I'm backkkk! Thank you SO MUCH for you patience during my vacation :) A week with no wifi and barely any cell phone reception was interesting, but it was worth it. AS always, thank you for following along and reviewing!
Major Major Major THANKS To Bamberlee for editing this chapter :)
Daniel stands there, waiting for me in my own office.
At first glance, he looks fine. He fits in amongst the neat order of the bookshelves and the perfectly organized desk. Upon further inspection, he looks out of place; his suit is too pristine, tailored to fit him and ironed by his housekeeper. His hair is neatly parted, the heavy waves held in place, and it's obvious he's just had it cut. I realize I've never seen it grown out, never varied from the way it is now. He holds himself stiffly, like he's afraid he'll absorb some of the chaos simply by being here, and he cocks his head to the side, the slightest hint of impatience coming through.
He gestures at my wall, the newest plaque of accomplishment having been nailed up there, and his wedding ring gleams beneath the dull light.
The band is plain, but heavy and expensive. Symbolic of his marriage. Rings are a big deal in Erudite. The materials to have them made are scarce, but not impossible if you're willing to pay. But the sentiment behind it, the announcement to the faction he was no longer looking for someone to share his life with, was huge.
In Erudite, marriage is an important decision. It means you've found someone who shares your same ideals and ways of thinking. A mirrored ambition and work ethic. Someone of the same social status, someone you've pledged to spend your time with, working to better yourselves and your faction. It had better work out, because divorce in Erudite is rare. It is a glaring defeat, a mark on a spotless record, and it leaves a tarnished reputation behind.
Blythe's wedding ring is large and gaudy; weighty diamonds that seem to make her skinny fingers look even bonier, a band that matches. I can vaguely remember seeing it while she drank her coffee in the morning, the stones sliding to the side as she seemed to grow thinner and thinner with each passing day.
Despite barely speaking to each other, they never took their rings off. Their marriage didn't quite live up to its promise, but they accepted it. They kept it to themselves, a dark secret festering between them as they worked to keep up the front that the Coulter's were just fine. Happy in their extravagant lives, smarter than the rest, better than everyone else. They were doing their best to help their faction, no matter the cost.
Daniel was driven by his word, attempting to keep his promise to his wife, never wanting to give up.
Blythe would have keeled over before admitting she'd failed at something.
"Eric, you have a second? I was thinking maybe we could walk and get some coffee?"
"What?" My head snaps up, and I realize he's staring at me with a hopeful look on his face. "You came all the way here for coffee?"
"No," Daniel relaxes, taking my question as a sign I wasn't going to tell him to fuck off back to Erudite. "I came by to see Arlene and go through some updates with the infirmary. I thought maybe you'd be free. I wanted to catch up with you and Rylan. Jason, too. If you're free, of course."
"I'm not." I answer roughly, but I hesitate long enough that he steps closer to me.
His sudden appearance is very suspicious.
I remember Arlene saying he'd be arriving in the next few days, but his timing is suspect. I assume he's come down here to smooth things over with Rylan, but also to see what I'm doing. By now, Jeanine is livid she isn't my top priority. I've pushed her off, choosing to focus on my work here, and it has royally pissed her off. She may have played it off in her email, but Daniel's appearance tells otherwise.
She'd have gone straight to Blythe. Blythe would have gone straight to Daniel, insisting he try to pry an answer out of me because occasionally, I give him the time of day.
It's all the more irritating he's here, now, pretending to care about what is going on in my life. He's met Jason a handful of times, and only maintains contact with Rylan because Rylan was nice to him. Rylan's own father was no one important, and he found Daniel to be impressive. Smart. Driven. Compassionate.
I didn't.
Unfortunately, I don't have any time for this. I have other things more important than him that need my attention, and no time to ease the guilt he's pretending to be crushed by.
"I have paperwork to do. I'm sure you understand." I raise my eyebrow at him, staring him down.
He holds my stare easily. He's just as tall as I am, and he could be just as commanding.
If he had it in him.
But he doesn't, and his predictable apology is shit.
"You know I didn't want to cancel on Rylan. I told him I'd make it up to him."
He tries to smile, but his expression betrays the slick confidence he normally has. Putting someone's brain back together is no issue for him, but being a decent human being is. I haven't spoken to him since our phone call, and but his recent stunt has left me irritated on behalf of Rylan.
"Was there something else you wanted?"
My words are snapped at him, with zero respect, as my tolerance for him lessens to nothingness. To me, he doesn't deserve any, but as the head neurologist in Erudite, he's used to people being in awe of him. He's well liked, his position earned after years of dedicated work, and he's loved by his patients.
His family had come last.
Even now.
"I wanted to see how you are. Last time we spoke, you were busy, training…" he pauses, and I watch as he waits for me to say her name. "Everly. The one from Amity."
I watch him, blinking once at his audacity.
"No, the other one from Amity." I snap.
My father, quite possibly the smartest man in Erudite, misses my annoyance completely. I'd made the mistake of telling him her name, and now he was here, that information spurring him on. "You mentioned she was tired. I was thinking maybe you had a second and we could talk about a few ways to remedy¬—"
"I don't have a second. Maybe Rylan does. I have the book you let him borrow. I'm supposed to return it to you." I stare at him, and I can see defeat slide over him. Pointing out he'd bailed on Rylan was a dick move, and he reacts to it instantly. He swallows heavily, his pristine jacking wrinkling as he shifts in place, and frowns at me.
"I got held up in surgery. I called him to apologize but he didn't answer."
"What a shame." I answer coldly.
He frowns further.
"You know I have a busy schedule. I can't always get away when I think I can."
"I'm well aware of how busy you are," I answer smoothly. "You don't have to explain it to me. Rylan's probably in his office. Knock yourself out."
"Eric," He implores, reaching out to grab my arm. His touch feels strange, unfamiliar. I stare at him darkly before jerking away from him.
"I'm not sure what you expect me to tell you. Everly is fine. I'm fine. Busy. Nothing new has happened since we last spoke."
I regret saying her name again. I'd slipped up by saying it to him the first time, and I'd been slipping up by calling her Everly left and right. It seems like I now thought of her as Everly, the unconscious decision an embarrassing one.
"You know, I just…I heard you and she were close. I assumed maybe…" Daniel stops and looks at the wall. For once, he's fumbling with his words. His normal eloquence is gone, lost as he grasps at straws. "You know how rumors can be. Your Aunt seems a little too concerned with what you're doing. She's not thrilled with how busy you are with this girl. Blythe was…in the middle of it. I thought maybe I should check on things before they got out of hand."
I stare at him, wondering how on Earth he can be so stupid.
I certainly don't need him or his help.
"Go back to Blythe. Tell her to mind her own business. If she thinks she's going to send you down here to check up on some rumors, she can think again."
"Eric," Daniel steps directly in front of me, preventing me from leaving. "Look, I apologize for not coming by when I said I would. You have every right to be mad on behalf of your friend.
"You don't have to apologize to me. I don't give a shit what you do." I shrug, and he shakes his head in obvious disappointment.
"You were fine on the phone. I'm not sure what's happened since then, but I have responsibilities. Just like you do."
I stare at him, hating the mere sight of him and the suggestion I'd appreciate his comparison. Flaking on me was one thing but flaking on someone he'd made a promise to was another.
Wanting to meet Everly, waltzing in here like he was father of the fucking year, concerned over a girl he'd never met, was something else entirely.
"Enjoy your visit." I tell him, and I stalk off.
He doesn't say anything else or try to come after me, but that's fine with me.
I make it halfway down the hallway before I run into Arlene. She eyes me intently, then grabs my arm to stop me. I knock her hands free, whirling around to look at her.
"You fucking liar." I bark. "You said he was thinking of coming by not he'd be here the next fucking day."
"Calm down, Coulter." Arlene glares at me, slapping my hands away from her. "You're acting like a child. He just wanted to say hello."
"My ass! He wanted information for Blythe and you know it."
She raises an eyebrow at me, and I have the urge to stab her.
"I'm far from stupid. I know why he's here. She sent him because she doesn't have the balls to come down here herself."
"Would you have seen her if she was here?" Arlene looks at me like I've lost my mind. "You'd have spoken to her but not your father?"
"NO!" I roar at her, and she holds both of her hands up. "Neither of them deserve two seconds of my time. I have things to do that don't involve either of them." I hiss, and I look to the side of her, realizing I'm a second too late. Daniel has followed me out of my office, and once he realizes I'm still here, he heads toward Arlene and me with a stupidly determined look on his face. "I have nothing more to say."
Arlene steps close to me, elbowing my side, hard.
"Give him one minute of your time and I won't tell him you're engaged."
My stare flies to her, daggers right at her stupid face, but she smiles brightly, greeting Daniel.
"Sir, lovely to see you. Welcome back. Everyone in the infirmary is excited you're here."
"Great, I look forward to seeing what you've accomplished." Daniel answers tightly, and he swings his stare at me. "Eric, I'm sorry. You're right. But I didn't come down here because Blythe asked me too. Maybe we can—"
"No. I'm late. I'll see you around."
I shove past Arlene, throwing a mock salute at him, and I'm gone. Down the hallway, past Rylan's open office door, past the break room. I take the stairs two at a time, until I'm at one of the lower levels. I storm past the few members down here, not greeting anyone, and ignoring the nosy looks as I walk by.
I keep going. When I find the door I want, I throw it open without knocking, stomping through angrily.
"Well, well, well! To what do I owe this surprise?"
I'm greeted with utter delight, and a large, blinding grin.
I return the greeting without much enthusiasm, shrugging off my jacket and handing it over to Christian.
"This way." He gestures, and I head into the abyss of fabric, all shades of black, maroons and reds, and I ignore the fact that every so often, there's a scrap of a lighter one peeking out from the racks. The further back we go, the more of it there is, until I swear, there's nothing but pink fabric strewn around his workroom.
"Did Everly like the jacket? Did it fit? It looked good, didn't it?"
Christian stares at me from behind glasses that are too large for him. He's slender, his own outfit tailored to fit his skinny frame, something trendy and oddly fancy. His pants are so skinny they might as well be glued to him, and they end above his ankles. His boots are far from the combat boots everyone else wears; his are shiny and impractical, a large polished buckle over the zipper on the side and I fucking swear they sparkle. His shirt is fitted, and the sleeves are rolled up, stuck with a bunch of needles as though he'd been sewing the moment I walked in. His hair is artfully arranged, spiked up and flat ironed into perfection, and he flips it out of his eyes every so often.
He takes my measurements quickly.
He smirks and smiles the entire time, pulling on the sleeves of my shirt and making a dissatisfied sound at the sight of my old uniform.
Despite the fact he'd designed it.
He is the head designer in Dauntless, a position he'd taken immediately upon passing his initiation. His being here was a bit confusing, because one quick glance at him and you couldn't help but wonder how. Everly was skinny and little, and Christian wasn't much bigger than her. I'd learned he'd fled from Candor in some strange panic, making the dramatic decision to transfer to Dauntless. Once he arrived, he never gave up. He fought for a spot here, and somehow finagled his way through initiation with minor injury. He'd ranked well enough to pass, his scrappy fighting pushing him on, and his fear landscape scores enough to secure his life here.
He'd then melodramatically and gracefully bounced off to begin his new life, smiling widely at those he'd beat out when they sulked down to have a uniform fitted for them. He'd never worked a patrol route, never even been in the control room, and there was a rumor he had a very fabulous loft all to himself, decorated in a sophisticated manner. He was funny, lightning fast at whatever he did, a bit eccentric, and blunt.
Very blunt.
The first time I'd met him I scoffed, but a day later, he'd handed me a jacket and uniform pants that would have made Daniel's suit look like shit.
I'd never known we needed a designer, let alone a head designer. Maybe he'd given himself the name, but it suited him. He took the job seriously, outfitting everyone around him, and making sure our uniforms were top notch. He oversaw a very small staff who worked to produce the garments and was granted a rather large space to house his projects.
His clothes were appropriate to the Dauntless faction, but flashy enough they stood out from the other factions.
Everly had worn none of them.
Carol had neatly folded her laundry, separating it from my clothes. The fabrics were flimsy and light, as were all her clothes. She'd bought only things that would slide down when she wore them; dresses that would show how small she was, and tank tops that revealed more than just her shoulders. I'd left the pile on her dresser, wondering where on Earth she thought she was wearing them. No one really gave a shit what anyone one wore here, but still, they weren't Dauntless in any way.
They were innocent looking. Sort of. Not really.
Soft.
Delicate.
Revealing.
Her leaders' jacket was the first thing she'd worn that was heavy. Stiff, like armor. Black. It fit her, giving the impression she was an important member of Dauntless. The first official of many uniforms she'd receive, especially now.
"It looked good. How'd you know her measurements?" I cross my arms while he skips over to type away at the laptop on his workspace. His desk is littered with measuring tape and buttons, needles jabbed into all sorts of things, and a dozen half made items.
"I eyeballed them, Eric." He answers quickly, typing at a frightening speed. "I've seen her walking around. I was behind her the other day and I just sort of followed her until I had a good idea. It wasn't hard to figure out what size she'd need. I will need her measurements in the future, but for now, I can go off my estimate. She's a little smaller than I prefer. I had to adjust every aspect of the jacket, but it turned out better than expected."
He looks up at me, and grins. Brightly.
"She's very pretty for someone from Amity. I sometimes think they look…so…plain. Like someone left them in the sun for a few years. You know, I offered my services once. Prairie skirts are so out of style and I had this great idea to give them a new look. But Johanna said no, they were good. They preferred to make their own clothes and kicked me out of her office. Why, I'll never know."
He shakes his head, insulted as ever.
"Thank God, Everly doesn't like those skirts, though. I saw her when she got here. I saw what she bought, too. She doesn't have a great idea of how she should be dressing, but she will."
I look over at him curiously, and he prints out a paper for me. It has a bunch of measurements on it, a balance of exactly zero points, and his name in a flashy logo.
"Here. Have her come back in a few weeks."
"Why?" I ask, grabbing my jacket and shrugging it on. Even I could admit the compound felt cold now. The first storm would hit soon, and with our conservation mode, the heating systems were barely turned on.
Everly must be freezing.
"You have a dinner coming up." Christian announces, slowly, like I'm mocking him. "Every year you go. She'll need something to wear. She bought a dress but it's nowhere near formal enough for what she'll need. Send her to me. I'll make her something."
I stare at him, buttoning up the last button on my jacket, and the hilarious realization that he assumes I'm bringing her to the Leadership Dinner with me smacks me in the face.
"You think I'm bringing Everly?" I say the words with a bark of laughter, the idea of dragging her to this event laughable. "Why would I bring her to that? It's for the Leaders of the factions. I'm not bringing anyone. Let alone her."
Christian walks over to me and smiles in an odd manner. Like he knows something I don't.
"Eric." He reaches up, patting down the collar of my jacket, cocking his head to the side to examine it intently. "God, why did I pick this fabric? It's hideous."
"Don't ask me." I snap while he rolls his eyes.
"It was rhetorical. Anyway, just send her my way when she's ready. I already have some ideas. Either way, I'll send your new jacket when it's done. It'll only take a day or so."
He steps away from me, lost in his daydreams of dressing Everly in something for a dinner she isn't attending, and he barely notices when I leave. His words bother me on a whole other level, not just that he wants to dress her, but that Christian would think I wanted to bring Everly to such an event.
I don't.
I don't need her looking out of place, surrounded by the heads of the factions, wondering why on Earth I'd brought my initiate along.
By the time I return to my office, it's quiet. Daniel is gone, and I sink into my desk chair, grateful for the silence.
She comes up to me in the kitchen.
I'm standing there, staring at the same cabinet she'd smacked her head on, when she walks right up to me, right up to me and smiles.
Sweetly.
"Hi Eric." She says my name slowly, and I stop doing nothing to look down at her. "I just wanted to tell you, before you start cooking something…I'mgoingtoeatwithChristinatonight."
She says the last part in a rush of adorable confidence, only faltering when she moves her hair out of her eyes and continues, nervous I might tell her no.
"She asked me earlier and I thought it would be fun. I think…we're eating in the mess hall."
I narrow my eyes at her.
I don't care if she goes down there to eat. Really, I don't. She's technically free to come and go as she pleases, but she's never asked. She's been fine with just me, and it's easier this way.
But she's looking up at me curiously, and I shrug. While the food down there is garbage, eating it for dinner won't kill her. Not to mention the fact she's already been officially accepted into The Leadership Program, so I have no worries that someone will try to recruit her for some dumb position or fill her head with some bullshit that working alongside Christina would be a blast.
Christina's company is also garbage but making a big deal out of it will only reveal to Christina there is something going on. My hesitation will give her the allusion she has the upper hand. I flash back to the image of myself, standing between Everly's legs, my hands gripping her hair tightly as I gave into the urge to rip her clothes off. When I blink, she's still looking at me, waiting for my answer.
I smile, tightly, and wave her away.
"Go."
Her expression changes to a scowl.
"Am I not allowed to go?"
"Oh no, you're allowed to go. Have fun. Tell Christina I said hello." I announce, internally cringing at the petty tone in my voice. I'd meant to sound indifferent, but it had come off far more petulant than planned.
"You'll be okay? By yourself? Maybe your friends could come over again?" She helpfully suggests, looking very concerned at leaving me by myself.
How ironic.
I glare at her.
"I'm fine." I snap, insulted she'd think I can't eat alone. I don't enjoy her company that much, anyway. "I don't need anyone to come over. Besides, I have plans. I was going to tell you you'd have to make yourself dinner tonight."
"Oh." She answers, surprised, but she bounces back and smiles again. "That works out then. Okay, well I'll be back soon."
She turns around, thrilled I was just fine without her, and I catch her arm.
"Wait." I bark, realizing if I leave as well, she'll have no way of getting back in. "Hold on."
I let her go, storming past her and into the bedroom. I throw my dresser drawer open, rifling through a few things before I find what I'm looking for. When I return, she's waiting by the same counter I sat her upon, and I notice she's dressed like it's summer.
Bare shoulders.
Leggings.
Nothing at all to keep her warm.
She's about to get an unpleasant surprise when she finds out Quinten doesn't get heating as a part of his budget.
"Here." I press the keycard into her palm, and she looks up at me.
"Is this your key?" She asks, and I shake my head no. Like I'd hand over the only key to my apartment so she can go traipse around with Christina.
"It's an extra one. You'll need it to unlock the door if I'm not back. Unless, Max's key has started working." I dryly answer her, and her expression changes.
To this sweetly, grossly, knowing smile. I feel ill at it, especially when she doesn't look away for a beat.
"Thank you." She happily takes it from me, her fingers touching mine.
The two of us stand there, her skin cold, until I'm the one to break way.
I watch her leave, resentfully, before heading into my room to grab my jacket.
"I heard you opened up the program again."
Peter is glued to my side, winding through the swarm of members with ease. He follows me to a table, his beady eyes frantically searching to make sure he can sit there, refusing to give up this precious opportunity. It had been a long time since I'd seen him, but not long enough. He'd been persistent in attempting to join the Leadership Program since he'd first heard about it. He fancied himself superior to those around him, and he felt his talents were best served by joining the highest rank possible.
I thought otherwise.
I'd only come down here because he'd asked to meet, claiming he needed to talk about one of his patrol squads. He'd somehow slithered his way to a management position there, and we both knew his route was fine. Boring. Routine. It was an easy position and an easy section. But I'd grudgingly agreed, because I wanted to see what Everly was doing.
It took a lot in me to admit that. I felt nauseous, thinking I was going to check up on her, but really, it was Peter's idea to meet here.
I regretted it immediately.
I had found him tolerable during his initiation. He was sneaky and sly, a total asshole as he tried his best to secure a high rank, and very eager to get on my good side. I'd indulged him a bit, using him where I could, but once his initiation was done, I never bothered to check where he ended up.
Now, he's thrilled I'm next to him, trying to get my attention as he pleads his case.
I don't pay any attention to him.
My sights are focused on Everly, sitting a dozen tables away from me. Of course, it only takes a moment before she notices me sitting there, her eyes finding mine, and she throws me a fairly amused look.
"Eric." He says my name loudly, and I turn to give him a dark look. "Did you hear me?
"No." I bark, tapping my fingers to distract myself. She's turned to face Christina, the two of them talking about something, and she looks like she's having fun. Every so often, Christina looks at me, disapproval all over her face and she doesn't bother hiding it. I can tell she thinks I'm spying on them, unwilling to let Everly out of my sight.
Which is far from the truth.
"The program isn't reopening. I'm taking on a select few. It's not open to the general faction."
"Seriously, dude. You're joking, right?" Peter asks around a mouthful of his hamburger, and I stare at him in disgust. "You aren't letting people sign up? Come on."
"No." I answer dully, and I find Everly in the crowd again. She looks different than when she's in my apartment. Her food is as untouched as ever, but she's laughing at something Christina said, and she looks happy. My chest tightens at the sight, the unfamiliar uneasiness clawing its way up every time she grins.
Christina leans in, whispering something to her, and Everly's eyes widen. I can only imagine the information Christina has just divulged, and there's little doubt its relating to me.
I take it as my clue to leave.
I stand up abruptly, ignoring the yap of Peter and his protest of 'won't I please just consider him after all he's done?'. I leave with my shoulders thrown back, my stare straight ahead, and a look of sheer boredom on my face.
The sight of Everly, her face lit up as she giggled alongside Christina, stays in my mind until I reach my apartment.
I go to bed alone.
I violently brush my teeth, staring in the mirror, mentally berating myself for wondering when she'd come home. I didn't care; she could stay out all night if she pleased, and her ass would be on the line for it. I didn't care if she was tired, and I certainly didn't care what she was doing. I slam my toothbrush in the cup and rinse my mouth.
This also wasn't really her home, though it sort of was, especially since I'd declined an apartment being assigned to her.
I fall into bed, screw my eyes shut, and do my best to doze off.
I wake up when she climbs into bed.
It's late; far later than Amity should have been out, and I know she'll be exhausted in the morning. But it's not my job to point that out to her. She'll know it the minute she has to get up in the morning. So, I go back to sleep, letting myself drift back off, until she presses herself against me, wearing next to nothing.
I blink at her.
I'm half asleep, but I can see she's facing me, her hair falling everywhere around her.
"I didn't mean to wake you up."
She says the words softly, but comfortably. Inviting her to sleep in my bed was a strange prize, but I can't say I dislike it. I'm too tired to answer her, so I shut my eyes and reach for her.
If she's going to climb into my bed like it's her rightful place, then she'll sleep how I want her to. I grab her hips, the bare skin tempting beneath my fingers, and I yank her forward. Once she's close to me, the fabric of her tank top against my chest and her naked legs resting against my own, I reach for her arm. I pull it over me, and her fingers find my hair immediately.
I should feel embarrassed that I want her like this. I've never wanted Ashley to sleep anywhere near me, never even entertained the thought. But I make sure Everly is as close as possible, pleased when she touches my hair. I sigh when they curl in, thinking of her with Christina. Smiling. Laughing. Probably confirming I had, in fact, kissed her. My head falls forward, heavy with sleep, and I keep my eyes shut.
I hear her mumble my name, but I fall asleep with her against me, giving in to the dark fact that I like her like this.
I decide, my mind slowed down, that she'll sleep here during her Leadership Training as well.
Her toothbrush sits on my bathroom counter.
I squint at it while I brush my teeth, thinking of her in here last night.
I rinse my mouth out and stick the toothbrush next to mine without a second thought.
"Higher."
I instruct, narrowing my eyes as Everly pauses halfway up the train tracks.
Her survival training was new, something we'd implemented when we realized they'd head out with minimal skills under their belts other than fighting and shooting. So, with Harrison's help, we'd come up with a few obstacles they might encounter. Scenarios that could occur, that would require physical strength and quick thinking. Four hadn't loved the idea, no clue why, but he'd been outnumbered, and they were inserted near the end of the initiation.
I'd walked Everly out of the compound for our run. I could tell she was tired, because she was silent, rubbing her eyes throughout most of it. She'd looked tired all day, until we arrived at what was once a functioning set of train tracks. Now they were dilapidated; they hadn't been used in ages, but the support beams were still standing. Crackled and shifted, they gave way to several sections that caved in, revealing exposed iron beams and cavernous holes.
I'd told her to climb to the top.
She'd looked at me slowly, waiting for me to tell her I was kidding, but I wasn't.
I'd done it myself multiple times.
It wasn't hard. It did require some upper body strength and coordination, and there was always the risk Everly might slip or panic. But she'd have to climb it, and quickly.
If she were being attacked, no one was going to tell her to take her sweet time while she tried to scale the thing.
I caught the look she'd thrown at me, one of surprise and uncertainty, but on my nod, she immediately went for it. She ignored the snow flakes, weak little things floating down from the sky, melting instantly in her hair. They weren't sticking just yet, but they would soon.
I lean against the structure opposite hers, crossing my arms over my chest and observing her for the sheer purpose of scoring. She pauses right at the midway point, her foot resting on a section of concrete sticking out, reaching up for anything she could pull herself up to. I wait for her to continue, her form flush with the concrete, and she looks down at me.
"Higher, Amity. I didn't say stop." I call out to her, and she shakes her head.
"You're going to be really bored after I fall to my death," She calls back down to me, stretching again, her fingers nearing the hole she's looking for.
"Surely," I respond, not at all impressed with her attempt to get me to call her back down. I stroll over toward the pillar she's currently on, and I reach up, testing where I can reach.
Then I pull myself up.
Effortlessly.
Upper body strength isn't anything I'm lacking, so it only takes me a minute of climbing before I'm close to her. I watch her scramble, a smirk crossing my face and she works hard to stay ahead of me, pulling herself up quickly.
After a silent minute, her boots just above my gaze, I reach over.
"You'd better hope I don't make it up there before you," I call out as a warning, even though she's doing fine.
Four's class wasn't even out here.
They were indoors, scaling a mock wall, with a mat beneath them. I suppose he found the risk of them falling, and predictably dying when they hit the pavement below, too dangerous.
He should live a little.
I reach over and grab Everly's ankle, pretending I'm about to use her as leverage.
"Eric!" She yelps my name, clinging on for dear life.
I roll my eyes, pulling myself up beside her. I sneer at the panicked expression on her face, before continuing on. She wasn't afraid of heights as far as I knew, and she'd shown no signs of being scared so far.
She grits her teeth. I can see her trying not to wince, as she does her best to keep up with me. I reach for the next crevice I can find, and it's only a second before I pass her completely. I continue ahead, nearing the top much faster than she could ever dream of, and I triumphantly reach the top. I pull myself up and over, wiping my hands off and waiting for her.
"Come on, Amity. You'll have to climb faster than that if you want to pass." I call out, but I don't think she can hear me. The wind has picked up, and the snow is now falling quickly. The ground is growing damp, and she'll need to work faster if she plans on getting up here before a storm hits.
I see her hand reach the top of the cement, fumbling to grasp onto something, and I immediately notice she has no real traction. I lunge forward without thinking, grabbing her wrist with one hand, and I can feel the moment she loses her grip. She's seconds away from slipping. I quickly reach my other hand down to grasp her arm and I yank her upward. Despite being over the edge, it's not hard to pull her up. I stumble when her boots catch the edge of the cement, and she lands against my chest. I'm knocked backward, falling onto the ground with her in my arms.
She lays there, her skin cold, mumbling an apology and trying to catch her breath. I can feel her heart racing, the panic subsiding slowly as she realizes I've got her.
I wouldn't have let her fall.
I keep her against my chest, the cold air whipping around us, until she's calmed down.
"Sorry," she gasps, having absolutely nothing to apologize for.
I shrug, holding onto her tighter, and she stays perfectly still, leaning back into me.
"Just try not to die during our next exercise."
We walk back to the compound together.
I could have made her scale the thing again or moved on to some of the crumbling buildings to the side of us, but I decided it was time to walk home. The snow was beginning to stick, and the clouds were looming overhead, gathering to darken the sky. I grant her a reprieve, watching her shiver beside me, as we walk through the gates.
Winter had always been my favorite season.
I'd always liked the cold air, the brisk feeling it brought, and the sharpness of it. I liked the chaos of the winter storms, the way they wreaked havoc on everything they touched, and the power they held. They frequently shut down the factions with their actions, and they had the ultimate authority over everyone. I disliked being hot, never had the urge to lie in the sun for hours and found the summers unpleasant.
There was no uncertainty Everly hated the winter. She hugged her arms around herself while we walked back, her work out clothes and jacket doing little to protect her from the chill. Her gaze flicks to the sky, to the darkening storm clouds, and she sticks close to me. The guards wave us through when we approach the first security clearance. We head through the large doors, and I lead her through the dark hallways.
She stops in the training room.
It's oddly noisy. Four's class is busy scaling the mock wall that was set up earlier this morning. They are all terrible at it, despite their upper body strength giving them an advantage over Everly. She and I watch as two of them near the top, then falter when they repel back down. One panics, the height throwing him off, and his partner yells at him as they slowly make their way down.
Her eyes widen at the sight before her, and her head whips around to me.
"So, if they fall, they get the luxury of falling onto a mat?" She raises her eyebrow at me, and stares at me in a daringly accusatory manner. "You made me scale the side of the train tracks!"
I try hard not to smile. I'd taken her outside to give her a dose of the real world. Climbing a fake wall wasn't anything close to what she'd done, and there was nothing wrong with a healthy dose of fear. She was never in any real danger, and her life flashing before her eyes would only further her appreciation of my methods.
"If you are out there under some sort of attack, there will be no mats if you happen to fall," I answer flippantly. I watch as Four commands the next set of initiates to go, and I shake my head when they take off. "I wasn't worried you would fall."
"Well, I'm glad you were so sure about that," she mumbles.
I feel surprisingly slighted by her words. I wouldn't have let her fall. Not only would I have had to fail her for not completing her session, I really didn't want to watch her crash into the ground from two stories up. I step closer to her, until I'm next to her, my side against hers. I bend down, hissing at her while Four yells at someone to look where they're reaching.
"Did you really think I would let you fall to your death?"
"Well, no." She looks up at me, taking in my expression, and she looks back at Four's class. "Do you think I can climb that wall faster than Four's class?"
I take it as an apology.
I gleefully shove her forward, her dark hair bouncing behind her.
"Let's find out."
She beats his initiates easily.
I stand next to Four, arms crossed over my chest, and a smirk on my face as she climbs past them with a grin on her face. She reaches the top first. Once she reaches it, she looks down, her gaze searching for me, and I nod in approval. I cock my eyebrow at her- silently pointing out how stupid the fake wall is, and she smiles in response.
I'm not at all surprised she'd surpassed the others. The train tracks had been a challenge, and her arms had to be burning, but she went for it, just like everything. I squint at her tiny form as she hangs on, waiting for the guy next to her to reach the top, and Four clears his throat.
"You made her do it outside? Really?"
He looks at me like I'm insane, and I shrug.
"She did great. No issues at all." I pause, waiting until he looks at me. "Your class looks like they're having fun. Did you borrow these mats from the day care center?"
He throws me the darkest look he can, like a child who just got told they can't have dessert, before he stalks off to stand closer to the wall. His initiates are all watching intently, annoyed looks on their faces, until it happens.
The boy beside her loses his footing.
He flails about wildly once his balance is gone. He tries to grab onto something, anything, but the closest thing next to him is Everly. My eyes widen in disbelief as he grabs onto her and takes her down with him. It looks like she falls forever, but it's only seconds before she slams into the mat below, landing on top of him.
I take off instantly.
I swear at Four loudly, catching the look of disbelief on his face.
"You're dead." I hiss at him, my boots sinking into the mat as I near Everly. She groans, starting to slowly push herself up, and I reach for her. I grab her beneath her arms, kicking Four's initiate in the leg as I pull her up. Once she's untangled from him, I help her to stand.
She's fine.
I can tell there's nothing terribly wrong. She can stand up, her neck hasn't been snapped, and her eyes are clear. But she puts both of her hands on her side and winces, and I'll bet she landed on the edge of his boot.
"Kevin! I said pay attention to where you place your foot!" Four yells, his arms crossed in front of his chest. He swears loudly, his gaze focused on Everly and me. "Is she alright?"
I ignore him. I let go of Everly's waist, sliding my hands beneath her shirt until I find her ribs. She cringes immediately, her skin raw where I touch it, and she bows into my chest while trying to push my hands away.
"That hurts, Eric!" She gasps, and I glare at Four over her head. This is solely his fault. Had he taught his class what he was supposed to, she wouldn't have gotten injured.
"Why is your class always a complete disaster?" I snap. He looks down at Everly, still against my chest, and his expression is apologetic. Sort of dismayed, but mostly apologetic. Until he looks at me.
"They aren't," he retorts, his eyes flashing angrily. "There's no way you can possibly think that happened on purpose."
My fingers tighten. They dig into Everly's skin, and she groans.
Not out of delight, either.
"Eric." She wiggles a bit, trying to dislodge my fingers, and I only hold onto her tighter.
"Your class should be able to properly scale the wall by now." I inform him, and she elbows me in the stomach. I chalk it up to her being traumatized by Four's class trying to sabotage her, and I let it slide.
"It's their first attempt," Four defends himself. He moves to take a step toward us, but he's momentarily blocked when Karl wanders over, a curious grin on his face.
"Everly! Dang, you are fast! Did you guys practice before us? You didn't look down once." Karl cheerfully congratulates her with a big smile on his face. He seems taller than the last time I saw him, much stronger now, and I narrow my eyes at him.
His stare is glued to her, his blue eyes never leaving her face.
My grip intensifies.
"Eric, I can't breathe," she gasps, and I loosen my grip the tiniest bit. I don't know what I'm really expecting to happen if I let go completely. That she'll limp away? Sprint off somewhere? Either way, I keep my hands on her, especially when she answers him.
"No, I had lots of practice when I scaled the train tracks."
Karl throws a nasty look at the fake wall behind him, and his trainer. "Seriously. How cool. We've uh, been here all morning."
Four looks pained at his words. He bites down on his cheek and looks away.
"Yes. It was great. But I think it's time for me to go sit down now." Everly answers, and she shakes her head. "Eric, seriously, let go."
I don't let go.
"I can walk her to the nurse," Karl offers up. He looks at me like I should find him helpful, and I refrain from rolling my eyes. Strangely, Everly is on the same page as I am. She shakes her head no, and she works to undo my hands from her.
"I'm good," Everly answers, and she leans back into me. "Eric, let's just go."
I suddenly wonder if maybe she is hurt. Maybe he cracked her rib. There could be internal damage, and wouldn't that just be great?
"Maybe you should see the nurse." I think out loud, wondering if Arlene is there. She could always see her immediately, and we wouldn't have to wait long. I could demand we be seen right then and there, and she'd listen. I'd make her.
"Don't make me go to the infirmary. Please, can we just go? I just need some ice or something," Everly asks in a pleading tone, she swallows. "Eric, not there. I don't need to go to the infirmary."
Karl looks confused at her reluctance, but he must not have met Arlene yet. Four sighs, realizing his only solution is to give up on life, so he walks away to his class. His shoulders are slumped, and he slowly instructs a few boys that they're up next.
"Please," Everly asks softly. I'm still holding onto her, and I watch as Four's class lines up, not thrilled at being asked to finish their session. Four finally walks over to the kid who fell, halfheartedly pulling him up and making sure he's alive. Everly turns slightly and puts her hands on my jacket. She pulls me close to her and looks directly at me. "Please. I'll let you look at it upstairs."
She stares up at me, green eyes on mine, and something passes between us.
I give in.
"Fine." I snap. "But if anything is broken, I'm taking you to the nurse."
She nods.
"I'll see you around." Karl announces, realizing he's not walking away with her any time soon. He returns to his class, and only then do I finally let go of Everly.
Fifteen long minutes later, we're standing in my kitchen, her tank top shoved up high enough to expose her ribs, while I look over her side. Sure enough, she'd landed on the edge of his boot, leaving her ribs scratched up and bloodied. It's nothing life threatening; she'll have a bruise for sure, but she'll be fine. Uncomfortable, but fine.
"Hold still."
Everly bites her lip as I press the bag of ice against her ribs, and she does her best not to move. My thumb grazes her side, the action unconscious.
"It'll be sore for a few days. But nothing's broken," I tell her, and she wiggles away from the cold. "Everly, I said hold still."
I frown at her, and she frowns back at me. Both of my hands are on her; one on her side, holding the ice in place, and the other on her hip, trying to keep her still. She looks pained, and I feel a speck of sympathy for her. Had Four had some control over his class, this wouldn't have happened.
"Keep this on for a few minutes, then go take a shower. I'll start dinner." I announce, standing up.
"Did they fix mine yet?" She looks up at me curiously, and I smirk at her before I walk away.
It'll be turned back on.
Eventually.
She lies with her back against my chest.
She'd climbed into bed with me, her side still sore and her hair still damp from her shower. It hadn't taken long for her to inch her way close to me, until she was right in front of me. Once there, she sighed, and leaned back, as though she'd sought me out for comfort.
I let her.
I use her position to my advantage, touching her side lazily. I let my fingers slide over each of her ribs, slowly, avoiding the darkening bruise. My action is purposeful; I like touching her and judging by the way she pushes into my touch, so does she.
"Does Max care that you filled out my papers for me?" She breaks the silence with her question, and it's hard for me not to laugh.
My fingers still, smirking at the idea of Max telling her she'd been accepted. He'd told me, of course. I'm sure he thought he'd caught her off guard, but she'd played it off well.
"No."
She stretches, pushing herself into my hand. "He doesn't care that we haven't even finished the training yet? That I could wind up not passing?"
I stiffen at her words, hating that the thought is still in her mind. I assumed I'd drilled it into her that she'd pass, no matter what. I wouldn't let her be factionless. Ever. But there it was again, this fear popping up every now and then.
Ruining this.
"Failure is not an option, Everly," I hiss. "And no, he doesn't care. It's my class, and I'll pick whoever I deem fit for it." I resume my exploration, only this time, I trace up higher, writing an invisible claim all over her skin.
"And you picked me? Just me?" She scoots back further, until her shoulders bump into my chest. "Is there anyone else in the class?"
Her question catches me off guard. I'm too distracted by the feeling of her bare skin to think straight.
"No. From what I've seen, there isn't anyone else good enough." I pause when she goes silent.
"You know I don't want them to fail, right?" I dig my fingers into her skin, curling them in. She's far thinner than when she arrived here, far thinner than Ashley, but she's healthy looking now. She looks strong, and I think of her in my program, of her with me. She's earned it and no one else here has.
"We want the best here. We need them to come out of this training ready to fight. Four is too gentle with them."
I slide my fingers back down her side, venturing further than before. She has a pair of pajama shorts on, if you could call them that. They are short and flimsy, folded down and shoved out of the way. I like how it looks, the hint of her underwear peeking above the waistband, so I trace her hipbone, letting my fingers curl around it. I hold onto her, awaiting her response. When I get none, I squeeze lightly.
"Oh." She blurts out the word, and it only spurs me on.
"I'm not good with being gentle." I inform her, beginning the slow, drawn out preparation for what will happen when I do sleep with her. Because it's going to happen. She can't possibly think she's going to keep winding up in my bed, just so she can sleep at night. Not after the kitchen. Not after kissing her. Not after lying here, with me, like this is where she belongs.
"I suppose I could try." My grip tightens on her.
"Eric!" She says my name lightly, halfway giggling and gasping. I like how it sounds, but I let go of her, returning to the dark bruise. I skim over, my fingers barely touching it, and she sighs.
"Should I have another option? In case I'm not cut out for leadership?" She asks quietly, and it becomes clear to me, she's got a lot running through her mind. "Maybe, like, I don't know…" She trails off, sounding slightly defeated now. "I don't know what else I'd pick, actually."
"Like patrolling the fences? Working in the control room? You'd be bored out of your skull." I try to picture her out there, walking back and forth for hours, eventually returning to the compound to crash for the night. The picture is unappealing, even more so than her sitting beside Four and staring blankly at computer screens.
I hate the idea. The more I think of it, the more I despise it. She sighs, and I slide one of my legs between hers, moving until she's completely against me, covered by me. "You'll be better off doing the leadership program."
She seems to perk up. Maybe it's the close contact or maybe it's the reassurance. Either way, she tilts her head back, getting comfortable.
"I see you also put down that I don't need to be assigned an apartment." She sounds much happier as she brings up that little point, one I'd taken great joy in selecting. She probably didn't see it that way, but I was being practical.
"You don't. I'm not helping you move all your shit just so you can still come sleep here," I roll my eyes even though she can't see me. "Leadership training is a little more intense than initiation. It'll be easier if we can work on it without me having to hunt you down. You can just stay here with…" I stop myself from saying me, the admission choking in my throat.
I'd already come to the humiliating conclusion that I liked her here, but it was more than that.
I liked her.
Really liked her.
It went beyond wanting to prove I was a better trainer than Four. It went beyond wanting to sleep with her. It was something else I didn't understand at all.
"Good, because I don't want to have to walk all the way back here just to eat dinner with you every night." She answers flippantly, as though she's got me all figured out.
I snort.
She's hilarious if she thinks I need her to come back and eat dinner with me.
I remove my hand from her side and fling my arm over her. I shift on my side, until she's trapped against me. "Go to sleep, Amity. We can sleep in tomorrow."
She listens. She closes her eyes, and her breathing slows down immediately.
It doesn't take her long to drift off.
It doesn't take me long either.