Note from author:
Last chapter for the night folks! Leave a review...
Chapter Ten:
Grissom knocked several times and then called her when she did not answer.
She rolled over and grumbled when she saw what time it was.
She wrapped the housecoat around her and made her way to the door.
He cringed when he saw her.
"You don't look well," he said.
"Thanks," she said as Grissom stepped inside.
"I brought you some soup," he offered.
The aroma should have smelled appetizing but it only made her cover her mouth.
"I'll put it in the fridge in case you change your mind," he said.
She let him take her into his arms for a moment.
"We uhm need to talk," she quivered.
He stepped back for a moment and looked at her.
"This sounds serious," he said.
"It is," she admitted gulping through bouts of nausea.
"Can it wait…until you're better?" he asked. "Sara, you're white as a sheet."
"No," she whispered. "It can't wait."
He sat down on the couch as she took the seat across from him.
"I uhm been using the patch," she began. "It uhm…I'm pregnant," she blurted out.
He stared at her.
"You're sure?"
"Two pregnancy tests…one here and one with my doctor," she said.
He sat back. "Morning sickness rather than stomach virus?"
"I wish it was the stomach virus and then at least I'd know it would be gone in another day or so," she groaned.
He nodded.
She did not know how to take his silence.
"Gil?"
"I'm processing this," he replied.
"Look, I thought you should know. I'm not asking you…" she gulped in air as she clutched the chair.
"Bad?" he asked.
She nodded.
"Did your doctor give you anything for the nausea?" he asked.
She walked over to the counter and produced the prenatal vitamins along with the nausea medication.
"Due date?" he asked.
She handed him the pregnancy statement.
"Seven weeks," he read.
"Yes."
"We'll need to take some precautions at work," he planned.
"I uhm spoke with Ecklie since I hadn't heard anything about my application," she began. "I asked for the swing shift position. I told him I was willing to switch to swing in order to get familiar with the other workers and assume some supervisory responsibilities. If he liked my work then he could promote me. If he didn't, I would remain on swing."
"Are you sure about this?" he asked.
"Yes, I am," she said.
He tried to pull her over to the couch but she stopped him.
"I uhm need to tell you something," she said. She took a deep breath. "I slept with Hank."
She could tell that her revelation hurt him.
"Sara, that's behind us," he said.
"No it's not. That day I came to your house and Sofia answered the door, I thought you and she were…I couldn't let myself get involved with Hank until I knew for certain that you and Sofia were together." She gripped the chair as she leaned forward. I thought there was no hope…I thought that you were sleeping with Sofia."
She looked at him.
"I uhm slept with Hank that day when I came back to my apartment and then you showed up and we…"
He felt like he had been kicked in the gut.
He exhaled sharply.
"This could be Hank's child…not mine," he stated.
"I'm not sure…I don't know," she began as she tried to control the nausea.
He said nothing as he sat there.
"Griss, say something," she pleaded.
"I don't know what to say," he stammered. "I uhm need to think about this."
She nodded.
He stood and within seconds he was gone.
She sat there as she felt as if the air had been knocked out of her.
She gulped as the pain intensified until she was crying uncontrollably.
He cursed over and over as he drove around aimlessly. He was shocked at first when she told him about the baby but then she had already removed herself from the unit, softening the blow, preparing to protect him while he could do nothing but try to force his brain to accept the possibility that she was pregnant with his child.
My child…
He could not imagine her carrying another man's child much less Hank's. He did not like the young man and did not like the idea of having him in their life.
What if it's Hank's?
How will she react?
Maybe she'll feel obligated to go back to Hank?
Maybe she really loves him…
He hated the situation.
He hated the fact that she had given herself to Hank.
She sleeps with Hank and then me…
How could she sleep with Hank unless she had feelings for him?
She may have chosen me but she had feelings for Hank and what happens when she has his child?
Will those feelings for me change?
How do I compete with a child?
He went into the lab and locked himself into his office.
Ecklie tapped at the door and he opened it.
"Heard you were here earlier than normal," said Ecklie. "I wanted to talk with you about Sara."
"She told me she applied for the supervisor position," replied Grissom.
"Do you think she's ready?" asked Ecklie.
"I think she's very qualified and her record speaks for itself," he said.
"I still have my doubts," he said sitting there and eyeing Grissom.
"She offered to transfer to swing and help out so she could prove herself," said Grissom.
"There's no guarantee I'm going to give her the position and if I do appoint someone else, she will have to stay on swing," he warned.
"She understands this," said Grissom.
"Good then she can start tomorrow," announced Ecklie.
Ecklie stood and looked at Grissom. "You don't look pleased."
"I'm losing a good worker," said Grissom.
"Somehow I think you'll gain more than you'll lose," replied Ecklie with a smile.
"I see no gain in losing her," he admitted softly.
Ecklie turned and left.
Grissom leaned back and closed his eyes.
It would be Sara's last night on graveyard.
She struggled to keep something down as she swallowed the medication with a glass of water. She stepped into the lab just before shift began. She passed the guys and they looked at her solemnly.
Her heart began to race and she wondered if he had told anyone about the pregnancy. She quickly made her way to the conference room and sat down just as the others were being seated.
"You could have told us," whined Greg.
"Told you?" she asked glancing at Grissom and then Greg.
"Come on Sara. When were you going to tell us you were moving to swing? Tomorrow?" asked Nick.
Sara's eyes widened.
"Ecklie approved the transfer effective tomorrow," explained Grissom. "You'll need to get your case files in order and turn them in by the end of shift."
She said nothing as she sat there and tried to take everything in. She thought that no decision would be made for at least a week or more.
Grissom proceeded to hand out assignments and once he was done, he picked up his notebook and left without another word.
"I think he's upset that you're leaving," explained Warrick.
He's upset for what I did…
He doesn't want a child…
He never said he wanted a child…
He probably thinks it's Hank's…
It could be Hank's…
"So, do we get to take you out or anything?" asked Nick.
"I still have the virus," she said. "It's probably best that I hold up in my office for most of the shift."
"Good luck," said Catherine. "You're going to need it."
Sara placed the case files into a stack. She had reviewed each one and made her notes. She held three case files due to court appearances. She stared at her desk. She had sat there for five years. This would be her last night. She knew she would be moving to a new desk on the other side of the building. She would miss everyone. She would miss Grissom.
She picked up the case files and took them to his office.
She noticed the light was off and the door was shut.
She tapped lightly but there was no answer.
She stepped inside and placed the case files in his chair and then shut the door.
Sara walked through the building in search of him.
"Judy, have you seen Grissom?" asked Sara.
"He left early," she said.
"Oh," replied Sara.
She grabbed the box with her things in it and walked out of the building. She shoved the contents into the backseat of her car. She knew it would be easier if she did not go back to the unit tomorrow but stayed clear for awhile.
She was exhausted by the time she arrived at the apartment. She struggled to stay awake as she ate something. She refused to let her emotions give way as she grabbed her old sweat shirt and bottoms and then curled up in the bed once she completed her shower.
Do I call him?
Do I tell Hank?
He wants a child…
He'll want to be a part of the child's life…
I'll have to share…
He may want custody…
He may marry Melissa and they may want custody…
She felt a sense of panic overwhelm her.
Hank could try to take this baby…
If he's married and I'm not…
Don't panic Sara…
You need to focus on your career…
A supervisor position is better…
You can better plan your hours…
I'll need childcare…
How do I find that on swing shift…
She sat up as she struggled to breathe…
Breathe in deeply…
Don't panic…
Just breathe…
She slept little as she sat by the phone and hoped that he would call.
He didn't.
His silence was like shards of glass and she felt beaten and battered as she stepped back into the lab and into her new shift. Ecklie escorted her to a new vacant desk. It was much smaller than her previous desk. He handed her a list of reports that was expected to be completed each week along with her own caseload.
"I expect you to run your cases through me each week. Keep me afloat of what is going on," he ordered. "The new recruits need guidance. They'll come to you with questions."
She said nothing as she listened intently.
"Is there any questions?" he asked.
"Uhm no. Ecklie, thank you for letting me transfer," she said.
He fumbled over his next words.
Her gratitude had thrown him off guard.
He disappeared as she threw the reports down on the desk and began going through the stack of case files on the adjoining desk. She stretched from side to side as she tried to work out the kink in her neck. She had spent the last five hours reviewing the cases for the shift as well as fielding questions from the workers. There had been few new cases and she was thankful since she was still struggling to get a handle on the back log of case files and reports. She grabbed for the bag of carrots in her lunch box and grumbled when she came up empty handed.
She was starving.
She managed to find a few crackers left over from the morning snack and finished them off.
By the time she finished with the cases, it was well past the end of the shift. She had managed to finish two reports in addition to the review of the case files. She seemed pleased with her first day. She grabbed her jacket and lunch bag along with a handful of paperwork and headed home.
She chose a drive through dinner in order to find time to finish the reports. She was too tired to cook these days and knew she would most likely just pass out as soon as she arrived home.
She was surprised to find him waiting on her doorstep.
He smiled at her and she wanted nothing more than to just drop everything onto the floor and fling herself into his arms.
"Hey kiddo," Brass said softly.
"Hey Jim," she breathed.
"I thought I would come by with dinner so you could tell me about your first day," he said.
"I picked up something," she said holding it up.
"I have Chinese," he offered.
"I can save this," she grinned.
"Good thinking," he said.
They sat at her table as she munched on the food.
"So tell me, how bad it is," he said.
"I don't think anyone has been keeping up with the reports since Sofia was demoted. I spent all day reviewing the case files…we're really behind. I did get two reports done…I brought some home…but Jim, I think I'm too tired to work on them," she said as she let the fork drop onto her plate.
"No one expects you to be current in a day," said Brass.
"I uhm not sure I can do this," she groaned as she leaned back and sighed.
"If anyone can do it, it's you," soothed Brass.
"I'm not as confident as you. The new recruits are coming every hour with questions and then there's the undersheriff who wants to know about cases I've never heard about…don't even think about searching the data base because they're not listed yet," she griped.
"How are you?" he asked sounding concerned.
"I'm…I uhm…I don't know," she finally got out.
"Gil told me about the baby," he confessed.
Sara felt her face redden.
"Did he tell you uhm everything?" she asked.
"He told me you weren't sure who the father is…he or Hank. My money is on Grissom."
She rested her head in her hands. "I've made such a mess of things."
"You can't just blame yourself for this. It takes two to make a mess," he said.
"Or three," she sniffled. "I never should have…" She stopped as she cursed under her breath.
"Don't go down that road," he warned. "Besides, I think there were five involved in this mess. Sofia and I didn't help matters."
She was quiet.
"You shouldn't overdo it," he chided.
"I'm trying. I need to show Ecklie I can do this job while trying to handle a caseload and then deal with the pregnancy and all the havoc it's doing to my system."
"Have you told Hank?"
She shook her head.
"I don't know what to do," she shared. "Part of me says to wait until the baby is born and then have a paternity test done but then I'm afraid Hank may use that against me and file for custody."
"You don't think he would…"
"At least he wants a child," barked Sara sounding bitter.
"Gil wants a child also," countered Brass.
"I didn't hear him say it," shot back Sara. "I haven't heard from him since he just walked out of here."
She pushed the plate away.
"He doesn't know what to feel right now," said Brass.
"What to feel?" she yelled. "Don't defend him."
"I'm not. I can see he's digging a pretty deep pit," said Brass. "Just don't stuff and roast him when he tries to come back and grovel."
She sat there quietly.
"Is there anything I can do?" he asked.
She felt the anger increasing over the situation.
Grissom never even asked that…
Just got up and left…
Left me with the pregnancy, the new job, the raging hormones, the nausea…
She shook her head.
He helped her clean up the mess and then headed for the door.
"Get some sleep," he said.
She nodded.
"You're scared, aren't you?" he asked.
"I'm fine," she managed to get out.
"Bullshit," he said softly as he held her.
"I'm glad about you and Sofia," she whispered.
"I bet you are," he said with a wink. "Sara, give him some time."
She wanted to scream about Grissom.
I'm pregnant and alone and he needs time to adjust?
When do I get time to adjust?
I'm scared of being alone…
I'm also afraid of what Hank is going to do…
She rubbed her broken wrist.
"That giving you any problems?" he asked.
"Just did a lot today. I'll be glad when the cast is off," she admitted.
"Just remember how you got it and be careful with Hank," warned Brass.
"Some things hurt far worse that a broken bone," she whispered to herself as Brass walked down the hall.
Note from author:
Yeah, I know. You want more chapters...so do I but not until in the morning. Leave those reviews.