Thank you for all of your entries! The winner will be announced in the next chapter. Sorry I've been taking so long with these chapters, I have school and other boring stuff like that. Oh, and just a reminder to you all: 80% of the stuff in this story was stolen from various authors around the world. I would like to give a big thank you to Tara Gillesbie for bringing us the wonderful classic, My Immortal, and everyone's favourite goff, Ebony Dark'ness Dementia Raven Way. (Other spellings include Enoby, Ebory, Enony, Evony, Ibony, Enobby, Egogy, TaEbory, Tata and Tara.) Finally, I would like to wish one of my friends a big happy birthday and I hope that she got lots of money!

MEANWHILE, BACK AT THE PLOT:

"Plot? What plot?" Annabeth snapped.

MEANWHILE, BACK AT THE SAD EXCUSE FOR A PIECE OF LITERTURE:

Number of times Nico has made eye contact with me in the past two months: thirty-eight.

Number of times I have been forced to throw things at the back of Nico's head to make him make eye contact with me: thirty-eight.

Number of times I have had my schedule rearranged in order to share a class with Nico: ninety.

Number of times Nico has had his schedule rearranged in order to not share a class with me: eighty nine.

Number of times I tried making Nico feel sorry for me: fifty

Number of times I tried to make Nico feel jealous: fifty-four

Number of times I tried to play hard to get with Nico: one-hundred and nine.

Number of times I tried flirting with Nico: forty six.

Number of times I have tried to impress Nico: 1, 3569.

Number of times my romantic advances didn't work: 13828

I sighed dejectedly as I looked over my list. My life sucked. I was beautiful, intelligent and athletic, but my life sucked. I rolled over in my bed to stare at Nico's hair in the glass case, my notebook falling uselessly onto the pillow. My life was over. I may as well be trying to hit on a rock. Nico hated me. It had taken my nine chapters to realise this, but I knew it was true. He hated me.

I continued to mope around in my black hole of misery, occasionally changing positions on my bed. I was starting to relate to some other angsty, overdramatic teen... what was her name? Mella Swan? Kella Swan? Gella Swan? Whatever. It didn't matter. I continued to stare straight ahead, lost in my depressing thoughts. My sad excuse for a plotline had died. It had been two months and ten days, and no quests had turned up. No prophecies had come. Nothing remotely interesting had happened. It was obvious that somewhere, up in the sky, my plot had been abandoned. That's what I was. A discontinued Mary Sue.

I shuddered and rolled over in bed again. Nothing mattered any more. Except for my hair. And my nails. And my fighting skills. And my power. And my complexion. But nothing else, apart from that. Nothing.

Except Nico. And my weight was pretty important as well.

After making a mental list of what did still matter in life, I gave an agonizing groan. Nothing, except for those three hundred and thirty two things, mattered. At all.

For those who don't know, irony often plays a part in Mary Sue stories. Just when the glorious main character thinks that all is lost, that she will have to live her life serving her sworn enemy while her true love is tortured right in front of her, someone will coincidentally and very conveniently come to save the day. I knew this, of course, but I was too busy wallowing in sorrow to realise what was just around the corner.

The sounds of shouting alerted my Sue Senses, and I sat up in bed. There was definitely shouting going on, and running feet, as campers ran past my cabin.

"The Hunters are here!" someone cried.

"It's Thalia!" another shouted.

I frowned. Who on earth was Thalia? I knew who the Hunters were, of course. But Thalia? Was she some long lost demigod who went missing on a Quest ten years ago?

Curiosity overwhelmed me. The Hunters would be interesting to meet (I could really help them improve their archery), and Thalia was obviously popular at Camp Half Blood. I dragged myself out of bed, checked my hair (which was still perfect, despite the fact that I had been moping in bed all day long), and headed for the door.

Outside, there was a steady flow of campers heading up to the Big House. A couple of Ares kids scowled at me, and I gave them the finger. I joined the line of kids hurrying towards the Big House, curiosity lighting my eyes. Would the Hunters be willing to accept a Mary Sue? If they were, then that might make Nico all jealous! Perhaps my plotline wasn't dead after all. I smiled, and continued up the hill.

The Big House stood in front of me, its front doors open wide, but the crowd which had formed was standing outside on the lawn. People were jostling forward, and it was only thanks to my Sue Skills that I managed to fight my way to the centre. My jaw would have dropped, but that kind of thing was for lesser mortals.

There was a group of girls there, about twenty of them, all wearing silver jackets and a quiver of arrows. I instantly recognised them as the Hunters. At their centre was a very serious looking girl, talking to Chiron. This was obviously Artemis, the mother of about fifty Mary Sues. I paused for a moment to wonder why, in Zeus' name, a human would have a kid with someone who looked like a ten year old girl, then dismissed it. Logic was practically non-existent in my world, anyway. I abandoned my brief stab at trying to weave some common sense into the plotline, and began searching for Thalia.

It took me three seconds to find her. Black spiky hair, a pale face and...

I froze. No way. Not possible. I was the representation of Big Three girl power! There was no way!

I desperately stared at her electric blue eyes. Children of Aphrodite had blue eyes! Perhaps the computer that was my brain was wrong! Perhaps she was a daughter of Aphrodite!

I examined her punk hairstyle. If she was a daughter of Aphrodite, then why had she joined the eternal lesbians club?

There was no getting around it. Thalia was a daughter of Zeus. I gnashed my teeth together. Nico was talking to her! Nico was very specifically not allowed to talk to anyone but me!

Furious, I crept over to where Nico, Thalia, Percy and Annabeth were chatting, trying to eavesdrop on their conversation (but in a good, honest way). Unfortunately just as I was about to unleash my Super Sue hearing upon the world, I felt a sudden wrenching feeling in my gut. I involuntarily stepped closer to Artemis and Chiron, their conversation echoing loud and clear into my ears.

"...I sense a disturbance in the Sueniverse" Artemis muttered. "Like a plotline suddenly twisting around completely... and the entire concept of logic being screwed up into a little ball and hurled off a cliff."

"Oh no," Chiron said, panic leaking into his tone. "That can only mean..."

"That a Mary Sue writer is trying to incorporate a twist into her story." Artemis said grimly. Chiron's eyes widened in horror. I understood why. When Mary Sue writers try to fit a twist into the story, it usually ends with a monster turning up for absolutely no reason and killing everyone.

"Wait..." Chiron said slowly, "What you said before... basically you're telling me that even though you have sixty five children, you are still a virgin?"

"That's right," Artemis snapped. "But we have more important issues. What do we do about this twist?"

"All we can do is wait," Chiron said heavily. "Hopefully, it's just some quest that a Mary Sue will be going on."

I finally regained control of my legs and walked purposefully back towards Nico and Thalia. I didn't care about plot twists and approaching doom. Nico was still talking with some daughter of Zeus! Thalia (what an ugly name) was talking in a low voice to Nico, Annabeth and Percy, as though she was sharing some deep, dark secret. I casually strode past them and knelt down to tie my shoe, even though I was wearing completely lace-less boots.

"It's true!" Thalia was snapping. "Clio is the Muse of history! She knows these things!"

"But... it's just not possible!" Annabeth said with an undertone of anger.

"Thalia, it does seem a bit..." Percy trailed off.

"How would you know?" she demanded. "Look, Clio told me very specifically, there is such thing. Ugly Mary Sues do exist!"

My jaw dropped. I was frozen in the act of tying my invisible shoelace. Did she just say what I thought she said? I felt dazed, disorientated. There was an imbalance in the Sueniverse. A plotline was slowly falling into place around me, and only one more piece of the puzzle was needed for me to understand it. I gave up all pretence and started staring intently at Thalia, waiting for her to open her mouth.

"Four shall get to leave this camp,"

Rachel's annoying voice echoed through the crowd, and instantly, everyone fell silent. Her voice sounded... strange, though, as though three Rachels were talking. I frowned.

"The random new character, the main character, the other guy, and the goff who is a vamp."

It was the worst excuse for a prophecy I had ever heard.

"They shall search for the Ugly Mary Sue,

They shall travel by boat in the ocean blue.

One will die a dramatic death,

One will successfully send everyone deaf,

The other two don't matter much right now,

So now I will go and ride a cow."

Almost everyone made groaning noises. I stared in the general direction of Rachel with disbelief etched all over my face. Ride a cow? Really? This prophecy was like every single Mary Sue prophecy rolled into one. It literally hurt my ears.

Wait a second.

Wait a second.

They shall search for the Ugly Mary Sue.

If an Ugly Mary Sue really did exist... then I could use her to convince everyone that Mary Sues were just like canon characters! (Only better.)And then Nico would fall unconditionally, irrevocably, completely, absolutely, totally, utterly, impenetrably, disreputably in love with me!

It was the perfect plan! I was standing proudly in the middle of the crowd, having seen the light. I would go on a quest! I would make Nico love me! And...

I would have to share the glory.

Ew. I wrinkled my nose. Who were these three other people who would come with me?

The random new character and the other guy. Rachel's power over the English language was almost as impressive as Ebony's.

They better not be more perfect than me. I didn't bother thinking about those two, instead skipping onto other, more obvious options.

The main character was obviously me, considering the fact that the interesting stuff only seemed to be happening to me. And finally...

The goff who is a vamp. I decided right there and then, that if any of the people reading my tale couldn't figure out who that was, I would send a Sue army after them. I glanced around at the boring people who were staring at me (probably because I was standing, absolutely frozen, in the middle of a crowd) and then hurried off. I had some research to do.