Bella's POV

"Please come in mom?" I told Esme. I walked over to my bed and took a seat.

"Well dear it seems that Alice wanted you to feel very comfortable in your new home. And I know that Jasper told you that no one was in the house but Carlisle and I are about to leave he just wanted to send an email to the hospital asking for his job back." She said as she looked around my new room.

"I am sorry that she took Edward's room from you. I know that you miss him mom. And I just wanted to let you know that I am no longer mad at him."

"And why is that dear? That is what I wanted to talk to you about anyways so why don't you start?"

"Well at first I was hurt, I felt rejected and I had never felt that before. I love him with everything I had. But most of all I felt rejected by the family. I could understand why he left but I thought that you guys loved me."

"Oh dear we did and we still do. Edward just made a good point in that he had moved several times when one of us wanted to so we felt that we owed him. But Jasper told me what he said to you and that is unforgivable. We never knew what he said to you."

I could see that she wanted to cry. That had to be one of the harder things about being a vampire. The want and need to cry but no tears would ever come.

"It is ok mom; at first I believe what he said that I was never good enough for him." I held up a finger to stop her from talking.

"What I mean is I felt like he was a god, but now that I look back on it he was the first real relationship that I had ever had. But after a few months I was able to see the light. I was never meant to be with him forever. He was just the start to my relationships and Jasper is the journey. I know that it is weird since Jasper and I have never spent a long time with each other but I know that we are meant to be together."

"Well Bella dear it sounds like you heart is trying to tell you something. Let me explain something to you. The man I was married to first, when I was a human, was a good man at the beginning and I knew that I loved him. But every time I was not with him I would always think back to that doctor that treated me what I was 16. There was just something about him. So I know how you are feeling."

So she had been in love before and then had met Carlisle and he was her soul mate. Well that made me feel better about Edward.

"Well sweetie, I just wanted to let you know that I am ok with you and Jasper being together and that I am not mad at you about Edward. We will deal with that if and when he ever decided to come back. But I will let you get ready for bed. What would you like for breakfast in the morning?"

"Um what do you know how to make?" I asked her knowing that they did not eat so what was the point in learning how to cook.

"Well then I will just surprise you in the morning. Good night sweetie." She said as she walked out of the room.

I sat there for a few minutes to go over what she had just told me. Could it really be that Jasper was my soul mate? Well I knew that I was truly in love with him and I knew that I could not live without him so I guess that it was true.

As I was sitting on my bed I heard another knock on my door. I knew who was standing outside it by the way my heart started to beat so fast.

"Come in Jasper." I said as he opened the door.

"I am sorry it took me so long to get back to you. I got the movie and then I talked to Carlisle. Are you ready to finish the movie, darlin'?" Boy was I ever.

Jasper walked over to my T.V and put the movie in. As it started he came and sat down next to me on the bed.

About half way through the movie I decided to take the first move. I could not believe that he was still just sitting there watching the movie. I sat up and looked at him. I slowly leaned in and planted my lips on his.

He then took over; his hands were on my back as he lifted me up to sit on his lap. I could feel his need for me. And I was right there with him. I was ready to go to the next level. Hell I was ready to go to the next level with Edward but he was not willing to go there. I felt guilty for just a few moments for thinking about Edward when I was with Jasper.

"Darlin' why are you feeling guilty? If you are not ready to do anything we will take it slow." He asked.

"No it is not that, I was just thinking about how at this point Edward would push me away." I said.

"Darlin', I have told you before I am not him, and I am willing to do whatever it takes to show you that. I love you and I would never do anything that will hurt you."

Great he did not want to hurt me and I knew that he would not want to have sex with me since it would hurt just a little.

"Sugar it is alright, I will do whatever you need and want." Well there you go.

I leaned in and began to kiss him again. He leaned me back on the bed so that my back was not resting on the bed and he was in between my legs. As he was kissing me I reached down to the hem of his shirt and took it off again. I could not get over how beautiful he was with his shirt off. I thought about what he would look like completely naked and my face turned a bright shade of red. I felt his fingers playing with the top of my sweat pants. It was now or never.

"Make love to me." I pleaded with him. And that was all it took. My pants were off in less than a heartbeat. I was laying there in my tank top and pink panties. Part of me was scared that I would not be good at this since this was my first time and I knew that he had been with a few women and he had been married to Alice for almost 80 years. But I put that thought out of my mind the minute I felt his cool finger play with the edge of my panties.

I was ready for this; I was so happy that I had waited for the one that I loved with all of my heart and body. The moment I felt the cold air on my girly parts I started to breath faster. I then felt a cold finger touch me. Oh god this felt so right and so good. I never wanted to stop, so the moment I felt him stop I opened my eyes to look at him.

"Um, darlin', are you feeling alright?" I did not understand the question I felt so right.

I sat up and looked down at his hand and the bed. It was then that I saw the blood. Oh my god. How could I forget that it was time for my monthly visitor? I felt so embarrassed that I shot up and ran to the bathroom and shut and locked the door.