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Chapter Ten

Jane had to admit that it was one of the most peaceful pre-rehearsal wedding dinners that she had ever attended. As a matter of fact, she expected the worst to happen as if what she was now enjoying was simply the calm before the storm. A glass of Prosecco in hand, she observed the joyful comings and goings in the backyard. Everyone looked happy, at the soft mercy of a delicate lightness. Even Gina didn't seem to be too stressed by the event in spite of its importance.

"So when are you getting married?"

The question barely made Jane smile. The tone Isabella had used was full of a sarcasm that Jane didn't like. Her cousin was implicitly alluding to what had happened earlier in the morning when she had walked in on them in bed. Jane focused on the mischievous flicker in her cousin's eyes: Isabella loved being right, except she was wrong this time.

"I'd need to meet someone for that, no?" Jane shrugged, with an ounce of casualness. She could be just as subtle as Isabella if she wanted to. "I'm single."

"Really?"

Jane was living one of these incomprehensible days, when the melody of existence seems to irremediably be off-key. From her surprising wake-up in Maura's arms to the way she had consciously avoided her friend until now, she felt confused and lost. Each unexpected situation had stirred up a thousand emotions that she didn't know how to handle.

A bitter vulnerability reigned over the mess her heart had quietly left behind. And it was loud; loud and atrociously visible.

"I was sleeping. Maura... I don't know. She fell on me. She can be awkward, at times. She must have lost her balance or something."

"In bed? I don't know many people who happen to lose their balance in bed. You didn't even wonder why she was so close to you in the first place?"

The rhetorical question caused Jane to blush. Isabella's sharp tone of voice was probably the one she used when defending a client. She was an attorney, after all: it was her job to confront people with what they refused to see. And she was quite good at it.

A smirk curled up Jane's lips as the realization that she had lost the game hit her. Hurt but too self-conscious to abdicate, she looked her cousin in the eye and raised her chin in a gesture of defiance.

"Nothing has ever happened between Maura and I."

The music band finished their song. Isabella waited for the applause to subdue. With this typical self-confidence that had always made Jane green with envy, she raised an eyebrow then burst out laughing.

"It could be so much different though. You have to be blind to not see it. Anyway..." Isabella took a sip of Prosecco. She sighed. "It's not easy, even less with this family, but it's worth it. Believe me."

Isabella had always been a fighter to Jane's eyes for she had managed to take her distance with a life scheme that didn't suit her. There was nothing more complicated, nothing more painful to do. But her cousin had done it with an eloquence that Jane didn't own.

"By the way, where is she? Where's Maura?"

Jane squinted her eyes. She looked on her right, then on her left, but Maura was nowhere to be seen. Her heart sped up the pace of its beats: she wouldn't allow any of her aunts to kidnap Maura again. Roberta had been sneaky but Jane was now a lot more careful. She didn't want her friend to feel forced to do anything just to please intrusive relatives.

"She's playing scopa against the men and she's actually winning. They like her. As Antonio said, she's quite cool for an Irish girl."

Jane's dark eyes widened in fear. Under other circumstances, Isabella's remark would have made her laugh quite a lot but playing scopa was a male activity in her family. Of course, Maura couldn't know about it but Jane was certain that it would be seen as offensive by one of the guests.

She rushed to the aforesaid table without even excusing herself. She didn't need to, anyway. It was just Isabella. Trying to avoid an unneccesary conflict was way more important right now.

Just as expected, Maura was sitting at the table. She was nicely chatting with a dozen of men while playing with the old family's set of cards.

Panic passed underneath Jane's skin and caused her blood to rush through her veins.

She stayed in the background for long minutes. Thus she passed unnoticed to everyone which was exactly what she wanted. As a matter of fact, she even wished she could have disappeared for life was suddenly way too complicated. She observed her friend from this safe little bubble that she had just built for herself.

Maura's graceful traits shone in the sunset as her delicate smile lit up her hazel eyes then twirled in the air, gently embraced by her laughter.

She was at ease. There was nothing more surprising when one knew that social interactions weren't necessarily her thing. Jane passed her tongue over her lips, absentmindedly, then realized that she envied her friend's capacity to fit in so easily.

Maura belonged to an upper-social class. She hadn't grown up in the average suburbs of an average town. She had only known the best, from a very young age. Life in Staten Island couldn't be more different from her social background. Yet she was now conversing with Jane's uncles and cousins as if she had always known them, as if they were old friends.

She was succeeding where Jane had always failed.

"Jane!" Amadeo turned out to be the one who finally spotted her. "Your girl friend is a scopa master!"

Jane's lips curled up in a timid smile. The way her relatives kept on defining Maura as her girl friend was embarrassing. She felt uncomfortable because of the double-entendre of the word, even if she had a hard time thinking that her relatives had what it took to gently tease her about her and Maura's friendship.

For brief seconds, Maura's hazel eyes plunged into Jane's dark ones and everything stopped; everything but the beats of their respective hearts. Words weren't needed for the blurry feelings that had overwhelmed them both lie now in the bright light of the day. It didn't last. As usual, Maura and Jane simply turned their back at their emotions and resumed their endless game of hide and seek.

"I didn't know that you play."

"I spent a summer on an Italian island once, in a seaside village. The old men taught me the game... And their tricks. I hadn't played in a long while though."

Jane regretted to be wearing a dress. Her hands were burning and she wanted nothing but to make sure that they would sink in the pockets of her jeans. She clutched to her glass instead but remained desperately silent.

"Cazzate*! She's not even rusty."

Francesco's remark made the group that had gathered around the table burst out laughing which brought an immense relief to Jane. She wasn't sure to understand what was going on, why all these men who usually were so desperately clutched to their Italian family rules suddenly accepted Maura to break their so-called little rituals, but she had to admit that it was heartwarming.

"Would you like to play?"

The mischievous tone of voice matched the smirk that lit up Maura's hazel eyes as she looked up at her friend. She was challenging Jane, in front of her relatives. There was nothing harmful in her offer but a visible and electric tension grew between the two of them nonetheless.

The men whistled and Jane apologetically shook her head.

"You're gonna lose, Maura. You don't know what you've just asked."

Jane wondered if her friend hadn't had too many glasses of Prosecco for she was in a very flirty mood. In public. The uncles and cousins were unaware of the signs but Jane could see each one of them which caused a warm sensation to rise in her lower stomach. She swallowed hard then pondered the offer. But could she really turn Maura down?

"Alright."

Antonio gave her his seat and went to place himself next to Maura. Jane frowned. Was her uncle cheering for someone he barely knew while he had visited Angela the day Jane was born? It was a betrayal, an Italian betrayal.

That would call for a vendetta.

"What's going on here?" Lorena's loud voice interrupted the brouhaha of conversations. The short woman made her way through the small crowd. She gasped. "Perbacco*! Scopa is for men in this family..." She raised her arms to the sky then dramatically shook her head before looking at Jane and Maura again. "What's next? Two suits and a cigar each?"

"What's happening? Why are you screaming?"

Roberta showed up, soon followed by a dozen of curious relatives. Jane looked down at her lap as a strong sentiment of shame passed underneath her skin. She was simply about to play cards yet her family had to make a drama out of it. As usual.

She looked Maura in the eye and murmured away the most delicate apologies.

Maura responded to them with a smile, a bright one. She was extremely amused by the scene and how Jane's aunts seemed to see in her behavior something extravagant. She took a sip of Prosecco. The alcohol warmed up her stomach and reddened her cheeks.

"You're right, Lorena." Maura stood up and grabbed Jane by the hand. "Let's go dance instead. We're celebrating an upcoming wedding, after all. Let's have fun!"

...

*Cazzate: bullshit, lies

*Perbacco: holy cow