Chapter Ten

The Marauders

The next morning at breakfast, no one except his friends knew why Sirius couldn't quite meet Lily's eyes. Uncharacteristically, he was almost glad when post came, as it served as a distraction, almost, from Lily, who he'd called such a horrible name, sitting across from him.

He was expecting nothing, of course. In fact, he was praying for nothing. Ever since he'd gotten himself two Howlers in September, he'd learned well enough to hope with every ounce of him that no letter landed on his plate.

"I got a letter," said James happily, ripping it open. He read it aloud to his friends.

"Dear James," he read. "Hope you're having a wonderful time at Hogwarts. Just wanted to let you know that you don't have to come home for Christmas break if you don't want to. Hogwarts can get wonderful this time of year. It's your choice. Please write to us telling your decision by at most, the day before your break begins. Love always, Mum and Dad." He beamed.

"Well?" asked Remus. "What're you going to do?"

James looked thoughtful. "I really don't know yet," he mused. "I have till tomorrow."

Sirius groaned.

"What?" asked Remus, as he, James, and Peter turned to look at their friend.

"I got a letter," Sirius answered darkly, watching his family owl fly off as if he wished murder on him. He probably did.

"At least it's not a Howler this time," pointed out James.

"Yeah, I guess," sighed Sirius. "I doubt it'll contain Christmas greetings, though.." He tore it open and read it.

James hoped with all his might that Sirius's mother had a brain lapse, or something, and realized her deep love and affection for her eldest son and heir.

Sirius sighed deeply.

"Glad my mum cares for me so much," he said quietly, drumming his fingers on the table.

So much for that idea, thought James glumly.

"Here, you guys can read it.." Sirius pushed the letter towards them. They leaned over it.

To Sirius:(the letter went.)

We hope you do not plan on returning to 12 Grimmauld Place over your winter holidays. You are certainly not welcome here. The same goes for Easter break, and any other break you may have, excepting summer. Unfortunately, we will have to take you then.

-Your mother and father.

(PostScript: Regulus would like to add a wish that you have a merry Christmas.)

James couldn't help but wonder, for the hundredth time, how anyone could treat their own son like Sirius was routinely treated. He looked up at Sirius, not quite sure what to say.

"Well," sighed Sirius, "I didn't except much else, I s'pose.. I just thought.. maybe.." He sighed again. "I guess I'm lucky she didn't tell me via Howler."

James was scribbling on a piece of parchment.

"What are you writing?" demanded Sirius, slightly annoyed.

James finished the letter with a flourish and showed it to his friends.

Dear Mum and Dad, (the letter went)

Sorry, but I've decided to stay at Hogwarts this break. My friends need me here. Love you heaps and all that!

Merry Christmas,

-James

Sirius looked up, more than a bit touched. "You don't have to.." he muttered. "I'll be fine on my own.."

James shrugged. "I don't mind, Sirius, I've always wanted to see what it'd be like here at Christmas." He grinned.

"Well," said Remus, in a concluding sort of tone, "that settles it, I'll be staying too."

All eyes went to Peter. He was wringing his hands gently, looking quite worried.

"How 'bout you, Pete?" said James easily.

"I'm..I'm.." Peter took a deep breath. "Ireallywannagohome," he mumbled quickly. He flushed. "I..I really miss.. my Mum and Dad.."

"That's all right," said Sirius, Remus, and James in unison.

Relief was apparent on Peter's face. He jumped from the table. "We'd better get to class, then," he said, and hurried off.

"Run home to Mummy and Daddy," muttered Sirius. Remus and James looked at him, surprised.

Sirius shrugged. "Have you ever got the feeling that something about Peter is..I dunno..off?"

Remus and James exchanged glances. "Look, Sirius, the guy misses his family.." began Remus.

Sirius shook his head. "It's not just that," he muttered. "I dunno, it seems..Meda says...y'know what, just forget it, aright? Speaking of Meda," he added significantly, an evil gleam in his eye, "I haven't forgotten what she said..we haven't played a single prank yet..and I want a massive one before everyone goes home for Christmas break!" He glanced at Remus. "Uh, you're not gonna disappear anymore..?"

"Uh, no," Remus said quickly.

"Awesome," said Sirius happily. "All right, then, prank. I have this great idea about graffiti and the Potions room.."

"What?"

"Meet tonight in my dorm," was all Sirius said. "Better get to class..." He darted off.

Remus and James looked at each other.

"He doesn't remember that we share a dorm, does he?"'

"I don't think so.."

XxX

"Are we all here?" asked Sirius furtively that night. "Great, great.."

"Sirius, we're always here," reminded Remus. "We share a dorm. Remember?"

"Whatever," said Sirius dismissively. "Anyways. Getting to the point. Who here actually likes Slughorn?"

"I do," said Peter timidly.

Everyone glared at him.

"You are so wrong, Pete," said Sirius menacingly. "So wrong!"

"I..don't," he said quickly.

"Good," said Sirius happily. "I hate him, he's always going on about how wonderful my cousin and my cousin and my other cousin and my great grandfather twice removed is. And what a shame, that I was in Gryffindor, and oh lord, I hate him.."

"Evans likes him," volunteered James.

Sirius glared at him. James wasn't, however, as easily fazed as Peter. "Well, she does!"

"I hate Evans, then," sad Sirius dismissively. James punched him.

"Defendant much?" groaned Sirius, clutching his shoulder. "And yet you still say you don't fancy her.."

"No, I am," said James sternly. "I mean, yes, I'm not. I mean, I am, but I'm not – oh, I am not defendant of her!"

Sirius and Remus (but not Peter, who was confused) exploded in laughter.

"ANYWAYS," yelled James. "I hate Slughorn."

"Me, too," muttered Remus, but he didn't say why. While the class was learning about various potions that tamed wild creatures, Slughorn rather snidely put in how there was no such potion for the werewolves, and werewolves were horrible creatures that were better put to death then be allowed to remain alive and "contaminate" other innocent humans. Remus considered this unnecessary, especially as he knew he was teaching a werewolf at that present point in time.

But they didn't have to know that.

"Yes," said Peter timidly. "Hate him. Yeah. Hate him. Hate him loads. I hate him so much – "

"We get it, Pete," said Sirius, somewhat irately. Peter flushed purple. "Anyway, once Meda brought home this Muggle thing called a move-e. It's basically like watching moving pictures move and interact in a storyline. It was called Gangstas with Graffiti –"

Remus and James exploded with laughter. "What a creative title," gasped Remus. "Gangstas.. oh, God, that's hilarious.."

"And it turns out," Sirius went on, ignoring his friends, "that there's this thing called graffiti, where basically you spray big puffy letters with spray paint on random walls to bug policemen. And since we all hate ole Sluggy, I thought we could bug him!'"

"By spraying big puffy letters on his walls with spray paint?" said Remus faintly.

Sirius waved his hand. "No, silly!"

Remus breathed a sigh of relief.

"We're gonna use magic paint!"

Remus banged his head on the wall. "Why? WHY? Why am I cursed with friends who are so clearly deranged?" he screamed.

James patted his shoulder. "Not cursed, Remmy," he said consolingly. "Blessed."

XxX

The next morning, Remus had finally been convinced to go along with their scheme, and Peter had finally figured out exactly what was going on.

Well, not exactly.

He'd gotten the gist of it. That was, in truth, more than James and Sirius actually hoped for.

The boys sneaked down to the Potions dungeon extremely early. Since all four of them had Potions first, this was not unheard of.

"Hello, boys!"

They all jumped. Only Sirius remained cool. They had a plan, after all, and he was armed with years of experience. "Hello, Professor," he said evenly.

"Sirius, m'boy!" boomed Slughorn. "You know, I wanted to invite you to a Christmas party I was having..very exclusive, just the Slug Club and you can bring..one guest..within reason.." Remus flinched as Slughorn's eyes swept his patched robes. "Your wonderful cousins will be there, lovely Bellatrix and darling Narcissa..not Andromeda, though, she's a bit of a downer..I've said it before and I'll say it again, boy, such a shame you weren't in Slytherin.."

James saw Sirius put his hand in his pocket and tighten his fingers. James gave him a warning poke. Sirius relaxed his fist slightly, but James could see he was still holding his wand. He nudged Remus. It was time for the distraction they'd planned.

"Um, Professor Slughorn?" Remus stumbled slightly over his words, but remained composed enough.

"And your grandfather, oh, lovely chap, Mr. Phineas – er, yes, Mr., er.."

"Lupin, Professor. Er, I remember you telling me that you knew, uh, To – Tompas – Rop – "

"Ropple Tommerspos," James hissed in Remus's ear.

"Ropple Tommerpos, and, for, for Defense Against the Dark Arts I'm doing a, a report on him – "

James wondered how Remus could be so cool and composed and polite around other teachers, even the scary ones, and be completely clumsy and stumbling and stupid around Slughorn.

"Yes, and I wanted to know how he was when you were teaching him.." Remus finished.

"I've got a file on him in my office!" boomed Slughorn. "I'll go get it..just be a moment.."

As he hurried out of the room, the four boys slapped twenty.

"He won't be back for hours," said Sirius delightedly. "You know how he gets. He'll see one old file and he'll take twenty five hours reminiscing...and if it's one of my family, all the better for us..what does he see in them, I haven't the slightest idea.."

"Let's get to work!" exclaimed James. He rubbed his wand experimentally, pointed it towards the wall, and began to say "Paintus Perma–"

"Hold it!" exclaimed Remus, thrusting out an arm. "We are overlooking one very important detail. Slughorn will know that it was us doing it because we were the last people in his office!"

"Slughorn loves me," said Sirius confidently. "He'd never accuse me of anything. But, if you're really worried, I can get Meda to head him off in someway, make up a fake story about how she's looking for us but she last saw us fast asleep in our dormitory.."

"Isn't Andromeda normally pretty busy?" said James dubiously.

"Yeah, but the girl loves pranks," said Sirius dismissively. "And lessons don't start for.." He checked his watch. "An hour and a half."

"You don't know where she is," pointed out Peter.

"The library," Sirius said automatically. "It's a rather annoying habit of her's, waking up at six thirty and going down to read. I'll be back in a few minutes. You guys start, though. And if Slughorn comes, just say invisicoursos tpoal SLUGHORN and sweep your wand over yourselves."

"What?"

"Just do it," Sirius said, and ran off.

James, Remus, and Peter exchanged careful looks. "I'll start," said James bravely. He raised his wand. "Paintus Permanentusi," he muttered, and the top of the wand turned bright green.

"Slughorn.." began James, concentrating hard and moving his wand on the wall just above Slughorn's desk. "..Is..a.." The words he dictated appeared carefully on the wall, in puffy green writing. It looked remarkably like side-of-the-road graffiti. "..Slimy.."

"James, you can't write that!"

"Yes, I can too, Remus," said James smugly. "..Git. There!" He beamed. "It lookswonderful. You next!"

Remus swallowed. "O..okay," he agreed, wondering inwardly if something was seriously wrong with him. He stepped towards the blackboard.

"What should I write?" he wondered aloud.

"How about something dissing the Slytherins?" James suggested.

"All right," Remus reluctantly agreed. "Slytherins..are...slimy," he began slowly, and the words began to etch themselves upon the wall. "G..r..y..f...f..i..n..d..o..r...s... are.. better." He smiled.

"Doesn't it feel good to get back at ole Sluggy?" exclaimed James, clopping his friend on the back.

For the next five minutes, the two took turns writing hateful message to Slughorn and Slytherins in general. Peter, predictably, was too scared to at first, but he joined in in the end, and wrote some clever remark.

Suddenly, the door began to creak open.

"Hurry, hurry," whispered Remus frantically. "What was it.."

"Invisicoursos tpoal SLUGHORN," recited James quickly, sweeping his wand over himself, Peter, and Remus. Nothing seemed to have happened. The friends looked at each other desperately.

" – Yes, Andromeda, just a moment," said Slughorn impatiently, coming into the room. "Those boys..where are they..?"

Andromeda came into the room. To their shock, Sirius was right behind her. Slughorn did not seem to notice him anymore then he noticed the graffiti on the wall – in other words, not at all.

"I'm serious, Professor, they were just in the library," Andromeda was insisting. "I was just .. looking for them.. – "

"Now, now, Drom, wait just a moment!" said Slughorn heartily. Andromeda grimaced behind his back. She obviously did not like being called Drom.

"Boys? Boys? Remus? I have the file.." Slughorn looked around. He looked directly at the graffiti and directly at the boys. They held their breath.

"..Well, I suppose you're right, Drom.."

"Yes, Professor, they were in the library," Andromeda assured him. "You know how eleven year olds can be, Professor, attention spans the size of ants."
"Better get back to my office," sighed Slughorn. "Lessons don't start for an hour, do they?" He yawned and left.

"It's clear, guys," Andromeda said, lips twitching.

"Awesome," said Sirius. "Finite incantatem!"

Nothing seemed to happen.

"That spell," Sirius began before his friends could, "blocks you and whatever you need to – from the vision of only the person whose name was stated."

Remus looked startled. "Is that you talking, Sirius? Where did you learn it?"

Sirius grinned and poked Andromeda. "Oh, a girl named..Drom."

Andromeda swatted him. "Do not call me that," she warned. "Or else you will be getting no visits from me over the summer."

"..Andromeda?"

"Yes, my dear cousin?"

"You do know if you don't visit me at least twenty times over the summer, I'll kill you?"

Amusement plagued Andromeda's eyes. "And if I told you that I plan to spend the entire summer with Ted, abroad in France, what would your answer be?"

"My answer would be this. You. Are. Dead."

"Well, I'd better start building my coffin." Sirius's face fell. "I'm kidding – kidding!" She looked around the room and burst into laughter.

"You guys," she gasped, "covered the Potions room..with...graffiti?"

"Shush," Sirius ordered. She petered off into little giggles.

"It's definitely one of your more inventive pranks.."

"Hang on, I haven't done my part yet," replied Sirius. "Although you guys did brilliance," he added. "Hang on, though.."

He picked up his wand, recited the charm, and began to thoroughly spoil the walls of the Potions room. He wrote all kinds of things, from obviously rude words in German ("His mother made him take it one summer," explained Andromeda to a baffled Remus, James, and Peter) to exactly what he thought about Slughorn (it wasn't exactly very nice) to absolutely random sayings to, in a flourishing finish, big green polka dots surrounding the room.

"It's fabulous," breathed James, as if surveying a great work of art. Well, in his eyes, he was. "It's amazing..."

He began to wring Andromeda's hand. "You taught him this," he breathed. "You are a master. A master. Teach me your secrets! TEACH ME YOUR SECRETS, I BEG OF YOU!"

Andromeda burst into laughter. "You choose your friends very well," she told Sirius.

"We better scram before Slughorn realizes that none of you idiots would come close to the library," Remus said, an impish grin dancing around his lips. Andromeda laughed loudly.

"You choose your friends very well, Sirius," she repeated.

"We need to sign it somehow," said Sirius absently.

"With our names?" said Remus faintly. He looked terrified at the prospect.

"No, you idiot," said Sirius dismissively. "We need a title, the four of us..some title..like the Awesomes.."

"No, Sirius, we are not calling ourselves the Awesomes," said James warningly. "Why not?" whined Sirius.

"Because. We need a really brilliant name. Like..the Mischievous Four."

"I like that," said Remus absently, "but it's kinda cliche.."

"How about the Marauders?" said Peter in a tiny voice.

Everyone looked at him. He paled. "N-never mind.."

"Nooo, I love it!" cried James.

"It's awesome!"

"Totally, Peter."

"Where'd you hear it?" demanded Remus, looking enthralled.

"McGonagall said it this one time," mumbled Peter, flushing pink.

"I LOVE it," said Sirius happily. He pointed to the ceiling and wrote, in much neater, smaller writing:

LOVE FROM THE MARAUDERS.

"Love from?" repeated James.

"Yes," said Sirius happily.

Remus's eyes were wandering the graffitied walls. He marveled inwardly at it, and also wondered slightly if he'd lost his mind. His heart leaped when he saw the word WEREWOLF. He rescanned the wall, looking for it..

there it was, in medium sized letters:

WEREWOLVEZ R KEWL!

Yes, he'd definitely lost his mind.

But it was in a good place.

XxX

That morning at breakfast, Slughorn came racing in, hat askew, looking thoroughly infuriated.

"VANDALIZED!" he yelled. "THE POTIONS ROOM! GRAFFITIED!"

The newly christened Marauders fixed their eyes on their respective breakfasts – Peter, lumpy porridge, Sirius, french toast, Remus, plain toast, James, eggs and bacon – and insanely willed themselves not to laugh. Across the hall, Ted Tonks tried hard to figure out why his girlfriend was in wild hysterics.

Slughorn reached Dumbledore in two strides. "DUMBLEDORE, THE POTIONS ROOM IS VANDALIZED! THERE IS PAINT ALL OVER IT! INSULTING ME! AND PUREBLOODS! AND IT IS SIGNED LOVE FROM THE MARAUDERS!" he shrieked.

Dumbledore's lips twitched. His eyes twinkled and seemed to glance briefly Remus, James, Peter, and Sirius (who promptly pulled on mostly convincing 'who-us-never!' looks) before snapping back to Slughorn.

"There, there, Horace," he said soothingly. "Paint? I'm sure it'll wash out. Why, Professor McGonagall has a handy little spell..Minerva, if you would.."

"WHO ARE THE MARAUDERS?" Slughorn positively screamed. "I WANT TO SEE SOME PUNISHMENT!"

"I daresay the Marauders are a handful of bored students, and I'd guess they do not want to be found," said McGonagall crisply. A hint of amusement seemed to be in her tone of voice, not that she was amused, oh no, Minerva McGonagall would never take amusement in the pain of her fellow staff members. "But we will try to track them down.. and Horace, come on, let's get to removing that paint."

The four slapped five.

"We did it," said James.

"We successfully pulled off our first prank," said Remus, sounding and feeling strangely pleased.

"Of course, they'll be more!" insisted James.

"Course," agreed Remus, wondering slightly in ninjas had captured his brain..then deciding he didn't care.

"We're awesome," proclaimed Sirius.

And they all agreed.

A/N: Oh, dear, has it really been two months? I'm sorry, I've been swamped. I have, however, written up to chapter thirty eight in this story, so you might be able to expect some stuff up sooner than later. :P Review! Pretty Please?