Chapter 10: It's just a cold

"It was so cool Sullivan! I never saw a salmon as big as the one I saw in that shop, I should've bought it!"

"Mhm…"

"Sullivan?" My head tilted to the side as I watched the old man's eyes droop slightly before they opened again.

"Oh, I'm so sorry, just a little bit tired-cough-is all uh what were you saying?"

"Yeah, so like I was saying, I was looking through this shop and there was a whole bunch of cool things inside-"

I had spent a great deal of time telling Sullivan about my trip to Bilgewater when I got back, as I told my story I began to notice that Sullivan was having a hard time keeping his eyes open and that he would go into these long, horrible fits of coughing. Every time he would shrug it off like it never happened and urged me to continue on with what I had to say, I probably wouldn't have noticed these things since I was so absorbed in my story but it was hard for me not to notice when these things seemed to happen almost every minute, especially the coughing.

"Are you sure you're okay Sullivan?" I asked, this time my worry showing on my face.

"I'm fine Fizz –cough- I'm just –cough- getting old is all –cough- cough-"

This wasn't the first time I notice Sullivan cough frequently during our talks, but it seemed to be getting worse and worse every day and I was really starting to worry.

"Just –cough- keep telling your story –cough- I really want to –cough- know about your –cough- trip."

When I didn't say anything Sullivan sighed.

"Perhaps we can-cough-talk another time?"

"Sure…"

When I entered Sullivan's office that day I entered feeling excited and happy to tell one of the few people I could call my friend what happened during my trip to Bilgewater, but as I left the office I didn't know how to feel.

I didn't know much about how the human body works and my medical knowledge was very limited, from my best guess though, I think that Sullivan simply had a cold or something-yeah, that makes sense, right?

After spending the rest of my day with Amumu by the lake, any thoughts of Sullivan and his coughing were pushed to the back of my mind.

It was only when I went to see him the next day was I reminded of his illness.

For whatever reason Sullivan refused to tell me anything about his cold and even went as far as to pretend that he was perfectly okay and that he wasn't sick at all, but I remember seeing him walk out of the medical ward yesterday with a worried look on his face.

Whatever it was it didn't seem like it was contagious or else Sullivan wouldn't have let me see him, which was odd since I thought colds were contagious? Maybe only some of them?

"Then we got on the ship and sailed back to the mainland, by around sundown we made it back to the league." I finished up my story, Sullivan looked pleased.

"Sounds like you had a lot of fun –cough-cough-"

"Yeah, I did." I tried to say with a energetic voice, but it was hard with Sullivan coughing a storm right in front of me, I really was worried for him.

"That's –cough- good of you Fizz –cough- I'm glad you're making-cough-cough-cough- friends."

I couldn't ignore that constant coughing anymore, I had to say something even if he tried ignoring me.

"Sullivan, please tell me what's wrong, I know that you're sick and you can't just act like you aren't!"

"Fizz I'm not –cough- sick, this happens-cough-cough- as you get older…"

"You keep saying that, but I know you're lying!" My voice noticeably trembled showing my fear for Sullivan's health, he seemed to notice this.

"…really Fizz, I'm –cough- fine, it's just a cold."

"You promise it's just a cold?"

"…-cough- yes. –cough-"

This couldn't be just some cold, there was no way, I never heard of anyone having a cold for this long and not getting at least slightly better, if he was getting constant treatment from Soraka he would've been cured of days after it first showed up.

It seemed that no one wanted to tell me what was wrong with Sullivan, I even went to the medical ward to ask Soraka what was wrong with him and she just said,

"Don't worry Fizz, he'll be alright." I could tell that the smile that had accompanied that was forced.

Does everyone really think I'm that dumb? I might not be the smartest guy around this place, but I can tell when someone I'm not so dumb that I can't tell if someone is lying to me.

I started growing frustrated the more times I asked Soraka if he really was fine and only got a "he'll be okay" response. If I ever wanted to figure out what was making Sullivan cough like that I would have to find out myself it seemed.

The good thing about being my size and being as agile as me was that I could slip past people undetected fairly easily.

Sullivan went to the medical ward to talk with Soraka in the morning and during the night, since there was less people working in the medical ward at night I decided to put my enact my plan when night came.

I hid behind a pillar as Sullivan left his office and locked it. Taking a peak around the corner of the pillar I was hiding behind I saw him walk down the hall and I followed after him. I followed him from a distance for a few minutes before we arrived at the medical ward.

With no more pillars to hide behind I had to be more careful when following Sullivan in the medical ward.

He talked with a lady at the front desk while I watched from behind a large plant pot , after a few minutes he walked down the hall to the right of the front desk, after making sure no one could see me I continued following him.

We passed by a few nurses and doctors on the way, but luckily It seemed like no one noticed me thankfully.

After walking past a few rooms we arrived at what I assumed was Soraka's office since that was the room Sullivan walked into. After he shut the door behind him I came out of my hiding sport and walked over to the door. I pressed a ear against it to try and hear what was on the other side, I could tell two people, most likely Soraka and Sullivan, were talking but I couldn't hear what they were saying.

Feeling bold I grabbed the door handle and ever so slowly opened the door a crack, I could see Sullivan sitting in front of Soraka's desk and I could just barely see the top of Soraka's head on the other side. Their voices were much more understandable now that the door was open and I listened in to their conversation.

"T-That can't be! –cough- I swear-cough-cough- I'm feeling better!"

I heard Soraka sigh then say,

"High Summoner Sullivan, I'm sorry, but you are only getting worse every day."

"That's not-cough-true! Why just yesterday-cough- I went out for a walk around-cough- the institute!"

"How many times did you have to stop to take a break?"

Sullivan was silent.

"Exactly my point, I'm sorry Sullivan, but you aren't getting any better and I'm afraid there is nothing more I can do for you except make this as painless as possible."

Sullivan kept quiet.

"Please don't do that now Sullivan."

I heard soft whimpering coming from Sullivan and I realized why he was silent, he was crying.

"Please…-cough-there must be something…"

"I'm afraid there isn't, if there was anything I could do you would be fine by now, all you can do is let nature take its course…I'm sorry."

I watched Sullivan put his hands to his face and his crying intensified.

"H-How-cough-much longer…?"

"…I can't be sure Sullivan, but if your condition keeps getting worse you will probably have a month or two left…three if you're lucky…"

What did they mean by he only had a month or two left? It couldn't be what I was thinking…no it couldn't be…please don't let it be that…

Sullivan removed his face from his now wet hands and nodded.

There was a silence between the two for a minute before Soraka asked,

"Have you told him yet?"

"-cough-no…and I don't want to –cough-"

"You will have to sometime-"

"No, no, no I won't."

Another short period of silence.

"You're going to have to tell him sometime, you know this Sullivan."

"Not-cough-now though."

"Why not now?"

"…-cough-I just-cough-cough-can't…not right now, I don't-cough- want to right now…"

"Why?"

"-cough-answer my question first…"

"okay."

"I want you to give me your honest opinion of what…-cough-cough-you think of Fizz…"

Silence except for the occasional coughing coming from Sullivan filled the room until Soraka finally answered his question,

"I haven't spoken to him or seen him around the institute a lot, so I can't say I like him, nor can I say I don't like him."

"Well you're-cough- one of the few people-cough-cough-that don't hate him…he just started-cough-cough-making friends, even if it's just two people-cough- it's more than zero." Sullivan sniffed and whipped the tears from his face. "Things are going so good for him-cough-cough- I don't want to ruin it with-cough-this…"

"…but-"

"Tomorrow okay? I'll tell him-cough-tomorrow when-cough-he comes to visit-cough-"You said that the last time I saw you,

"I-cough-mean it this time." Sullivan groaned and leaned back in his seat. "I don't-cough- know how I will tell him though…"

"Just tell him everything."

I saw Sullivan nod his head then slowly stand up from his chair.

"I think I should get going now, I'm –cough-cough- tired…"

"Are you sure you don't want anything for the coughing?"

"No-cough-point, not like it does anything for me."

"I'm so sorry Sullivan, I wish I could help you."

"Forget –cough-it, this was bound to happen one day, no use-cough-running from it…goodnight Soraka."

"Goodnight Sullivan."

Quickly, but as quietly as possible, I closed the door and took cover behind a pot, Sullivan came walking out shortly afterwards.

He simply stood in the middle of the hall and looked down at the ground, he eventually began walking down the hall. I waited until he was out of sight then I began to cry.

On my way to Sullivan's office I felt more nervous than any other walk to his office before, even though I knew what he was going to say it didn't seem to help calm my nerves.

I stared at his door for a few minutes before I worked up the courage to knock on it.

"Come in!-cough-" I heard from the other side.

I opened the door and walked inside then sat in my usual seat.

"Oh hell Fizz-cough- good morning." Sullivan did his best to smile even though the coughing was making it hard on him to do so.

"Good morning."

"I wasn't expecting-cough-you to come so early-cough-" I picked up on the nervousness in his voice, was he really finally going to tell me the truth?

"Well, I just wanted to say hi before I go hang out with Amumu."

"That's good, I actually-cough-have something to talk with you about."

Here it goes…

"What is it?"

"…Fizz, have I ever told you how old-cough-I am?"

"No I don't think so…oh wait, yeah, you told me that you were 130 years old!"

"I wasn't joking." Sullivan said dead seriously.

"Really?" I asked, genuinely surprised, he looked in his seventies or early eighties.

"Really, being a high summoner-cough- I have a great knowledge on magic, the best way I could describe this to you is basically-cough- since I have such good connection to the magical energy around us, I had my lifespan increased slightly."

I nodded my head in understanding.

"However, no matter how good this connection is–cough-it won't keep me alive forever, that's a different kind of magic I don't-cough-cough- want to dwell in."

"What are you trying to say?"

"…Fizz I'm dying."

For some reason, hearing this come from Sullivan was worse than when I basically heard it from Soraka.

"W-What?"

"I'm dying-cough-cough-, that's why I've been coughing like-cough-this, my connection to the magical energy is dwindling."

"W-When are you going to…to…"

"Die? Soraka told me that I have a month or two left to live…that's a lie though."

Did I just hear that correctly? What does he mean by that? Does this mean he has actually a longer time to live? Sadly this wasn't the case.

"Soraka is a kind woman, she-cough- doesn't like me worrying-cough-cough-over this, I know I'm going to die a lot sooner than that, I can feel it."

"You can't die though!" I began to panic. "Who's going to be there to give me advice? Who's going to be there when I need someone to talk to?! No you can't die, you just can't die!"

"Fizz please, calm down."

"How can I? you were the only person that ever cared about me, the one person in the world that didn't hate me!" I could feel the tears running down my face, but I didn't care and ignored them. "You are the one person that stood by my side when I got in trouble, you are the only one that bothered to make that gross tea you like to make when I was sad, I didn't even care that it tasted gross it was the nicest thing anyone done for me!"

"Fizz…"

"And there is just so much more you've done for me that I can never repay you for! Please you can't die, I don't want to be alone…please…"

I closed my eyes and sobbed uncontrollably, I didn't want to lose one of the few good things I had left in this world.

Sullivan had always been there for me and done so much for me that would take a lifetime to repay for, he was the first person to ever show me kindness and the closest thing I had to a father.

I opened my eyes when I suddenly felt a pair of thin arms wrap around me. I looked up and saw Sullivan looking down at me with tears of his own.

"Gods you remind me so much of myself when I was-cough-younger…"

"H-How?"

"I was always getting into trouble when I was-cough- younger, I got into trouble so much that-cough- everyone avoided me and-cough- simply wanted nothing to do with me." Sullivan chuckled sadly. "I had no friends-cough-and the only person I had in my life was my mom-cough-she was the only person that ever gave a damn about-cough-me."

"That 'gross' tea I make you when I can? My-cough-mom used to make that for me too when I was sad, unlike you I liked it though…heh." Sullivan sighed. "On my eighteenth birthday was also the day that she-cough-died from lung cancer…so trust me I know-cough-how you must be feeling right now…"

I continued weeping , but looked up at him as he talked.

"The big difference between you and me is that-cough-you made a friend, Amumu. Now you even-cough- have Miss Fortune as a friend, I wouldn't make my first friend until I was thirty! The point I'm trying to make Fizz is that you don't have to be alone, you got friends-cough-now, and judging from how you describe them, who really care about you."

"I know, but…I still don't want to lose you…please don't go…."

"If I had a-cough-choice I would live another hundred years so I could stay-cough-with you, but I don't."

How true his words were, but they still felt like thorns being shoved through my heart.

"I should've told you-cough- all of this earlier-cough-and I'm sorry for not."

"It's fine Sullivan, it's fine…"

"I don't know how much longer I have to live, its-cough-certainly not a–cough-month, it could be in a week…tomorrow…"

"D-Don't say that…"

"It's true-cough- I don't have a lot of time left-cough- In this world, so let's not spend-cough-it being sad."

I sniffed then whipped a few tears from my face, if that was what he wanted I would do my best not to be sad.

"How about I go make us-cough-some tea?"

"Please don't."

Sullivan chuckled and nodded his head.

"Fine, you don't-cough-know what you're missing."

"Oh I do." I managed a chuckled.

"How about we-cough-go get something to eat then? I'm starving."

"Okay."

The next few days I spent as much time as I could with Sullivan, any moment I wasn't with Amumu or in a match I was with Sullivan.

We had so much fun together that for awhile I forgot that he was dying…until one night Soraka came knocking on my door.

She didn't say anything except for me to follow her and so I did without question, she took me to some room in the medical ward and in the room I saw someone I really hoped to not see in here.

"Sullivan…" I whispered.

I heard Soraka close the door behind me, most likely to leave us the two of us alone. I was glad because I already felt myself begin to cry. I ran over to the side of his bed and climbed on top of it so I could look at him better.

His eyes were half opened, his lips parted as he breathed softly. He wasn't even coughing anymore, just staring up at the ceiling not blinking.

"Sullivan…?" I whispered again.

His head turned ever so slowly to me and he smiled weakly.

"Hello Fizz." Sullivan said, his own voice barely going above a whisper. "I'm glad you came…don't know how long I could hold on for you…"

"It's…It's time?"

Sullivan nodded.

I had time to accept the fact that Sullivan was dying and have come to peace with it a little…emphasis on a little.

"Are you sure there's nothing that can-"

"Please Fizz, none of that."

"I'm sorry, I...I just don't want you to go."

"I wouldn't if I didn't have to Fizz, don't be sorry…" Sullivan sighed. "I feel it, any minute now…"

I felt Sullivan's hand grab hold of mine gently and I placed my other hand on his.

"Fizz, can you promise me two things."

"Y-Yeah." I said through my sobs.

"You've made some good friends from what you told me. Don't ever let them go, this world is hard enough having to face it by yourself."

"I won't."

"And also, try not to get into trouble, I'm afraid I can't help you now if you do."

"I can't promise that." I smiled sadly. "If it helps…I will try not to."

Sullivan smiled then slowly closed his eyes and let out a sigh.

"You're a good person Fizz, I don't ever regret the day I met you and hopefully we will meet again, perhaps in another life…goodbye Fizz."

Sullivan's breathing grew slower and slower until finally it stopped all together.

His hold on my hand loosened, but I still held onto it and cried into the palm of his hand.

"Goodbye Sullivan…I'll miss you…"

A/N: "A man is not old until regrets take the place of dreams." -John Barrymore

That quote is the best one I could find that describes Sullivan because he regrets not making any real friends until he was much older. It's depressing quote, but sadly true for Sullivan.

This chapter was pretty sad to say the least, mostly near the end. My eyes kind of got watery typing this because I'm sure like most people we have lost someone we loved to old age like a grandparent, great-grandparent, etc. Old age seems like one of the most peaceful ways to go and most likely is the most peaceful way to go. It's still very sad when they…well, have to go.

If you're grandparent, or even luckier great-grandparent, are still alive and you have any love for them make sure that every moment you spend with them come with no regrets, you don't know if they will still be there the next morning, this goes for anybody of any age but especially for older people.

…I'm sorry for the sad chapter, hopefully the next one will be less sad!

Until then, have a great day/night!