A/N: It dawned on me today that there is probably a good reason why I haven't had many reviews for the last two pages… school. So I'll cut you all some slack. But, this week-end I'm hoping for reviews!
I forgot to thank and credit The Real Agent Smith for number 166! My bad, sorry about that!
-Page 10-
((A/N: This one is from Irishnut666))
181) Do not give Thor sugar.
a) Seriously people. Hyper active technologically advanced aliens are not funny!
b) Ok, maybe a little bit.
That day, the SGC found out just how fast the Asgard could run.
182) If your colleague re-appears after being dead for any given amount of time don't scream out "Does no one stay dead around here?"
a) No, no they don't.
b) How could you not know this by now?
It seemed no sooner then Gen. O'Neill finished the paper work for Col. Smith, did said Colonel re-appear naked and very much alive in the infirmary.
((A/N: This idea was suggested by a few people: MuseUrania is the only one I can remember though... Sorry!)
183) Don't tell the Jaffa about jaffa cakes.
a) Or tell them that they are made from real Jaffa.
b) Or that the orange bit is candied Goa'uld.
You ever see a 250-pound former First Prime run screaming from the mess before? SG-4 did.
184) You have spell check on your computer. Use it!
Turns out Gen. O'Neill was a stickler for proper English. Guess that explained why he hated it when people ended a sentence with a preposition
185) Don't walk through the gate and loudly proclaim "I claim this land in the name of Hammond of the Shiny Forehead!"
a) Or "I hereby name this land, Simpsonia!"
Gen. Landry put this one up after he started reading O'Neill's old mission reports.
186) Be careful who you hit one. Their boyfriend/girlfriend/family might not like it.
Sam, John, Cassie, Janet and Lt. Laura Cadman were very attractive people.
Jack, Teyla, Janet and Carson were very good at attacking people.
187) Batman is not the President. Don't tell people he is.
SGA-3 was seriously messed up.
188) Watch you language.
a) Especially around small children!
The children of MX9-502 wanted to know why they were not allowed to say F---. After all, that grumpy Rodney man from Atlantis could say it. John actually gagged him and marched him strait up to Elizabeth to explain exactly why they lost the trade agreement.
189) Participating in "Talk like a Pirate Day" is fine. Just don't type your reports up in "Pirate."
September 19th became the day the pentagon hated the most. 55 reports (from two galaxies) all in "Pirate." Major Davis actually burst into tears half way through.
((A/N: Thanks to Smilingsam!)
190) If the natives are happy to see you chances are they're going to try to kill you.
This was just a fact of life at the SGC.
191) Don't fight over board games.
SG-24 squabble like toddlers, so Sam treated them as such. She made them each stand in a corner.
192) Stop fighting over sports!
a) Olympics, World cup, Super Bowl… I don't care!
b) Act like adults!
(It doesn't matter what the other person said, you can't hit them Radek! -Weir)
The last time the Olympics were played, eight people ended up in the SGC infirmary. Apparently, there was an all-out brawl in Atlantis over the World Cup.
193) Don't moon the villagers.
SG-9 decided the prudish natives of Carthak needed to lighten up. It didn't work.
194) Don't tell the Goa'uld about the Wraith.
It suddenly dawned on SG-1 just how bad it would be if a Goa'uld managed to take a Wraith as a host. The Joint Chiefs had never called a meeting that quickly before. Some were actually beamed into the Oval Office wearing their pjs.
195) Don't stalk SG-1.
a) You're creeping us out.
b) Its also really distracting.
The most recent batch of Newbies took hero worship to a whole new level of stalker-ish. It got to the point where Teal'c was sending Floppy into rooms in advance to clear everyone out.
196) When you see the Nox don't refer to them as trolls.
Gen. Landry was just glad they didn't hear SG-23.
197) The medical staff is no linger allowing video game marathons.
Dr. Lam couldn't tell you which were worse: the dehydration after a 12 hour, non-stop gaming session, the sprained thumbs or the bruises from the fist fights that broke out when someone cheated. Either way she needed a lot of Aspirin.
198) Don't give the natives your copy of "Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix."
a) Or any other of the Harry Potter books.
b) Do you want us to start banning books?
((A/N: Thanks to Hatake no Kuro Fenikkusu for number 199. I did tweak it a bit though!)
199) Just because it looks cute and fuzzy, doesn't mean it's nice.
Many people thought about Floppy when they heard about this, but it was actually about a rather adorable race of fluffy kitten/bat hybrids with nasty tempers and two rows of sharp, pointy, razor-like teeth.
200) Floppy is not you "Evil minion from Hell."
a) You all think you're so funny don't you?
b) Just stop writing it into your weekly reports!
-End Page 10-
A/N 2: Well, I should hope you all know what to do by now… Click the shiny button that says "GO" and make my day!
A/N 3: Not sure if any of you noticed, but I had gone back to "Pick-Up Lines" to do some editing, and accidently replaced page 7 with page 8. And I had no back-up copy. I nearly cried. So if anyone remembers any of the lines, or has new ones, please send them to me so I can try and fix it! Thanks,
-Kat