Author's note: For years there has been an endless debate in the SMK fan community as to whether Lee and Amanda slept together before they were married. There are great arguments for both sides, but in the great "did they or didn't they" debate, I've always belonged to the camp that believes they did. Some of the dialogue in this and a couple of later chapters reflect this. If this offends anyone, my apologies, but I have to write what I believe.

Dotty had gone out to the back yard to work in her flower garden while the rest of the family was preparing to move in the new member of their household.

"Boys, Do me a favor," Amanda said to her sons. "Go out to the garage. There should be some leftover empty packing boxes out there from the last time we cleaned out the attic. Go get them and load them in the car for me."

"Sure, Mom, "Phillip said as he grabbed his brother by the arm to drag him along with him.

"Hey," Jamie yelled. "Cut it out!"

"Phillip, come on, "Amanda said."Let go of your brother and behave."

"Hey, guys, while you're out there, can you see if you can find some rope or twine?"Lee said.

"You got it," Phillip replied.

"Rope," Amanda questioned.

"Yeah, I was thinking that even though we made room for the clothes that were in my suitcase, that one dresser upstairs is not going to be enough for both your clothes and mine."

"I can always go through it and get rid of some stuff," Amanda suggested.

"No, I don't want you giving up anything for me. I just thought I would bring my chest-of-drawers over here and we could make some room for it in the bedroom. I'm pretty sure it's narrow enough that we can fit it in the back of the wagon, but we'll have to tie down the tailgate because we won't be able to close it."

"That sounds like a good plan."

"The rest of the furniture we'll either have to sell or put in storage."

"Now, wait a minute. You just said you don't want me giving anything up for you. What makes you think I want you giving anything up for me?"

"Amanda, that furniture doesn't mean anything to me. What means something to me is being here with you and really starting our life together. Other than the chest, there's just one other thing I was thinking about."

"Oh, what's that?"

"The bed from my apartment, I wanted to bring it over here too."

"Where would we put it?"Amanda said with a chuckle.

"I meant to replace the one upstairs. I didn't say anything last night because you were so out of it and you needed your rest, but I felt really uncomfortable sleeping next to you in the same bed you used to share with Joe."

"Sweetheart," she said as she lovingly stroked his face. "I see where this is coming from, but you don't have to worry about that. The only man who's ever slept in that bed with me is you. I never shared it with Joe."

"You didn't?"

"No, I didn't even share that bedroom with Joe." When Lee looked at her dumbfounded, she added, "Didn't you ever notice that Mother has the bigger bedroom?"

"I guess I never paid that much attention."

"The day that I filed for divorce, I moved out of the room that Mother's in now and moved into the one I'm in. The room that you and I shared last night used to be the guest room that Mother would sleep in when she came to visit. I couldn't stand to even look at that other room knowing that I was going to be sleeping there alone because it was just a painful reminder that my marriage failed. Then when mother moved in permanently, I asked her to take the master bedroom for that very reason."

Lee smiled. "I learn a little bit more about you every day." He kissed her softly.

"I don't object to swapping out the bed upstairs for the one at the apartment, if you want to. The one at your place does hold some meaning for us. That is where we were the first time we made love."

"I remember," He said as he kissed her again. "I also remember that was after you fell asleep on me."

"You were tired too, remember? We'd been up for almost two days straight trying to help Zhmed. After I woke up on the couch, I had to wake you up."

"And what a wake up it was," he said kissing her a third time. This time, Amanda didn't let him back away. She snaked her arms around his neck and pulled him closer, deepening the kiss.

"Ahem," they heard behind them. They turned to find Jamie staring at them with a frown on his face.

"What it is, Jamie," Amanda asked concerned by the look on her younger son's face. She extricated herself from her husband's embrace.

"The boxes are in the car," he said stiffly.

"Thank you, Sweetheart," she said as she patted his shoulder. Jamie shrugged her off."Lee, can you go see what Phillip's up to?"

"Yeah," Lee replied sensing that she needed some one on one time with her youngest.

"Let's talk," she said reaching for Jamie's hand and guiding him to the couch in the den. After they were settled she said, "Jamie, what's going on?"

"Nothing," he said with a shrug.

"Come on, Jamie, that's not a nothing look you've got on your face." She took both of her hands in his and said, "Listen, I know this is rough and a little weird for you. Lee and I dropped a big bombshell on you today and I would understand if you're a little upset about it, but the only way we're all going to get through this is if we're honest with each other. Talk to me." When her son was still silent, she said, "Are you upset because you saw us kissing?"

"No," he said defiantly but the look on his was not very convincing.

"Sweetie, I need you to be honest with me and tell me what you're feeling. Families can't keep secrets from each other."

"Like the secrets you kept from me and Phillip and Grandma?"

"I know I kept secrets, but I kept those secrets to keep you safe. Lee wasn't kidding when he said our job is highly dangerous, but that's why it's so important that we take advantage of the time we have together while we have it. Now, I made a promise to you and your brother that I would never keep secrets from you again, now that everything is all out in the open."

"No secrets? So, what were you and Lee really doing upstairs this morning?"

"I told you what we were doing. We were unpacking and-"

"Stop lying!" Jamie shouted. "I heard you!"

"Heard what, Jamie," She probed a little concerned that he had heard them making love. When he didn't answer, she tried again. "Jamie, what exactly did you hear?" Jamie remained silent. "I need you to talk to me. We're never going to resolve this if we don't talk to each other." Stony silence remained so Amanda decided to take a different approach. "Did you hear me and Lee when we were in the shower? Is that what you were talking about?"

Jamie swallowed hard and nodded. "When dad brought us home, we went upstairs to put our stuff up. Phillip went straight to our room, but I wanted to see you so…"

"You went to my room," She said realization dawning that they hadn't locked the bedroom door. Jamie nodded again.

"I heard the shower running so I was going to leave, but then I heard you kind of moaning like you were in pain and heard the things he was saying to you, what he was doing to you. I got out of there as fast as I could after that."

Amanda sighed, "Jamie, I'm sorry that you heard all that. We never intended for that to happen. We didn't know you guys were going to be home this soon. Is that why you made that wisecrack earlier about Lee not wanting you here?" Jamie nodded again. "Listen, Sweetheart, I know this is weird for you. It's a little weird for me to, but I want you to know that Lee wasn't hurting me and he wasn't doing anything to me that I didn't want him to. You've been taking sex education this year in school, right? I remember signing the permission slip for it."

"Yeah," he said and blushing a little.

"And you and I have talked about the birds and the bees, right?"

"Yeah," he said again.

"Ok, so you know that when two people love each other, they want to be close to each other, right?" Jamie nodded silently. Well, that's what was going on in the shower. Lee and I were just expressing our love for one another. We should have locked the bedroom door and we didn't, but we thought it was just your grandma in the house." When Jamie was still silent, she said, "Jamie, honey, please don't make this any harder than it already is. I have been so lonely for so long and I've tried to put all that loneliness into loving you guys and taking care of you, so it didn't hurt so much. It may sound selfish, but now that I have somebody who loves me enough to keep me from being lonely I have to act on it so it doesn't hurt anymore."

"If you were so lonely, why didn't you just get back together with Dad?"

Realization hit Amanda like a ton of bricks. "Is that what this is really about? You want me and your dad back together?"

"What's wrong with that?"

"What's wrong with it is that it's never going to happen. You have to understand that."

"Why? Don't you love Dad? You always kiss him when he comes over here."

"Yes, I love your dad," Amanda said cringing a little. It had never occurred to her how confusing the little pecks she gave Joe would be to her son. She'd have to put a stop to it. It was really just a habit more than anything, but habits could be broken. "But not the way I love Lee. Not the way that a wife should love a husband. I love him like you love an old friend. And when you've seen me kiss him, it's the same thing. We're good friends and we probably always will be, but our life together as a couple was over a long time ago. Even before the divorce, we hadn't been happy together for a long time, probably since you were about three. Your dad and I had to split up so we could both find a way to be happy again."

"With other people, you mean?"

"That wasn't what I meant. When we filed for divorce, the last thing on my mind was finding someone else. I wasn't looking for Lee when I found him. I just wanted a chance to not be unhappy anymore. The last few years that your dad and I were together, all we did was make each other miserable. When that happens that's when a couple has to decided if they make each other happy more that they hurt each other. If the answer to that question is no, then it's time to do something about it. That's what happened with me and your dad. We were hurting each other more than we were making each other happy. We realized that if we kept going that way, we'd end up hurting you and Phillip too. Children shouldn't have to see their parents hurting each other. In the end, we were happier not being together than we were together. Now, your dad has Carrie to make him happy and I have Lee to make me happy."

"You do seem happy," Jamie conceded.

"I am, Sweetheart. I'm very, very happy with Lee and I'm proud that he asked me to be his wife."

"So, don't you think it's better this way for your dad and me to be happy with other people than to be miserable together?"

"Yeah, I guess," Jamie said grudgingly.

"You guess?"

"Yes, it's better. I don't want you to be miserable. I love you."

"I love you too, Sweetheart," she said and pulled him into her arms, not caring that it may send shooting pains through her upper body again. She needed her son to know that he was loved. While she was holding her son, she heard the French doors leading to the back door open behind her.

"Is it safe to come in yet?"Lee called poking his head through the door.

Amanda pulled back from Jamie and said, "What do you think? Is he still welcome here?"

Jamie's response was to spring from the couch and engulf Lee in a big hug.

"What was that for," Lee said with a smile as he hugged the boy back.

Jamie looked up at him and said, "For making my mom so happy." He then darted out the door.

"Is everything ok?"

"Yeah, fine. I'll tell you all about it later."

"Ok, so are we ready to go then?"

"Actually, I was thinking I'd stay here and do some more organizing, making room for your stuff."

"Amanda, I already told you I'm going to bring that dresser over here."

"I'm not just talking about your clothes. You've also got books, records, videos, A TV and VCR. I'm not going to let you just get rid of all that stuff. Besides, I'm not going to be a huge help to you anyway since I can't list much right now and it will give you some male bonding time with the boys doing all the heavy work together."

"All right, but you be careful and don't overdo it."

"I won't. I was actually thinking of dragging Mother out of her garden to help me."

"That would make me feel a whole lot better. I'll just tell her you need some help on the way out."

"Ok, good. "I'll see you later," she gave him a quick kiss before he walked out the door.