Awaken

It was almost a week after he had squeezed her hand before Harry Potter finally awoke. He felt as if he was awakening from a long hibernation. It was quite an interesting experience to emerge into consciousness again. Almost as if someone was slowly pulling him out of a dark, sound-proof closet.

The first thing he became aware of was the sounds of muffled voices. He tried to understand what they were saying, but couldn't decipher it. The deeper sounding voice was saying something to a higher sounding voice. What could they be talking about? Must have been important though based on how they kept interrupting each other.

His mind then opened more and smelled the unmistakable smell of coffee and… what was that smell… roses? No wait… jasmine? Yes, it was jasmine. Something close to him smelled of jasmine. It was quite pleasant and… wait… what would smell like jasmine?

Then his mind registered that his hand was being held. Not just held, gripped tightly. But what gripped him was soft, warm and his mind liked the sensation. He didn't even mind the tight grip because of the softness of what was touching him.

Then his mind opened his eyes. Slowly at first. The brightness of the light was blinding to him and it hurt. He tried to focus his eyes, but everything was a bit blurry. Wait! He needed his glasses. Where were they? Suddenly a blurry form was in front of his vision. He squinted and tried to bring into focus the blurry face thought the bright light.

Finally, his mind turned on his voice, "Where… where am I?' he croaked.

"Harry!" came the voice from the blurry face. The voice sounded familiar to him and the person was a girl with brown hair.

All the sounds of voices suddenly got louder and spoke. He closed his eyes and tried to focus his mind even more. He felt something slip around his ears and he opened his eyes and found he could see clearly again. The brown haired girl had put his glasses on him and now was looking at him in relief and joy. His mind immediately identified her…

Hermione Granger

Harry's eyes widened for a brief moment in shock and panic. His mind suddenly decided to open completely and sat up quickly in a rush of panic.

"Harry, no," Hermione said imploringly, trying to hold him down by his shoulders, "You're in St. Mungo's. You're okay. Please try and relax."

Harry looked at saw a room full of Weasley's and he shook his head, "I need to go."

But another pair of hands, this time from Ron Weasley, joined Hermione's hands on him and helped hold him down, "No mate. You're not going anywhere."

Harry shook his head and was about to speak when Hermione took his face in her hands and turned him to look at her. He stopped struggling for a moment and looked into her face. He saw her sadness. His best friend was looking sad and… disappointed? He sat still while he took her face in.

"Harry, it is okay," she said softly, "There's no reason to leave again."

Then his mind remembered something that had happened to him after his duel with Hermione. The memory of what happened forced him to not run, even though his mind screamed for him to leave. So he willed himself to relax and stay where he was. This was not easy for him.

Hermione sensed and felt him relax in the bed. She slowly released him and gave a quick nod to Ron. Ron slowly nodded and let Harry go and stood next to the bed. Everyone patiently waited to see what Harry would do next.

Harry looked around at everyone. Molly, Luna, Ron, and Hermione's parents were gathered around his bed. Another person Harry didn't recognize stepped next to him and held out a wand at Harry.

"Welcome back, Mr. Potter," the tenor voice said with some relief in his voice as he scanned Harry, "I'm Healer Thurston. I need to ask you a few questions if that's okay?"

Harry just nodded blankly.

"Do you know your full name?"

"Har… Harry James Potter."

"Do you know who the Minister of Magic is?"

"Kingsley Shacklebolt, I think."

"Excellent. Do you know what today is?"

Harry thought for a second, then shook his head, "No. Sorry."

"That's okay," the voice said reassuringly, "Can you name everyone you recognize?"

Harry nodded and pointed to Ron first, "Ron, Luna, Mrs. Weasley, Mr. Granger, Mrs. Granger," he paused a moment when he looked again at Hermione, "'Mione."

She smiled at his use of her shortened name.

"Good," the healer said with more cheer, "What was the last thing you remember?"

Harry's mind tried to remember, "I was in a forest and," he looked at Hermione again and saw a tear roll down her cheek, "I was thanking you. Then I blacked out or something."

"Or something," the healer echoed. He took a deep breath, "Mr. Potter, you are recovering from surviving the killing curse for the third time in your life."

Harry's mind struggled with that, "Survived again?"

The healer nodded, "Yes. You've been in a coma-like state for over a week now."

Harry's mind was still trying to piece together what that meant. It was no wonder he felt off if he'd been out like that for a whole week. He ran his hands through his hair and noticed it had been cut short again. He quickly grabbed his chin and felt his smooth skin; his beard was gone.

"You're going to feel a little disoriented for a while, Mr. Potter," the healer said, putting his wand away and looking at the auto-quill writing on a floating pad of paper, "So please do not stress yourself out if you don't immediately recognize something or you cannot remember something. It's possible you will just need a few more moments before it clicks in. Also, you have plenty of people around you that would be willing to help fill in some of those gaps," the healer looked at Harry, "Any questions?"

"Can I leave now?"

The healer flashed Hermione a look before shaking his head, "No, I'm sorry but you have to stay here for a few days until you're recovered. I still would like to run a test or two more now that you're awake, but I can do that later."

Harry's shoulders slumped when he was told he couldn't leave. He tried to calm himself as he tried to remember what he'd been told.

Seeing that Harry was trying to come to grips with something, the healer decided that he should come back later, "I'll be back a bit later then," the healer said and quietly left the room.

"Welcome back Harry," Mrs. Weasley said in joyful relief, "We were afraid we might lose you."

Harry flashed a look at Hermione before replying, "Um… yeah… thanks," he replied not exactly in a pleasant tone.

An uncomfortable silence fell on the room. Mr. Granger made the first move when he lightly grabbed his wife at her elbow and gave her a gentle tug, "Why don't we get some food for you Harry. You must be famished."

He gave everyone a look and they understood, "Yeah, mate. The food's not too bad here," Ron said with a chuckle, "We'll be back soon."

He followed Luna and Mrs. Weasley out of the room. Harry watched them go and then it was only him and Hermione left. There was a long moment of silence between them. Neither knew how to start.

Hermione made the first move, "It's good you're back."

He saw her smile, but shrugged his shoulders, "It's not like I really had any choice," he said with no joy in his voice.

He saw hurt in her eyes at his comment and was remorseful for it, but he couldn't bring himself to apologize to her. He knew it wasn't her fault. She had done what he had begged her to do. But he was angry because he didn't want to be here and now that he was he wanted to be alone.

A flash of anger crossed her face, "You're a bloody arse, you know that?" she fumed at him, "After what you pleaded for me to do and I did it… you sit there and… and…," she sputtered trying to find the words.

"You didn't do a go enough job then, did you?" he interrupted, his voice dripping with resentment. He knew immediately it was the wrong thing to say.

SLAP!

Harry's head suddenly spun to his right and his face burst with stinging pain. He felt his glasses fly off his face and heard them land somewhere on the floor with a loud clatter. He slowly turned back to her and saw her face flushed with anger and turned to stone. Her hand was starting to turn red from the impact against his face, but she didn't even register the pain in her hand and wrist.

With barely contained rage and in a soft angry whisper, Hermione's eyes bore into him, "How dare you… how dare you say that to me!"

She leaned forward menacingly, "You begged me. You begged me to something I didn't want to do!"

He sat back in his bed, suddenly and genuinely afraid of her. His fear showing in his eyes.

She ignored his fear. Her anger negated any sympathy she felt for him, "But I did it didn't I?" she continued in the quiet fury filled voice, "I did it! Because I saw how much pain you were in Harry. I saw it! And it hurt me to see you in that much pain."

She looked at him in angry hurt, "Do you know what it's like to be asked to end the life of someone you love? Do you?!" she practically spat out.

He shook his head. The closest he came was when Dumbledore asked him to not interfere with Draco and Snape in the Astronomy Tower, but he'd never had some ask him to do what he had asked of her.

"No. You. Don't." she angrily hissed every word. She pointed at him, "You have no idea what it's like to have the one person you love more than anything in this world beg you to do that," her voice lowered and got softer and if possible even angrier, "And you have no idea what it's like to actually do it. So, don't you ever say something like that to me again after what I've done for you."

There was a moment of silence between them and Harry looked into Hermione's rage filled eyes.

Slowly she stood and grabbed her cloak, "I can't stand to look at you right now. Goodbye Harry and you're welcome."

With not so much of a sound she fled the room. Harry just laid back in his bed, frightened and panicked for what had happened and unsure what to do.

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Emma Granger was just about to sip her tea when a dark blue blur suddenly flew past where everyone was sitting. If it wasn't for the age-old ability of a mother to recognize their children, she would have never been able to register the blue blur was her daughter. She quickly put her cup down and raced off after her to the shocked and confused looks of everyone with her. It took Emma a few moments of running to even get close to her daughter.

"Hermione, what happened?!" Emma said after she had caught up with her daughter.

Hermione never slowed in her walk, "I'm leaving, Mum."

"Whoa, whoa, wait there young lady," her mother grabbed her and dragged her to a halt. Hermione's cape, which had been billowing out as she walked, wrapped itself around Hermione. Emma was surprised when she saw her daughter's flushed face.

"What happened?" she asked, knowing immediately that it must not have gone well.

Hermione's eyes flashed with anger again, "I don't want to talk about it."

Hermione made to leave, but Emma stepped in front of her, "Nope, not this time. You used to do this when you were little, but I'm not going to stand for it now. You need to talk to me."

She took Hermione's elbow and dragged her into an empty room.

She placed herself between Hermione and the door and looked at her daughter expectantly, "Okay, so tell me."

Hermione sighed and told her mother what happened. She ended her brief recount by throwing her hands up in disbelief, "And I hit him, Mum! I hit Harry!"

"Sounded like he deserved it," her mother replied with an even tone.

"Mum, I have never hit Harry before in my life," she said looking at her mother in surprise, "No matter what he's said or done, I've never raised my hand to him."

"Well this time is different," her mother said.

"Oh really? Do you encourage people to hit those you just woke from comas?"

Emma shook her head, "No, you misunderstand. Do you think he believes you tricked him?"

"Tricked him?" Hermione looked at her mother in disbelief, "Mum… he heard me speak the incantation. He knows the spell I used. There's no way to trick a person out of the killing spell."

Emma regarded her daughter thoughtfully, "If he knows what you did, then why is he bitter about being alive?"

"I don't know," Hermione resignedly whispered, "I didn't ask. I just know that it hurt me so much when he said that. I am so angry at him."

Emma stepped forward and embraced her daughter, "I'm sure it did," she released her and looked at Hermione, "And I'm not trying to minimize what he said or defend him. I think there just might be something else there."

Hermione nodded, "You're probably right. But I can't be with him right now after what happened. I just need some time away from him."

Emma nodded understanding. She gave a soft laugh, "You know, after 35 years of marriage your father still has that effect with me sometimes. That's why your aunt still has that spare room with the daybed."

The corners of Hermione's mouth quirked upwards and she nodded.

Emma rubbed her daughters arms comfortingly, "Now go on. Clear your head and your anger," she held a hand up to her daughter to interrupt the obvious question that was about to be asked, "And yes, I'll make sure he doesn't run away again," she lowered her voice and muttered, "After I have a few choice words with him too."

Hermione gave her mother a quick hug of thanks and left.

Emma sighed heavily and shook her head.

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It was over two weeks later before Hermione was even able to be in the same room with Harry. It had been a very trying time for Hermione. While she loved Harry more than anything, she was still getting over their argument and her feelings about what had happened. Every time she wanted to be with him, her anger flared up again at what he said and she didn't go. But she constantly asked how he was doing.

Her mother was true to her word and Harry had not run away in that time. She knew her mother had laid into Harry after she'd left. Her father had been sworn to secrecy about what had been said to Harry, but he did confirm that Emma had spoken her peace. Harry apparently was chastised enough to apologize to them and readily accept the counseling that was offered by St. Mungo's. He even promised both mothers, as Mrs. Weasley had been there too, that he wouldn't try and run away again. And Harry always kept his promises.

He had spent a few more days at St. Mungo's before going back to The Burrow. She knew he was asking about her as well, which she was very happy to know. Once he had been back at The Burrow for a week, she had shown up at a little welcome home party. She stayed in the background while the Weasley's and a few others welcomed him home. She saw he seemed more than a little uncomfortable with the attention, which was normal for Harry anyways, but Hermione saw that there was something even deeper behind his uncomfortableness.

It was then, during the party, that Hermione started to think that there was something to what her mother had mentioned when she was storming out of the hospital after their argument. While she was still angry with him, she was curious to know if her mother was right. He did see her that day and looked a bit fearful at her. She gave him a small smile and nod before disappearing into the kitchen to help Mrs. Weasley. He made no efforts to try and talk with her that day and she still avoided him.

But she was sad. It hurt her not to be with him. What should have been a happy occasion for her too, was bittersweet. She did cry when she got home later that night. She didn't want this to go on too much longer, but she knew she needed time too.

Finally, two weeks after the welcome home party, there came a knock at her door. She curiously looked at the door before getting up from her desk and opening it. She was surprised at the sight of Luna standing there.

"Luna?" Hermione said in surprise, "Come in!"

Luna smiled and entered and followed Hermione into the study.

"Can I get you tea or anything?" Hermione asked as she sat down on the couch.

Luna shook her head and joined her, "No thank you, Hermione. I cannot stay long. I'm running an errand for my father so he can finish this month's Quibbler."

Hermione looked a little disappointed, but nodded, "Anything exciting?'

"Not really. Just need to pick-up a delivery of some printing supplies in Diagon Alley," Luna shrugged her shoulders. She fished in her cloak and held out an envelope to Hermione, "I swung by The Burrow before I came and I was asked to give this to you while I was out."

Hermione took the envelope and immediately recognized Harry's handwriting on the outside, "Thank you."

Luna gave her friend a meaningful look, "I think it's time for you two to talk again."

Luna's patented bluntness was in full force today Hermione noted, and nodded at her friend, "Is he okay?"

Luna contemplated her answer for a moment and noticed Hermione had not opened the letter, "He's come a long way with the counselor. They talk every day and he seems to be getting better. He's started opening up to us now. I think it's because there are fewer Wrackspurts around him now. But…," she trailed off as she looked at Hermione, "He misses you."

Hermione dropped her head and nodded, but didn't say anything.

Luna stood, knowing that there was little more she could do on that topic, "I have to run now that I'm done my mail duties."

Hermione smiled in thanks, "Thank you for dropping this off."

"You're welcome," Luna said as she opened the door, "Oh, you are still willing to babysit for us Thursday?"

Hermione nodded, her smile brightening, "Of course!"

Luna nodded, "Excellent. See you later!"

Hermione closed the door after Luna apparated off her doorstep. She walked back into the study and sat by the fire in one of Sirius's favorite chairs. She held up the letter, taking in that he only wrote "'Mione" on the front. She was a little nervous to open it and noticed her hands were shaking a little. She took a deep breath, broke the seal, pulled the letter out and began to read.