(Youko)

Sei said last night that she would tell me something. I wonder what it is. I'm hoping that it is a good news and not something that would make my world shattered into pieces. Because the moment I saw her with shiori last night, it almost break my heart. I mean, how would you fight for something if the both of you are not together, and how would you fight for your love if you knew that your opponent is someone whom your love swear that will always love for forever, that she decided to close her heart to anyone because of the hurt that she felt. Maybe, I should thank Yumi, because she managed to at least open the window of Sei's heart and eventually she also managed to open the door. Yeah, I bet... I really need to thank her for that. Hmmn... the last night's conversation was a bit...well, complicated, we still do not know each other's decision about the last thing we've talked about before I leave for Europe. Maybe she would tell her decision to me. I can't wait!

Last night was well... okay... one of the memorable in my opinion.

...............................................................

After the scene made by Satou Sei herself... we join the others; they were playing the never-ending game of truth or dare. Well... more of a.. 'i-dare-you-to-do-this-to-your....' Everyone was grilled, as in everyone including that bitch. Well, most of the questions there were kinda petty... it's like we've known each other's lives that we don't need to probe deeper or ask question that's already known by the others. But the thing that caught my attention was not a question... but a dare from Eriko to her petite soeur. I also noticed that the others were shocked by the incident.

"so.. my dear petite soeur... truth or dare?"

"uh.. dare?"

"hmmn... kiss the person you admire the most in the council... except for me of course.. hahaha.."

I looked at Rei to see her reaction; she immediately went ten shades of red. Ohh.. this is interesting...

"where?" she asked..

"just on cheeks... silly.. someone might kill you if I said you kiss her on the lips right?"

And well.. she stood up.. then walk towards my direction.. and kissed me on the cheeks. I heard gasp from everywhere. I looked at yoshino to see her awkwardly calm, then at Eriko who was... grinning from ear to ear... afterwards, I felt Sei's grip on my hand tighten.

"jealous are we?" I whisper to Sei's ear.

"why would I?" she said.. then she shift her gaze to Rei.. "aha! So rei-chan.. admires our Ms. Lillian huh."

"that was.. that.. that was before Sei-sama.. and—"

"you don't have to explain Rei.. really..." Sei teased.

"Sei..." I said

"just teasing..." she answered.. giving me her famous satou-grin.

"please.."

"okay..."

And presto the discussion was finish.

After sometime, they decided to end up the little party they had for me. I was surprised when Sei grabbed me and pull me into an embrace.. "I missed you so much. don't leave me huh." She muttered.

"I missed you too... I won't" I assured her..

Then they went home.

.....................................................

I took a cab all the way from my house to her apartment. Since she's on the second floor, I would just take the stairs... and I think she wouldn't mind if I would be late for just a bit. Sei's room is just located three doors on the right after the stair cases, so I think it would just be okay. Just as I stepped on the last staircase, I heard a jovial voice.

"oh Sei! I love you!" 'did I heard it right?'

My curiosity had caught me off guard. it feels like I was glued on the floor, I'm fighting back the sobs that are already resting on my throat, and I blink so many times to avoid the tears from falling, because in front of me, is Sei... with Shiori in her arms, they were kissing passionately, and looked so sweet together. I feel so numb because of the pain, I felt so stupid for believing that she could have love me. but I guess I was wrong. And I have to accept the fact that I'm just a friend nothing more, nothing less. She could have said it in front of me that she decided to dump me from someone from the past, and not this way, but I doubt that she knows that I'm even here. Those two are so oblivious with the things happening outside their world. They're seemed so absorb with each other. And then they broke the kiss, and no matter how I wanted to run away my feet seemed to be stuck on the floor, until Sei accidentally looked on my spot. She was obviously shocked by my presence, so she eventually freed herself from the embrace.

"y-Youko...?" she said. And right on cue she walked towards me, she held me in my shoulders. And I know that I have to regain all the sober part in me... I have to wake up from my illusions that she would love me, that she cares for me. "Youko I—"

"why didn't you tell me that you're back in each others' arms Sei?" I ask calmly—err am I calm?

"Youko..."

"uh.. I get it.. so this is the thing you wanted to say to me?" I said... "I-I'm happy for you" I immediately added.. then she held my hand... I have to go now.. because what's happening right now just ripping me apart... and if this keep on going... I might lose all the sober parts of me... and hell! I wouldn't allow that.

"Youko.. I just want to--"

"Sei, I remember just now.. that I have to meet Eriko. Bye Sei.. and really.. I'm happy for you." Then, I turn around and leave. After exiting the building... tears just roll from my eyes. I really can't help it. I need to let go of it before this feeling eats me alive.

I wasn't looking on my way... and it made me bump into somebody.

"Youko-sama?" at first I didn't notice whom the person was. "daijoubo?" she asked. so I raised my head up and came face to face with tall blonde.

"I'm okay, Rei."

"you doesn't seem to be. Are you crying?"

"no.." I said. And she didn't say anything.. "rei.. I have to go now."

"I-I'll drive you home.. I bet.. you didn't use your car."

"rei.. really.. it's okay.."

"I insist."

"okay." Even though I don't want to... I still do it.. I don't want to be rude to anyone because of the things I'm feeling right now.

(Rei)

Youko-sama was silent the whole ride to her apartment. I wonder what happen... as much as I want to talk to her, I guess I'm not the right person she should talk with. I better call onee-sama later so that she could talk to her.. but as of now.. the only thing I could do is just stay beside her... she needs some strength from someone right now.. I know I'm not that strong but she's too vulnerable that I can't help but care for her.

We arrive in her house an hour before lunch so I volunteered that I would just cook for her and also to have an excuse to call onee-sama. But Youko-sama said that she won't be eating... and she just one to have time alone—she muttered a thank you before making her way to her room. I just settle for calling my onee-sama... Onee-sama said that she will be here in an hour or two because she needs to wait for little Chaia to wake up.

I wonder what Youko-sama is doing right now.. probably sleeping or thinking again. she's been thinking about things ever since... I wonder if it's Sei-sama... I always see her looking at Sei-sama with worried eyes and everything. she looked so hurt when I saw her earlier, seems like she's not the Youko-sama I knew that was filled with overflowing confidence, she looks more of a delicate piece of porcelain doll that any minute she might break into thousand pieces. I wonder if she already knew what had happen last night... but the way I see things last night I didn't think that onee-sama said it to her because last night she and Sei-sama were so sweet to each other, Sei even steal a kiss or two if Youko is not looking.

After an hour, I heard a knock on the door I guess it's my onee-sama. I opened the door and well, my guess was right, she's with our new addition to the group, little Chaia.

"rei what happen?"

"I-I dunno. I was having some free time with myself when Youko-sama accidentally bumped into me and... she looked so down when I saw her and... I guess she came from Sei-sama's apartment."

"oh! Where is she?"

"in her room.."

"mind to look after Chaia for a while? I just need to see her." I just nod and she handled me the 4-year old kiddo.

"where is mom going aunt rei?"

"in Aunt Youko's room..."

"ohh... I want cho see aunt Youko too.." she said with some excitement of her face.

"maybe later kiddo.. we have to wait for your mom to go out first, okay?"

"but..."

"no buts.."

"hmp!" she then pouts and it's cute.

(Eriko)

I knocked on Youko's door but no one answered, so I just let myself in. I found her lying on her stomach and face turn to the side facing me her eyes were close so I thought she was sleeping, but then she opened her eyes and stare at me for a while then closed it again and faced the other direction. But one thing didn't escape from my sight, her eyes shows myriad of emotions but more so her face shows some sort of depression.

"what happened?" I said whilst sitting at the side of the bed.

"nothing."

"silly.. ms. Lillian without her confidence? Then nothing happened... c'mon Youko.."

"stop calling me that pet name..." she said with a harsh voice.

"now.. now.. come here will ya!" I said while pulling her closer to me, she then rest her head on my lap.

"d-do you know how stupid am I? Eriko? Really.. I'm so stupid because I thought things were really okay now.." she said with trembling voice.

"i-is it Sei?" she nod. And before I could say something the door opened.

"aunt Youko!"

"err.. sorry, she said she wants to see her and when I said no, she just jump and run towards Youko-sama's room." I just smile at rei with that... how weird that Youko and I are in the middle of a discussion and here's little intrusion.

"Aunt Youko? are you okay? You look sad..." the kid said whilst climbing the bed.

"I'm okay honey.."

"but.. you look like you're not.. uhm.. I'll just kiss your pain away.." and Chaia kissed Youko lightly on the cheeks and wrapping her little arms around Youko's slender form.

"now. Now Chaia honey, you did what you're supposed to do you could go out now..."

"but... but... I want to stay with aunt Youko!"

"c'mon kid, Aunt Rei will teach you to bake some cookies. right Rei?" I said

"R-REALLY?" she said with much excitement.

"yes, some come on now..." then little Chaia immediately run towards Rei.

"Youko-sama you don't mind us messing up your kitchen right?" Youko just shook her head. Then, the two went out with Rei closing the door.

"so, what happened really?" I asked whilst combing her hair using my hand.

"I guess I was expecting too much from her."

"what do you mean?"

"I- we were supposed to meet on her apartment, she said to me last night that she will be telling me something and... when I went there... I saw her kissing Shiori." Suddenly I saw tears falling from my fragile friend's cheeks... "I know I shouldn't act like this but..."

"wait! her kissing Shiori or the other way around?"

"but what's the difference!"

"you know if--"

"she was kissing her back!"

"but maybe.."

"she loves her Eriko. I know it. you know it. we know how much she love that woman how she almost die when she lose her!"

"you will give her up just like that?"

"I have nothing to fight Eriko."

"but... she loves you."

"does she?" I wanted to say 'yes' even proving it by saying Sei's decision but u think I'm not on the proper disposition to say it to her. It has to be Sei. but where is she in times like this? She should have explained it to her, or.. does she and Shiori.. no! I shouldn't think something like that. I shouldn't assume something even if I too saw Sei with Shiori.

"you know what Eriko... I'm getting tired already."

"tired of what?" I asked her. I wonder what is she talking about. This is the first time that I have heard her saying that she's tired.

"getting tired of waiting... for loving someone who just kept on breaking my heart.. I know I shouldn't be expecting something or feeling this way... but she made me feel that something that I could only make in the repress part of my brain... and I'm so stupid to fell for it. "

Then all of a sudden the door open up.

"Youko!"