Things went smoother than I thought they would. For the most part.

Jake was pissed – at least until I told him that I would've done the same for him if he were as stupid as Edward. Well, and if I hadn't thought he was dead.

Alice and Esme thanked me repetitively for stopping Edward's attempts. They didn't have to- I did it mostly because I was selfish. I didn't want to lose my family even if I had already lost them. That made them even more thankful? Don't ask me – I don't get it.

Carlisle was thankful too but mostly amused at the entire situation.

Bella confused? Check.

Then he pointed out that the human they had told all of their secrets to had walked into Volterra, told the brothers everything, titled herself a princess, and then told them to PROTECT the Cullens. And they did.

Okay, so I see the backwardness of the entire situation. Technically they should have all died.

Puhlease.

Like I would let that happen?

Obviously not.

We were on our way back to the Cullen's house and I was still trying to determine my next victim. I wasn't ready to tell Edsty yet. Not like right-this-minute-yet anyway. Jasper would be in the first class we were going to today. He was already sufficiently freaked out so we could still have fun with it. He had been texting Alice repetitively since third block. This, since we said we would be back by second, made sense.

I LOVE Alice.

She oh-so-calmly wrote him back with a simple

AT FIRST BEACH. BE THERE BY FIFTH. REMEMBER: ROMME, EMLIE, AND EDSTY.

And left it at that.

Since then all of our phones had been ringing off the hook.

We were pulling in now to drop off Carlisle and Esme and go back to school. When we walked inside we all stopped when we noticed the little girl sitting on the couch with a bucket of popcorn.

Grrr.

"Seriously, Jane? Popcorn?" Nico said.

"Breaking and entering?" I said.

She shrugged and replied, "Dramatic effect. These three know I'm here, so might as well not be in a tree."

"Hello, Jane. I haven't seen you in quite a while." Carlisle, ever-welcoming, spoke up.

"Hey Carlisle, sorry I can't say the same. I've seen you plenty."

"So I'm told." Jane giggled while Nico and I rolled our eyes. "I see that you're eyes are gold now."

"I see your's are too genius." Jane said rudely without any offer of explanation. We all know she only did it for the job. It's a small sacrifice considering working for me is so much easier than being in Italy. They hardly had to work and they never had to report. The Cullen's never really got into trouble (except Edsty, who still tried on occasion) so it was basically freedom. With a huge paycheck. And shiny cars. And diamonds.

"Jane, respect Carlisle's home please. Do not speak to him like that again." I said, being all authoritative and stuff.

"Yes'm Master." She curtsied. She freaking curtsied me!

"Ugh, Jane. Just shut up please." I rolled my eyes while Nicole snickered in the background.

Carlisle interrupted, "Ladies, I shouldn't you be getting to school and messing with my son's heads?"

"Yes Master. School awaits," Jane said with a giggle, "Speaking of which, Bridget's up there right now. I suppose one of us will just enroll once all of this is out in the open?"

"Probably, we'll discuss it later." I said

"I'll do it!"

"No, Jane" Twin and I spoke together. We didn't even plan it this time.

"Why not?" She pouted.

"Because you hurt people for fun. Duh." Okay, that one we organized first.

And we left – telling Carlisle to feel free to send Jane away when she got to be too much.

UGH. Never liked Jane much. I do, however, like my Jane.

And her popcorn.