as well? I hugged him back squeezing tightly as I let my emotions out. Things had changed, I was no longer sure I could go back to living at Charlie's house, dead certain I never wanted to see Jacob again and confused as to what to do about Alice. After a while I began to ache from my awkward positioning, but I didn't want to let go yet. Edward became uncomfortable as well and tried to move a little, but I was emotional and irrationally panicked and clung onto him, thinking that he was leaving me. So he made sure to keep one arm tights around me while he manoeuvred both of us into a more comfortable position.

We sat on the bed, holding each other for a long time. Edward had the patience of a saint, never giving any indication that he was bored or frustrated or even that he wanted to do something else. Even when I had cried myself out and was just resting with him because it felt nice and comforting he laid with me, holding me... until my stomach growled. He laughed and pulled back to look at me clearly.

"Should we get you something to eat?" he asked amusement still clear in his voice.

I grinned and nodded, but my enthusiasm faltered when I thought of going downstairs, "Will there be many people downstairs?" I asked, not up to being stared at especially today by more people.

"Only Esme, everyone else went to school and Carlisle's at the hospital."

"Ok, lets go," I said lightly as I jumped off the bed towing Edward behind by the hand. My confession to him had lifted a weight off my chest and helped dissuade my fears of rejection, leaving me deliriously happy and playful. I grinned as I bounced down the stairs eager to feed my pitifully empty stomach.

A/N - ( i know, i know! two A/Ns in one chappy! grrrrrrr but if i remind you to review at the top then you will have forgotten by the time you've read the chappy, and the other stuff needed saying before you read the chappy so :P) please remember to review and also i have i new story that's kinda struggling with its popularity (i mentioned this last chapter but seriously - if you like this, then you'll like when memories fail) =]