I am so very sorry for the lack of updates this year, but I do hope you've been having a good year so far. the reason for the lack of updates is because one day i picked up a book and then 11 books later (in 11 days) i had finished a series that i have been trying to finish for years, so yay me.

Also to the people who reviewed and said they didnt hate me, thank you, again i am sorry i put you all through that. To the one that said they wanted to whack me...come at me bro haha :)

Fitz sat behind his desk in the Oval, people streamed in and out all day, but in all honesty he had no idea what they were saying or what he was agreeing to. It had been like this for over a week. He tried to return to how things once were, but that was easier said than done. It was still hard to comprehend that the life he had envisioned Olivia and himself soon having was now gone. And although his world had shattered into a thousand tiny pieces he had to go on pretending like nothing was out of the ordinary, that everything was fine and as it always had been.

He'd been so lost in his thoughts he didn't hear the knock on the door, only when it tentatively pushed open did he come back to reality. There she was, standing by the door, looking as put together as she always did when she came to the White House. If anyone looked at her, they wouldn't have known she had suffered a tragedy only a week ago.

He didn't want to let her go, he wanted to stay here all night, holding her in his arms, stroking her hair and laying kisses on her forehead while he watched her sleep. But he couldn't. He had to go. Fitz slowly moved from the bed, he didn't want to wake her, she had been through enough today and would need her rest. He quietly put his shoes back on and picked up his suit jacket and headed for the door.

"Fitz," he heard quietly coming from the bed. He turned to see Olivia sitting up and looking at him. She looked as emotionally drained as he felt. He wanted to envelop Liv back into his arms and fall into the bed, but something told him that wasn't where this was going.

"Liv," Fitz said, his lips quickly turning up at the corners. It was the first time he had laid eyes on her since that night. He had called to talk a few times, but each time she had either rejected his call or pushed him off the phone very quickly.

Olivia stood by the door, not daring to come any closer. She looked almost nervous, like she did whenever they didn't know where they stood in their relationship. Usually that was after a big fight, but this was unchartered waters, waters Fitz had never hoped they would have to sail.

"I'm going to need to time to deal with this," she said. Fitz understood. He felt absolutely terrible, and knew what he was feeling, she would be feeling it tenfold. "Alone."

He'd wanted to object, tell her that time apart wasn't what they needed, but he knew that was merely for selfish reasons. She would need time. And he would respect that. He would be there when she needed him. They were in this together.

Fitz stood up and walked around from behind his desk, but before he could get any closer Olivia put her hands warily out to show she needed space, and Fitz stopped. Alone, the word kept echoing through his head. What did 'alone' really mean? And how long would it last?

"How are you?" Fitz asked, Liv instinctively touched at her stomach and then quickly took her hand away, as if she remembered what happened.

"We have a campaign meeting," Olivia said pointing back out through the closed door. It explained why she was in the White House, but not why she was in his office.

Fitz turned around and picked some papers up off his desk. "You could have had an aide come tell me," he mumbled. If she really didn't want to see or talk to him, she had ways around it.

Fitz walked down the hallway from Olivia's bedroom. He slowed when he was halfway and took a few moments for himself. He breathed deeply, and closed his eyes to stop the tears that were wanting to form. He wanted to turn back around, walk back into Liv's room and tell her that alone time wasn't what either of them needed. He hated this, he was the most powerful man in the world, but right now he felt powerless.

Fitz walked out to the lounge, Olivia's red-haired friend was still out there. She promised she would stay with Olivia and make sure she was alright. And then he left. He had to pretend that this wasn't one of the worst nights of his life. He couldn't show grief. He couldn't show sadness. He wasn't allowed to.

Fitz heard the door open back up, and he quickly turned back. "Liv, wait," he called and she stopped in her tracks. He was surprised she turned back, he thought she would be out of the door first chance she had.

"What?" Olivia asked.

"How are you? Really?" Fitz asked again. He was determined for a proper answer. He knew the likelihood of Olivia giving him one, but that didn't deter him.

"I'm fine," she said placing her hand on her stomach, and then again like before quickly taking it away.

"You're not fine, Liv. You can't be. What you went through, it's not something you can just get over. And I know you haven't. You've been here less than five minutes and you've already touched at your stomach twice," Fitz said and Olivia looked away, as if she was ashamed that he noticed. "Which is perfectly alright, just stop saying that you're fine and you're over it. Because I can't see how you are, especially when I feel like there's a piece of me missing," Fitz finished. He held on to a glimmer of hope, that if he was honest and open about his feelings, she would be to. But as Olivia glanced around the room, all he could see was her eyes screaming 'run'.

"Fitz," Liv said warningly. He could sense she wanted to remain closed off, and hide away her feelings like she always did.

"You shouldn't have to do this by yourself," he said. He wanted to help. Whatever she was feeling, he wanted to know.

"I have Abby," Liv admitted, avoiding Fitz's stare. Although Fitz was glad that Liv had her friend, he was also jealous, because he didn't have anyone to lean on. He had told Cyrus, but he was far from a comforting shoulder.

"You have me too," he said, and Olivia turned back to him and their eyes locked. He was amazed she didn't look away. He could see the hurt, the guilt, and the pain that hid just underneath the surface. They stood still. Fitz just wondering what was going on in her mind. Would she believe him? Would she let him back in? Or would she keep her reinforced concrete walls up?

Olivia took the few steps to close the distance between Fitz and herself. When she got to him, she reached up and placed her palm on the side of his face, and laid a peck on his cheek. "I know," she said stepping back. Liv turned back to the door and walked out. Fitz knew he was meant to follow, to go to the campaign meeting, but he couldn't get over the sensation that her lips left on his cheek. Did that mean there was still a chance for them? Would Olivia soon open up to him? Would they be able to work through all this together? He hoped so.

What did you think?

I promise i won't read 11 books between now and updating again :)

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