Chapter Nine
The next morning, at around four AM, us Cullen kids had once again met around the dining room table for our own version of a family conference. Both Edward and Emmett were a bit peeved by this, as the order to meet had cut into what Em called 'Real Sexy Time'- you could hear the capitals when he spoke. The man is bonkers, seriously.
A knocking on the table had us all looking up at Rosalie, who was sitting in Carlisle's customary seat. Her plan, her lead. Oh sweet baby Jesus, the woman had a gavel. Was everyone in my family crazy? Shaking my head, I hid my smile and paid attention. I didn't want to cross Rose if I could help it; she was the scariest of my siblings.
"Right! Listen Up!" Again, with the vocal capital letters. "We are here to discuss the first part of our truly brilliant plan 'Punish the Peroxide Princess'. As you know, this plan, and how far it goes will depend on whether the previous moments of diabolical genius have worked and the bitch has learned to shut her mouth. We will be starting off easy, going against the rumours of us being poor. This will be so ridiculously easy, it's actually laughable."
"Evil genius laugh! Muahahahahahahaaaaa!"
"Emmett, shut it."
"Sorry babe."
"Anyway, as I was saying. The first part is actually very simple. We are simply going to get dressed in our most expensive clothes, at least the ones we can get away with wearing whilst as school. Boys, I'm talking leather jackets, ray bans, the whole nine yards."
All the boys stood up as one and saluted. Having caught Alice's eye it was all I could do to not laugh at them. Damn if that wasn't just adorable.
"The labels we wear need to be noticeable. People need to look at us and know who we are wearing. This is not an award show and we don't want people asking us. Wear your most expensive shoes too. Not leather, your trainers. I know you all have a custom Nike pair. Get 'em out, get 'em on."
Nobody was arguing with her. This plan was straight to the point and easy to execute. I'm glad my curiosity held out. I had been dying (ha!) to find out what she was planning for us to do.
"Girls!"
Alice and I sat up straighter. Alice knew pretty much the outcome of this plan, but Rose's ideas had started getting more and more diabolical and extreme to prove her point, so nothing was really fixed properly. You could tell how bad it was when Alice had sat on the front steps rubbing her temples and muttering 'make up your pissing mind already' under her breath. I was completely clueless of course, and therefore was listening so that I didn't mess up. That would suck massively.
"Ours is the same thing, but more out there. I'm thinking Victoria Beckham jeans, known, iconic designer shoes, massive designer handbags, Gucci shades, that kind of thing. Classy, not trashy. Bella, I want you to wear that blue cashmere coat of yours. Not only is it Vintage Chanel it screams money."
I nodded, thinking that if I was still human I would have run for the hills the moment heels were mentioned. I suppose a century of practice will help with that though.
"Alice, I need you to wear the highest designer heels that you have. Again, flash that red sole. And your tight leather jacket. Again big sunglasses. I will, of course, be wearing the same theme."
Again, we all nodded. I felt a slight trill of fear that we were going to mess this up, but I didn't think it was mine. Sure enough, Emmet threw a dictionary at Jasper's forehead and the feeling disappeared. Rosalie was looking around the table meeting each of our eyes.
"This needs to work guys. I can't live with someone treating our family this way."
"We know Rosie. And we all feel the same way. We will try our very best not to let you down." Emmett rubbed a hand down Rosalie's arm soothingly as he said this and the tense set of her shoulders relaxed slightly. Biting her bottom lip, she nodded to the table before looking up and us.
"Let's do this shit."
"Hell Yeah Baby!"
We got up and filed out in two groups, guys and girls. We would each help the others get ready until we looked at our very richest. Good Lord, Alice was bouncing.
"You're serious?" Edward looked as though all his birthdays had come early. Emmett was channelling his inner Alice and bouncing up and down on the spot, his face alight with glee.
"Deadly."
"Rosalie, are you sure about this? We've never done this before, what happened to blending in?"
"What better way to hammer the point home? And blending in became a thing of the past when this bitch insulted our mother."
Jasper's face changed at that and he nodded with grim determination. We were standing in front of our garage, our ten car garage. Rosalie had decided that the biggest defence was the best offence and she wanted each of us to drive our most expensive personal vehicle. In this case, that was Edward's brand new Aston Martin, Emmett's new Bugatti, Alice's new Porsche, my brand new Ferrari, Jasper's new Mustang and her new BMW. Altogether, there was more than $2.5 million dollars' worth of car.
"Well shit baby, you know how to get a person's hackles up!"
Rose smirked at Emmett and looked at the rest of us.
"We need to time this perfectly. If we manage to arrive about five minutes before the bell rings, enough of the students will still be hanging around the parking lot. Maximum impact, little effort. We will go in one after the other, gunning the engines and park in a line. We will all sit in our cars with the engines running for one minute before turning the engines off and exiting our cars at the same time."
"There will be a row of empty spaces towards the back of the lot. We'll glide right in there. Everything should go well, at least as far as that point. I can't see beyond that as there are too many people involved. Too many variables for me to be sure of anything."
"Thanks Alice. Are there any questions?" Rosalie turned back towards us.
"I have one!"
"Of course you do, Em. What is it?"
"Who gets to go first?"
"Well, we will go in the order it take for them to come out of the garage. So Edward that will be you, followed by Bella, Alice, You, Me and Jasper. Edward wait at the end of the driveway and we will all be behind you." She smiled towards my husband "Don't forget to gun the engine brother dear."
Edwards face was lit with the excitement of showing off his latest car - my appreciation for cars had sky rocketed over the last fifty years or so, and I was just as excited as he was. We never got to show off our cars, having to drive them on the highway so this was an awesome change.
We moved as one toward the garage and our cars, picking up the relevant keys off the hook just inside the garage door as we went. As one we started the cars, the garage filled with the awesome sound of several thousand horse power. Again in unison, we revved the engines, and Edward shot out of the garage door, swiftly followed by me and the rest of our siblings.
As we drove down Main Street towards school, I could feel the eyes of the nosy people of Forks on our convoy. This was going to make the town record books, six super cars driving down the street all at once. I doubt that the tiny town had seen anything like this before. I was giddy! In my human days, I would have called it an adrenalin rush. Oh the faces were going to be a picture.
Suddenly my ringtone came through the speakers, and I tapped the button next to the gear shift to answer the call. Alice's voice came through the speakers and I knew that this was a six way call.
"Guys!"
"Alice!" was shouted by five different voices.
"You alright Ali?" Jaspers soft voice wafted through the car.
"Yes! You have no idea how epic this is gonna be!"
"Epic Alice? Really?" Edward's voice was slightly sceptical.
"Seriously, she's gonna be right there with her nest. Front row seat. This'll shut the bitch up."
"Hells yeah baby!"
"Guys, we're here. Let's do this!"
"Got it boss!"
The click of the phone, and I saw Edward take the final turning towards the school. Even with the roar of the engines, I could hear my family all laughing loudly to themselves. Emmett's laugh was so loud he might have been in the car with me. Alice's message had made us even giddier and I truly couldn't wait to see Peroxide's face.
Bring it Bitch.