A/N: Hey hey hey! Sorry if this took long I actually went back to my aunt's house and it was a big mess but never mind that I'm at home and here to stay so updates soon!
Oh and the beginning is a gift to you guys who keep reviewing thank you so much. It's just some lame lemon but it came from the heart...?
Remus watched out of the corner of his eye as Sirius continued to lick the frozen Popsicle with that languid tongue of his. He didn't bother to deny it made him hard after he had been watching for nearly 10 minutes but he coughed slightly uncomfortable with the sudden tightness in his jeans. Sirius noticed the movement and turned to his fellow Marauder.
"Alright there Moony?" He teased his grey eyes sparkling in amusement. Remus looked beyond that and could see the smallest hint of desire in those eyes.
"Been better." Was his short reply. Sirius offered him a small apologetic smile as if he was the one who caused his problem and he was. But Remus wasn't about to admit that instead his mind wandered to today's advice column.
He wasn't very good on advice in his opinion he just had more common sense than Sirius. Speaking of whom was currently sucking on his ice cream like it was no one's business. The wolf in Remus seemingly howled as Sirius gave a good suck that made an obscene sound and Remus finally had to break.
With a flood of desire he pounced on Sirius and together they flew out of the chairs and onto the floor. It was bad enough he was stuck here in a room with hardly any air conditioning and now he had to put up with horniness just because the Narrator had left a box of Popsicles here.
"Moony!" Sirius's shocked voice exclaimed not quite matching the lustful gaze he gave that was driving Remus up the wall. No one could make him get like this no one except for Sirius.
"You think you could suck on whatever you want and not pay the consequences!" Remus growled licking the boy's ear giving it a good suck. Sirius moaned not bothering to answer as his hand slipped down to rub the werewolf's erection.
"You think you—oh Gods…" Remus shut his eyes as Sirius's expert hand toyed with his erection a quiet moan slipped out of him as Sirius ground up into him equally hard.
After a moment Sirius grew impatient and sat up only to pin the smaller boy down and rip of his clothes quickly. Remus helped Sirius move along faster and soon they were naked and panting.
"Don't take too long…" Remus ordered as he parted his legs giving Sirius the view he wanted.
Sirius nodded and delved a finger inside Remus's hole surprised to find that Remus hardly needed any preparation. How long had they been doing this?
Sirius couldn't remember he was cut off from his thoughts as Remus shoved his body against the finger making it clear he was more than ready.
"Okay okay I get it." Sirius chuckled removing his finger and adjusting himself just outside of Remus's entrance. He met Remus's amber eyes filled with pure animalistic need and smiled.
"Any last words?" Remus groaned closing his eyes before opening them to stare hard at him.
"Fuck me hard." He said seriously (pun intended). And without another word Sirius thrust in with a gasp.
Konichiwa welcome to another Moony and Padfoot's Advice Column
Question 42 comes fromimSiriuslyLupin4you
YAY! I get a 'Remus Lupin's Loopy Fangirls Club subscription'! I love you Both the same now! ^.^ (Take that Elliot...)
Padfoot- I spy a rivalry!
Moony- Now now we love you all the same.
Padfoot- I bet 100 bucks on imSiriuslyLupin4you!
Moony- …I bet on Elliot!
Padfoot- Bring it on werewolf!
-_-Oh that's real mature…
Question 43 comes from DragongirlM
PRONGS VS. BAMBI XD
Padfoot- Hmm I actually think Bambi can win this one.
Moony- No I'm pretty sure James is bigger than him.
What is this a betting pool now?*hands you Bambi on DVD*
Question 44 comes fromSo Fly like a 3-6
I'm glad you enjoyed my love. My question is are the two of you dating yet or you still denying it. Also someone should explain the double meaning of "time of month" to Padfoot
Moony-Uh no we aren't denying it anymore.
Padfoot- Yeah I am proud to homosexual where at least I know I'm free.
Isn't that a song about America?
Padfoot- Is it? *shrugs*
Moony- I also prefer not to go into the menstrual cycle with Sirius so instead I'll hand him this book *hands Sirius the woman body book*
Padfoot- *opens and begins reading*
Yeah and here you go *hands you a copy as well*
Question 45 comes fromDragongirlM
I want a subscription to Sirius Black's Siriusly Obsessed Fangirls Club! xD
Moony- okay here you go *hands you one*
Padfoot-*already on page 5*
Question 46 comes from elliot and sasuke
Elliot: Excuse me Padfoot, Severus is one of my favourite and Sirius before you get a hissy fit Moony is my no.1 favourite.
Padfoot-*Looks up from book* Good. I mean I should be your favorite since I'm
The Sirius Black but anyone that isn't Snape can be your favorite.
Moony-*smirks*
Padfoot- Don't you go getting a big head Moons.
Moony- Wouldn't dream of it Paddie.
And Sirius the duct tape didn't work instead I got a kick in the arse. T_T. It it would seem my mom doesn't like her being gagged either.
Padfoot- Ohhh…sorry?
You're terrible…
Padfoot- I know :D
And Sirius where is the pic? If I don't get it soon then i swear i'll *insert your imagination here*.
Padfoot- Don't worry I'm working on it.
Moony- =_-
Padfoot- ;D
Anyway bye bye. Love you Moony.(Yes I'm going to mention that every time I review)
Padfoot- Hmph *goes back to book
Moony- *blushes* Every time?
Padfoot- *growls*
Question 47 comes from WeaslyTwin3Some
Ok, first of all, I never got a present for my last question. How come everybody else gets a present but me?
*chuckles nervously* So you did notice that…heh heh
Padfoot- Bad Narrator!
Yeah that was bad of me *apology cake? :D*
Moony- Why are we always giving away cake—cake makes you fat.
Padfoot-*le gasp* Don't use such horrible words like fat and bloating!
Moony-I didn't even say bloating!
Padfoot- It's just a phase I'm not fat! *sobs and runs away*
Moony-…And they say I'm the bottom.
What is he on his period?
Moony- -_- Apparently…
And I was wondering, what instrument would you guys play in a marching band (color guard counts)? instruments say a lot about a person's personality.
Padfoot- *reluctantly came back* I don't play any instruments but if I did it'd be an electric guitar!
Moony- Of course it would be that.
Padfoot- Yes nothing is awesomer.
Moony- I would play a piano a good reason to put these long fingers to use.
Padfoot- I can think of a better reason.*deviant smile*
Moony- *smirks* To stretch you out?
Padfoot- No! To stretch you out!
Moony- I don't think so!
Padfoot- : ( *hands you a keyboard*
Wait wait you guys didn't read it properly (again) they meant which one would you play in a marching band!
Padfoot- Oops…well in that case I would play that loud drum you have to carry on your chest and you bang it on the sides?
Moony- I would play a trumpet.
Padfoot- Lame.
Moony- *smacks his arm* Your lame!
Padfoot- *whimpers*
Wow today is not your day!
Padfoot-*glares at her* Shut up!
:D
Question 48 comes from LadyMarauderYoung
Yayy! I got you to admit it - this is a proud moment...hang on while I compose myself. That's better. Padfoot: Coffee is not yummy. It's revolting. And let Moony gloat a bit!
Padfoot- I don't know what kind of coffee you've been exposed to but coffee is good especially when you taste it from someone's mouth.
TMI!
Moony- Stop saying things about our love life *blush* I mean…shut up!
And let me gloat!
Padfoot- NEVER! Mwhaha!
That story that I mentioned earlier about the Marauders...is it wrong that I dream about them (all of them except the one with no backbone *cough Wormtail cough*)?
Moony- You dream about us…? *slightly backing away*
Padfoot- *sings* Why you so obsessed with me girl I wanna know…
LOL! ^_^
Moony- You guys are so weird…
Naw we just had a bit of that sugary stuff made into straight rows beside that razor!
Moony- 0_o
*giggles* *hands you a bag of sugary stuff*
Moony-Stop that no crack *takes it away from you hands you a pack of Sugar Quills instead*
Question 49 comes from Andraste Straton
(Just a note) Yeah Gary's fit but I prefer Jason (as in Isaacs as in Lucius -swoon-)
Okay now that I'm fine again *(hands you a poster of Luscious Mouthful instead*
Padfoot- Hey I find that kind of offending!
Moony- Shut up you crack whore.
Padfoot- Mean Moony!
Moony- :D
Question 50(Oh MY Gawddd we made it to Half a century! Noes way! Ahhhh :D) comes from CANTLOGIN
Hi
Moony- Hello.
Padfoot- Hey hey hey!
To Moony/Remus/Lupin/Professor/Professor Lupin/First in Alphabet/Somebody Slap Me *SLAP* (Okay I'm good) and Padfoot/Sirius/Serious/Fugitive/Escaped from Azkaban/Harry's Godfather/Why can't I stop. . .
Padfoot- Prisoner?
Moony- *Wtf?*
Okay anyway Padfoot you do know you're dead right? You too, Moony?
Moony- WHA…?
Padfoot- I'm dead…?
Sirius died in the ministry and Remus was killed by a Death Eater.
Moony- A Death Eater?
Padfoot- I was in the ministry?
And don't say you came back as ghosts because I remember Dumbledore (or somebody else) saying that death was the next big adventure! That only people who were afraid of death could come back as ghosts! So, maybe you Moony.
Moony- I am not afraid of death!
Padfoot- Yeah he is not!
So my question is. . . . . How are you here doing this Fanfiction Column? Thanks!
Moony- I think you've just told us all about the future…
Padfoot- Moony…*whimpers* Let's run away to Neverland!
I guess I should answer this while these two sit there traumatized. Simple really—I stole a time turner went back in time found the puppies and asked them nicely…with a couple of bribes of course…
*hands you a bribe to keep you quiet about the stealing thing*
Question 51 comes from Rainbow Patrol
Gotta agree with LadyMarauderYoung about the coffee note...
Padfoot- What I like coffee is that such a bad thing!
Moony-*muttering to self* We're all gonna die we're all gonna die.
Padfoot- Moony?
Aside from the fact that my girlfriend's called Coffee and she's very yummy, but of course both you guys would forever disagree with me on that one!
Moony- *snaps out of trance* You got that right!
Padfoot- Moony *hugs him* I thought you went crazy! And yes that thought of a girl being yummy is disagreeable!
Anyways, for my question, you guys are switchers, right? I mean, it's quite obvious that you've got Padfoot wrapped around your fingers whenever you want him Moony...
Moony- It's true.
Padfoot- No it isn't I'm a grown ass man I can have sex when I want…if it's okay with you love
Haha whipped!
I bet you could pull off sex refusal for far longer than paddy if you actually tried XD hehee *hands Moony a list of other 'How To Torture Your Animagus Lover Into Cleaning His Act Up' options* *evil laugh*
Padfoot- Moony NOOO! *throws himself at him*
Moony- Oof let go you mutt!
Sorry Pads but I'm sure you deserve it at times! And Moony lemme know if sex refusing works as good for you as it does for me!
Moony- Will do ^_^
Padfoot- Evil Moony!
Question 52 comes fromT. XD
Lol.. i love your advice column, i think it's pure genius.. love you guys, all three of you!
Moony- Thank you!
Padfoot- Yes 68! And how many for you Moon Moons
Moony- 30 -_-
Padfoot- Yes I win!
Moony- *sighs in defeat*
On another note thank you I am the genius behind it of course!
Padfoot- -_-
What? You don't take me for one?
Padfoot- Hardly…
*scoffs*
Question: All my little brother and sister ever do is argue.. i'm quite close to either cruciatus-ing them or avada kedavra-ing myself.. what do you suggest?
Padfoot- Cruciate them I'd hate to see one of my fans go to jail.
Moony- *glares at Padfoot* No Pads, we don't suggest that? And why do so many people have sibling problems?
Padfoot- Because siblings are problems themselves.
Moony- That makes no sense…
Padfoot- You make no sense.
Moony- -_-?
Padfoot- ^_^
Moony- well anyways the advice we have for you is try to be the peacemaker and help them with their argument or distract them before they go at it
Padfoot- Or duct tape! :D
Moony- No Padfoot no more tape.
Padfoot- Awww : (
Xx
Moony-* blushes* *hands you a kiss back*
Padfoot- *winks* *hands you a kiss as well*
Question 53 comes from Viper's little Devil
here's one from an OC of mine
Moony- Okay.
Padfoot- Shoot!
Hi, I'm Nancy Black. I'm from the future and I am Sirius's daughter Now one question. DADDY WHY ARE YOU NOT IN MY LIFE?
Padfoot-Er…do I know you?
Moony- So…you had a daughter and abandoned her! Bad dog! *smacks Sirius's nose with a rolled up newspaper*
Padfoot- I'm sorry…honey? The reason is unknown to me as well since I don't even remember having you. Sympathy Doll? *hands you a Barbie*
Last Question comes from catman
Hey! i got cake! oh! yes, yes i digress, well, apparently this hurricane is suppose to only get worse before it hits my town, so before i evacuate and be without internet for a few days...(hoping for a few weeks!) i would like to ask is it natural for your pee-pee to touch your who-haw? I mean doesn't everyone have both? ...no...uh...-flees-
PS. if i don't survive (I will...the bill collectors won't let me be killed) my pre-dying wish would be for you two to do a hot homoerotic movie for me to watch in heaven...pwease?
Moony- I promise. And no that isn't natural unless you're a hermaphodite...
Padfoot- What Moony you actually promised that?
Moony- She might die it's the least we can do
Padfoot- Okay! :D
Well that was awkward…and make me a copy too! BYE!
catman I heard about Hurricane Irene and I'm actually worried please surrvive!