Kai was quiet and with drawn as she sat in the privet room she had been given in the medical ward, she was sitting curled up in the window seat, looking out past the garden, at the growing storm clouds as they began to appear along the horizon.

Lenalee, Allen and Lavi had come to see her -Link in tow- hoping to cheer her up, but she had just told them she was tired and needed to sleep, sitting there in silence until they left her alone at last. They had said that she shouldn't listen to what they thought, Allen had even admitted to feeling the same way when he had first been under suspicion because of the Ark. He advised her that it was only gossip, that things would change soon enough and that she shouldn't listen too closely to anything that people said about her.

She had nodded to them all, but her mind still replayed there comments, hurtful and spiteful little comments. Trying to pull her legs even tighter against her chest, one hand curled tight on the blanket around her shoulders, she rested her head on her knees and fell asleep…

---

"You had a fight again didn't you?" She asked as she walked into a scene of destruction in the living room. The mess was usual in a house of nine, but the little signs told you there had been a fight. Anything that could have been thrown had, the cushions and TV remote were included on this list along with a handful of shoes. The two sulking teenagers in the middle of it all were dead give away.

Karl was sitting on the sofa with a football magazine in his hands and a hand under his nose to try and stop the blood, while Katrina was on the floor looking at a broken pair of shoes in her lap. Both of them were crying still, but neither was looking at the other or at her.

"Come on, there's need to be like this." Kai said as she walked into the room and began to tidy up around them both, mostly to make sure nothing belonging to there parents had been broken. "Who's going to be the first to tell me?"

"His fault!" Mumbled Katrina from the floor only for Karl to straighten up and snap out, "was not! She started it all!" Kai left the room, moving into the kitchen and getting some paper towels, a small dish of water and a bag to put the dirty tissues in. They were still arguing back and forth over who's fault it was when she came back in and put the things in front of her smallest brother, before moving on to the youngest sister and taking the shoes out of her hands.

"Karl clean your face up and I'll fix these up for you okay?" Looking down at the sulking girl, she saw that there were one or two little bruises on her arms but nothing like a bloodied nose. "But only if you promise to not fight about whatever it was anymore!"

The both broke out into plea's of innocence, blaming the other for one reason or another but Kai lifted her hands up and shouted for quiet, "Katrina, I'll not fix these at all unless you do as your told, I'm brake them past fixing!" The youngest girl shut up quickly and glared but Kai softened her gaze and smiled, pulling a small pot of glue out of a draw. "Now go help Karl clean his face up while I fix this."

Kai flipped on the TV so she wouldn't have to hear anymore silly comments and sat down with the shoes on her lap, carefully opening the small pot of super glue. It took her a whole five minuets to fix the shoes, replacing the heel and making sure the strap was lined up properly, then looking on the floor for the tacky plastic jewels and bow that were supposed to go on the front of them.

"Now leave them to dry and don't be so pissy next time, I only just got back from work." She said, leaving the shoes to dry and giving them both a glare, turning to leave she heard the muttered, "thank you Christine" from behind her and carried on up the stairs to get changed. She never got thanked normally and never asked for it. She was a big sister and that's just the way things were, no one thanked you, no one comforted you and everyone expected things from you.

Opening her bedroom door she froze as it opened into the gardens at the Black Order, the sunlight and breeze feeling real but there was no sound of the sea lapping the shore or the birds singing, just the small group chatting lightly. She saw the small group of people sitting on the grass and watched again as the Finders came around the corner, there silly comments floating ahead of them. She saw herself get up and move away, tears falling down her cheeks as she ignored the others calling to her, but then the scene faded to show her new room in the Order, in the Infirmary still.

They were all standing there, Lenalee, Allen, Lavi, even Link seemed to be concerned as he loitered in the doorway. They were worried for her, trying to make her feel better and she had just brushed them off to sit in her room and sulk. She hadn't acted like that in a long time, never had the chance really, with looking after everyone… no one had ever gotten in to proper arguments with her because as oldest sister she would just hit them round the back of the head till they started doing as they were told.

The comments had been hurtful still…

--

With a jolt Kai woke up and looked groggily up at the nurse leaning over her, a worried look on her face from finding her charge asleep in the window seat. It was cold now as the rain beat against the glass, she was worried Kai would catch a chill as she gently pulled the girl away and towards her bed, helping her sit on it as she checked for a temperature, then checked the stitches.

"I-I'm okay, I just feel asleep that's all." Yawned Kai and then smiled faintly, a little embarrassed, "do you know what time is it please?"

"Oh, its only about three in the afternoon," replied the nurse with a glance at her watch. "Those storm clouds make it seem so much later! It was so nice earlier too," the nurse sighed and then looked down at her charge. "Are you hungry? I could get Jerry to send something up if you don't want to go to the Dining hall alone."

"I am a bit hungry, but I'll be okay to go on my own. I'm a big girl now." The nurse laughed and passed her a light jacket, urging her to ware it as the storm had brought a chill to the Order. She didn't want her getting ill when she was just getting back on her feet again.

Making her way down to the hall, she stopped as she saw her group of new friends sitting not too far away and smiled to herself. Ignoring the looks and murmurings from those gathered in the hall, she made her way over, glad that they were equally ignorant of the general murmurings that always filled the hall. Allen was at the end of his meal but still nibbling on something, Lenalee was stirring a cup of tea in front of her, they were sat side by side, there eyes on Lavi as he spoke, loudly waving his arms as he did.

Sneaking up on Lavi as he continued to ramble on about a girl he had seen in town, she saw Lenalee' eyes shift to look her, holding a finger in front of her lips she smiled as the girl smirked but returned her gaze to her red haired friend. "Found you!" She shouted behind him, hands grabbing hold of his shoulders with clawed hands at the same time, to add an extra factor of fear.

"No panda! I swear!" Screamed Lavi, covering his head with his arms and cowering as the entire group cracked up. "I'll do it before-before the… Kai?" The long haired girl was howling with laughter and sitting sideways on the bench besides him, holding her side as leaned on the table.

"S-sorry Lavi, I couldn't h-help myself," she said with a faint chuckle as the laughter started to die down a little, "I don't think I'll ever get that chance again and it just reminded me of when we met the other day. Now we're even."

The red faced young man chuckled a little to himself, one hand behind his head as he hoped Bookman didn't really find him, "I guess, but I didn't flip you into any water."

Kai shrugged "maybe one day you'll get your chance" and lifting her other leg over the bench she sat down properly, looking across at Lenalee and Allen, giving them a smile and a wink as they grinned back. "I'm sorry about earlier." She apologised looking at them all again before down at her hands, she was fiddling with the end of her braid. Her smile was still there but now it was shy, "I guess it was just a little hard hearing everything said like that."

Lenalee reached across and touched her hand, taking it in her own as she tried to reassure the nervous girl, purple eyes staring into black, "we are Exorcists and we will always be a little…" her eyes drifted to the side as she tried to find the right words, memories filling her before she snapped back, her soft gaze returning, "different to everyone else. What we go through, destroying Akuma, fighting the Noah… they can never understand any of that. Its there ignorance that makes them speak like that."

Kai nodded, her shy smile never fading, "I understand now, I just needed time to think it over that's all. Remember who I am really."

"Have your memories come back?" Asked Allen casually, he was nibbling on a plate of deserts, one hand was holding tight to Timcanpy who was fighting to try and get one of the little cakes off of the plate. Kai shook her head and fiddled with her braid again, "no, but I'm worried that being the way I am, I'll forget my memories of my family, my past, who I am."

"But that's all part of growing and changing," said Lenalee, she swiped a cake off the tray and passed it to the golem as Allen pouted. "I can't remember anything about being in China except living with my brother and his dreadful cooking."

"Hmm, true, but you still have your brother here. I want to hold on to my memories without letting them rule me. The thing that I cannot forget it that I was… still am, oldest of seven and its my duty in life to guide and care for others, older or younger than myself. Blood relation never meant anything before and still won't." The group looked at her as she said this, her hands tightening on the thick rope of hair over her shoulder, "I may eventually forget there names, there faces, even the things we did together, but I can't forget what I was raised to do. I'll just make the whole world my family, everyone around me will be my kin and I'll do my best to look after them all! In honour of the memory of my family that I'll never be with again!"

Lavi looked away from this, his mind once again replaying Bookman's word about not being attached, not caring. They seemed to flow threw his mind at least once a day since Road had tried to make him choose, but he was still walking that line, that finest of lines.

Lenalee was fighting back tears and holding onto Kai's hand again saying that she had never had a sister before, that she had always wanted someone she could look after and protect. Kai blushed at her own words, not realising she had said them out loud like that, with so much passion. Allen meanwhile was looking down at his own left hand, seeing the faint line of black skin between his glove and his cuff. He had sworn to love them, Akuma and humans alike. It was hard sometimes, especially since this included Kanda on the list of humans, but he still did. It seemed there were others that would try and take on such an incredible task.

"Come on," said Lavi at last breaking the quiet that had settled on the group, "lets go see if there's something to do in the science department?"

[A/N: um, guys, I don't want to beg or demand, but could people please start leaving reviews? My confidence it's flying high with 10 chapters and 9 reviews. Sorry, just would like to know what you think... and my little brother is asking questions, you wouldn't want to disappoint him would you? ;)