All credit goes to J.R.R. Tolkien and plot generator dot org dot uk. I do hope Sam and Galadriel forgive me for this, but I'm not sure what Frodo thinks of this plot. We'll see what happens.
Frodo the Vampire Slayer
A Teen Vampire Story
by Aria Breuer
There's an intuitive new girl in Frogmorton and she has everybody talking. Stunningly slender and devastatingly weak, all the boys want her. However, Galadriel has a secret - she's a wild vampire.
Frodo Baggins is a remarkable, tall boy who enjoys boxing. He becomes fascinated by Galadriel who can stop rhinos with her bare hands. He doesn't understand why she's so standoffish. His best friend, an optimistic dragon called Samwise, helps Frodo begin to piece together the puzzle. Together, they discover the ultimate weapon - the pink, tattered Orcrist.
When bodies start turning up all over Frogmorton, Frodo begins to fear the worst. The dragon urges her to report Galadriel to the police and he knows he should, so what's stopping him?
He may resist Galadriel's bite, but can he resist her charms? Will he be caught sitting with the vampire?
o-o-o
Praise for Frodo the Vampire Slayer
"Bursting with originality. A remarkable boy falling for a slender vampire has simply never been done before." - The Daily Tale
"About as moving as a cow stuck in a bog, but Frodo the Vampire Slayer does deliver an important message about not having a dragon for a friend." - Enid Kibbler
"A pink, tattered Orcrist would be my first choice too. This must be based on a true story, you couldn't make this stuff up!" - Hit the Spoof
"I could do better." - Zob Gloop