Chapter Ten: All That You Can't Leave Behind
Devin's Point of View
Tonight was just destined to be a horrible evening of that I was sure. Da had taken ill and was confined to bed with Ma hovering over him. Liam and Ryan had yet another row, which in and of itself wasn't surprising, those boys spent more time fighting with one another than getting along. Whatever had happened this time, I had no idea. But two surly MacManus men at a bar never ended well. They sat at either end of the bar, the distance separately them a warning to all as to what had happened. Both were nursing a beer, doing there very best to avoid everyone's eye and making everyone miserable in the process. I had been used as a messenger between the two and my patience was fraying, quickly.
Brendan and Finn were in between Liam and Ryan doing there very best to make a tense situation better. Brendan, Finn, and my other cousin Kennedy acted like they actually liked being around one another. They reminded me of Connor, Murphy, and Allison. Although both sets of triplets could and did fight like cats and dogs, they spent most of their time getting along, fighting with other people and watching one another's backs. Sometimes it seemed as though Ryan and Liam resented their bond, and the fact that they shared so much, their birthday, their room, and mannerisms. At the same time Liam and Ryan were inseparable, working part time at our farm and Aunt Belle's. Confusion thy name was MacManus.
"'Ow ya doin today, Dev?" Rowan asked.
Her blonde hair was pulled back into a messy bun, a few stubborn pieces hung down, hiding her emerald eyes. She had grown taller than both Ally and I at five foot seven. She was one of the Anvil customer's favorite barmaid's with an easy and luminescent smile.
"Been better," I answered flatly with pointed looks at both Liam and Ryan both of whom had the decency to look sheepish. "Yerself?"
"Great, actually," Rowan smiled. "It's nice ta 'ave the entire family together. Even Uncle Noah's 'ere now."
"Do ya even remember 'im?" I wondered.
The question seemed a little harsh but it was true. Uncle Noah had been someone I heard in Da's stories by the time we all started remembering things. He had apparently left when the lot of us were two or three. Still, I knew who he was when I met him again last night. It was like he had always been there…except he hadn't.
"Dev," Finn censured, having heard my question from across the bar.
"I didn' mean anythin by it," I insisted, eyeing Rowan who looked like someone had kicked her puppy. She had always been a little more sheltered than the rest of us, since she was the youngest. The big green eyes didn't help matters. Jaysus, I was a bitch.
"Then wot did ya mean?" Brendan asked.
"Nothin'," I rolled my eyes. "Jaysus fuckin' Christ, did ya all need ta jump down me throat?"
"Lords fuckin' name, " The entire bar seemed to say.
That was the one reprimand that seemed to become the go to phrase of the MacManus clan and anyone who knew them, which included any and all Anvil customers.
"Mother Mary full o' grace," I sighed.
The night trudged on as slow as possible, until finally last call rang through. I was in the back straightening things; the rest of the family had gone home so I was the only one in the bar. Or at least I thought I was until I heard the bell of above the door ring.
"We're closed!" I called.
When I didn't hear anyone walk back out of the door, I dropped the dishtowel and stormed out of the back room. Could this day get any more irritating? Scowling as I slammed into the main room.
"I said we're closed," I growled.
"Oh, I 'eard ya," Someone behind me laughed, closing the door I just walked through. "I jus' didn' care."
"Fergal," I sneered. "Wot are ya doin?"
"I didn' ask ye ta speak, Devin," Fergal growled. "I've come ta collect, as par our arrangement."
"I told ye I don' need protection," I snarled.
"Why?" Fergal scoffed. "Ye bro'thers and cousins are gonna keep ya safe? Dat kept Allison safe, I 'eard. Oh, right, she was raped, wasn' she?'
"Fuck you," I snarled.
"Mind yer manners," Fergal scolded. "Ya don' 'ave yer guns and yer alone. I suggest ye give me tha money or I'll 'urt ya."
"And ye'd enjoy dat wouldn' ya?" I growled. "Ya sick fuck."
The only warning I had was Fergal's eyes hazel eyes darkening before he backhanded me across the face. Before I could fall he grabbed me by the shirt pulling me to him. The click of a safety echoed around the bar as a gun rested against my temple.
"Now tha was jus unprofessional," Fergal sighed. "I'm surprised at ye, Devin. Ta make matters worse ya made me mar dat pretty lil face o' yers. Now, where's me five hundred Euros?"
"Ye gonna shoot me?" I questioned.
"I'm not a patient man," Fergal growled. "Tha money or yer life and then I'll go ta dat pretty lil cousin o' yers."
"Ya touch 'er and I'll kill ya meself," I snarled.
"Cute," Fergal scoffed shoving me in the direction of the register. "Now."
I opened the register hiding a smile as I pulled out the small pistol Da had the foresight to put there. I pulled out five hundred Euros, pulling the pistol into sleeve.
"Here," I snarled.
"There's a good lass," Fergal praised.
He turned on his heel to go to the door and that's when I moved, grabbing the pistol and cocking the safety. Before Fergal could turn or reach, I fired shooting him through the shoulder.
"Ye bitch," Fergal gasped.
"Don' call me dat," I growled, walking over to him I flipped the lock on the door, pulling the Euros from his hand and pocketing it. "I've been wantin ta do this since ye bitch slapped me cousin."
Fergal's eyes were livid as I stepped on his chest pinning him to the floor.
"A shepherd I shall be," I began. "Fer thee me Lord fer thee, power hath descended forth from thy hand dat me feet shall swiftly carry out thy command. I shall flow a river forth ta thee and teemin with souls shall it ever be. In nomine Patris, et Filii, et Spiritus Sancti."
I crossed myself before I fired a bullet into Fergal's skull. Blood splattered everywhere as I stumbled backwards. I had done it. I'd actually killed a man. I had heard whispers of a calling from God to be his vengeful hammer but he had never called me. He had called me Da and me Uncles, and even Connor, Murphy, and Ally, if the rumors were true. But, he hadn't called the rest of us. Or maybe he didn't in so many words.
A sob forced its way from the back of my throat as I grabbed the phone from the wall, knowing no matter the number I dialed, I would have support in my decisions. I knew it was late to be calling but family had the uncanny knack for knowing when other family was on the line.
"Dev?" Ally questioned. "Wot's goin on?"
"I 'ad an unfortunate run-in wit' yer ex," I quipped.
With the overprotective men in our family Ally, Ro, and I had only had a handful of boyfriends each. Knowing Ally as well as I did, I knew she'd know what ex I meant.
"Are ye alright?" Ally growled. The rage in her tone was barely masked and not directed as me as I heard a flurry of movement.
"Aye," I answered. "But I think ye should get over 'ere."
"I'll be there in five," Ally promised.
I hung up after I heard the slam of the other receiver. I moved back to the register, putting the money and gun back where they belonged. I then moved into the back, washing my hands and anything else that had been splattered with bleach. The door's locks tumbled open as Ally pushed her way in. She eyed Fergal's body before turning to shut the door, locking it back up.
"Wot tha 'ell happened?" Ally demanded.
"Fergal tried ta shake me down," I shrugged. "'E hit me. I gave 'im the money, and then I shot 'im. Took 'im out righ' though. A lot more than 'e deserved."
"I'll agree ta dat," Ally smirked. "Call Uncle Patrick. 'E'll write it up as self-defense. 'E hit ya ferst, right?"
"Aye," I nodded.
"Dat eye's gonna black up real nice," Ally told me.
"Déjà vu?"
"Ye're such a smart-arse," Ally shook her head. "I'll call Uncle Pat."
Twenty minutes later Garda Síochána, Ireland's own police officerswere swarming the place. Uncle Pat was Assistant Commissioner of Monaghan's Garda station. Some like my Uncle chose to carry guns while most carried batons.
"Why don' ye two go 'ome," Uncle Pat suggested. "It was self-defense, as ya said, right, Dev?"
"Aye," I nodded.
"Alrigh' then," Uncle Pat nodded "We'll get this place cleaned up. All things considered, ye might wanna close fer today."
"I think I can do dat," I replied. "Fergal might 'ave been a dick. But, I'll shut down the bar ta pay respect."
"Hold on a second, Dev," Uncle Pat called as Ally and I walked out the front door.
"Wot is it?" I asked.
"Why didn't ye tell anyone dat tha IRA was tryin to shake ye down fer money?" Uncle Pat questioned.
"Threatened ta kill me," I shrugged. "And everyone else."
Uncle Pat's face indicated that if Fergal hadn't already been dead, then he would've been the second that Pat found 'im. He gave both Ally and I a kiss on the forehead before he walked back inside the bar.
Ally's Point of View
By the time I got back from the bar, the entire house was dark. I unlocked the front door, slipping inside before I turned the lock once more. I snuck through the darkness, up the stairs and into my room. I collapsed into my bed sending a quick prayer for dreamless sleep.
When I awoke not even four hours later, breathing quick tears in my eyes, I knew that my prayers weren't answered. Frowning, I thanked God for the fact that at least I didn't remember it. Still it probably hadn't changed from the nightmares that I had recently. It always started with the rape, before going into Rocco's murder before Lorenzo killed either Murphy or Connor or on horrible days both.
The next morning came far sooner than I realized. After the nightmare I couldn't go back to sleep, so instead of wasting my time tossing and turning, and most likely waking up Conn and Murph in the process; I left our room. I went down to the fields, carefully avoiding any an all creaky spots in our floor Loki and Hunter, our border collies, circled around my feet barking every so often. Their eyes were attentive ready for anything and everything.
I often wondered if I was the only one who had nightmares. Of course, I didn't really think that I was a special case; just that my brothers were better at hiding it than I was. Frowning at nothing I dropped to a seat on the top of a hill on our land. I ended up watching the sun rise with the dogs on either side of me. When the sun was higher in the sky, I rose to my feet, whistling the special whistle that meant that the Hunter and Loki should go back to the barn.
I made my way back into the house, finding Ma and Da in the kitchen. Ma was cooking breakfast, while Da was reading the paper, cigar in his mouth, and a cup of tea in his free hand. The scene was surprisingly considering what we had been doing the last couple months. I could smell sausage and rashers (bacon) sizzling as Ma fussed with eggs, toast, fried tomatoes, hash browns, and because we couldn't possibly have enough food already, white and black pudding.
"Feedin an army, Ma?" I queried.
"Mornin lass," Ma smirked.
"Mornin Ma," I chirped, in a surprisingly good mood. "Mornin Da."
"Mornin Darlin'," Da smiled.
I sat down at my normal seat and watched Ma as she cooked. I could hear Conn and Murph stirring upstairs as the smell of a good home-cooked meal filtered to all areas of the house. When both made their appearances, their hair was standing on end and they were wearing the clothing they had fallen asleep in.
"Murph, say grace," Ma ordered as she laid out plates piled high with food. She was a firm believer in breakfast was a good start to any day.
We all bowed our heads as Murphy began to pray, "Lord we ask ye ta bless this food we're about ta receive. Bless tha hands dat prepared it Use it ta nourish and strengthen our bodies, and our bodies fer yer kingdom work. In Jaysus name we pray. Amen."
"Amen," We all agreed.
We dug into the food relishing the home cooked meal. I didn't forget that Devin had just killed Fergal and we would be gathering intel so that we could hit the IRA. Now that the IRA had targeted family our hands were tied, that was something that we couldn't let them get away with. The IRA was a terrorist group whose primarily goal was to get British influence out of Ireland, or at least that's how they started. Now they were skilled at explosions and inciting terror. They also financially backed the Irish mobs in the state, giving us the unique opportunity to deal critical blows to two separate criminal enterprises.
After breakfast I volunteered to clean up, giving myself some time before Conn, Murph, and I discussed business. Try as I might to remind myself that dreams were just dreams, the fact remained that when I saw Connor or Murphy I could also see them with their throats slit near to the bone. Fiction and reality collided and I had only my subconscious to blame. I was almost done with the dishes when I felt another presence in the room.
"Ye ha another nightmare," Connor sighed.
"Aye," I muttered, continuing to wash dishes.
Connor ducked into my peripheral vision prompting me to duck my head. Try as I might I could still see Connor, superimposed on the dream Connor whose lifeless body died at the hands of my own weapon. Lorenzo's voice mocking, "It's only fair."
"Wot did ya dream about?" Connor questioned.
"It's nothin," I mumbled.
"Liar," Connor scoffed. "Whatever it was it shook ye up. We 'eard ya cryin out fer us."
"Conn, please," I pleaded weakly, for what I didn't know.
"Ally," Connor whispered seconds before he spun me around taking my face in his hands, forcing our eyes to lock. I couldn't stop my eyes from moving from Connor's gaze to his throat. There was so much blood, no one could've survived a wound that deep.
"'E killed ya," I explained. There was raw emotion in my tone that I couldn't hide even if I wanted to. "Wit me own knife."
"'E ain't gonna touch me," Connor soothed "Or any o' us. We'll kill 'im, Ally. I promise ye that."
I didn't say a word as Connor opened his arms, needing no further invitation I burrowed myself into his chest, my face hidden in the hallow between his neck and shoulders. I really shouldn't have been surprised that my face was wet with tears, as Connor held me tightly. I was far to exhausted to be irritated that the one thing I seemed to be doing more than anything else was crying. I was such a girl.
"Shhh, Ally, shhh," Connor soothed. "Ye're alright, Murph and I are alright and so is everyone else."
Having two brothers really did come in handy more often than not. Two people who knew me so well to know whether I needed a shoulder to cry on or for good advice, Connor's expertise, or to scrap, which was Murph's area. Not to say that Connor hadn't trounced me enough times and Murphy was always there when I woke up from nightmares.
"Feel better?" Connor asked as I pulled away. He kept contact dropping a hand on my shoulder.
"Aye, a bit," I replied. "Thank ye, Connor."
"I 'ave information," Murphy announced walking into the kitchen.
"Do ya now, Macho Murph?" Connor smirked.
Murphy ignored the dig eyeing Connor and I curiously. A sudden spark lit up in his eyes as both he and Connor quickly conversed. For as many as the two of them ganged up on me but they also knew when talking one on one would be better. Either way we'd all be on the same page regardless of what method was used. Ma had always said that the whole united front thing that Connor and Murphy did was a skill that they had perfected by first using it with me. Like that St. Patty's day brawl, neither had to say a word to know when to attack.
"Wot did ya find out, Murph?" I questioned.
After holding my eyes he answered, "Guess wot town 'as an IRA stronghold? We do. They're shippin out guns ta tha States in oil dromes."
"Holy shite," Connor hissed. "As if we needed any more reason ta crush these sons o' bitches."
"'Ow's Dev holdin' up?" Murphy asked.
"She's fine," I smirked. "Told me 'e had it comin."
"Can' argue wit' dat," Connor grinned. "When's tha next shipment?"
"Three nights from now," Murphy responded.
"Plenty o' time," I stated. "We should tell Smecker."
At Connor and Murphy's confused look I continued, "We promised 'im we would lay low."
"We promised Roc we'd keep goin," Murphy retorted.
"Tha fuck is yer problem, Murphy?" I growled.
"Me problem?" Murphy sneered. "I don' 'ave a problem. Do ye?"
"Aye, I do," I retorted. "Perhaps it 'as somethin' ta do wit' me bro'ther bein a twat."
"A twat?" Murphy repeated, testily.
"We 'ave ta watch our backs, called or not we pull a hit 'ere and Interpol will be all over it," I stated.
"Interpol?" Connor repeated skeptically, shoving Murphy away from me with a sharp look to both of us. "Why tha 'ell would Interpol be involved."
"Organized Crime works all over tha world, Connor," I explained. "We kill organized crime members. We're in tha same category. It doesn't matter whether or not we're killin them all."
"Then wot do ye suggest?" Murphy questioned, still irritated with me for calling him a twat.
"I suggest we either call Smecker and give 'im a heads up," I stated. "Or we can leave the pennies at 'ome."
"And do wot?" Connor asked. "'Ow else do we show absolution?"
"Palm crosses," I suggested.
Connor and Murphy share a look before they nodded simultaneously. There were palms all over the place, Easter having taken place only a week before. It offered a way for the repentance, which wad ultimately the same thing for that we used the pennies for.
"We'll study up on everything and we'll be ready fer 'em," Murphy smirked.
When we were all in agreement we scattered to all areas of the house. I had gone back upstairs and noticed immediately that the chest of guns and money was sitting in the middle of the room. Someone had dug it up and not a moment too soon. I pulled out our guns laying them on my desk before kicking the chest closed once more. By the time we were through the IRA wouldn't even know what hit 'em.
"Please! Don' hurt 'em. I'm beggin ye." I sobbed as I thrashed against the handcuffs that were severely restraining my movements.
"I'm not hurting them," Lorenzo sneered. "Any one you touch will die. You killed my brother in public. The least I could do was get the men who terrorized that court and make them pay."
"He was a bad man!"
"He was my brother!" Lorenzo barked, closing the distance between us to punch me across the face. My head snapped to the side as Lorenzo glared own at me.
"Don' ye fuckin touch 'er!" Connor roared.
"You took my big brother away from me," Lorenzo growled. "You didn't even hesitate. There's a reason why that was a mistake."
"I'll fuckin' kill ya!" I screamed as Lorenzo turned moving towards Murphy. "I swear ta God!"
"Oh, you might," Lorenzo smirked yanking Murphy's head back and slitting his throat. "But not before I killed him."
I watched Murphy's eyes snap open, he had been unconscious moments before and was now awake and consciously aware that he was gagging…choking on his own blood.
"Murph!" Connor shouted. "Ye son o' a bitch!"
"Name-calling," Lorenzo scoffed. "Nice. Didn't your mother teach you any respect."
"Go fuck yerself," Connor snarled.
I screamed as Lorenzo lunged stabbing Connor in the stomach, dragging the knife upwards. Connor spluttered and gasped as he met Lorenzo's eyes. Hated gaze locked on hated gaze. I was still screaming when Lorenzo rounded on me, blood slicked knife dangling loosely from his hand. My brother's blood covering his formerly white shirt.
"This is all your fault," Lorenzo growled. "Everything. All of this is your fault. All this blood is on your hands."
"How could you let them do this to me?" Rocco whispered.
His chair was magically upright. The wound on his chest bleeding profusely, blood trickling out of his mouth, "I trusted you and you got me killed."
"Roc, no," I pleaded. "No, Rocco, no. Murphy, Connor, no, oh god, please! Go! No!"
"Allison!" Connor shouted. "Ally, come on, now."
"Open yer fucking eyes, Ally," Murphy ordered sharply. "Ye're scaring us. Listen ta me now, open yer eyes."
I rocketed out of bed, nearly colliding head first with Connor as I scrambled off my bed and into the corner between my bed and the wall. My knees were pulled up to my chest, my entire body shaking as I began to sob. I didn't know what to do, the nightmares were only getting worse. Sleep or no sleep it didn't matter, I knew what was waiting for me the second my eyes shut. The images waiting to assault me the second my guard was down.
"Oh, Ally" Connor sighed.
Suddenly the space between my bed and the wall was impossibly crowded as both he and Murphy leapt over the bed sitting down on either side of me. Their arms wrapped around me, cocooning me in the safety of their arms. I turned my body so that my face hidden in Murphy's neck as he maneuvered me into his lap so he could hold me more comfortably. Connor moved closer, his arms wrapped around both Murphy and I.
I knew that my nightmares weren't only wearing on me but on my brothers'. Who were forced to listen to my cries day after day and not be able to save me from the demons that lay in wait until I was asleep. But, they were there whenever I finally woke up, and that was enough for me.
Devin's Point of View
"Our father who art in heaven, hallowed by thy name. Thy kingdom come, thy will be done, on earth as it is in heaven. Give us today our daily bread. Fergive us our sins as we fergive those who trespass against us. And lead us not inta temptation but deliver us from evil. Fer thine is tha kingdom, and tha power, and tha glory, ferever and ever. Amen."
"Devin, lass yeh've been prayin in 'ere fer three hours now," Da whispered.
"Da, ye should be in bed," I reproached jumping up from my knees.
"Don' ye go and sound like yer Ma now," Da sighed.
He was wearing normal clothing, looking at me in concern. At least he looked healthier than he had all week. I sighed as I noticed that Uncle Patrick was beside Da and so was Uncle Noah.
"'Ow are ye, lass?" Uncle Noah asked.
"'M fine," I replied.
"Don'tcha lie inside these hallowed walls, lassie," Uncle Patrick scolded. "Tha ferst kill is always the hardest."
"I wasn' called," I mumbled.
"Nonsense child," Noah reproached. "Ye know ye did tha right thing. There are different ways ta be called."
"Wot about Conn, Murph, and Ally?" I asked. "They were called. Ally told me about tha shared dream and everythin."
"Don' worry 'bout it, Devin," Patrick sighed. "'E would've killed ye."
"I killed 'im," I whimpered, my voice suddenly quavering. "I shot 'im square in tha chest and I don' regret a thing. I said the prayer and I pulled tha trigger and I'd do it all over again."
"The MacManus family 'as always been cut from a different cloth, Dev," Da explained. "While other people are content ta wait fer God ta pass 'is judgment or let the law take care of the evil-doers, the MacManus' know dat sometimes people need ta be shown tha error of their ways by takin away tha one thing dat matters most. We're the vengeful striking hammer o' God. We've always been called. Last night was yer turn. Maybe it'll just be you, Connor, Murphy, and Allison. Or maybe tha others will one day join ye four. Either way ye were given a task, child. Don' let yer guilt guide ye away from it."
"Yer bro'thers and cousins will always watch yer back, Dev," Noah smiled. "If ye ever need them, ye know they'll be there fer ye."
"Aye," I smiled.
"Now, wot do ye say about comin 'ome and getting somethin' ta eat?" Da smiled. "Yer Ma's worried sick."
"And ye know how yer Ma gets," Patrick smirked. "Makes Belle look like tha calmest one o' tha family."
"Now dat's funny," Noah smirked. "She kept up wit' those three. Ye gotta give 'er dat."
"Oh, Noah, we 'aven't even begun ta touch wot yet three little scamps got inta growin up," Patrick shook his head. "We gave ye some of the best stories but those three got inta more trouble then any set o' MacManus kids has ever gotten inta."
"There was tha time they nicked tha sacramental wine," Da snickered. "Don' think they sat right fer weeks after Belle was through wit 'em fer dat one."
"They were polluted, Sibeal," Patrick wheezed. "There was tha time at Conn and Murph accidently set tha barn on fire."
"Dat was tha ferst time they smoked!" Da smiled. "I startled 'em and tha eejiits dropped tha cigarettes in tha hay and scrambled out ta meet me. Like I couldn' smell tha smoke on 'em."
"Wot about tha time dat Connor and Murph threatened Ally's ferst boyfriend?" Patrick snickered. "Poor lad ran fer tha hills."
"Oh, Ally was fumin'," Da whistled. "She looks jus' like Belle when she gets angry."
"She didn' talk ta Conn or Murph fer days, tha two o' 'em didn' know wot ta do," Patrick sighed. "They never could handle knowin Ally was ticked wit' 'em."
"There was tha time where Connor broke tha coffee table," Da shook his head. "Do ya even remember wot 'e and Ally were fuckin' arguing about?"
"Nay," Patrick sighed. "Murphy gave tha lot o' us a fright, sayin 'ow Ally lunged at Connor, who managed to spin 'er around, slammin 'er on tha coffee table and breakin it in the process."
"Six stitches outta dat scrap," Da grimaced. "Belle, was hoppin mad. Who could blame 'er? She comes 'ome ta find Ally unconscious, Connor wit' a bloody nose and blacked eye, wit' Murph getting all worked up over it."
"Murphy trounced Connor good fer dat one," Patrick said. "Scrappin over a scrappin. Could only made sense ta those three."
"Wot was dat one story ya told me?" Noah asked. "Tha three of 'em stole yer car?"
"Dat wasn' their idea, actually," Da smiled. "Liam and Ryan suggested it and yer three thought it sounded like a good fuckin' idea."
"Spent a night in jail over dat mess," Patrick muttered.
"Ally was tha trouble-maker though," Da smirked. "She knew 'ow ta deflect tha blame. Lord only knows 'ow much she got away wit'. A wee devil in angel's skin, dat's wot she is. Little heathens, tha lot o' 'em."
"Kept ye two on yer toes," Noah smirked. "Ma always said dat we three would get a taste o' our medicine."
"Foul women, cursed us, she did," Da snickered. "I see dat innocent look ye're makin, Devin. Don' even try it. Ye and yer bro'thers got inta yer own trouble."
I smirked at that because Da was right Liam, Ryan, and I could get into nearly as much trouble as Conn, Murph, and Ally did. Although, the latter three enjoyed causing mischief. Aunt Belle always said that they could get into trouble as easy as we all breathed. All of us could. We had turned this town on it's head more than enough times whenever the lot of us ganged together. Whether it was the boy beating up so unfortunate lad for looking at us in a disrespectful matter, or riling up our teachers. I don't know who was more relieved when we all graduated the teachers or our parents.
Ally's Point of View
"You always have to be stubborn, don't you?"
My head whipped around as I took in my surroundings. The room I was in was like a hybrid of the three bars that had turned into my home away from home. Instead of the usual suspects behind the bar, however, was Rocco. For the first time in a very long while, he wasn't bleeding. He actually looked healthier. His eyes were bright, his hair was slightly shorter and he was smiling at me affectionately.
"Wot are ye talkin' about, Roc?" I asked.
"I've been there, you know," Rocco informed me. "No wonder you don't want to sleep. Have your nightmares always been this horrible?"
"Yes," I shook my head. "For as long as I could remember, anyway."
"You know I don't blame you for what happened," Rocco told me firmly. "I'm a big boy. I made my decision and despite what you and your brothers' think I knew what I was getting into. You guys made it so my life could mean something."
"But, ye're dead," I whispered.
"Allison, listen to me," Rocco ordered. "I rather be dead then still be alive and be the Yakavetta's package boy. I made a stand. I died so that you three could continue what you need to do. You're works not finished, Ally, not by a long shot."
"I know," I frowned.
"Lay low for another week or two," Rocco suggested. "Then get back to work. Fuck what that fed think. You guys are smart enough to know how to cover your tracks."
"I miss you, Rocco," I whispered. "You look good."
"I miss you too, Allison," Rocco smiled. "I'll see you around here. Or at least I'll try to get to you before those Lorenzo nightmares do."
Rocco came around the bar and wrapped his arms around me, pulling me from my seat as I wrapped my arms around his waist, listening to his heart beating. And it was beating, but in a way that said that it was beating because I wanted it to be, not because he was alive. Still I felt comforted in a way that I haven't experienced from anyone else other than family and Van. It was nice.
"Watch out for them, okay?" Rocco pleaded.
"Always have."
For the first time in months, I actually woke up after my brothers, and slept through all the alarms that we had set up. When I had showered and changed into clean clothing I made my way into the kitchen to find Ma, Da, Conn, and Murph, sitting around the kitchen table just chatting.
"…And then do ye know wot they did?" Ma asked Da. "They looked at me like they were wee angels, wit' scrapes and bloody noses with tha broken coffee table and lamp all 'round 'em. Me poor livin room was destroyed. Fer some reason dat was where they always fought. The living room, or their room. Sometimes in the fields outside, which always sent the dogs into a damn frenzy."
"Well, look who finally decided ta wake up," Ma grinned, her voice carrying easily into the living room as I walked into the kitchen, leaning against the wall.
"No more nightmares?" Murphy asked.
"Only tha one," I grinned.
"'Bout time," Ma smiled. "Ya hungry, dear?"
"No, I'm alright, Ma," I replied slipping into my seat.
"I've heard a lot o' stories o' ye three," Da shook his head.
"Dat sounds forebodin," I snickered.
"Apparently Uncle Pat and Uncle Sibeal told 'im all their favorite stories," Connor explained.
"Then Ma started in," Murphy shook his head. "Makes us sound like we did nothin but cause trouble."
"Well, we had ta plan some o' our pranks," I responded. "It ain't as easy as it looks."
"Ain' dat tha truth," Da laughed.
"Now, don' ye go encouraging 'em, Noah," Ma reproached smacking Da's arm. "I told ye dat they seem ta 'ave studied wot ye and yer bro'thers did and then wrote their own."
"It's a horrible thing when the students surpass tha master," Da laughed.
Ma scowled as the lot of us burst into laughter. She started mumbling something about suddenly having four children instead of three. As she wandered over to check the oven, where lunch was cooking, she began ranting about how her tits were dangling by her ankles and it was all our fault.
I smiled as I leaned back into my chair. While I doubted that other families had the issues or the day job the MacManus family had, we were at the heart of everything a normal family. Bickering siblings, loving parents, and enough scrappin to make things interesting. I watched as Connor and Murphy bickered over something or another as Da lit a cigar.
Maybe it was the fact that I had a good dream, the first good dream in the longest time, but for now everything seemed peaceful. Of course, nothing stayed peaceful for long. When the phone began to ring, I thought nothing of it, as I got up from my seat and picked up the receiver.
"'Ello," I greeted.
"Ally," Devin squeaked. Her voice sounded off somehow. Thick and staggered like she was trying to hold back tears.
"Dev?" I whispered. "Wot is it?"
"It's Ro," Devin whimpered. "Oh, god, Ally, Ry found 'er in the alley behind tha Anvil."
"Found 'er?" I repeated. "I thought tha Anvil was closed today."
"She was doin inventory or somethin'," Devin sighed. "Someone damn near killed 'er."
"Killed 'er?" I gasped. "Devin, wot tha fuck happened?"
"Allison, wot's goin on?" Da demanded as I noticed the others had gathered around me. Each with varying degrees of worry and concern.
"She's in tha fuckin' hospital," Devin explained. "She hasn't woken up yet."
"Jaysus," I grimaced.
"Jus' get 'ere," Devin ordered. "Aunt Nora's and me Ma are losin their minds. Bren, Finn, Kenny, Li, and Ry, are out fer blood. This is all me fault."
"None o' this is yer fuckin' fault, Devin," I retorted sharply. "IRA?"
"O' course," Devin growled. "Fuckin' assholes are gonna pay fer this."
"Wot tha fuck is goin on?" Connor demanded.
I smacked Murphy upside the head as he grabbed the phone from my hands. After a quick word, the color in Murphy's face drained as he passed the phone to Ma. I watched Ma's face carefully as she listened to what Devin had to say. It was only until Ma hung up the telephone did her normally hard veneer crack. Tears filled her eyes as she turned to look at Da.
"Me Belle, wot is it?" Da whispered.
"Rowan's in tha hospital," Ma said. "Dev found 'er a hour ago."
"Murph, Ally, can I speak wit ye two fer a moment?" Connor asked.
"Ye three meet us at tha hospital," Da ordered. "Come on, Belle."
We watched as Ma and Da quickly pulled on their coats before quickly leaving, shutting the front door behind them. The second the door closed Connor, Murphy and I turned to look at one another.
"Ye two mind tellin me wot tha fuck is goin on?" Connor growled. "Why is Ro in tha hospital?"
"IRA was settlin a score," I sighed. "Dev thinks it's 'er fault. Dat they were waitin fer 'er and got Ro instead."
"Jaysus Christ," Connor hissed. "We're gonna kill 'em all."
I shuddered at the steely determination in Connor and Murphy's gazes, knowing that my eyes were no doubt mirroring the fiery intensity. It was bad enough that they had been shaking down Devin for money. But to target the youngest MacManus and beat her severely enough to land her in the hospital was a step to far. The very reason why we hadn't begun to deliver people because we were worried about our families being targets. That plan had backfired, leaving me to wonder if we had been doing what we were called to do the entire time we were home if this situation would've ever arose.
"Two days," Connor snarled. "Then tha lot o' 'em are gonna ta die."
Author's Note: Longest chapter yet, huzzah! Wanna make it the most reviewed chapter yet? *nudge, nudge* Just kidding, well, not really. But review or not, it's okay. I really liked this chapter with all the random memories. I hope you all felt the same way.
Love,
Beccatdemon13