I couldn't believe my courage. I kept my promise to myself, and I'd put Gerard in his place. I dare say that I'd done a damn good job. I was pleased. So pleased that I couldn't keep the grin off my face, even while laying there in my bunk where no one could see it.

But when I heard Gerard crying some time later, I didn't feel so great. I slowly rolled out of my bed and peeked round at Gerard. Or, at least, the crumpled mass I thought had to be Gerard. He was sitting in a ball and shaking the tiny, frequent sobs. I don't know what compelled me to go over there, but something in the back of my mind did. So I sat next to him, put and arm around him, and drew him closer to me. He smelled like coffee, which I enjoyed.

"Gee, baby, what's wrong?" I whispered in his ear.

The only answer I got was another wail.

"That bad, huh?" I said, mainly to myself.

Gerard looked at me with tear-filled eyes and the biggest smile I'd ever seen him wear broke through his frown. It stretched as far as a grin could go, bore all of his teeth, and make little creases in the corners of his eyes. With that smile in my mind, I was putty in his hands. As much as I hated to be, and much as my promise screamed itself over and over in my mind, I couldn't help myself. Love is love.

Gerard began to bring his mouth closer to mine, but I leaned back. "Woah, Gee. You're not thinking clearly. Look at you! You're still crying."

"I-" Gerard's breathing was so erratic and shallow that he had to breathe in awkward places, "d-don't-" another breath, "care!"

I decided to put my inhibitions on the backburner, and kissed Gerard's quivering lips. His tears made my face a little damp, but I didn't care. Gerard was, in a way, free. Yes, he was sad about it but he could be with me. And that's what I wanted. It was a little selfish, yeah, but I wanted him more than anything. And now that he was technically single, I could kiss him and all the rest of it without feeling guilty.

Gerard pushed me down into a laying position and nipped at my neck the way I loved. I curled my toes that soon, having not had any sex in the last little while. I was rusty, alright?

But then I thought. Gerard was crying. I should at least do some of the work. So I said, "Uh-uh. Relax. Let's make Frankie do some of the work, yeah?"

"'Kay," Gerard choked out.

I pushed him over, gently and had my way with his lips and his neck. We didn't notice until then that we weren't alone, for Ray had wandered back into the van. "This is like… consensual, right?"

I laughed. I was straddling Gerard and kissing him all over while there were tears streaming down his face. Of course the first thing that anyone would have thought was 'sexual harassment!'. "Yes, Ray, he wants it as much as I do, he's just upset."

I stood up, helping Gerard get up, too, and I swung his arm around my shoulder. Mikey, Bob and Brian all came in with knowing looks on their faces. Brian laughed uncomfortably and said, "Okay, so, here's the deal. We're gonna go get a hotel, you guys can do whatever in there, as long as we don't have to hear about it. And if you wait until we get there. Okay?"

I nodded vigorously and I looked up to see Gerard smile in appreciation. So I walked him over to my bunk where we sat, him holding me, and kissing little kisses on occasion. I was completely, utterly happy in that half-hour or so before we got to the hotel. It was some sort of tawdry, Holiday-Comfort-Super 8-Generic chain. I didn't pay attention to the name of the hotel, or how nice the lobby was or wasn't. I did pay attention to the bed in my room, though, and how eager I was to drag Gerard onto it.

And that's just what I did. I pulled Gerard on top of me and I eagerly engulfed his face with my kisses. His lips moved weakly along with mine, but he wasn't putting the energy that I was I was into it. So I decided to be decisive. I rolled myself on top of him and he smiled widely. I helped him shrug out of his jacket, and he put his arms around my waist, pulling me closer to him. He seemed perfectly content to just kiss, but I hadn't gotten laid in ages!

Seeing as how I was on top, I rubbed my thigh against the crotch of his jeans. I wasn't sure if I was making friction on the right stuff but with the way he was moaning, I think I was making some headway. He drew his knees up, enabling my leg more movement. "How about we just get right to it?" I suggested.

Gerard nodded. So, I flipped him over and he got on his hands and knees. I was already like a rock, so no preparation on my part was needed. But him on the other hand… shit! "Um, Gerard?"

"Uh-huh?"

"I don't have anything with me right now."

"Fuck!"

"Yeah. Want to come with me to the drug store to get some?"

Gerard stood up again, reluctantly, not bothering to put his jacket on. I had to rearrange myself in my jeans so that I wouldn't offend anybody, and I noticed Gerard doing the same. Ha.

We went to the in-hotel store, that thankfully sold the damn things, and we splurged on the variety pack. I had a feeling we were going to need them.

In the elevator, we couldn't control ourselves. I latched onto him like a parasite and he kissed me back just as urgently. We stumbled back to our hotel room, where I struggled with the key. Gerard wasn't making it any easier, because he was rubbing my hips under my shirt with cold hands, and he was biting my earlobe. "C'mon, Frankie!" he urged. "I want you!"

That did it. The door swung open and he kicked it shut. I shoved him back into position and we both pulled our jeans down just enough. I wrapped myself and dug my fingers into his hips for support. I rocked my hips back and forth, probably enjoying Gerard's sex noises more than the act itself.

When he tightened up, and I came, too, I collapsed onto his back in complete contentment. Nothing else could come between us. We were meant to be, I knew it.