AN: Thank you as always goes out to SportsFan and Zoe for dealing with our endless panicking and constantly bringing us back down to earth. We really appreciate EVERYTHING they've done for us; this story wouldn't be what it is without you. We hope you know that. Thank you, thank you. Thank you Shinata-Riyoko for working hard on our very poor grammar and punctuation, you probably deserve an award for our over AND underuse of commas and apostrophes.
Thank you goes out to everybody that takes the time to read and review, it really helps us in tweaking out future chapters and making certain we aren't missing anything. You guys are pretty great, you should remember that.
We apologize for the lateness of this chapter, one of us lost her mojo but it seems to be back and we can pull together and really give you guys the best we have. We will be trying to get the next chapter up as soon as possible, we just have a few kinks to work out and it'll be out ASAP. Things are getting deep but there is a light at the end of the tunnel and possibly sooner rather than later. We love you!
Nic and Sadie. Sadie and Nic.
Chapter 10: Caught In The Chaos Of Life
I Become Afraid Of the Darkness In My Heart, Hurricane
"I want Gramma." Sofia started crying uncontrollably. "I want to go to Gramma's. I hate it here. I hate them both." Cristina watched as the small child threw herself onto her cushions in the corner of the sitting room that housed her toys. Crossing her arms, trying to show nothing but anger, except her small sad eyes became waterfalls the harder she tried.
"What happened? What did you hear, Sofia?" They were playing a game of hide-and-seek, this new shift in moods was unexpected and a complete surprise for Cristina, so it only could mean that Sofia had overheard something that she shouldn't have been aware of in the first place. Moving over to the small child, she kneeled in front of her, her own heart breaking at the state her goddaughter was in.
"Mommy." She sucked in a deep breath trying to stretch her lungs. "She ... she lied to me." Sofia collapsed into Cristina's arms, her world caving in around her. "Mommy said they divorced cuz they wanted different things, but they didn't. Mama kissed someone else. She didn't love us. She didn't want us." She cried so hard she was again gasping for oxygen.
Crap. Cristina shook her head. "Did you hear this from the hall?" She didn't know what to say to make it better and if Sofia was upset over lying, Cristina was not going to make it worse by continuing to do so. "Your mama loves you very much, Little Doc."
"Well, I don't love her. I want Gramma. I only love Gramma." She hung onto her aunt and cried. She didn't want to hear it, she just wanted her gramma to make it better.
"Thanks, Little Doc. I'm truly hurt." Cristina mocked a painful expression trying to bring Sofia out of her current distraught state.
"Don't tease me. It's not funny. I love you too but only you and Gramma." She wiped at her eyes giving her godmother a stern look.
"Okay. Okay. Look, you go get your stuff together, pack an overnight bag. Does Barbara … uh, your Gramma have a machine there for you with meds?" Cristina asked.
"Uhuh."
"Okay, go pack. I'll be right back to get you. We are going to have to take the stairs slow and easy for you. Can you go get a flashlight from where your mommy keeps them?" Cristina watched as Sofia nodded and then she waited until the small child was in her room before marching out of the apartment towards the elevator. Waiting outside, she could clearly hear the two women at each other's throats. Even if Sofia hadn't used her hearing aid to help her in eavesdropping, what they were saying, screaming, was clear as day.
We Drank Champagne And Danced All Night, Under Electric Candle Light
What had started off as calm, took on an uncontrollable hurricane of emotions. A life of its own. There was no other way but to scream and shout because they didn't hear each other any other way. They needed to feel each other and this was what was left; shattering revelations coming to light, emotions they needed to get of their chests.
"I've been thinking, have you ever properly loved me or have I always been a control issue for you? This time apart has made me see things clearly, I mean I've really thought about everything. You have always done what suited you. God, the only reason you even proposed to me was because you were trying to get my attention away from Mark. Trying to outdo Mark. You always were trying to outdo Mark, but newsflash Arizona, I chose you. Mark was never in the running."
"Oh, so he wasn't in the running when you'd screwed him as soon as my ass was in Africa or did you even wait for me to land, were you fucking him after I boarded the plane to Africa? Had I even taken off? I think you'll find he was sure on your radar then." Arizona scoffed as she managed to sneak that into the conversation finally after all this time. Which just made Callie raise her voice higher and the temperature in the small space increased again.
"YOU left me, broke up with me in a freaking airport because I got pissy for a few days. The fact was, I would have followed you there, followed you anywhere; I left MY life behind for YOU. Nobody ever was in the running because it was always just you, Arizona." Callie took a deep breath trying to sort her head because Arizona threw her off bringing up Africa. "I chose you! But that never mattered to you because you never cared to see it. You had to control everything and you proposed and then you almost killed us all. But I have never once thrown the car crash in your face Arizona, and it was your fault. Not fucking once." She wiped away the tears blinding her. "IT WAS YOUR FAULT!" She finished screaming.
"You didn't have your seatbelt on…" Arizona screamed back, her temper completely out of control with Callie's accusations. It was one thing that she had always blamed herself for it. She had always known that she hadn't watched the road as well as she should have been doing. She never forgot that, ever. But hearing it from Callie's mouth made it even more real and even more painful.
"And you weren't meant to be on the FRICKEN plane Arizona; you were pissed at Karev. You couldn't control Nick being terminal and my inability to fix him. You took out your anger on Alex. The guy that you had been building up all these years, you made him this great guy, your best friend, your savior, and yet you couldn't handle that you couldn't control what his decision would be. You couldn't control the fact that he was picking Hopkins, over you." She could barely breathe, pounding her fists against her thighs, tears streaming down her cheeks, her heart beating erratically as her temper flared and flared. "YOU WEREN'T SUPPOSED TO BE ON THE PLANE! You said that I wanted the glory of surviving the plane crash that I didn't lose anything. Well newsflash: I lost my wife and my best friend in those woods. I lost my whole damn family and we would have lost our damn hospital too, I was just trying to do right by everyone. I was the only one trying to do anything. Do you want me to remind you who's fault it was why the hospital's insurance was null and void ... cuz you weren't supposed to be on the plane!" Callie screamed so loud her voice cracked, her throat burning from the bile of truth. Sobbing herself into a coughing fit, Callie tipped her head back, closing her eyes, squeezing them tight until the storm passed over. Breathing deep, she counted to ten, opening her eyes again to see Arizona looking back over her with shock and the recognition of her words on her face. Taking another deep breath she lowered her voice to almost a whisper. "We got in this mess because we don't talk, Arizona. We never have properly been able to talk. Everything has always been skimmed over and I take my share of responsibility for that." Arizona said nothing as she waited for Callie to completely calm down. She couldn't say anything. How was it even possible? The things Callie said were true to point, and she couldn't argue with that.
"I have forgiven you for what you said that night, for the sake of our daughter. I saw the shock on your face at what came out, but there was also that split second of complete hatred for me all over your face. And I don't think I'll ever forget that look in your eyes, but even worse Arizona, you screwed her, you cheated on me; you tore apart our family for a few minutes of pleasure or whatever that was for you. I ... I just don't know if I could ever forgive that. I've never been given reason to anyway so it never mattered." Callie's temper softened when she got that off her chest, looking at Arizona, she realised that being stuck in the small space with her had already taken it's toll on her, and everything they were saying was only making things worse.
Arizona went to scoot further away from Callie, unable to be any closer to her, she just needed space. Callie's honesty, the truth behind her words burned Arizona with ultimate disgrace. When she grimaced from pain, Callie's heart broke. Sitting on the hard floor was uncomfortable for somebody with two working legs, add that to Arizona having walked all over with Sofia in the morning and not having taken much care of herself, Callie knew she was in sheer pain. She might have conflicting feelings for her ex-wife, but she had a heart still, and it still beat for Arizona.
"That's how we got here, why we're here at all. We don't speak to each other. I don't even know if we know how or if we ever did." Callie repeated feeling as though a weight had been lifted, finally saying everything that had been stirring in the pit of her stomach for years, and though it did not take away the pain, it at least eased some of the pressure. She deflated slightly like a bottle of fizzy pop, release the lid slightly letting out some of the gas stops it exploding. She was calm again because of it, and when Arizona's physical pain broke through her own tumultuous storm of emotional despair, she automatically clicked into old times.
"Hey, while you two are having world war three in there, do me a favor and don't kill each other. I don't want to have to explain to your daughter why her moms are dead." Cristina hollered through the metal doors. "And while you're at it, keep your damn voices down, the entire floor can hear you two bickering like fools." She was so angry that if she could, she'd give them a piece of her mind, but with Sofia just down the hall she was going to protect her goddaughter and not make matters worse. She knew they needed to get it out, clear the air, and it was partly her fault that they were in there. Only partly, since she put most of the blame on their own shoulders for not having dealt with any of this until now. She was the mastermind that trapped them in there, but she just wanted what Sofia wanted; for them to be happy again. Damn that kid planting ideas in her head. She wasn't the hopeless romantic type. Sometimes marriages just didn't work and she should have left well enough alone. But saying no to Sofia was easier said than done. It was easier to walk away from her own marriage than it was to say no to her goddaughter in general. It just didn't happen, and now she had to put the pieces of her goddaughter back together because of it.
They both sat staring at each other, not saying a word, both feeling equally chastised. Callie was humiliated because she lived there and Arizona was humiliated because they were causing a scene. They never could control their emotions where the other one was concerned.
Cause Looking For Heaven, Found The Devil In Me
"Look, you're sore, here let me." It didn't occur to her that it was inappropriate, and she had no right to touch her because Callie began to reach for Arizona's leg, but when she quickly pulled away from the touch, Callie looked defeated. Understanding flew out the window or elevator escape hatch to be exact.
"I didn't do it to be cruel Callie..." Arizona looked ashamed as she realised she subconsciously, but automatically pulled away from Callie. She understood that Callie's rant, although it hurt, was the same as what happened that night...a storm of built up emotions exploding with nowhere else to go but directly through the others heart. "Let me try to explain this time please. The danger is that I'm worried that I'll just push you further away again, but Callie I really need you to listen and I realize that this situation is mean because you can't get away, but we really need to figure this out, if not for us then at least for Sofia. You're right we don't talk and we sure as hell don't listen to each other when we do, because we're past the point of understanding when talking happens. But we can't continue to avoid each other or when we are in the same room this explosion happens." Where Callie was a mess, Arizona took the calm route because she knew they needed to clarify things without blame. Well, unwarranted blame at the very least. They both shouldered enough of the real blame and didn't need extra emotionally spurred feelings that had little place except to escalate things to an unhealthy level.
"I know, I'm sorry. I guess I've been holding that in longer than I thought. What I thought is that I'd never get to say it, so I guess having the chance..." Callie shrugged avoiding eye contact and staring at the floor under her legs. "I'm sorry I blew up on you."
"It's okay. Well, it's understandable, but it's my time to talk now. I just need you to hear me out, okay?" Arizona gave a weak smile, nodding her head in hopes to get Callie to agree. "Please let me say what I need to without you getting on the defensive. We never let each other say what we needed to, we either avoided issues or explode ... which is a rational reaction considering, but we won't solve anything that way."
"I'm listening." Callie sat quietly giving Arizona the floor.
"I didn't and couldn't understand the reason why I did what I did. It's taken me awhile, a lot of therapy and a lot of loss to figure it out."
"What?" Callie laughed. "You? You went to therapy?" Arizona looked ashamed. It wasn't for the fact she went to therapy. She was ashamed that it had taken her so long to have done it. She was ashamed because that pesky what-if still lingered in her mind and often. What-if she'd gone before they broke ... what-if?
"Everyday. Everyday I look down and see a constant reminder of what I've lost." Arizona caught Callie's further discomfort as she saw her now shift more out of reach. "Callie." She said gently. "Look at me please." She waited until Callie could look at her. "It's not the leg. Everyday comes and it's here to remind me that ... that I have another day, because of you. I wasn't able to thank you for that because it took me so long, too long to realize that. Another day with Sofia is more than I should have had if you ... if you hadn't ..." She couldn't finish the thought. Taking a deep breath and closing her eyes, Arizona worked quickly to center herself, to push the irrational and irrelevant pain aside. "The past is behind us, it's something I can never change, but I don't want to let it hold me back any longer. I don't want it to hold us back any longer. I admit, the truth is, when Sofia told me about you going to marry Tony, I thought my heart was going to disintegrate. It did some maybe. It made me realize that I can't lose you. It snapped me back." Arizona watched Callie struggle to keep her thoughts internalized and realized she needed to hear what Callie had to say. She'd only hurt both of them by making her keep it inside no matter how much it would hurt to hear it. "What? What are you thinking?" She pushed.
"My first thoughts?" Callie laughed bitterly as Arizona nodded in response. "Too little, too late. I ... I don't see how it mattered, you losing me, when you'd already lost me." It wasn't accusatory, it was sadness. Truthful sadness.
Arizona sighed, nodding in agreement. "I pushed you away because I loved you so damn much, but come on Callie, look at everything. I continued to break you. I needed to let you go, give you something since I took so much away from you already. You had become a ghost, walking the halls, barely a shadow of your former self because of me. And me? I looked in the mirror and didn't recognize the monster looking back. I didn't know who I'd become." Arizona still had some run-ins with that monster, it was nothing she couldn't handle any longer, but the shame of who she was, and who she had turned into was still a very powerful emotion. Callie watched the storm of emotions in Arizona's eyes. The honesty behind her words were nothing but truth and that much Callie could tell. She could also tell that Arizona wasn't done, just collecting her thoughts so she nodded when they made eye contact in a show of support and Arizona went on. "My therapist suggested for me to write you a letter, to explain to you the reasons I sent you here; well, what got us to that point; the divorce in general; everything. But I never sent it, I guess I looked at it and saw me luring you back, and I couldn't do that to you. I know I've hurt you just as much by not sending it, but if I was ever going to tell you, I needed it to be face to face." Arizona looked down at her prosthetic, rolling up her trouser leg; she removed it and let the air get to her limb. "So here goes nothing..." She whispered as she expelled some air.
"That night, Callie, I had been clinging to any memory of who I was before the crash. I thought I was angry at you. I guess I was angry with you, but there was so much more to it, to everything. I was angry because you broke a promise to me; a promise I knew you could never keep because life is out of your control sometimes. I was angry because my head was telling me you were only staying with me out of guilt, you cut off my leg. I felt like I was spiralling out of control, Callie. At first the flirting was nice, it was innocent. Please believe me, it was innocent, like when you would flirt with Ted down in films. It was harmless. I felt so awkward all the time, but she looked at me and saw me for who I felt I used to be, sexy, and desirable. She never knew the whole me, so yes I found the attention to be... to be exhilarating. I had become so numb and she made me feel like who I was before. I could forget about the damn leg; it wasn't an issue. It was nice being the one at the center of attention and it not being about the leg, the crash, or the hospital. Yes, completely selfish of me. I know this now, but then you were so wrapped up in everything else going on, I just needed to feel..."
"What, something other than a pity fuck? Is that what you thought of me when I touched you? When I tried to kiss you, you just thought it wasn't because I loved you, I just felt sorry for you?"
"This isn't working. You're not listening. Just ... let me start over, okay?" She waited for an answer, a nod, a verbal response. She needed to make certain Callie was going to be involved in this conversation and not just a presence in the room.
Callie squeezed her eyes shut, tears escaping the closed lids. Taking deep breath after deep breath, she finally responded. First opening her mouth, but nothing coming out, following it up with a quick, chaste nod.
"Yes I loved you from the moment I set eyes on you; I wanted nothing but you. You are the one thing I have never wanted control over and I love that. Believe me. Please sit there and listen knowing that my love for you never waned even in the worst of the worst, even in my worst. Maybe some of the bitterness you harbor for me can be put aside if you know that's the truth. I promise, okay?" When Callie could only laugh, a rather humorless laugh over a bitterness laced one, Arizona realized her words. "Poor choice of words, I know."
"No, it's fine. I just find promises being made between us to hold little value anymore. And they don't often come out of my mouth either." Callie admitted. She didn't ever say those words, to anybody. They were dangerous and she was terrified of the fallout from ever using them again. "I'll stop. Just ... just keep going.
"I'm not passing blame here, I take full responsibility for my actions. The therapist told me about how, in all trauma cases, there will always be a trigger. I'm not using it as an excuse, I'm just trying to explain. Control Callie, you were right earlier. Control is my trigger. It's such a major part of who I was in a lot of my life, not all of it, just a lot. But I felt like I had lost it all. Laur...She gave me permission to lose control and that triggered me. I realised in that moment that I could take control back. I made that decision...I wanted to feel like me again. That moment was the worst decision I'd ever made, but in the heat of the moment, I couldn't think past my own selfishness."
"So she made you feel something other than the hate I made you feel?" Callie's voice was almost a whisper.
"No, God Callie, no! I felt numb. And when I wasn't feeling numb, I felt nothing, but guilt. I was so filled with shame, all the time, and then we fought, and the poison, it came like a freight train, I couldn't stop it. It was out, I was angry. I blamed you. Ever since the crash I could see the darkness growing in my head and I kept trying to ignore it, be who I used to be. One decision fucked up my life, I blamed you, but the truth of it was I made the decision to get on the plane and I couldn't take responsibility for my actions. I did this to us, I didn't want to hurt you anymore so I let you go. I was in a dark place and I was searching for just a glimpse of who I used to be. The thing was, I was changing before the plane crash. You...our life together has changed me, I never saw that until I had lost you. I never thought I wanted children until I realised that I couldn't live without you. I never stopped loving you, but I knew if we had stayed together and just carried on the way we were, we would have destroyed everything we fell in love with the other about. The time apart, it was horrible, but needed." Arizona looked quickly into Callie's eyes, which were listening intently. As she tried to calm her breathing again, her fingers twisted the material of her shirt. Her hands needed something to take her mind off the pain that was burning from her scar. "I'm scared Callie, I'm scared because I left it too long. It was never meant to have been this long." Arizona sat quietly, waiting for her judge and jury to return with its decision. If they wanted something more for their daughter than the lame attempt at making up for her losses without giving her solid ground to stand on, this was it.
When I'm Weak, I Am Stronger Now
"I wasn't innocent."
"What?" Arizona wasn't expecting that.
"I know I wasn't innocent, Arizona. I knew that, but you gave me little chance to take responsibility for that. We ... we didn't talk and things started looking up. I thought, I didn't want to rock that damn boat again. I didn't want to set us back because I was terrified going back, we'd never find out way out again. I knew things weren't right, everyone else in the accident had found their peace so to speak, but you never talked about it and I didn't push you enough in that respect. I pushed you for sex...for that physical aspect when you needed my help emotionally. I just wanted my Arizona back, but I didn't help you try to find her again. I thought we were better, I thought that because we had rekindled intimately, that everything was better. Maybe I knew better, I did, if I look back on things, but I was… I was so scared Arizona. My world was in shambles and I needed something to hold onto as well. I needed some peace of mind, but I never wanted you to feel as though I was only there because I had done that to you. I thought that if we could love each other again, have sex again, that it meant you loved me again and you didn't hate me anymore. I was too busy trying to fix everything around me that I never realised just how much I should have been fixing my wife. Maybe I was afraid that I couldn't fix you. When I tried to begin with ... well, that's how we ended up here. I couldn't fix you. But selfishly, I thought we were good or on our way to it, and that's my fault for not seeing it. Maybe if I had then we wouldn't be in this position." Callie looked down at her hands. "If we are going to try and move forward then we need to talk, we can't try and fix the other anymore or ... or the past. We have to make decisions together, as a family."
Arizona nodded enthusiastically. She was in. This was her chance, finally. "I'd like that." She whispered as emotions choked her.
Callie smiled wildly, she let a shaky gust of air dispel as she tried to keep her tears from falling. Relieved, after pent up years of anger and hatred, although not gone completely, had started to release its tight grip on her heart. "Hi. I'm Calliope Torres. But my friends call me, Callie. Ortho, currently stuck in an elevator. Pleased to meet you." Callie laughed as she saw Arizona's wide eyes sparkle in a way she never thought she'd ever see again, as she jokingly stuck her hand out waiting for Arizona to take it.
"Arizona Robbins, Peds. I have one leg, also stuck in an elevator and I really need to pee!"
They both laughed hard, the stress in the room evaporating with each passing second. Arizona smiled and then she realised she had to come clean about the reason she was flying back to Seattle. "Callie, in the name of full disclosure, I have something to admit." Callie looked at her suspiciously.
If You Close Your Eyes Does It Almost Feels Like Nothing Changed At All?
"Dr Torres?" A booming male voice interrupted them, bringing them from their conversation into the present. "Are you in there? Your daughter stopped by the office with that rude woman, says you got yourself trapped again." The man on the other side of the steel doors chuckled at Callie's very audible growl.
"For what I pay to live in this building, you'd think they could fix this faulty wire problem." Callie yelled through the door to John, the maintenance man.
"Floor by floor, Dr T. Forty-one floors takes a while, and the old building complicates things. It'll get fixed." He told her this every time, and every time it did nothing to abate her annoyance over it all.
Sighing, Callie shook her head. "I know but this is my..."
"Seventh time this year." He laughed again. "The missus figures with your luck, you'll hit fifteen before the year is out."
"Oh goodie!" Callie clapped sarcastically, her mind now fully on focusing on their exit and no longer on the tail end of their conversation.
Arizona couldn't help but laugh. "At least being a surgeon has taught you to hold your bladder?"
Everybody was finding humor in her seriously bad luck and Callie couldn't help but find it too. "Me, yes. Sofia? Not so much. One time I had to down an entire cup of hot coffee and then carefully balance her to pee in it." She shook her head at the memory. "At least I always carry wipes on me."
"Holy shit, that's where she learned it from!" Arizona smiled at her own memory, even if it wasn't really something to smile at, although now she at least understood that her daughter wasn't as twisted and demented as she thought. Oh, she was still twisted and demented, but the idea wasn't all her own.
"What?" Callie barely heard the mumble, but the smile spreading across Arizona's face caught her attention.
"Trust me, you don't want to know. Just know it's why I still have baby locks on my cabinet doors and Sofia's NOT allowed to offer my dates drinks any longer. And we don't carry apple juice AT ALL."
"Oh gross! Your daughter has issues." Callie caught on quickly, completely grossed out.
"Why is she my daughter when she's bad? I wasn't even certain it happened until you mentioned her ability to urinate in a glass. I mean, we were pretty sure, but who does that stuff?" Arizona asked humor lacing her voice.
"I didn't teach her any of this stuff. You let her hang out with Karev and Yang too much, I'm blaming you."
"Fair enough." Because Arizona couldn't deny that those two hadn't taught her daughter some seriously bad things. More than once she had to punish Karev for teaching her daughter some pretty foul language and that was the best of the worst of it.
"You two want out today or are you going to continue trading war stories?" John peeked his head between the doors he'd just pried open.
Looking up, Callie realized they were between floors when the elevator stopped. They hadn't gotten far, she could still see the number on the side of the entrance with a large 24, but being between floors meant they had to climb out. Arizona was still massaging her leg, and climbing out, crawling to get herself back up on her feet was not going to be easy. "You don't happen to have a ladder with you by chance?" Callie asked hopeful, Arizona too realizing their predicament and panicking at the thought.
"It's twenty-four flights down, Dr T, I'm sorry. I didn't realize you'd be stuck between floors." John thought hard on a plan. "How about one of you hoists the other up and we'll both pull the last of you out?"
Arizona cringed, there was no way she could balance enough to trust herself with Callie's weight and she would not be able to crawl once she was through the threshold.
"Come here." Callie stood up and waited for Arizona to get to her feet.
"You know what? I'm good. I mean I already missed my flight so I'm good just waiting for the power to come back on." Arizona shrugged with disinterest. She was embarrassed enough with the thought of having to try and crawl in front of just Callie, never mind the maintenance man. Through the years, she had managed to master a few awkward things that came with having an above the knee stub. Crawling had been one of the first things she had learnt to do, but she knew that there was no way she would be able to, considering the pain that was radiating from the area right now. Nope she would just wait. Arizona sat back down with a slight plop and avoided eye contact with the two others.
"Really...So you're just going to sit there? You said you needed to pee?"
"Mmm hmm, I was kidding about needing the toilet. I was just trying to be funny?" Arizona crossed her arms in a sign of determination.
"Oh, okay then...funny! Haha. I guess if you are going to wait, I'll wait with you. It gets rather lonely in here by yourself." Callie sat down herself too. "So John, do you have anything to drink up there? I'm so thirsty..." Callie smirked when Arizona's eyes made contact with hers.
"Callie! Don't you dare."
"Aw Sweetie, you have been sitting there for hours are you sure you don't want to move, get a nice ice cold beverage. Some water maybe. I could run the tap for a while, get it nice and cold and wet..." John smirked, reaching down and tossing Callie the bottle of water that he had on him. He hadn't opened it yet, which was lucky for Callie, because the more she had to work with the more chance she could make Arizona uncomfortable. The downside was, even if she couldn't make Arizona move, she was going to have to leave her because she had to pee and couldn't wait much longer. "Would you like some?" Callie offered the bottle to her, making sure some water tipped out. "Oooooops!" Callie smirked as the sound of running water sounded five times louder in the small space.
"Callie, you're not funny!" Arizona pleaded with her ex like a petulant child. Callie knew that even Arizona was going to have a hard time holding on, yes both were good with bladder control in a surgery setting, but Callie wasn't playing fair. "You're getting water everywhere."
"Well, you better get up then?" Callie stood up, extending a hand for Arizona to take.
"Look, two options: you stay in here and end up peeing yourself in front of John ...a grown woman!" Callie overemphasized shaking her head like you would with a naughty child. "Or, you let me lift you up and then you help me out. Unless you just want to wait in the elevator by yourself...This tiny metal box, dangling twenty-three and a half floors up with only the flickering emergency lights to keep you sane." Callie smiled as Arizona begrudgingly gave her her hand.
"So how do you want to do this, because I won't...well my leg is too sore to put any pressure on it right now." Arizona shyly asked, she had been working on her issues with her residual limb with the therapist. She wasn't going to let it define her, she wasn't to be embarrassed by it. But with Callie, all her insecurities came rushing back, and she felt like she was needing to ask for help, like she was weak and she needed to be honest no matter how she felt. This was important.
"Oh, right. Well how about I just, you know!" Callie stood with her arms reaching up trying to mimic a lifting motion. "If I can lift you enough then John can get a good grip of your arms, a little pull and push for you and some pull for me, and we should be out of here." Callie stood looking up at the opening, both of them would definitely be able to slide through.
Arizona copied Callie's current pose. Looking up at the smiling man who was lying on the floor with his arms dangling in, she let a shaky breath out. Not that she was scared, but her and Callie were about to touch. Arizona tried to stop the inappropriate thoughts flushing her system, but the more she fought the thoughts, the more she felt the heat building. They had just spent the best part of three hours fighting with each other, hurting each other, yet the passion for the other woman never waned.
Callie moved over behind Arizona, she hesitated as she figured out where the best position to put her hands was. Arizona hid the flinch, when she felt Callie's touch, with a fake cough. Callie's body was in tight behind Arizona and she was trying everything not to melt, not to just push backward and grind. She almost lost it when she felt Callie's breath at her neck.
"Okay, are you ready?" Callie felt Arizona nod, and she had shut her eyes. Taking in the smell of Arizona's perfume, her hair, it was soothing. "On the count of three, bend your knees and I need you to jump I'll push you up." When she felt the hair brush against her face again, when Arizona nodded, she began. "One...two...three..."
"WAhh Nooo! Callie no, not working...not working!" Arizona panicked as she fell forward. Her hands flat on the wooden panels, trying to stop her falling completely until Callie could ease her down. "You're at the wrong side. I think...If you come around the front you'll be able to use your body to support my weight."
"Right, got you!" Callie nervously sucked in some air and slid herself between Arizona and the wall. Placing her hands on Arizona's waist, she again readied herself. She placed her back against the wall and set her stance. Looking at each other they counted down with just the movement of their heads. With ease Callie lifted Arizona this time, her body helping hold the weight as she made contact with John's outstretched hands. When he started to pull her up, he hesitated for what was a moment. To Callie though, it seemed like forever, as Arizona's crotch was right at face level. She bit her lip as she could almost taste that sweetness that she had longed to have again. As Arizona was pulled from view, Callie rested her head against the elevator wall trying to compose herself.
Two pairs of arms finally appeared from the opening along with a holler of her name, bringing her to face about. Callie looked up and accepted them. Her feet pushing against the frame trying to help the climb out. Finally free, she rolled onto her back and looked up to the ceiling, she started to laugh.
"Is this the bit in the movie when the elevator goes crashing to the ground?" Callie looked over to Arizona who was smiling back at her goofiness.
"Come on, let's get back to the apartment and get a cold drink and a potty break."
"Oh my God, you don't still say that do you?" Callie playfully laughed as Arizona squinted.
"I still work with children, Callie!" Was her reply as she stuck her tongue out. Both women's shoulders had lost a few metaphorical elephants, they both felt lighter on the walk back to the apartment leaving John to do his job, and them to finish theirs.