Eve leapt up and down on Ivy's bed until the young girl woke up.
"What? Eve! What?" Ivy hissed. "I was dreaming about taking over the world."
"I can't sleep." Eve said as she lay next to her friend.
"Why?" Ivy asked. Then there was a bang against the wall and the sound of groans.
"That's why." Eve whispered.
"EW!" Ivy almost screamed as she pulled the covers over hers and Eve's head.
"They've been at it for ages." Eve said.
"Well… we don't know who it is. Our minds haven't been tainted with terrible images yet." Ivy pointed out. After a few seconds they heard high pitch screams.
"JOKER!" The screams cried.
"Oh God." Ivy muttered. She rolled over and fell out of the bed on purpose.
"Where are you going?" Eve asked. Ivy slammed her fist on the wall but the screams blocked the noise out. She sighed and walked over to the closet. Eve followed with the duvet still wrapped around her.
"She's going to be sore in the morning." Ivy said as she switched her speakers on.
"Ivy that's disgusting." Eve snapped as Ivy made sure the music wasn't loud enough for any one else to hear.
"I can see it in your eyes Eve." Ivy smirked. "You're dying to know how big little joker is."
"No." Eve snapped.
"You can't keep up the sweet innocent Irish girl act forever. I can see through you!" Ivy teased. "I can see you just want the Joker to…."
"LA LA LA LA LA!" Eve yelled blocking out Ivy's sentence. When Eve stopped Ivy was still talking.
"…. Over and over and over again. Like a never ending cycle of…" Ivy said. Eve continued to block out her friend.
"… Upside down." Ivy finished as Eve took her hands off her ears.
"What goes on in your head, I'll never know." Eve muttered.
00
The next day Eve and Ivy sat at the table ready to drop. Neither of them had slept all night. Eve hadn't bothered to put any make up on and was looking less dressy up then usual. Ivy was wearing a pair of glasses as well as an oversized hoodie.
"I didn't know you wore glasses." Harley said to Ivy as she sat opposite her.
"I'm short sighted." Ivy muttered. "I'm meant to wear them all the time but I only put them on when I'm too tired to function."
"You tired? Didn't you get any sleep?" Harley asked.
"No!" Eve yelled. "We didn't you dirty bitch!"
"What?" Harley asked, suddenly wishing the Joker was in the room.
"We heard you!" Eve yelled. "Oh Joker! Harder! Yes! Yes! That's it! Uhh! Joker! Joker! Harder!"
"What…" The Joker's voice muttered as he walked in.
"Hey Eve." Ivy smiled.
"Yeah?" Eve asked.
"Run for your life." Ivy laughed. Eve nodded and tried run out of the room as fast as she could. The Joker grabbed her arm and pushed her back in the room.
"I don't want another sister." Eve yelled. "Ivy is enough."
"This 'family' makes me feel suicidal." Ivy muttered.
"Invest in sound proof walls." Eve snapped.
"Eve is just jealous because she wants the Joker to stick his big-" Ivy began to say but was drowned out by Eve.
"LA LA LA LA LA LA!" Eve screamed.
"…over and over again."
"LA LA!"
"… then forcing his…."
"LA LA LA!"
"…while blood pours…."
"LA LA LA!"
"… With a lemur watching."
"Ivy you are one fucked up kid." The Joker said. "You're my new favourite."
"Boo yah!" Ivy grinned as she slapped her hands down on the table.
"I don't want the one who makes fun of my… noises." Harley muttered.
"You people disgust me." Eve muttered.
"You love me really." Ivy said with a smile as she wrapped her arms around her friend.
"No!" Eve snapped. "You are off my Christmas list."
"Good thing you're both up early any way." The Joker said. "You're both going to school."
Ivy burst out laughing and walked over to the Joker.
"Good joke... you had me there." She laughed. Then she saw the Joker's serious face and she nearly began to cry. "You're joking right... tell me you're joking... WHY AREN'T YOU JOKING! YOU'RE THE JOKER! YOU'RE MEANT TO JOKE!"
"School? Really? Yes! I'm going to get an education!" Eve asked happily.
"I'm not going." Ivy yelled. Then she saw the Joker glaring at her and she took a few steps back.
"You don't have a choice." The Joker said.
"Yes. Me and Mr J need some alone time." Harley said.
"Then send us to a play area!" Ivy snapped.
"How old are you?" Eve asked with a shake of the head.
"I'm not going to school." Ivy said with her arms crossed.
00
The school was huge and Ivy felt like she was going to throw up. Eve on the other hand was jumping up and down in her seat.
"No one's going to like me." Ivy frowned. "Don't make me go in. I'll do anything! I'll rob a bank! I'll catch Batman."
"Come on, silly goose." Eve smiled as she pulled Ivy out of the van.
"I'll have a panic attack." Ivy moaned as she was pulled towards the school.
"We'll get an education and have fun!" Eve smiled.
"I can't believe you dressed like that for our first day of school." Ivy hissed as they walked through the main doors.
Eve looked down at what she was wearing and raised an eyebrow. She was wearing a pair of shorts with one red and one yellow knee high socks. She wore a black tank top and a pink waist coat. Along with a tie which Ivy suspected was the Joker's.
"You look like a clown puked on you." Ivy sighed. "And they're my shorts!"
"You look normal." Eve spat as she looked at her friend who wore a purple hoodie and a pair of black skinny jeans.
"Are you the new girls?" A voice said. The two girls spun around and saw a tall blonde haired girl smiling at them.
"Yes." Eve said happily.
"I'm Marty." The overly happy girl smiled. "I'll be showing you around today."
"Oh joy." Ivy muttered sarcastically as Eve dragged her over to Marty.
"What lessons do you have first?" The blonde asked.
"Maths." Eve smiled.
"Kill me now." Ivy frowned.
"Wait... if you're sisters then why are you Irish and you are English." Marty asked.
"Because we just are." Ivy snapped. She wasn't happy about being sent to school at all.
"Because Ivy here has mental problems." Eve smiled.
"But since your hair is red shouldn't..." Marty tried to say, pointing to Ivy but giving up and putting her hand down after Ivy glared at her.
"So...Math's, any idea where we are going?" Eve chirped, rocking back on her heels with a smile plastered on her face.
"Erh...sure, I'll help you around the school for the day" Marty said awkwardly, glancing between the two 'sisters' with her arms crossed firmly on her books which she held tightly to her chest.
She had bleached blonde hair that was a bit dry looking, which fell down her back a bit TOO straight. Her make-up seemed a bit orange to be natural and everything about her screamed 'girly' or 'pink' which caused Ivy to hate her even more. She was tall, but that could have been her heels. Her heels may have been long but her skirt certainly wasn't. It was so short; April Rhodes wouldn't be able to shoplift with it.
"And here we go!" Eve said a bit like the Joker. Ivy just rolled her eyes and continued to follow the personified Barbie.
Math turned out to be hell. Eve got frustrated. A first she raised her hand for the teacher and tried to laugh it off but Ivy actually got scared of Eve for once. Ivy thought that Eve was going to smash her calculator, which she did in the end. The class all looked in their direction after they heard the sound of the calculator shattering. They looked away after Ivy glared at them and Eve looked in a different direction, scratching her ear with a pencil.
As soon as the bell rang and everyone began to shuffle out of the classroom, Eve took her time packing her bags and Ivy whispered, "What the hell was that?"
"What was what?" Eve asked innocently, slinging her bag over her shoulder and walking out of the room, forcing Ivy to follow behind her. Ivy was actually getting kind of sick of that.
"Your little anger management thing in the middle of class!"
Eve spun around, trying to hold back her flaming temper, "I do NOT have an anger management problem" Eve gritted out through her teeth, "and even if I DID would you blame be"
"Gee Eve, that has got to be the most sane thing I have ever heard you say!"
Eve closed her eyes and tried to get a bit of self control and resumed her walk to their next class. Ivy rolled her eyes and sat down at the back of the room with Eve who dumped her books on the table which caused a huge BANG to ring out across the room.
Marty walked in and gave the girls a WTF look.
Eve ignored her and began to draw mindlessly inside her notebook as Ivy gave her a wave and got her books out. The teacher walked in as soon as the class room was full and looked around
"Ah, two new girls! Would you like to come up here and introduce yourselves?"
Ivy inwardly groaned and got up with Eve following in tow.
"I'm Eve and I don't have an anger management problem" Eve said with a bright smile in a cheery voice. "I'm Irish and...this class should rock cause I love English and I always did well in my classes back home, well that and the fact that I love to read, take it away Ives!" Eve stood back and pointed at her English friend like a game show host.
"I'm Ivy, I'm from England...erh...she is my sister, um...we just moved here...I hate people" she muttered, her entire speech up to then had been in a very quiet, nervous voice. "I obviously speak English and Eve DOES have an anger problem so just, be careful"
The teacher just stared at the two in shock.
"If you two are sisters why are you guys from different nationalities?" a boy near the front asked. It was obvious that this guy would be one of the class jerks.
"None of your business" Ivy replied quietly yet defensively.
"What, cat got your tongue?" he teased, raising a cocky eyebrow.
"We are sisters because of your mother!" Eve snapped coming up with the first thing that she thought of. Back home that's what everyone said. If someone asked the time the other person would just say 'your mother' and walk off.
The jerk didn't know what to say so she shut up as the two girls went back to their seats.
"Okay that was certainly interesting...let's start today's class our novel, can everyone please take out your copy of Twilight?"
Everyone in the class pulled out their copies of the black covered book with the hands and the apple, even Eve, even though none of the girls had known about the novel
"What the hell?" Ivy said a bit too loud, "Traitor" she hissed at Eve.
"Is there a problem Miss Ivy?" the teacher asked.
"Erm sure. Why are we being forced to read a story about fairy vampires?"
This earned a few sniggers from a few of the students.
"Excuse me?" the teacher asked incredulously.
"Well think about it! They sparkle in sunlight like fairies! Either that or they love to wear glitter! That Alice one must spike there bears and mountain lions with glitter. 'Here Kitty eat the glitter'!" Ivy began to rant, completely forgetting her nervousness and earning a few approving looks from the class Goths.
"And if you take it seriously and look at it from a normal point of view, Edward is a 109 year old stalker and paedophile. I mean he WATCHES Bella sleep! I mean, come on STALKER! And Bella isn't so perfect herself, I bet she drinks, if you catch my drift, she is always moaning and complaining! And Jasper HAS to be doing weed and don't even get my started on that doctor!"
"OKAY THAT'S ENOUGH!" the teacher had to shout over Ivy to cut off her rant. "If you want to debate this I suggest you join the debate team and settle this but for now you are in English and you will follow the class"
Ivy sat back down and took Eve's notebook which she had been drawing in earlier as Eve was too immersed in the book.
She began to scribble her own drawings inside the notebook but got fed up and began to flick through it. She had to admit, Eve really DID have a gift, she SAW things and she could make them exactly the same and draw an amazing picture or she could twist it into something dark yet beautiful. She had a way of seeing things her OWN way and THOSE pictures were mind blowing!
When she grew bored of that she decided to tune into the class.
"So why do you think that Edward did that? He stayed away and told her all of those things, yet he happened to be at Port Angeles. If you knew someone for that period of time would you tell them that you could do all of those things?" the teacher was asking.
Ivy snorted into her crossed arms and everyone turned to look at her.
"I'm sorry but is there something amusing?" the teacher asked Ivy.
"Of course there is! If i met a guy who hardly socialised with the school and then he laid that crap one me I would think that he needs the first ticket available to Arkham." Ivy stated as if everyone should know this.
"Like I said Miss Ivy, take it up with the debate team"
"Maybe I will", Ivy muttered into her arms. Eve looked over at her and smirked. This was better than TV for her.
"How in God's name did you 'happen' to have that book with you?" Ivy asked Eve using her fingers as quotation marks for 'happen' as they left the room and strode down the hallway towards geography.
"I USED to be a fan, I won't deny it, the movie just...I don't know" Eve said searching for words, "Opened my eyes, I admit I fancy one of the actors but I can also guarantee you that it is not Pattinson...I wonder who would be worse" Eve mused to herself.
"Worse than what?"
"Who would be worse, Pattinson or Bieber" Eve nearly sang to herself. Ivy chuckled at her a bit and punched her in the arm.
"I wonder what Gothamite geography is like...or American for that matter...I know my old Irish one was boring" Eve pondered.
"Mine was too, it's all the same really, and you study stuff turning into deserts, poor countries, volcanoes..." Ivy replied.
"I LIKE volcanoes and tornado's, I was raised to watch those movies it's just...my teacher put me to sleep and the other subjects we had to do were boring , I mean, how hard can it be to read a map?" Eve said as the two girls crossed the threshold to the classroom.
"You'd be surprised girls, take a seat"a voice said from behind them and they froze with looks of shock and slowly looked up to see the source of the voice which only caused their looks of shock to stay. The person was old so it was obvious that it was the geography teacher but he was GEORGEOUS! He took the phrase 'Tall dark and handsome' a bit TOO literally. He actually looked like Johnny Depp.
Eve had a goofy smile on her face and Ivy couldn't look at the guy straight in the eye. But she couldn't resist NOT looking at him so she was stuck glancing at him and back at the floor again until the two girls somehow managed to sit down in their seats.
"Alright class, dump your books and the floor and look up" the teacher said walking over to his desk and leaning against it nonchalantly which made the girls practically drool.
"Today let's be hippies! Oil is being the main cause for poor countries being exploited but it is also helping others to get rich. I am talking of course about the drilling of oil."
"You can drill me anytime you like" Ivy muttered, resting her head on her hand before realising that she had accidently said it aloud since everyone was looking at her.
"Pardon?" asked the teacher.
"Oh she means...you can er...drill her in on the 411 ya know? On facts and details and stuff?"
"Sure" the teacher said awkwardly before turning to put thing on the board.
"Why do you have to answer for her, she isn't a mute" said a red haired boy from another row of seats.
"I could be." Ivy muttered.
"No. You talk way too much." Eve laughed.
"BULLY!" Ivy yelled. "I'm being bullied! I'm being bullied! It's because I'm English! Racism! RACISM!"
"Ah England." The teacher smirked. "We are going to study England next week so why don't you tell us about it. Come up to the front."
"You're kidding me." Ivy muttered as she walked to the front of the class.
"Go Ivy!" Eve cheered.
"England is this place in Europe." Ivy said. "We speak English and do English things."
"Like drink tea?" A boy mocked.
"Yes." Ivy said. "But we also set things on fire. We set this boy on fire once and filmed it now it's somewhere on the internet. Also our men are hotter than yours."
"We have Johnny Depp!" Someone yelled.
"Matt Smith!" Ivy shot back.
"Leonardo Di'caprio!" A girl smiled.
"Daniel Craig."
"Zac Efron."
"Christian Bale, I win!" Ivy grinned.
"He's not English!" Eve pointed out.
"Yes he is!" Ivy nodded. "Even Google it!"
"I was thinking of you telling us about the geography side of England." The Teacher said.
"Oh, yeah, right." Ivy muttered. "So… England has trees and stuff. Once we owned a whole load of countries and stuff. The capital of England is London. I've been there twice. We had to go on the train which leant to one side every time we turned a corner and my friend got trapped in the bathroom."
"That's certainly… interesting." The teacher said. "You can sit down now."
00
"Homework?" Eve yelled. They had been home for about an hour and Eve was slowly realising that the idea of going to school wasn't all that fun.
"Stupid god damn clowns sending me to school!" She yelled. Ivy looked up from her homework and raised an eyebrow. "They think they're so good because they're…"
"Theatrical?" Ivy said.
"Yes! Theatrical! I'll give them theatrical!" Eve yelled as she walked over to her mp3 player which was plugged into the speakers.
"How d'you do, I see you've met my faithful handyman
He's just a little brought down because when you knocked
He thought you were the candy man." Eve sang in time with the music. Ivy's eyes widened and she quickly stood up when she realised that Eve was singing Sweet Transvestite from The Rocky Picture Show.
She began to walk towards Ivy was stumbled back towards the door.
"Don't get strung out by the way that I look,
Don't judge a book by its cover
I'm not much of a man by the light of day,
But by night I'm one hell of a lover
I'm just a Sweet Transvestite from Transsexual, Transylvania." Eve sang as she grabbed Ivy's arm as threw her on the bed.
"I'M GOING TO GET RAPED! HELP!" Ivy screamed. Eve rolled her eyes and skipped a couple songs on her mp3 player.
"SING WITH ME!" Eve ordered.
"Make me!" Ivy yelled back.
"Don't get strung out by the way that I look,
Don't judge a book by its cover
I'm not much of a man by the light of day,
But by night I'm one hell of a lover
I'm just a Sweet Transvestite from Transexual, Transylvania." Eve sang. Ivy leapt to her feet and began pounding her fists on the door.
"Let me out!" She screamed. "I can't take this insanity."
The door opened and Ivy ran out of the room without looking where she was going. The Joker stood there with a smirk as Ivy instantly hid behind him with her arms around his waist.
"Help me." She whispered.
"Oh clown!" Eve grinned. "I need to talk to you."
Ivy stayed behind The Joker glaring at her friend.
"I'm not going back to school. Ever. Again!" Eve growled.
"What are you going to do? Stay off school and drink alcohol? Isn't that what you Irish kids do?" The Joker chuckled.
"That's a stereotype, scar face." Eve laughed before realising what she had just called The Joker.
Ivy gasped and The Joker's hand went in his pocket.
"Oh crap." Eve muttered as The Joker pulled his switch blade out of the coat pocket.
"Dun dun dunnnn." Ivy muttered.