Chapter 10: Tame me
You arrive at the gates of the Ampora estate sharply at 8am ready to dive into this no longer having any reason to hold back. You had spent most of the night calling Equius's place to talk to talk to Nepeta but he always just apologetically told you she was resting or in the shower. You were embarrassed when you woke up alone in Gamzee's bed and instead of facing the embarrassment of seeing his face or Karkat's you had just grabbed your clothes and slipped out of his bedroom window down the fire escape. It's not exactly the goodbye you wanted but what's another goodbye added to the million others from people giving up on you lately.
When you are buzzed into the gates Feferi tells you Eridan is upstairs waiting for you. You don't have time to ask her which floor his room is on before she runs down the hallways after Ampora Sr. trying to get him to fit his protein shake into his morning schedule. There are so many floors and doors on the hallways you get lost at least three times before finally finding the door that has a gold plaque on it reading "First mate Ampora." You faceplam at the title and proceed to knock before going in.
"Morning! I'm glad you found your way back, I rang you several times during the night to make sure you were alright but you didn't pick up." Eridan is just too fucking chipper in the morning for your tastes but you're distracted by all that from watching him get dressed.
"Sorry, I misplaced my phone for a bit, I'm not used to having it." You lie well; you'll have to learn how to do this every day.
He quickly puts on his shirt and blazer grabbing a folder off of his nightstand.
"I have to make sure our contract is ready and then we can go out for a bit if everything's sorted, are...you okay?" He stops rushing around and stares at you. You sit down on the edge of his bed staring down at your shoes.
You want to bring up Nepeta and what happened at the units; you need to know if he had anything to do with it but you had promised yourself you wouldn't make any trouble for him. He sits next to you and puts an arm around you
"Cheer up mate, no matter what it is that's wrong it'll settle itself, that's what I always say." He shrugs and gives you a big smile. You can't help but smile back at how dorky he is and follow him downstairs.
In the conference room two lawyers are present to witness you sign the contract with Eridan that is tying you to him for exactly one year. You don't know what spending a whole year with him will be like; the thought alone makes you want to stab yourself in the neck with the fountain pen you signed with. When it's all over he hugs you extra tight and Feferi comes in to bring you all bubbly which starts them on the worst spiel of nautical jokes you have ever had the displeasure of witnessing.
Eridan nudges you and starts giggling "Two fish are in a tank, one says to the other "It's a bit wet in here", and you wanna know what the other says? "Blimey, a talking fish!"
"Oh my cod a talking fish!" She doubles over in laughter and he laughs even harder at her saying "oh my cod".
Well, this is it Tavros, you have fallen into the seventh circle of hell, please pick up your book of sea jokes on your way in and commence to lose the small amount of coolness you actually have.
After a few more minutes you give him a pleading look as if you're going to go insane and he says goodbye to Feferi before leading you out into the main corridor.
"Oh my, that was just great. You know, you didn't laugh at a single one, are you still feeling down?" He puts his arm around you again and you both start walking towards the door.
"Just a little."
"Then, I've got to cheer you up again, come on I know exactly where we should go." He nearly vibrates with excitement as he drags you to the car. You drive cross town wondering where you're going but he only keeps saying it's a surprise.
After about an hour of heavy traffic he pulls up in front of a decent looking apartment building not too far from where Rufioh goes to school.
"More apartment hunting is supposed to cheer me up?" You ask as you get out of the car and stare up at the grey building.
"Just come on up for awhile you'll see." He winks.
You take the elevator up to the fifth floor and he drags you by the hand to a large wooden door with 5b on it.
Eridan takes a key out of his pocket` and opens the door rushing inside to show you around the spacey apartment, The floors are cherry hardwood and there's two bedrooms, one bathroom a kitchen, balcony and marble counters. He also informs you that the tiles in the shower are obsidian and he wants you to really appreciate that but you don't really know the difference either way.
"So, all the places I took you yesterday, you kept saying they were nice but you didn't really seem excited. I realized yesterday at the restaurant that I keep trying to impress you and it's not working. You like the simple things, you like your same old clothes instead of the designer ones I bought you. You even liked the employee cars we give to the staff better than the Crown Victoria. I didn't take you to all those places yesterday because I was trying to be a showboat; I just wanted to know what you liked."
"Then, I knew I had to get you a place that was like you, you know. Pretty average seeming on the outside but actually extraordinary inside." He smiles, proud of himself.
You walk to the window and take a deep breath. No had ever really said anything like that about you before, and no one had ever really went through so much trouble to try and find out what you actually like and don't like. Naturally, you love the apartment he picked out, it's not too big and charming, and you know you'll have fun moving in but not as much as you would if you could do it with Nepeta.
"Thank you, I'm not going to lie to you, sometimes I think you're just a gorgeous body with sand for brains and horrible tastes in comedy."
"But?" He raises an eyebrow.
"Oh there's no but, you are exactly all of those things." You reply sarcastically and he rolls his eyes.
"No, but really, you're a lot nicer, and more thoughtful than you seem. Thank you, for thinking of me." You pat his shoulder and walk over to check out the kitchen.
"I always do." He says quietly, but you pretend not to hear it.
You both spend the rest of the afternoon outstretched on the floor just talking and telling each other jokes. You even try to understand some of his stupid sea jokes and find yourself laughing at a few. When night falls you order Chinese takeout from a place just a across the street and eat while taking down the street towards the park.
"Okay, next question." He laughs pushing into you and making you nearly lose your balance on the slippery pavement.
"Do you ever make nautical innuendos in bed?" You laugh nearly choking on your forkful of noodles.
He laughs and blushes a little, "Just…once." He admits. You laugh some more until your throat feels sore from breathing in the cold.
"That is the most embarrassing thing I've ever heard, you win all the awards for awkwardness." You tease him a bit more and all he can do is roll his eyes.
"My turn, why do you take pills all the time?" He asks as if he's sorry he brought it up and you guess you would have had to bring it up eventually.
"I just like to have fun, sometimes. Other times I'm just trying to get away from everything. Don't you ever just want to get away from your life?" you throw the rest of your food into a trashcan and turn your back to him. You didn't want to think about any of this, you just wanted to pretend for one whole day that all the bad things about you didn't exist.
"Yes actually, I wanted to be someone else, someone cool who could go with the flow and that's how I met you, and now…here we are. But I do feel like someone else when we hang out; I feel like myself."
You turn towards him and try to give a full smile.
"Eridan, has anyone ever told you that you are the corniest person alive?" He laughs a little; relived that you aren't mad at him.
"Whale actually I haven't but thanks for letting minnow." He flashes a big smile and winks at you.
"Oh my fucking god, I will never forgive you for saying that!" You turn and start to walk away dramatically.
"Okay okay, last one tonight I swear." He chases after you threatening to carry you all the way back to the apartment if you don't slow down. You feel happy for the first time today. Sure, this isn't where you thought you'd end up but it distracts you from all the dark things tugging at the far corners of your brain.
Once he catches up to you he links arms with yours and clears his throat trying to be serious.
"I want you to stop taking the pills okay? I don't think you need them. I'll help you get rid of that stuff, you'll feel better." He shrugs. You can tell by the look in his eyes that he's worrying about you.
"I'll try." He smiles; pretty sure he can help you through anything or that helping someone detox is going to be easy. But you have met people like Eridan before, who say they like you as you are but eventually see you as something they can tame. You've lived on a ranch your whole life and you know better than anyone that there are just some animals you cannot break and you like to think you're one of them.