9:31 Firstfall 27th
I woke up as the sun was barely coming out. I groaned, my body feeling so tired from the emotional roller-coaster that I had to go through yesterday. I made a quick breakfast of eggs and bread and left some for Fenris for when he woke up. I got on my armor and daggers and went out. The merchants were beginning their day. I felt giddy for some odd reason. Weird how my emotions changed like that. I think it was because I never hated Anders for leaving. I was just mad at him.
I also hurt him. It didn't make me feel better. It made me feel worse especially since Anders even thanked me for it. I pushed it down though. I would go through that another day.
I went down the stairs and over to the lifts. I went down and moved past the few people who were up. I had to twist someone's arm when they tried going for my daggers. I came in front of the clinic that he had and let out a breath. Things were different now. I had slight anxiety but not as much as last time. I opened the door and Anders was already there healing a few of the refugees children. He looked over to me and smiled. There was a funny feeling in my stomach when he did that. I couldn't help but smile back at him.
"There. You need to make sure you have blankets for the night to avoid this happening."
"Thank you, thank you." The mother cried, holding her son in her arms before going out the doors.
"Nia."
"Good Morning Anders." We stood awkwardly around each other before my face flushed from it all.
"Did you sleep well?"
"As well as I could on the floor."
"He's not giving you a bed?"
"There was only one and he took it. There was a bed frame but that broke and the mattress was cut through." I explained. Anders groaned and shook his head.
"…You're not…?" He insinuated.
"No."
"Oh good." Anders said with relief. I laughed.
"Ok Anders, I think you owe me an explanation."
"About…?" He gave me an innocent face. I crossed my arms.
"You're pulling a me and glowing." I said. Anders got quiet and looked at the people leaving. He motioned to me and we went behind a partition that was the only thing keeping his bed being viewed by everyone.
"Do you remember what you explained to me? How the spirit came and saved you and now that spirit is residing in you?"
"A part of the spirit, yeah."
"…Justice-"
"Is inside you because you let him in." I finished. Anders gave me a surprised look. "Come on Anders, I can be stupid sometimes but not that stupid."
"You are not stupid."
"I have my blonde moments." I shrugged. Anders pinched my cheek for that one. I chuckled. "Are you ok though? My spirit doesn't manifest that…well angry unless I'm that angry." Anders sighed and sat on his bed. I sat next to him.
"Justice and I started to talk when we were in the Deep Roads. He realized the injustice of the mages and he wanted to change that. We both did. Kristoff's body was already rotting in the Deep Roads. I let him in and we left his body for Aura after we left. When I let Justice inside of me…my anger transformed him. I was too angry and it was too much for him. He became twisted. He is now a spirit of vengeance with no sense of mercy. Amazingly he recognizes you."
"He does?"
"He remembers the lyrium ring, the conversations you had. I was hoping to somehow use this to save the mages and now…I can't do a thing."
"You are doing good Anders. These people rely on you." I said, putting my hand on his shoulder. He went and grabbed it.
"Thank you. I am sorry for…I abandoned you. I'm surprised you forgave me so easily after slapping me. I had to heal myself from that one." He said, rubbing his cheek. I chuckled.
"I…I was more angry that you left without a word…I didn't hate you Anders. I don't hate you. I just felt…betrayed…I guess all I wanted was to see you again. Weird huh?"
"No. There were times when I thought whether I was doing the right thing. You have no idea how many times I wanted to go back, if only for you."
"But you didn't and now here we both are."
"True."
"You know Ser Pounce-a-lot survived."
"What!?"
"Yeah. I found him in the keep, sleeping on my pillow one day." I said. Anders gaped at me before he let out a bellowing laugh.
"I can't believe it! That damn cat!"
"Is the healer here!?" Someone said from the door. Anders good humor left.
"I-"
"I know. Go ahead. I can stay and watch or help, either way." I said. Anders smiled at me and kissed the top of my head.
All that anger, all that hate, all the betrayal, gone. It wasn't too relieving though because of what's-. Could I-? I wouldn't know, not yet.
I had to focus. I saw Anders heal a few more patients before I saw Hawke come in with her entourage from before. Fenris, Carver, and Varric.
"Nia?" Hawke wondered.
"Yo."
"What are you doing here?" She asked.
"I made up with Anders."
"Damn, you work fast Knives."
"I don't like letting things fester." I shrugged.
"You're getting red." Carver chuckled.
"Ooooh, dark, handsome mage got you going? Fenris, he's going to take her away from you." Hawke laughed.
"We are not together."
"And Anders is just a friend." I said, standing up to greet them. Anders came over after healing and looked at me, raising his eyebrow.
"Why are you red?" Anders asked.
"There is no reason!"
"So, map time and explanation time? With the whole glowy thing and abomination thing?" Hawke asked.
"I'm not an abomination but…you aren't wrong either. There…well…" Anders sighed. I stood by Anders.
"When we were in Amaranthine, a spirit crossed from the fade and settled into a body. This was Justice, or a spirit exemplifying that trait. Anders and him became friends and Justice saw how we were treating the mages and wanted to change that." I explained.
"Hmmm still sounds like abomination to me…" Hawke clicked her tongue.
"I offered to be his host. He had no other way of going back to the fade and I didn't want him to simply vanish. I thought, maybe a willing host...I just wanted to help him but…something went wrong. We wanted to change the Circle, to make sure no child was ripped away from his family because of the way he was born. I had too much anger…when I let him inside me he…changed."
"Let him inside you?" Hawke snorted before Carver bumped into her. "Well that spirit didn't look happy enough to give out cookies or something."
"And the Templars will think the same. He's a monster…" Carver said and I glared at him.
"Anders is not a monster and Justice wasn't a monster too. He saw the things that were happening to this world and not just to mages. He wanted to right what was wrong." I defended.
"Of course no good intentions went astray, even with magic." Fenris said sarcastically and we both glared at each other.
"Nia." Anders said, putting his hand on my shoulder. I scoffed. "I truly wanted to help Justice but my anger…whenever I see those Templars, things that used to enrage me take over me. I could never do anything about it before but now…he comes out and he is no longer my friend Justice. He is a spirit of vengeance…and has no mercy."
"…Shit, and I thought my problems were bad." Hawke mumbled.
"Always remember that someone out there has it worse than you Hawke." Varric said. Anders went to his table with the maps and gave it to Hawke.
"Here. These are the maps that are for this area. I will understand if you personally don't want me to join you. I cannot control Vengeance at times. I won't ask you to put yourself in danger with traveling with me. I will be here if you need me."
"My opinion on you traveling rests on her. She knows you better than all of us. So Nia, is Anders a monster? An abomination that will kill us once we turn our backs?" Hawke asked.
"No." I said.
"Then that is good enough for me. Drinks later?" Hawke wondered. I chuckled.
"Sure. I might as well go on home. Anders, please don't forget to eat. At least in Amaranthine you had some weight on you." I said, poking his cheeks.
"I'll try, ow!" I pinched him.
"You will and I'll force feed you if I need to."
"Fine."
"Aww how sweet!" Hawke said. I felt my face flush again. "Fenris, you have some competition!"
"We are not together!" We said at the same time. Varric laughed at us.
"The brooding couple, how original."
"I don't brood." We said again at the same time. Carver even laughed at us. I groaned.
"Come over on the Hanged Man Anders." I said.
"I wouldn't miss it." Anders smiled. We went out of his clinic as more people shuffled in.
"So…you and Blondie huh?"
"No! Jesus Christ, can you not pair me up with someone?"
"It's true Varric, she already has Fenris." Hawke reasoned.
"They are not going to give up, are they?" Fenris asked me.
"Nope. Keep on saying that Hawke and I won't give you free food anymore." I said. Hawke gasped in horror.
"You wouldn't dare!"
"Keep on joking and see." I laughed, as we went up the lifts.
"Huh, I never realized how you looked with a smile." Carver said.
"How I looked?"
"Well…you don't smile often."
"It's because Anders blonde hair showed her the light of the sun." Hawke said. I chuckled.
"That was a good one." I said, going toward the stairs.
"Then we'll see you at the Hanged Man…Carver stop staring at her." Hawke said.
"What? I wasn't." Carver scoffed and we all went our separate ways.
I hummed as I walked up the stairs. I felt…loads better. Karl's death was not hitting me too hard. I'll have to do something for Anders to make up for my mistake. I even had a skip in my step. Fenris looked at me funny until we got to the house.
"I did not know you were a mage supporter."
"I've met a lot of mages throughout my life like Anders and many of them good. They had power and chose not to abuse it."
"And yet I came from a magister that burned these on my skin." Fenris growled. I sighed and took off my armor in my room.
"Fenris, not every mage is bad."
"Those who have power will abuse it one day. Mages are no different."
"I know but just because I support my friend Anders doesn't mean I agree with him completely. Look at the Circle of Ferelden. It's free and they have implemented visits from family and travel. They are what the Circles need to be."
"Then you agree on retaining the Circles."
"Of course. It's better that mages go and learn about their powers in a safe environment but remember Fenris, you can't push a dog into a corner because it will bite. There has to be a balance between protection and enforcement. Templars are there to protect us from mages but they also protect mages from themselves. They're not there to kill them indiscriminately." I explained. Fenris' gaze softened.
"You have thought about it."
"Of course. I believe in the balance. Just because I'm Anders' friend doesn't mean that I won't stop him from going too far. I will."
"Good."
"Fenris…try to give him a chance though. Anders needs friends."
"No." Fenris said, leaving me in my room. I rolled my eyes and shook my head. Time to cook at least. My day was pretty normal after I met with Anders. I did a quick lunch and rested for a moment. I had some time to myself and I took it gratefully.
Anders was here and I forgave him yet, at the same time, there were still lingering emotions that I had bottled up. If I could explain it, it would be the exhaustion catching up with me. I held onto that anger for so long and now that I don't have it...there was something that was empty. It was a good empty but empty nonetheless. I was tired and really wanted to sleep. Unfortunately, there was no rest for the wicked.
I was cleaning the main hall, putting pots here and there that weren't broken. I had an idea to use them to get some trees, fruit trees. I had a smile this whole time. I felt…free. I sang loudly this time. A song about angels. As I put another bench into its place, I saw how it became dark outside.
"Hm, I guess this should be a good time to head out." I said. I walked up to Fenris' room and heard another bottle shatter. I groaned. "Fenris, what did I tell you?"
"This is my room and I can do as I please."
"You're going to hurt yourself. At least you finish the bottle…is that…you didn't finish the bottle! The wine is going to stain it!" I said, pointing at the wall.
"Why should I care?" Fenris scoffed.
"Because you shouldn't live like a pig. Come on, let's get drinks."
"I'm only drinking now so I don't get tempted by the Hanged Man."
"Ah yes because they suck. I see your point. Let's go." We went out the door and made our walk.
"You were singing rather loudly."
"I'm happy for once."
"It was not bad." Fenris commented. I laughed.
"Thanks. I'm a bit rusty though. I like those high notes."
"At least you are not tone deaf." Fenris said. I stopped for a second. "What?"
"Nothing, just an odd sense of déjà vu." I said. Anders said the same thing back in Amaranthine. These two were on the opposite side of the same coin. It was odd that there are so many similarities between them even when they are so different.
"What?"
"Nothing." I chuckled. We reached Lowtown and found Hawke with her siblings.
"Looks like we tend to meet each at the same time." Hawke chuckled with her brother and sister behind her.
"Hey Hawke." I said.
"And where is your boy toy number two?" Hawke said, giving me a suggestive elbow shove.
"What did I say Hawke?" I threatened.
"Shutting up then." Hawke said quickly. Bethany chuckled as I opened the door. That was when I heard a scuffle by the bar and my heart sank.
"There you are Hawke! Come on over." Varric said and Anders was there as well at the usual table. I looked over to the bar and prayed. Please, please don't notice me.
"Nia, come-"
"Is that…I can't believe it! It is you!" I heard a very familiar voice say. I looked over and Isabela saw me.
"…Shit." I said. Isabela giggled, ran over to me, and stuffed my face in her bosom.
"Wow, she is very popular isn't she?" Bethany said.
"Even with women." Hawke chuckled.
"Kitten! It's been so long!" Isabela purred.
"Yes, Yes it has been Isabela! Now can you let me, mmf-!" She made sure to hug me real tight and shoved her mouth on top of mine. I think I heard a cup drop and a few men whistle as she stuck her tongue down my throat as well.
"Jealous?" Hawke asked Fenris.
"Interested more like." Fenris said, staring. I gasped for breath and pushed, or tried to push, Isabela away.
"And after that magnificent night we had at the Pearl." She purred in my ear.
"That was one time!" I squeaked. Varric laughed as the heat was all around my cheeks, neck, and ears.
"An acquaintance perhaps?" Hawke asked. I pushed Isabela off but she brought me back and hugged me from behind.
"Does it look like it? Who's your friend?" I cleared my throat, trying to make my redness go away. It didn't work.
"Hawke, Isabela, Isabela, Hawke."
"I haven't seen you around. Be careful around here, men tend to grab at your tits and ass when you aren't looking." Isabela said, hugging me from behind and nuzzling into my neck.
"Can you stop!?" I squeaked. Isabela laughed and let me go. I put my face in my hands.
"I sense a story here." Hawke smirked.
"Stop staring at me!" I squeaked at everyone and Isabela chuckled.
"Let me properly introduce myself; I'm Isabela, Captain Isabela although that title is meaningless now that I don't have a ship. You and the others with you are Fereldan, aren't you? You have that look about you. I was just in Denerim as well."
"Probably binging yourself in the Pearl…" I mumbled and she brought me in closer to her again. I squeaked in protest. "Isabela!"
"Is your friend here by any chance looking for work? It seems that you and your friends might me the sort I need to get out of trouble." She said, holding me tight to her.
"Work?" Hawke eyes perked.
"Don't you dare Hawke!" I said.
"I'll hear you out. As long as my friend's head here doesn't explode." Hawke smirked. Isabela chuckled into my ear. I could not get anymore redder.
"I have someone from my past pestering me again. I've arranged for a duel and if I win, he'll leave me alone. The thing is I know that he won't play fair and I need someone to watch my back." She nuzzled my cheek and I cursed that I was so short that she could do that.
"That won't be too hard." Hawke chuckled.
"Good, I've arranged to meet Hayder at Hightown after dark. I'll meet you there." Isabela said, releasing me.
"Oh thank G-" She kissed me on the mouth again and I put my hand on my mouth as she walked away laughing. "Isabela!" She slammed the door as a few patrons looked at me. "What the hell are you looking at!?" I shouted at them with my voice cracking. They all laughed at me.
"What was that all about Knives?" Varric laughed.
"Nothing!" I squeaked out.
"That didn't look like nothing." Carver said. I sat down and slammed my head on the table. Anders laughed.
"Didn't expect that blast from the past did you?" Anders smirked.
"You know!? Spill!" Hawke said, sitting down.
"Anders if you value your balls, I suggest you don't." I growled.
"They're going to find out anyway, you might as well tell them or should I tell them? I'll even add in the juicy details." Anders teased.
"There are no juicy details because I can barely remember them! Those details were told to me by Zevran and he probably just amped them up!"
"Did he now? I've heard of what really happened that night when I went to the Pearl months ago." Anders said. My jaw almost hit the table. Varric laughed at me.
"Well? We're waiting." Carver said. Even Fenris chuckled.
"You see there was-" I put a hand over Anders' mouth.
"I had a threesome with my friend Zevran and Isabela, end of story." I said. Carver whistled while the rest laughed at me. "Oh I'm never living this down." I put my face in my hands.
"It must have been quite the experience if she remembered you and shoved her tongue down your throat." Hawke said. I groaned and hid my face. All I could hear were their laughs and Anders patted my head.
"Ok stop now, her ears are turning red." Anders said.
"Shut up Anders!" I squeaked.
"You didn't push her away though." Fenris said.
"I tried to!"
"It didn't look like that from our point of view." Bethany said. I growled and took a cup and downed it in one shot.
"Be quiet! I said my due, you guys can figure out the rest."
"You are so red!" Hawke laughed.
"Stooop!" They all laughed at me and I hid my face again.
"So are you coming then?" Hawke asked. I looked at her and thought about Isabela…
"Are you asking me or telling me?"
"You're coming!" Hawke decided. I groaned.
"Do you need us sister?"
"Might as well. We haven't gone all as a family for a while."
"All the Hawke siblings under one roof? Andraste guide the sorry bastards that'll fight you." Varric chuckled.
"You'll be all right? Isabela might attack you again." Anders said, shoving me.
"Up yours Anders." I mumbled. He chuckled but patted my head anyway.
"I'll accompany you too. See what she has to say." Varric said.
"Good then we might as well leave now rather than later." Everyone got up as we headed toward the door. Anders tapped me on the shoulder.
"Didn't your name-day just pass?" Anders asked.
"Huh, you remembered. Yeah, I'm twenty seven now. Yay me." I said flatly.
"I'll have to remember to get you something."
"You don't have to do that."
"I want to. Be careful Nia."
"I will." I said, shoving him slightly. He chuckled as he made his way back toward Darktown.
"Are you coming with Fenris?" Hawke asked.
"No. The mansion is this way, remember?"
"Ah Hightown. Do you think we'll really get the estate back?" Carver wondered.
"Are you doubting our mother's power Lord Carver?" Hawke teased.
"I'm just saying that it's going to take more than luck to get her old house back."
"Can't you at least be optimistic for mother?" Bethany asked. Carver huffed.
"For what? I say we should have stayed in Lothering. Haven't you heard? The Grey Wardens are trying to rid the taint in the land. If we can get back our old home-"
"It's going to take a really long time to cleanse it Carver. Try not to put too much hope on that." I said. He scoffed.
"This isn't our home."
"We can make it into our home Carver." Bethany said.
"Sunshine is right Junior. You have to let go of your old home, look at the now."
"Whatever." Carver rolled his eyes.
"Can you please not be an ass for one day?" Hawke said.
"So much drama in one family." I said.
"And yours was not like that?" Fenris asked.
"Ok, point taken." I said. Fenris left us to our own devices. We found Isabela waiting for us and she winked at me. I looked away.
"Good you're here but unfortunately I've been waiting and Hayder hasn't shown up. Not a single person has come. I don't like this."
"'I don't like this?' That's right next to, 'What could possibly go wrong?'" Varric reasoned.
"That's the whore we're looking for. Gut her!" A few fighters said coming our way.
"You had to say it." I said, shaking my head. I took out my daggers and ran for the people. Isabela ran for them too and jumped, both of her blades sinking into the messenger. I did a leg sweep at the other guy and smashed in his face. The archer next to me was shot by Varric. There were three more behind us and Carver took down two. Bethany let out a fire spell at one and his screams echoed as he burned to death.
"Hayder sent these ones." Isabela said and I rummaged through one, taking out a piece of paper. I gave it to her.
"Looks like he's hiding in the Chantry." I said, reading it over her shoulder.
"That coward. I won't stand for this. Come on." We ran after Isabela. Her tunic was way too short for her in my opinion.
"You're staring." Bethany said in a sing song voice.
"I'm not!" I said, my face flushing again. Isabela laughed. We found six more of Hayder's men waiting for us. Isabela did a crotch kick before slicing the guy's throat. I tackled one and did an upper cut to shatter their jaw. I evaded a few arrows while Hawke pushed three down. Two were frozen and Varric shattered them. Carver stabbed downward on one guy while Bethany set out her flames again.
"You do get results Hawkes." Five more came out and I did a high kick before using my foot to bring him down. Another shot at me before Varric got to him. Hawke finished off the one that I kicked by using her force spell. Isabela stabbed and slashed like no one's business and got two more. The last one Carver hit and Varric finished. Isabela went up the stairs.
"Remind me to loot these bodies once we're done!" Hawke said.
"Always have your eyes on the prize don't you?" I said.
"It seems that you have your eyes set already." Hawke teased.
"Shut up!" We opened the door to the Chantry. The ethereal glow of the moonlight peered in.
"Isabela. It figures you followed me here." Hayder said as we went in.
"Tell your men to burn the letters next time."
"Castillon shed real tears when he heard about your shipwreck and you didn't even tell him you lived."
"I'll send him a post card from the beyond the next time then." Isabela said. Hayder laughed as more of his men came out.
"Where's the relic?"
"I lost it. Castillon is going to have to do without."
"You lost it? Just like that time when you 'lost' a full ship of valuable cargo?"
"Those weren't cargo, they were people!"
"They were a hundred sovereigns per head and you let them flee into the wilds. Now the relic is gone too. Castillon is not going to be happy about that, I promise you."
"Maybe Castillon needs a new hobby. He should take up knitting." Hawke said.
"I can't let you tell him Hayder." Isabela said, taking her dagger and flinging it quickly into the woman's chest beside him.
"Nice shot." I said. Isabela ran to Hayder. Hawke pushed the other two lackeys away and Varric took one out. I followed his shots and stabbed my dagger's into a person's gut before knocking them out. Bethany froze the other two and Carver shattered them. Isabela stabbed her dagger into Hayder's throat and got her other dagger from the woman. Three more came in through the door. Bethany froze them all and Varric took two out before Hawke did another force spell and smashed the last one.
Two more came out and I did a leg sweep on both of them, an axe kick on one, and a stab through the throat on the last. Varric got the one on the floor. I flicked off the blood as the battle ended.
"Stabbity stab first and ask questions later?" Hawke wondered.
"It could have only ended like this. Castillon won't hear from me from Hayder but he will find me eventually. The only way to get him off my back is to get the relic, simple as that." Isabela shrugged.
"Well I'm good at finding miscellaneous things. I can help you find it." Hawke said.
"I don't have a clue where it could be but you will be the first one to know of it once I do. Anyway, thank you for your help with Hayder. I'll hang out with in the meantime. Kitten thinks your special enough to be her friend." She winked at me and I looked away with a huff. "Of course if you're interested in having…company, I'll be at the Hanged Man. That goes for you too Kitten."
"Shove it Isabela." I mumbled.
"That's what Zevran did to you." Isabela giggled. I felt my face flush again. She went out the door and Hawke looted.
"That…that…woman!" I growled.
"If I didn't know any better Knives, I'd say you have a thing for her."
"No I don't! It was one time! I was drunk!"
"So that's why you don't drink." Bethany chuckled.
"Whatever, I'm going home." I stomped away as they laughed at me. I made sure to check all alley ways as I went home to make sure I didn't get jumped by her. I made it back without incident. I let out a frustrated breath. I went up the stairs and into my room.
"I swear if she puts her mouth on me again I'll-"
"Back so soon?" Fenris asked. I stuck my tongue out at him and took off my armor. He laughed.
"Can you please stop laughing at me? I'm going to die of embarrassment."
"At least you are not scowling as much anymore."
"Screw you Fenris." I mumbled.
"Would you not prefer it if Isabela did it?"
"It was one time!"
"You're getting red."
"I dislike you so much right now!"
Finally a break from those really heavy chapters!
Chimera Spyke: I took that whole scene from personal experience. I've only hated two people in my whole life. One I forgave really easy when i realized I was more angry than anything. The other I still hate, mostly for a personal injustice. I can hold grudges but to people I care about? I just want to forgive. It's easier like that. So it's not Halo affecting me, just my own personality.
Buggy300: I'm glad you like it! Yes, that little part that was edited out was her mention the cure of Tranquility in the future and how she couldn't just say it outright because it's still a difficult process to do. The mess with Meredith won't happen until the last few chapters of the story. I haven't even got there!
Noswald: That comes later :3
Thank you Taffy and Sweetrolls, EG, Dforce76, Undeadhero143 (thanks for that bit), and WardenMahariel for reviewing! Please Review!