Chapter Ten

New Orleans

Johnny was lying on his bed.

Neil had just finished giving him a lecture on why he shouldn't smoke. He hadn't been paying attention. Neil had noticed and had yelled at him

Johnny hated being yelled at. His mom would yell at him a lot, he hated it. He had hoped that his aunt and uncle wouldn't yell at him. So far, Ana seemed nice but Neil seemed like a control freak.

During the lecture, Neil had gotten side tracked and had said that he didn't want Johnny to hide out in his room all day any more. He was supposed to hang out with America and his friends the next day. Johnny had tried to say that they hated him, but Neil wouldn't listen. Maybe he could fake sick or something…

The door opened and America came in.

"Don't you know how to knock?" Johnny asked bitterly.

"Look," America said. "Dad said that you're hanging out with us tomorrow. Do me a favor and don't say anything stupid. It wouldn't kill you to get my friend's names right, either."

"I don't want to hang out with you," Johnny said. "Your dad is making me."

"That doesn't change anything," America said. "Just don't say anything stupid."

"I wasn't planning on saying anything at all," Johnny said. "But now I think that I'll say a lot of stupid stuff."

"You do and I kill you," America said. Then he left the room.

Johnny sighed. He couldn't stand America. He didn't know why he was so mean to him. He hadn't even done anything to him.

Johnny went over to his desk and sat down. He hadn't gotten another letter from his friends, but he wanted to write to them. What would he tell them? His uncle had taken his cigarettes away, and his cousin hated him? That wouldn't work. It would just make his friends mad; he didn't want them to get mad.

He wondered if he should start saving up for a bus ticket home. He got an allowance every week. It wasn't much, but he just wanted to get home. Maybe he could get his friends to send him some money. They would do it, he was sure they missed him. Maybe he should call them or something. America was home though, he hated leaving his room when America was home.

Johnny didn't go to dinner. Ana came upstairs and asked him if he was hungry, but he said no. He was, but he didn't feel like leaving his room. He just sat on his window sill and looked out at the street. He wanted to go home. He really wanted to go home.

He felt himself crying, he didn't even try to stop. He wanted his cigarettes, he didn't want to hang out with America, and he wanted to go home.

Ana came into his room. Johnny didn't even notice until he felt her hugging him.

"It's Ok," Ana said softly. "What's wrong?"

"I wanna go home," Johnny whimpered.

"I know," Ana said.

"America hates me," Johnny said. "Neil is making me hang out with him tomorrow and I don't want to."

"You don't have to," Ana said. "But I'm sure America doesn't hate you."

"I want some cigarettes," Johnny mumbled.

"I'll buy you some tomorrow," Ana said. "We'll figure out a way that you can smoke and not get caught."

Ana held Johnny for a while. He couldn't get over how motherly she was acting. She was acting more like his mom than his mom had. She talked to him while she held him. She pretty much talked about nothing, like stuff in his room and how the street needed to be repaved. Then she said "The sunset is really pretty."

Johnny's head had been in his hands, but he looked up. The sunset was pretty. "One of my friends liked sunsets," he said.

"Did she?" Ana asked.

"He," Johnny corrected. "He was different. He liked sunsets and the movies and stuff."

"You really miss them, don't you?" Ana asked.

Johnny nodded. He had stopped crying, but he felt like he was going to cry again. In a way, he liked Ana being there, but in a way he wanted to be alone.

"I know that writing to them isn't the same," Ana continued. "I remember when I went off to college and all my friends didn't. I missed them so much, but I made new friends."

"I don't want new friends," Johnny said. "I want them."

"I know," Ana said. "I'm sorry."

"It's not your fault," Johnny said.

Ana and Johnny sat in silence for a while. After a while she said "You didn't eat dinner, are you hungry?"

Johnny shook his head. He had been hungry earlier, but he wasn't anymore.

"Come downstairs if you decide you want something to eat," Ana said.

Johnny nodded and Ana left. He was lonely. At least he didn't have to hang out with America though. That made everything a bit better.

He left the window sill and went over to his bed. Maybe he could call his friends tomorrow. His aunt and uncle might get mad though. He could probably call them from a pay phone or something. He sighed and started picking at his cast. It was starting to fall apart near the ends, and it was kind of dirty. It had only been three weeks since he'd gotten the cast put on. He still had three more weeks to go. He wondered if his cast would completely fall apart.

He wondered if he would completely fall apart.