Chapter 9

Alaya couldn't get to sleep at all. She left her small bedroom and walked out into the forest to sit in the moonlight. Mira had given her a lot to think about but, she had also made her feel good. She'd never felt welcomed this way, though to be fair, she'd never tried to be. The Loke thing, was a mess. Trusting people wasn't something that came naturally to her anymore, and pursuing something with someone who had such a history felt like it was set up to fail, however maybe it was something she could enjoy.

"Have you been thinking about what I said?" Having been lost in thought, she hadn't noticed she hadn't been alone. She jumped and immediately went on the offensive. It was instinct. Her hands glowed with energy ready to fire. "It's just me," Loke said simply. He was dressed back in his suit and red tie just as usual.

"Oh, you scared me." Alaya relaxed, neutralizing her energy. She sat back down and Loke joined her.

"I'm sorry. I thought you knew I was here. You always seemed to know before."

"I was… thinking." She turned to meet Loke's gaze. "Yes, I have been thinking about what you said. Pretty extensively actually."

Loke shifted closer so their arms brushed. "And?"

"And I've had a lot to think about. Mira gave me some advice though."

Loke's eyes opened in shock. "You told her?"

"No, she saw. We weren't exactly sneaky."

"No, I'm sorry about that. I could have been more tactful but…" His eyes glinted in the moonlight. "I couldn't help myself." Alaya blushed at his flirting. She played with the white ends of her hair to distract herself. "What did Mira say?"

"To give you the abridged version, she said I was part of the guild family and no matter what I thought about myself, they wanted me there. She also vouched for you."

"You aren't a monster Alaya. You're powerful yes. You have unusual gifts. And not aging, the ability to go into the spirit world… that is a little inhuman, but that doesn't make you a monster."

"If I lost control, I could kill so many people."

"But you wont." She flinched at that. But she had. Given, it hadn't been an accident, but still.

Alaya faced him, to see a completely serious look on his face. "How do you know? Power corrupts people. The one who did this to me..." She closed her eyes. "I watched so many people die there. He killed families to abduct children, he killed my family. Some of the experiments were so strong they would die right there on the table. Others died during training."

"None of that was your fault."

"No, that wasn't, but I couldn't save them either."

Loke put his hand on her shoulder. "But you put an end to that facility."

"Yes. One day, I realized just how much power I had and they didn't have the means to contain me anymore. They used to use my weaknesses to beat me into submission but when I was left alone, I realized there was nothing they could do."

Alaya would see right here what Loke truly thought. It would be painful, but she could tell him the whole story. "Do you want to hear?" She'd never told anyone the full story before. Makarov had of course talked with her when she joined Fairy Tail, but he didn't ask for any information outside of her comfort zone. Back then everything was still so fresh in her mind that speaking about it always made her start to sink into a panic.

"Yes."

"One night, after they put me back in my cell I started to plan what I had to do. I memorized the facility, every room I had been in, where the information was kept, everything. I waited until a change in the guards and I started to drain the power. The whole place started flicker but I was gone by the time they got to my cell. I teleported all of the surviving prisoners out, there weren't many, before going back in and I blew the place. I destroyed everything so no one would ever know the identities of those who had been tested on, or how it had been done." And she had killed everyone who had worked there. By the time she had gone back to the facility, a rage had taken over her. She didn't care to look into the employees backgrounds before either killing them herself, or letting them die in the explosion.

"How?"

Alaya put her hand on Loke's neck and showed him. She had gone to the center of the building and simply went super nova. She pushed out the energy in a wave and it had done devastating damage to the building and even the forest surrounding it.

Loke could feel the power of the blast and the rage Alaya had felt when the facility was destroyed. He had no idea she had this much power within her. From just that alone nothing but rubble was left. He had seen Natsu and even Gildarts destroy buildings, even causing thousands of jewels worth of damage to entire towns, but nothing like this. The blast simply leveled everything. Quite a bit of it had been vaporized by the power, whatever was left still there crumbled to almost nothing. When his vision returned he stared at her. Looking at the small girl in front of him, it was hard to picture that she was able to do that.

"They made me into this," she said bitterly.

"You did it to protect those people and anyone else they may have captured."

"Yes, but I killed all of the people left in that building. There weren't even bodies left." Alaya cringed at the admission.

"They deserved it," Loke argued.

"Perhaps some of them did, but I doubt they all did. And besides that, what happens if I slip and lose control? What happens if I take control over someone's energy and kill them because I wasn't careful enough. I'm not a saint that decided to live out her days peacefully in the mountains. I study all kinds of magic so I wouldn't have weaknesses people could use to hurt me again. If I knew all kinds of magic, no one would hurt me, and I could hunt down the one responsible for everything."

"They weren't in the building?"

"No, he wasn't. One day, I'll find him." Loke could see the fury behind her eyes, and he didn't blame her. This man had caused so much pain, and not just to Alaya. Not only that but as Alaya saw it, this man had taken away her humanity.

"I'll help you find him," Loke said. A man like this needed to be stopped anyway. Who knows what he had been up to after Alaya had destroyed the facility. He could still be hurting others. In fact, Loke doubted that destroying a facility would have put a stop to a man's pursuit of experimenting. He was really surprised that he hadn't gone in search of Alaya since she was a powerful result of his testing.

Alaya turned on him in surprise. "I think this man needs to be stopped and it's important to you. I still don't think any of this makes you a monster. You did what you needed to to protect yourself and those around you. You studied to make yourself stronger. It's what everyone would do, you are just very capable."

"You know this is how Zeref fell. Having so much power. People still think of him as a horrible dark wizard because of his magic."

"That doesn't mean you will." Loke was confident. She was too good. Ever since she got here she has gone out of her way to help her friends. She cared for other people and wanted to make things right. He admired her. Not only that, but she was always so collected and in control. The only times he had seen her control slip had nothing to do with magic and more to do with his teasing.

Alaya didn't seem as convinced as he did, but she didn't argue. "Mira was right though. Everyone here loves you."

"That was something I didn't expect." Alaya stared at the grass. "I have visited the guild since joining but it was always brief and mostly to check in so Makarov knew I was still alive. It was usually when I was out traveling to my studies. I only really talked to others when I would meet other wizards to improve my magic or learn new magic. But aside from passing hellos, I didn't really make friends at the guild. Of course, I wasn't ever there long enough to give anyone a chance. I've had very few friends over the years."

"Who have they been?" Loke was curious about her life, he wanted to know everything about her, from her dark secrets to who she deemed a friend.

Alaya thought. "I suppose Makarov has always been a friend, though most of our conversations have been through letters, and Mystogan. I sort of befriended Hibiki as well, though we were not close friends. I hear from him every now and again."

Loke withheld a glare. He supposed she didn't know he had heard her talking about kissing their fellow guild member. He was jealous that she considered him a good friend, and had seemed to have some form of relationship with him. Of course Mystogan had the opposite reputation as he did. He didn't sleep around, in fact he kept to himself until going back to Edolas. In fact, Mystogan was the opposite of himself, and if Alaya was interested in someone like Mystogan, it was possible that Alaya wasn't the slightest bit interested in someone like Loke. The whole situation was foreign to him. Loke rarely worried about getting rejected and had never really been jealous before.

"What?" she asked him, sensing his tenseness.

"Nothing."

"You know I may not have much experience with people, but I'm not completely stupid."

Loke looked at her and sighed. "I may have overheard that you have kissed Mystogan." Alaya looked at Loke and then started to laugh. Loke's mouth dropped. "What are you laughing at?"

"Your reaction. I'm actually surprised you're jealous over that. I didn't think you cared either way."

"I do care, and I am jealous," he admitted, a little annoyed at being laughed at.

"Really?" Alaya seemed surprised and a little taken aback.

"Yes. I meant what I said Alaya. I know I have a reputation, but I don't want you as just a fuck buddy." Alaya flinched at the phrasing. "I like you, I care and I'm jealous of any man who has laid a hand on you, kissed you," Loke lowered his voice. "Touched you," he nearly growled out.

Alaya flushed. "I… you really don't have to be jealous of Mystogan." Even through the embarrassment, Loke could see that his words were affecting her. Her heart rate had sped up, her breathing had quickened. He could even smell the slight change in scent.

He leaned in close to her ear. "But I am."

Alaya cleared her throat and looked back at him nervously, scooting away an inch or two. She genuinely looked close to panic. Perhaps he was coming on a little to strong. "You shouldn't be. We weren't… romantic." That did not make him feel better to hear that she had decided to hook up with him while rejecting Loke. "Let me show you," she said when she saw the anger dance in his eyes.

"I most certainly do not want to watch him kiss you or whatever else he did," Loke spat out. He just told her he cared and now he wanted to play her past hook up in front of his eyes? He didn't think so. The images his own imagination created were bad enough, he didn't need the real thing seared into his brain.

"That's not what I meant." She shrunk away from him.

"What do you mean?"

"I'll kiss you like we kissed," she said and then her face turned bright red.

Loke softened a little. "I'm sorry, I didn't mean to get angry. I told you, I'm jealous. I've never been jealous before." That much was true. He usually got the girl he wanted and usually he wasn't that interested to begin with. Honestly, if his girlfriends saw other people, it never bothered him. He himself used to almost always have multiple relationships going at once.

She smiled a little. "I guess I'm a little more apt to believe that you want more with how jealous you're acting, unless you are just a really good actor."

Loke smiled at her. "I do want more. I'm not trying to play you." He leaned in again. "I would like it if you showed me." He liked the idea of her offering to kiss him, even if it was just for a demonstration.

Alaya blushed again. "Okay, but you cant..." She seemed to struggle for the right words, "be yourself."

"I'm sorry?"

"Just let me show you. Don't distract me." Loke's smile widened. "Don't look at me like that. Like you didn't know what you were doing earlier."

Loke chuckled. He was glad to hear he definitely had an effect past the hormones. "Fine, I promise."