A/N: Wow. It struck me while writing this that I started this story about four years ago. When I started this, I was a senior in high school, with a plan in my head that is very different now as a senior in college. A lot has changed in the storylines for both series, and a great number of my expectations have needed to be rewritten, but I'm still trying to incorporate all the new stuff without completely retconning what I've written.

This story has continued to surprise me over the years, and while I don't think that it necessarily is my "best" work, it has continued to be my most popular, and the one which people keep encouraging me to work on. And so, this is dedicated to all of you.

Furthermore, I'm going to apologize for some of the language I'm about to use. See more in the note at the bottom.

"Come out you whore!" Nnoitra stopped as the door to the store flew open. He had been impatiently swinging the massive axe-like weapon, annoyed at finding hide nor hair of the target he been sent to take. "There you are…" The Espada grinned as he laid eyes on the target. "Aren't you a lovely piece of work."

In spite of himself Nnoitra suddenly felt a moment of apprehension. He prided himself on having the most acute Pesquisa of all the Espada, and yet he had felt nothing at all moments before, but the instant that door had opened a number of reiatsu had washed over him. Fortunately, none seemed particularly strong.

"Hey there. I'm the Quinto Espada, Nnoitra Gilga. You're all coming with me!" He raised the large blade above his head effortlessly, spinning it for little reason other than to make a great show of it. "Especially you "Space Time Witch"." The arrancar spoke each of the last three words slowly, mockingly as he quickly snapped his weapon forward, pointing it directly at Yuuko.

"Oh, I don't think that they will be going anywhere they don't wish." The woman spoke coldly, lifting a weapon which he was surprised to see was as long as his own. The woman seemed to catch his glance, smirking slightly. "What, you have a length issue? Compensating for something?"

"Bitch!" Nnorita railed, sticking out his tounge and letting out a stream of golden light from his tounge, a cero crackling with power headed straight for the woman.

Yuuko stood steady without a hint of fear, watching calmly as the beam approached. As it reached the doorway the light of the cero bent, and then scattered, dispersing in the air around the door frame in a series of smaller beams.

"Really Gilga-san, I would expected more from one of your master's [i]Espada[/i] Yuuko slowly walked to the doorway, looking back at her openly gawking guests.

"She…she just stopped a cero as if it was nothing." Uyru gaped at the site. He had known that normal humans could develop powers, the Quincy were a prime example of that. But he had never seen a barrier which would have done anything like that.

Yuuko turned back to the inside of the house, the face of a cheerful host appearing once more. "Well, that's kind of you to say. Alright, it's time for some of you to be paying off your debts~"

Ichigo immediately leapt through the doorway, Zangetsu ready in his hand raising the. "It's alright…I've got this. Ban…..kai!"

A black cloak should have billowed from around his shoulders, the massive kitchen knife of a sword replaced by a slim back nodachi.

Should have being the operative word.

"Eh?" Ichigo have his zanpakuto a confused look, nothing actually changing at all. "What's going on?"

"In order to keep your friend contained, I had to manipulate your reiatsu a bit." Yuuko smirked. "Don't worry, you have far more than an average shinigami. At least of that much as a lieutenant captain."

"Ehh…." Ichigo stammered. "You do know that those guys are at least as strong as a captain, right."

"Don't worry, you're going to have help." Yuuko stepped behind the companions inside the house. "I'll handle the Espada…you take on his lackey. And you'll have someone else to help you."

Chad and Orihime stepped up, each falling into their stances as Urahara had taught them.

"Oh no, not you two…it's time for someone else to pull their weight." Yuuko clapped a hand on Watanuki's back. The boy turned his head around slowly, a look of horror coming over it as he gradually realized what the witch had meant. With a sudden shove, Watanuki tumbled head over heels through the doorway.

"Oh for the sweet love of kami, don't put me out here!" He screamed, running back in the direction of the doorway. At the moment that he arrived, his face careemed off the invisible barrier, knocking him back flat on his ass. "What the hell?"

Yuuko leisurely strolled out of her house, the barrier giving a hint of a shimmer as she passed through it. "You've been far too leisurely lately, what with all the passing out you've been doing." Yuuko gave her employee her best cat-like smile. "Come on, a little bit of exercise will do you some good."

"Are you INSANE?" Watanuki hollered.

Yuuko gave a slight chuckle. "Maybe a little bit. But sometimes, the butterfly needs a little push to to get it out of the chrysalis."

"What the hell does that mean?" Watanuki cried out, the twisting fear in his gut causing tears to stream from his face.

"It means that sometimes, you need to give things a little push. Duck." Yuuko's eyes narrowed at the last word, swinging Fai's staff at Watanuki's head.

"AHHHHHHHHHHHH!" Watanuki let out a scream that would have made the proverbial little girl blush and ask "Do I really sound like that?" as he scrambled for cover, the 'clang' of metal meeting metal deafening in his ears.

"Fucking bitch." Nnorita spat, eyes widening at the sight of his massive blade stopped by the waif of a woman in front of him.

"I think that's enough foul language for now. If you really need to fight with me, we'll do it out of the eyes of these children. I don't want them to be victimized."

Nnorita opened his mouth to scream obscenities at the woman, but before he had the chance to loose them upon the assembled group, there was a slight shimmer around the pair, and they both disappeared.

"-uck that pretty little ass of your until you're screaming in agony!" Nnorita yelled, blinking as he adjusted to his new surroundings, a place that could only be described as…well, white. A white floor, with nothing around, as far as the eye could see, except for pure white.

"This wasteland will make sure that you don't harm anyone else." Yuuko spoke darkly, all hints of playfulness gone, her dark eyes narrowed into slits. "You actually could be a threat if you were allowed to fight in my store. At the very least, you could destroy something precious."

"You…DON'T YOU DARE MOCK ME!" Nnorita felt his rage grow. He hadn't been so angered by a woman since…since…

Since Neliel.

"I'll show you…" Nnorita's voice dropped. Somehow, the whisper was more terrifying than his shouts. His grip on his axe tightened as he raised it. "PRAY, SANTA TERESA!"

"Yuuko…Yuuko!" Watanuki called out, searching frantically for his vanished employer.

"Ichigo!" Orhime yelled, smashing her fists against the empty doorway, her hand stopping as they struck something hard. Puzzled, she tried again, a ripple in the light the only sign of any progress as Yuuko's barrier denied her exit. "We'll get out of here and help you, just hold on!"

"Nnorita-sama! Nnorita-sama!" Tesla called out, equally worried about the disappearance of his master. It wasn't terribly disconcerting to see someone to enter a portal, such as Garganta, but to have someone simply vanish was another matter entirely.

The arrancar's eyes fell on the two in front of him. He stood silently for a moment before bowing. "I apologize. I hold nothing against you, but I need to find Nnorita-sama. Therefore…" Tesla drew his sword, a long curved blade with a circle conspicuously in the middle. "I need to eliminate the two of you as quickly as possible. Crush, Wart!"

There was a flash of light as the arrancar transformed, discarded the human appearance to leave the hulking form of a bipedal warthog. Kimihiro's eyes widened, and began to cough as the overwhelming spiritual pressure brought him to his knees.

Tesla swung his fist at Ichigo, the massive limb colliding with Zangetsu as Ichigo entered a crouch, catching the blow his sword. Even then the attack pushed him back, the momentum sending him sliding across the ground. Ichigo launched himself forward again, bringing Zangetsu down in a vertical slash. Tesla brought up his arms, crossing them as the attack came, effortlessly blocking the attack between them.

"I'm sorry." The warthog rasped, the words muddled by the change in his mouth. "But an attack such as that will not break my hierro."

"Well…"Ichigo gasped, I'll just have to try harder then." The fight was proving surprisingly difficult, and he was finding himself far more winded than he would have been otherwise.

How much of my strength…was my hollow?

Ichigo gritted his teeth at the thought. "I'll show that horse who the king really is! Getsuga…" Ichigo raised Zangetsu, bringing it back slightly before slicing the huge blade through the air. "Tenshou!"

He realized something was wrong from the moment he fired, the strength leaving his limbs almost instantly. He fell to the ground, using Zangetsu to help keep himself upright. Firing off an Getsuga Tenshou always drained him…but not like this.

Tesla caught the attack on his arms again, but this time, was unable to fend it off. The attack sliced into his arms, leaving bloody gashes in his arms and the parts of his chest that he had been unable to protect.

"Not bad…I have to commend you for your effort. But, in the end, it is not enough." Tesla slowly advanced upon the downed Shinigami. "And it seems that your energy is spent. Truly, a pity." Tesla brought up his arm, readying it to bring down on Ichigo's immobilized frame.

Watanuki watched in horror throughout the fight, watching as Tesla moved into the kill.

"Another…another to be hurt while I do nothing."

Later on, he would wonder why he decided to move, why he would try to overcome the crushing spiritual pressure to try to save a complete stranger. He would ask Yuuko about what she thought, but was only rewarded with one of her trademark smiles and "It was Hitsuzen."

Watanuki, covering his mouth with one hand to steady his coughing, began running to Ichigo.

"Shouldn't you be worried about all those other people, Witch?" Nnorita asked, swinging his limbs back down in a frenzy, finding to his dismay that each and every attack was expertly parried.

"Don't worry…I'll have plenty of time to look after them. We are in a place of closed space. Time moves slower here." Yuuko raised her staff up over her head. "And I have a trick that an old friend showed me." Yuuko ran a hand over the edges of the staff, pricking her finger and spreading a dribble of blood along the edge.

"Scream." At that command, light danced across the edge of the staff, rolling like a wave toward the Espada, curving at her command. The magic neatly sliced through Nnorita's limbs, dropping the giant Praying Mantis to the ground.

Yuuko slowly walked over peering down at her frozen opponent.

"We could spend a decade here, by human reckoning, and hardly a minute will go by where they are. That's how long I have with you."

Nnorita, in spite of himself, grinned. "Do you really think that boy of yours will last a whole minute against Tesla? He's a normal human, not a whiff a reiatsu. He's nothing…Tesla will tear him to shreds."

"Ichigo, look out!" Watanuki leapt in front of the giant warthog monster, shutting his eyes. As he did so, he felt something…furry.

"I don't know why you bothered pushing him out there you bitch. Why, did you want him to die? Did he cheat on you?" Nnorita wagged his tongue.

Yuuko frowned, obviously not amused. "That boy is not "nothing". He is something I doubt you could comprehend. He is the dark reflection of the offspring of two of the most powerful sorcerors ever to exist. Perhaps he is the greatest thing I have brought into this world…a son."

Nnorita lay silent for a moment before breaking out into laughter. "A son? You the hell'd knock you up, you skank?"

With a dangerous flash in her eyes Yuuko drove the staff through the arrancar's chest, the cracks slowly working their way through Nnorita's body. "That boy's body knows he shouldn't exist…the dead should not bring life after all. But there are more like him…ones which have been known throughout history. Oracles. Sages. Magic. Divination. Fullbring…"

Nnorita began channeling his reiatsu, attempting to close up the cracks going through his body. However, the more he pushed, the faster they grew, the lines now covering all of his torso and the beginning of his legs.

"Oh yes, a nasty little spell that one. Clow invented it. A magical cancer he caused it, growing the more power it was given. Only to be used on the most worthy." Yuuko gave Nnorita a dangerous smile. "But where was is…right. Magicians. It was difficult, you know, watching a body designed for magical greatness flounder without a hint of its own. The poor boy doesn't even know why those spirits come around him. They are drawn to him, his body calling them to feed. Of course, he never would but, then again, after all he does for them he hardly has to."

"Wha…you…talki…'bout…unt?" Nnorita asked, his body almost completely consumed now.

"What I mean is that the time is finally right. All he needs to do to escape the chrysalis is to remember my lessons and he'll be transformed.' Yuuko smiled pleasantly. "Reborn. Like all of those lost souls you devoured. Farewell Nnorita Gilga. The world will be a better place for your passing."

Watanuki looked up from the table where he was seated, the busy clatter of the restaurant creating a general buzz.

"Are you ready yet?"

Watanuki's eyes were immediately drawn to the stunning redhead across from him, clothed is a luxurious green kimono, her eyes curiously still closed. "I'm…sorry?" Watanuki eventually managed to stammer. "There was this thing, and I was-" Watanuki thought for a moment, trying desperately to remember how he had gotten here. "The battle!" He yelled, leaping to his feet and sending the dishes clattering to the floor.

"Good, you remember." The woman stood, walking to the edge of a mountain. "You know that we don't have much time."

"Wait…weren't we in a restaurant a second ago?"

"Watanuki, did you really think that we are anywhere other than Yuuko's shop right now?" The woman asked, leaning in and whispering, her breath on his ear. "Now, you need to say it."

Watanuki blushed furiously. "Wha-what do you mean by that?"

The woman let out a giggle, her furry ears ("Wait, furry ears?" Watanuki wondered, not having time to process this particular fact.) "Come now, you need to hurry. Remember everything that Yuuko has taught you. You have to say. My. Name."

Watanuki looked at the woman, confused. "What is your name?"

The woman shrugged, the sleeves of her kimono riding up over her hands. "That's up to you. But my time is up."

Watanuki plunged back into darkness, memories racing through his head.

"By giving out your name, you are giving them the ability to take your soul."

"Names are very important. Names have power. It doesn't matter if it's living or not, once you give it a name, you embodied that person or object with the same amount of power."

The woman's voice returned again. "Words have power. Words can break bone. True names have the most power of all."

In a single moment, one moment of perfect crystalizing knowledge Wantanuki knew exactly who the woman was.

"I have your name: MUGETSU!"

The dust faded, Tesla's massive form standing in front of a terrified Watanuki. But between the two, there was someone new. The pipe fox spirit stood in front of the arrancar, transformed as it had been while facing the Spider Queen.

But as Watanuki looked on, he could tell that the pipe fox wasn't the same as before. Green panels of armor covered the fox's back and legs. The edges of the fox were more solid than before too, more of a solid entity than spirit. And, as the most striking change, there were flames licking at its legs and a pair of blades folded over its back.

"You're…Mugetsu." Watanuki whispered.

The Mugetsu nodded for a moment, its blades flaring out the side. Mugetsu leapt upon Tesla, the blades plunging into the arrancar's chest. The was a gust of flame, starting at the fox's legs and covering the giant warthog. Blinded, Tesla staggered back, moaning in agony.

"Great job holding him off." Ichigo stammered, bringing himself to his feet, having been given a moment to gather himself. Zangetsu glowed as Ichigo's reiatsu gathered. "I've got it from here. Getsuga Tenshou!"

The attack paused for a moment against Tesla's hierro. For a moment it seemed that the attack was ineffectual, staying in place. But then, in a sudden rush, the crescent shaped attack sliced through Tesla's hide, a great spurt of blood erupting as he the arrancar crumpled to the ground.

"Nnorita…sama" Tesla gasped, his body vanishing, cleansed by the Zanpakuto.

"Whew…" Relieved, Ichigo slumped, burying the point of Zangetsu into the earth, panting heavily. Wearily, he cast his glance back over at Watanuki, and at the strange fox…thing that was in front of them. "Now…what the hell is that thing?"

The fox look over at Ichigo, speaking in a distinctively feminine voice. "I am…Mugetsu."

I've used a character who is, in the actual story, a foul-mouthed chauvinist. It's kind of hard to portray the Nnorita otherwise. Why portray him at all then? Because seeing someone like him meet a woman who can kick his ass gives me a warm fuzzy and I found him one of my least favorite/interesting Espada, and yet SO MUCH TIME got spent on his backstory.

As for Yuuko's strength, it really is uncertain, but in one of the OVA's we see her brush off attacks as if they are nothing and has the ability to create beings that cross over through dimensions, as well as having an enormous collection of valuable magical items.

And so to you who naysay: "Thhhssssspppppp"