Hey my wonderful reviewers! WE BROKE 100 REVIEWS!! I WOULD LIKE TO THANK ALL THE LITTLE PEOPLE WHO HELPED ME ON MY WAY TO GREATNESS AND SNOWSTORM25 CUZ SHE IS SITTING RIGHT NEXT TO ME AND MIGHT JUST KILL ME IF I DON'T MENTION HER!!
Ok, done being freaky now.
Special thanks to I. Write. Sins. Not. Tragedies. , I hate ballet (that's a person's username I LUV BALLET!!), and xNymphadoraxTonksx for the awesome ideas! There're more people who shared ideas but I am too lazy to look up the names.
Disclaimer: I am just too awesome to own Twilight! Just kidding! I just don't own it… BOOO HOO!!
10 Ways to Annoy Jasper Hale
1: Force him to read Alice slash and/or Jasper slash. When you're done force him to write some. Note: It is advised you do not wear nice clothes because of the barfing hazard.
2: Send Alice gushy love notes from Mike, and make him read them all. Pay Mike to hit on Alice while she is with Jasper.
3: Get Alice and the rest of the Cullens to go someplace for the day. Don't tell Jasper where Alice and Edward are. When he asks about them get all teary and say that they eloped and you are terrible sorry for him. Make sure you are long gone by the time the Cullens get back.
4: Take him to the studio audience of Dr. Phil. When it's over offer to consul him because the show has convinced you that he is emotionally unstable. Lecture him for countless hours about how he can improve this. Don't hesitate to continue in front of the Cullens or anyone else he knows. Bring soda to go with your popcorn.
5: Lock him in a room with a girl who is PMS and has emotional problems. Watch the fun from a safe distance.
6: Set him up with Jane. Video tape her flirting with him and send it to Alice. Tell Alice he went on the date willingly. DUN DUN DUN DUN!!
7: Follow him around singing "Girlfriend". Get Mike and Jessica to help you.
8: Let him loose on fan girls!
9: Tell Alice that all of his clothes got burnt mysteriously and he now needs a new wardrobe. When she has him try on a bunch of clothes at the mall, laugh at him. Bring popcorn and soda.
10: Buy him a hideous pink sweater. Force him to wear it on a date with Alice.
Yep. Another poor Twilight character tormented by yours truly, but for one unlucky character it's not quite over. I now present the results of the Reader's Choice Encore.
Tied in 5th place all with 0 votes are James, Mike, and Emmett.
Following closely in 4th are Bella and Rosalie with 1 vote apiece.
In 3rd place with 2 votes is Alice.
2nd place goes to Jacob with four votes…
…and now I am proud to announce the character who will be receiving more torture…
…in 1rst place with 8 votes is…
Ladies and gentlemen EDWARD CULLEN!!
Yes, yes at the moment things aren't looking so good for poor Eddie, BUT if you are set on having one of these other characters tortured than now is your chance: I am going to Leafdrop's Birthday party tomorrow so I won't be able to update, leaving you with ONE MORE CHANCE TO VOTE!! It's ok if you already voted, you get one more vote.
SO WHAT ARE YOU STILL READING MY RANTING FOR!! REVIEW TO SEAL THE CHARACTER'S FATE AND TO MAKE PATRONUS HAPPY!!
That's right just guide your little mice over to that review button…
Love you all!
Patronus