Chapter 10: Reconcile

Nostalgia

Disclaimer: I own nothing.

AN: I apologize if I made you wait too long. I have been very busy, but thanks to the Veteran's Day, I had a bit of time to write on some of my stories and beta-read on others. This chapter is a little long and it includes a bit of dialogue, since it's important and crucial for the future chapters. It's also awkward and fluffy and full of lemony goodness! I've been warning everyone! So, don't come complaining that this chapter was strong and whatnot... the story its rated M for this particular reason.

Reconcile

Resign oneself to something; accept; make peace; adjust

I sat in the living room couch, without moving. I was like a statue, still and unresponsive, not breathing or moving, as I stared down at Embry's sleeping form. I didn't want to wake him up. He looked so peaceful, as his head rested on my lap. Before he drifted off to slumber-land, I placed a pillow under his head to ease the tension of my marble-like flesh against his neck. I didn't want him to be uncomfortable. It felt good to have him near me. I felt somewhat alive and happy.

We'd spent all morning talking about trivial and important things about our lives. He laughed and joke about how dysfunctional our family was going to be, since I was a vampire and he was a werewolf (shape-shifter). But he was sure that we could make it work. He told me that it was going to need a lot of work, devotion and love from our parts to make it work, but he knew in his heart of heart that we could do it. He'd faith in me! He said so himself.

"I believe that we can make this relationship work, Madie." he said softly, as he stared down at the pizza that was in his hands. "I'm willing to fight. I know that you'll too, right?" he asked over his shoulder.

I nodded, smiling happily at him. "Yes, I'll fight." I whispered, as I looked down at my hands. My cold hands that someday, would be able to touch his warm body. "I want to fight for our family and for our marriage."

"Good," he said, taking a large bite of his pizza. "Mmm, this shit is delicious." he said with his mouth full.

The hours past by and I remained still, listening to the soft snores coming from Embry as he slept. I concentrated on the large box of the pizza, that was on the new coffee table that I had recently bought and a half empty 2-Liter bottle of Root Beer that sat beside the table. I looked around my apartment and for the first time since living there, I loved it. Embry's presence made it feel like it was actually a home. I knew that home was where my heart was (technically speaking, since mine doesn't beat anymore!), and it was with Embry. I could just picture my little children running riotously around the living room. I wanted them to visit me. I was dying to meet Kiki and I wanted to kiss her and touch her face. I also knew that everything needed to be taken in slow baby steps. I wanted Embry to trust me first. I didn't want to jeopardize anything!

I continued to stare at Embry's handsome face. His lips were partly opened and his long hair covered half of his face. His breathing was soft and I wanted to run my hand through his smooth face. I wanted to caress him and run my fingers through his hair. He'd looked much older than I'd remembered. His face was creased into a scowl, making him look angry. With a hesitant hand, I dared to touch his face. He flinched at the coolness of my touch. His heat of his skin encircled my hand and he reached for my hand and brought it to his lips and kissed it gently. I sighed, my heart swelling with happiness at the simple gesture. His scowl was gone, replaced with a serene and peaceful look on his face. He looked so elegant. He was truly a magnificent man. Everything about him exudes an aura of power, physical prowess and control. His shoulders were broad and muscular, his endless leg, were resting over the arm rest, since he was too tall to fit properly on the couch. I asked him if he wanted to move to the bed, but he declined my offer. He said that he was just going to take a short nap. It had been three hours and he was still sleeping. I could see the dark circles under his eyes and began to worry. Embry wasn't sleeping well. He was worried about something and I had a feeling that it was related to me.

I closed my eyes and leaned back against the couch. He still held on to my hand and I didn't mind. The proximity of his body was enough, for now! I began to muse about how our lives would be like if we were together. I wanted to believe that we could make it work. We were meant to be together, and now a lifetime had turned into forever. I thought of Kyra and the fact that she was going to live a normal life, beside Seth and it brought me to tears, except that I couldn't cry. I thought about not being able to save her from her destiny. At least she was going to be happy and loved. I knew that Seth was going to be everything for her. I also thought of Braxton's future. If I stayed near him, he was going to eventually become a werewolf. Would he hate me for it?

I sighed loudly and accidentally woke Embry up. He shifted on the sofa and slowly released my hand. "I'm sorry, Embry. I didn't mean to wake you up!" I said apologetically.

He blinked fast and sighed. "Hello," he smiled, as he yawned loudly, rubbing the sleep off his eyes.

"Hi," I said dreamingly, when I saw his powerful smile. "Did you sleep well?"

"Yeah, actually I did! Thanks," he said, as he raked his fingers through his hair and yawned again. "How long was I asleep for?" he said, as he extended his arms to touch my face.

"Two or three hours. I lost track, sorry. Why?" I asked, leaning my face in his hands.

He scowled and turned his head to the side. "I don't want to be late. I have to pick up Zeus from school at three thirty." he said solemnly. "He thinks that I'm going to ground him for calling you every night without my permission."

"Oh, I'm sorry." I said softly. "It's not his fault. I was the one that should've known- Um, that's in the past, Em." I paused and looked down at his puzzled look. "It's only one in the afternoon, sweetie." I said, as I managed to gather the strength to run my hand through his soft hair. "You're not mad at our son, are you?"

"No," he whispered and turned his head to the side. "I can't be mad at him for needing his mother." he said.

"Good!" I giggled, touching his dark thick hair. "You still have some time for me, right?"

"Yeah," he smiled impishly and sat up on the couch. "I got enough time for you, Madison." he chuckled and sat back against the couch.

We sat in comfortable silent for a few minutes; Embry continued to stare around the living room and into the kitchen. I knew that he was analyzing our situation. It was going to take be hard to make our marriage work, but I knew that we could do it. We had the most important ingredient to make a marriage work, love.

"How much do you pay for the apartment?" he asked curiously. "How many bedrooms does it have?"

I followed his line of vision and gnawed at my lower lip. I was hoping that he was making plans to move in with me, but it was too much to wish for.

"There are two bathrooms and two bedrooms. I pay five hundred and ten dollars a month, but I am going to buy a house next month. The neighbors might start complaining about the loud commotion that happened this morning with Sam and his pack." I laughed.

"I hear you." he chortled and ran his hand through his hair. "So, where are you thinking of moving?" he asked intrigued, his eyes avoiding me.

"I was thinking locally. You know here in Forks or the outskirts of the city. Maybe a large house with lots of ample space in the backyard for the kids to run." I said softly, as I placed my hand on his shoulder. "I want to be closed to the children and you, Em. I don't want to miss another day in their growth."

"That's good." he laughed nervously. "You've been away from us for too long."

"I'm not planning on leaving you again." I said nervously. "You are my life and- Well, I want to stay close to you. I want to, this might sound funny or even creepy, but I want to be with you all the time."

"There is a house that I have been meaning to see. It needs a lot of work and it's going to be an interesting renovation project for me and the crew, it's doable. Maybe you and I can go see it later this week."

"Um," I whispered shyly. "Sure, if you don't mind me coming with you. How many bedrooms and bathrooms? Does it have a large backyard... you know, opened to the woods?"

"I heard from Seth that it has four bedrooms." he said, turning his face to me. "Two and a half bathrooms. It's spacious and the backyard is large enough and it's opened to the woods and the best thing is that it's a few miles away from La Push."

"I want to see it." I mumbled. "I hope that-" I trailed off and shook my head. "Forget it." I smiled wearily at him and then stared out the window.

"I know." he smiled mischievously, as he forced me to look at him. "I can still patrol and be closed to the house if you were to need anything from me."

"Oh, yeah," I said, a little disappointed. "That's a wonderful idea."

I slouched my shoulder and nodded. "What's the matter? You don't like it, do you?" he said worriedly, as he took my hand in his.

"Oh, no! That's not it. I was just- forget it. It's not important. I was just thinking about something else."

He flashed me an annoyed look and sighed. "OK, Madison, you are going to have to start talking to me and tell me how you are feeling!" he grumbled. "I am not a mind reader. I need you to tell me what's in that little pretty head of yours."

"Ugh," I gritted. "I know, it's just that I want you to be with me always. I know that I'm being impatient and you are just thinking of the children, and I understand, but, ugh! I just want to be with you. I need to be with you..." I paused and inhaled deeply. "I need you." I whispered.

He grinned and pulled me closer to him. "I understand. We'll be together. I promise. We'll get through this rough patch. It just takes time, Madison. We have all the time in the world."

"I know we do!" I said desperately. "But my kids are growing so fast! I have missed so many years. I don't want to miss another day." I complained.

"You still whine a lot." he laughed and tousled my hair. "Mad, you don't mind if I use your bathroom. I would like to take a shower, if you're Okay with it, of course." he said sweetly.

I nodded. "Oh, no, go ahead." I said, smiling at him. "I'll get you some clean towels." I was still holding his hand, when I got up from the couch and stared down at him. "Come, I'll show you where the bathroom is."

"Thanks," he said timidly.

He got up from the couch and followed me. I sauntered down the narrow hall and entered my room. He continued to after me and turned on the light of the room. "It's a little dark." he said, smirking.

"I'm sorry, I forgot that- well, I can see so well in the dark, that I don't bother turning on the lights. You know, it saves energy and in a way, I am protecting the Earth." I said bashfully.

"Kiki is afraid of the dark," he said, as he tucked his fist in his front pockets.

"Is she? Why?" I asked sadly. I wanted to wrap my hands around my daughter and just hold her and tell her that everything was going to be alright. That I would never let anyone hurt her. I wanted to chase away he nightmares that threatened to destroy her peaceful dreams.

"I don't know." he shrugged and leaned against the dresser. "I like your room. It's big and neat."

"Thanks," I said casually, and at human pace, continued to search for a clean towel.

"Sometimes the kids sneak into my bed at night. It's good that your bed is a king size bed. It'll fit us all together." he said, eying me suspiciously.

"Um, yeah." I swallowed hard. If I had a heart, it would be pounding hard against my chest. I nodded softly and turned to the closet. "That's real nice. You are a lucky father."

He laughed heartedly and reached for a strand of my loose hair. "You wouldn't mind if the kids and I came over and took over your apartment and room for a weekend, right?" he asked cautiously, as he scrutinized me with his eyes.

"Not at all." I laughed. "I would love that very much."

"Good," he said with resolve.

I gave him a weak smile and turned around to search for the towels. I was panicking; he was suggesting so many wonderful scenarios, where my children were in it. I could just picture my angels laughing loudly and running happily in my apartment. I placed my hand over my still-heart and sighed softly. I couldn't believe that he was thinking of spending a night in my bed, with our children filling this empty apartment with their laughter and smiles. It's like an early Christmas present. I was happy and I just couldn't contain myself.

"When would you like to stay over?" I said, trying hard to play it cool and casual. "I can buy games, food and stuff for you and the children. I just need to know when you might be coming; have everything ready for them."

He began to pace around the room, stopping in front of my bed and picked up the frame that was on the night table. "Zeus and you look cute in this picture." he said, as he smiled at the picture. "I'm glad that you reached out for him. He's gonna be happy to know that he'll be staying with you."

"It was nothing. I didn't know that he was my son, until he started talking. I was glad that I did."

"So, what do you think we should do?" he asked impishly, as he walked back to where I stood.

"Um, about what?" I asked nervously.

"About this Friday." he specified.

"Oh," I sighed softly. "I, um, I don't know! Do you have any suggestions?"

He stood a few inches away from me, his arms crossed over his chest as he stared attentively at me. "Well, I was thinking that maybe, um, if you want to, I can bring them over this Friday after I get out of work and we can go out to eat... sorry, bad idea, right?"

"Oh no, Embry." I said, placing my hands on his arms. "It's perfect. I won't eat, but I don't mind sitting in a restaurant with you guys. I can drink water, at least." I laughed embarrassed.

"Water?" he laughed.

"Yes, I can drink water!" I said, smirking at him.

"Well, OK, perfect." he said. "That's a load off my shoulders. I thought that if I said that, I would be insulting you."

"Oh, no, no, the other way around. I feel like I am ruining a magical family evening. But, Em, I would be delighted to spend time with you and the children. It's like a dream come true! I get to spend time with my family and I also get to spoil the babies."

He laughed and leaned forward and kissed my forehead. "I'm glad." he said shyly. "I know that Zeus is going to be excited when he hears the news that he'll be with his mother."

I gnawed at my lip and stared up at him from behind my eyelashes. "You raised him wonderfully! He's the perfect son, Embry." I said proudly.

"Yeah, he is!" he said with pride. "He loves you very much, Madie."

"I- don't know what to say," I said happily. "I love him too. I mean, I love Kiki too, but I don't know her. I love them equally, but I guess that Zeus was my first child and I remember faint memories of holding him in my arms and of him falling asleep on my chest... I remember you the most, though." I said gloomily, as faint memories of my little boy ran through my head. I wanted to remember everything, but I couldn't. I walked back to the closet and took a couple of the folded towels and handed them to him. He thanked me and trailed after me, as I showed him the bathroom.

"I'll wait for you out here, Embry." I said timidly.

He laughed sensually, as he removed his shirt. "Do you want to join me?" he asked naughtily. "I promise that I won't do anything you don't want me to do."

I laughed and nodded. "If you want me to."

He took a few steps towards me and placed his hands on my waist. "Did it hurt?" he asked curiously.

"What hurt?" I asked confused.

He ran a hand through my hair and sighed. "Becoming a vampire," he said solemnly.

"I don't remember any of it. I guess that the painkillers they had me on after the emergency cesarean helped with the pain of becoming a vampire." I said glumly, as I played with the waistband of his jeans. "I woke up one night and Cheyenne was sitting in the smelling room with me. Her eyes were red and she... I hate her. I remember looking down at my stomach and I was flat. I didn't have a heartbeat and I was dead. My skin was granite-like. There was no baby inside me anymore. I looked around and didn't find you or Braxton. I lost it when she told me that I was a vampire and that she did it to spite you!"

"I'm sorry." he said solemnly.

I shook my head and touched his temple with my hand. "Don't be, love." I said sadly. "I, I try not to think of it. If I do, I'll become crazy and I'll want to kill her. It's worthless."

Embry growled, his forehead creasing into a scowl. "I'll kill her for you! I swear that I'll destroy her for ruining our dream of growing old and gray together; for taking you away from me and the children. She better pray that she never crosses my path, because that will be the end of her." he snarled.

"It's not worth it. Hate is not worth it." I said, running my hand up his arm. "I've been through hell in the past five years without you. And now that I found you again, I don't want to think of hate, Embry. Life with you is all that I want and crave. I don't care what happened in the past... with Cheyenne. She'll live with the guilt of turning me in to a vampire. There are more important things than to succumb to revenge. Life is too beautiful to wasted worrying about such things. I rather live my eternity loving you and enjoying our time together with our children. I want to create new memories with you."

"You are important to me Madison." he whispered.

"Thanks, Embry. I need to hear you say that!" I said, turning around to face the closet. "You are worth everything in the world." I was still afraid of seeing the rejection in his eyes.

"You are my everything, Madison, I never stopped loving you!" he said, his arms encircling my waist, as pressed my back to his chest. The towels fell to the floor, but I didn't care. Being this close to him, was what I have been dreaming of for the past five years.

"I never stopped loving you either. You are my true love, Embry. I love you so much." I said, as I turned around and stepped on the towels.

He smiled and began to study me with his eyes. He tilted my face to the side and began to kiss the base of my neck and collarbone. "I'm glad that you were tan-skinned when you were human, because you don't look as pasty white and pallid as the rest of the vampires that I've met. You really don't look like a vampire; you look healthy, except without a blush. I miss your brown eyes, though. But you are even more beautiful, I have to give you that, but you look perfect as always. You were always perfect, Love." he said in a husky voice.

He took my face in his hands and kissed my cheek softly. "I love you." he whispered, as he pressed me closer to him in an embrace. "I like the smoothness of your skin." he whispered into my ear, as his lips began to leave a hot fiery trailed on my collarbone and neck. "Hmm, you smell so divine, Madison." he groaned, as his free hand, held my waist firmly.

"Embry," I moaned, as I stood there pinned against the wall, unable to move, hell, I didn't want to move from that spot. I wanted to feel the warmness of his body engulf me. "I love you so much."

"Your eyes are dark... are you hungry?" he said, as his hand crept up my flat stomach. "Are you hungry, Love?" he asked sensually, as he pulled away from me, and glanced at me quizzically. "You know that if you bite me, I will die. You don't want me to die, do you?"

"No, never!" I said frightened, as my hands touched his broad and muscular chest. "I'm not hungry. M-my eyes get dark, w-when I'm, when I desire something. I-I don't want to kill you, ever. You are my second chance at love and at life. I would never hurt you. Embry, I am not, well, I am not poisonous. I don't have venom." I said, as I looked down at his chest.

"You aren't venomous?" he asked curiously, laughter in his voice.

"Yeah, Carlisle examined me. I have no poison in me." I said embarrassed, as his eyes continued to stare at me.

"Awesome." he whispered, as he lowered his head and kissed the corner of my lips. "I was afraid to do that." he said, as he pulled away from me and swept me off my feet.

"I," I whispered, as he carried me to the bed. Damn, Rosalie was so right! This bed was going to come in handy someday. I needed to buy my sister a thank you present for foreseeing my future love life.

He gently placed me on the bed and tenderly began to tug at the hem of my shirt. "There are too many clothes between us, Madison." he said playfully, smiling devilish at me. "We need to solve this problem."

With trembling hands I began to undo the buttons of my shirt. I didn't dare to look at him. It was the first time that I would be intimate in my new vampire body. I was too excited, afraid, nervous and delirious with the prospect of making love to him. I knew that I should've waited, at least, until I knew that things were going to be better between the two of us, but my body demanded to feel him inside of me. I couldn't deny my soul this privilege. I wanted to feel his weight on top of me. I wanted him so much.

When I discarded my shirt, I gasped in awe, when his hand touched my breast. I inhaled deeply, staring at his perfect and muscular chest in front of me. I've seen him a few weeks ago, but today, my senses were heightened and my desire to touch him increased with every breath that I took. I wanted to kiss every dent and valley of his broad chest. Oh, men, his body was like a playground where I knew that I would experience hours of endless joy. I took off my shoes and bras and sat there; my bare chest exposed for him to see.

"Wow," he whispered as he scooted closer to me. "I forgot how precious and perfect your body was. I need to be reminded of how you taste and feel under my touch, Madison." he said, placing a hand over my chest and gently pushing me down on the bed.

His eyes never left me. I felt excited and nervous at the same time; waiting anxiously for what he would do to me. He stood up from the bed and finished unbuckling his pants. I knew that there was no turning back. I basked in the knowledge that he would soon be inside of me, liberating my heart from all those lonely nights that I'd experienced without him. When he finished removing his jeans, he crawled on the bed beside me and aligned his body parallel to mine. There was a wicked smile on his lips as he dipped his head towards mine. Our lips were mere inches away from each other. His hand moved up and down my body leaving me breathless and agonizing for his warmth.

"I want you so bad, Madie." he whispered, as his mouth claimed a taunted nipple. "But I want to take my time with your body. I need to know what you want me to do to you. Please, Madison, tell me." he pleaded, as he lifted his face to me and kissed me feverishly.

I clasped his face in my hands and forcefully brought him closer to me. He gently climbed on top of me and began to kiss me fervently. He tangled his hand in my hair and softly pulled at it. His other hand roamed freely over my body and stopped by the waistband of my jeans. His lips continued to kiss me as he pressed his chest against the mound of my breast. A loud moan escaped his mouth, when I reached to touch his bulging erection.

"Mmm," he moaned, as he smiled against my lips.

"Touch me, baby!" I whimpered, my hands gently squeezing his erection.

His free hand reached for my breast and he stroked it softly. With his fingertips he tugged at my right breast's nipple, making me moan loudly. He kissed my chin, my neck and collarbone and continued to leave a trail of velvety kisses, until his mouth covered my entirely breast. The warmth that engulfed me was inexpressible. His tongue rasped against my harden nipple. The flicking of his skillful tongue intensified my need to desperately touch him. With his other hand, he began to unbutton my jeans. I lifted my pelvis to help him remove my jeans, but I suddenly heard a loud ripping noise and my jeans were flying across the room.

"They were blocking me, baby." he said mischievously, as he looked up at me, from behind those long dark eyelashes. "We'll go shopping for new pants later, I swear."

"Embry," I said, clasping his face in my hands and pulling him up to me. "Embry, is this what you want?" I asked seriously.

"What do you mean?" he asked befuddled, his fingers still tugging at my breast.

"Do you want me only for today? Or do you want me in your bed forever? I need to know!" I said earnestly. "Because I want you for always!"

"I," he whispered and smiled at me. "I'm yours, baby girl. I fucking need you in my bed forever and always. Damn, sweetie, I love you and I can't be away from you anymore." he said, as he ravished my lips in a hungry kiss.

I parted my lips and welcomed his tongue, as it explored every corner of my mouth. I moaned, when his hand continued its trek down my breast, to my stomach and stopped by the waistband of my thongs. "Let me in, Madie-baby," he said breathlessly, as his fingers pulled down at my thong. I nodded and bucked my pelvis upwardly, and felt his warm fingers, slid between my legs and separate the intimate folds of my womanhood.

"Hmm, yes," I said fervidly. He continued to run his index finger up and down, until I was wet and sleek. Being a vampire enhanced every touch to the maximum. I felt like I was covered on fire, as Embry continued to hover over me. "I want you inside me, baby." I moaned.

"Not yet," he grunted, as he pressed a finger inside me and with his thumb continued to massage my clit. I felt the bubble of desire start to expand inside my womb. I was slowly being swept by the desire and my need to be covered with his love. I wanted to feel him inside me. I was slowly losing my cool and I was slowly being pushed too close to the edge and soon, I would be falling. "Just a little longer, baby." he laughed seductively. "Give me a few more minutes to enjoy your new body." he said, his voice drenched in desire.

I nodded and ran my hand through his body, enjoying the satiny feel of his warm skin. I envied him. He was always going to be warm and so human. I pushed the saddening thought out of my head and concentrated on how amazing his hand felt on my skin. I glided my hand down his waist and rested it on his growing erection. I could hear the blood rush to his cock. I gently squeezed his dick and slowly moved up and down. He moaned loudly and closed his eyes, as I continued to rub him.

"I want you inside of me, Em." I said huskily. He nodded and positioned his cock at the entrance and slowly began to enter me. I felt the fire of his penis blazing hot against my sleek walls. I could feel the pressure of his penis as it continued to drive deeper inside me. He slowly pulled out and I groaned with disappointment. I wanted to continue feeling the heat of his sheath penetrating me. "Don't, Embry." I whimpered. He smiled and kissed my lips and entered me, this time with much force.

"I won't cry if you want to drive inside me harder, Em." I said, a smirk on my lips. He took it as an invitation and began to plunge inside me with such strength that I held on to the bed sheets. It felt good, to be united with my husband in such an intimate way. The coldness of my skin slowly vanishing with the heat of his body. "Put all your weight on me."

"I don't want to hurt you, princess." he said, his face in a concentrated expression. "Mmm, so fucking tight."

I placed my hands on his waist and swiftly turned us around. I was on top of him and he was under me. I began to move my pelvis in a circular motion, eliciting delightful moans from Embry. His hands began to caress my body and breast. He kneaded my right breast in his warm hand and gently pulled the nipple between his fingertips.

"Ride me harder, Madie." he ordered, and I complied. "Yes, like that, ugh, so fucking good." he moaned loudly. His hands moved to each side of my waist and pinned me down against his cock.

"I love you, silly girl." he whispered, as he sat up on the bed, still inside of me, and wrapped my legs around him. "I love you so much, Madison." he panted, as he continued to move inside me.