Italics indicate thinking

Herrs' POV

"Hmm." I sat at the table watching Darkness and Megumin play chess before bed.

"WAH Darkness that's no fair!" Megumin yelled.

"It's a legal move stop whining." I sighed taking a drink from a flask I had bought.

"Hey, Hey, Herrs what's in that?" Aqua asked.

"Nothing you can have." I said holding it over her head "You turn into a total loon when your drunk so you can't have any."

"No fair share~" she complained.

"I know you have your own secret stash keep your hands-off mine!" I yelled.

"Do all god like beings drink this much?" Darkness asked.

"It takes more to get us drunk that that's what you're asking, well except Aqua booze goes through her like water through a skeleton." I shrugged "But yeah it's pretty common for us to enjoy the drink."

"Hey Kazuma!" Aqua yelled to the boy sitting by the fire "Get up and give me your seat."

"Huh?"

"I'm level 21, the highest in the party." She bragged "Well not counting Herrs since he's been here for 600 years he doesn't really count. Now give up your spot nearest the fireplace to your superior."

"Now I use my teleport!" Megumin moved a piece to the other end of the board.

"Hey, that's not fair." Darkness huffed.

"Megumin don't cheat." I sighed looking off.

Aqua has her hair down for bed…I forgot how cute she can be with that style, and those PJs hug her just right.

The Next Day

"Oi Kazuma?" I pointed as he and I walked through town "Don't you know those two guys?"

"What are you two doing?" Kazuma asked walking up to them.

They were two guys from the guild Keith and Dust, Keith is the taller one with black hair and Dust is the shorter one with blonde hair, they're in a party with another guy called Taylor and a cute girl named Lean. Apparently Kazuma had become friends with them, me on the other hand…I despise men they gross and not sexy at all, Lean though I could get friendly with her for sure.

"You two are too jumpy, and you're standing in front of a dark alley asking for trouble." I looked past them "Oh, you're at This Place."

"This place?" Kazuma asked.

"A secret little alcove for Male Adventurers." I told him "It's better known as the Succubi Dream Shop."

"Tell me more." Kazuma said sternly.

"You three are boys after my own heart." I laughed "Basically you go down there, make an appointment with the Succubi and they'll come and give you a "Nice" dream, they get to absorb your energy and you get to relieve some pent up…stress that you couldn't otherwise relieve in the presence of a camp with female party members if you catch the drift."

"I see so you've used it many times." Keith nodded.

"Nope not even once." I shook my head.

"But you're like the most well known perv in the town!" Dust yelled.

"It is odd." Kazuma looked at me.

"Well Kazuma, give what you know about me you should understand that the Succubi wouldn't be able to handle someone like me, if they tried to absorb my energies…well…" I spread my hands "Poof, internal combustion. So it's best I not mess around with the demons."

I waved "You three have fun though, just remember not to let them take too much or you won't wake up from that dream."

Later

"Wow free food." I sat at the table "Darkness your family rocks!"

Darkness Family had sent us a punch of crabs as thanks for taking care of her and as a housewarming gift, I don't know where they had the money to afford all this but I wasn't gonna complain.

"Super High Grade Red Crab!" Aqua cheered "And it came with this awesome high label liquor!"

"Share with me." I held my glass out.

"I don't wanna!" she hugged the bottle.

"I have never been happier to be in this party than today!" Megumin clapped "I would hold in an explosion all day if it meant eating this crab!"

"HAA!" Aqua smiled breaking and eating a leg "Yummy."

"I haven't had this stuff in decades." I hummed snapping a leg "Normally I hate crabs, but they're fine at the dinner table."

"We're eating." Aqua glared.

"WOW!" Kazuma yelled eating a leg and instantly grabbing another.

"Slow down or you're gonna choke." I sighed.

"Kazuma pay attention I'm going to teach you the best way to eat this crab." Aqua picked up her bottle "First you get a fire, then you take the shell and pill it with the inside parts, you fill the shell with this stuff and then boil it and Ta-dah!"

Aqua picked up the crab head "It's like amazing stew."

"Now your teaching your secret drinking techniques." I laughed with a leg hanging in my mouth like a cigar "How the mighty have fallen."

"Why you-."

"Hey what does it taste like let me try." Megumin begged.

"It's not for minors like you." I tipped the shell back "HAA!"

"Come on just a little~." She pouted.

"Besides there's no way a little Loli like you can handle something this strong." I rolled my eyes "I mean look, it's already running through Aqua."

"WEEE!" the Goddess cheered waving her arms "Heat up faster~"

"See if you start drinking at this age you'll melt your brain and end up like her." I pointed out.

"WAHA!" Aqua crashed into me.

"You're a terrible influence." I sighed.

"Herrs~." She pouted laying on top of me "Get me more~"

"You've had plenty." I pushed her up.

"Boo!" she softly punched me "Meanie."

"Come on." I held her wrists "Stop it, it's annoying when you get like this."

We all stayed up a little while longer, Kazuma turned in early but soon it was dark and the crab was mostly gone.

"HEE!" Aqua cheered softly as I carried her to her room.

"You're such a pain." I rolled my eyes "At least you didn't try and drag me into a drinking contest like you used to."

I pushed the door to her room open and dropped Aqua on the bed.

"There, now sleep it off-WAH!"

The girl grabbed my hood and yanked it off, not only exposing my face but dropping me onto the bed with her.

"Herrs~." She smiled "You're still…really handsome."

I blinked a bit and looked down at her.

"Aqua…"

"Hmm." She suddenly hugged me "Be my pillow."

"Ugh." I groaned as she squeezed me tight "Ow, not…romantic at all."

"SNORE!" she immediately passed out.

"I can't tell if this is a romantic moment at all anymore!" I yelled trying to squirm free.

"HMPH~" Aqua threw her leg up and over mine.

"Haa…" I laid my head back and sighed "We haven't been this close in a long time have we?"

Aqua just mumbled in her sleep.

"Sometimes I miss nights like this, just the two of us, together relaxing." I smiled sadly before smirked "But your boobs are kinda pressed against my arm so it's a total win-win!"

"HM?!" Aqua's eyes shot open.

Crap she heard me!

"There's someone here!" she jumped out of bed.

"What?" I pulled my hood up "Get back here you drunk."

"I'm serious!" she ran into the hall.

"What's all the yelling?" Megumin walked out of her room rubbing her eyes.

"Intruder!" Aqua yelled pointing at a girl on the gerund "See, she's in the traps I have set up!"

"Why do you have sigil traps in our house?" I groaned walking up "Huh, it's a succubus."

She probably came because Kazuma booked her, but since Aqua has these anti-demon traps she got stuck before she could get to his room…well I'll have to work our way outta this carefully, poor thing looks scared out of her mind too.

"Aqua!" Kazuma stormed out "What are you screaming for?!"

"AHH Crazy man in a towel!" the blue haired woman yelled.

"You could have at least put pants on…pervert." I sighed.

"I'll exorcise her right away!" Aqua yelled.

"HMPH!" Kazuma stood in front of Aqua and looked at the demon girl "Run away."

"Huh, but she came to steal your vitality." Aqua said.

"Oh so she couldn't have been here to take mine?" I asked.

"Shut up who'd want your nasty lifeforce." She glared.

"HEY!"

I can play along here and help this girl…and hopefully not embarrass Kazuma either.

"She must have charmed him." I smirked "Poor Kazuma doesn't know any better. Oh well I guess we'll just have to kill him and then I'll be the only male in the mansion, what a shame."

"HEY!" Kazuma yelled.

"Just let the girl leave, she didn't hurt anyone." I shrugged "And she's kinda cute."

"There's no way a Goddess like me can let a devil live." Aqua glared "I already let you spare that stupid lich I won't let you save some demon because they have big boobs or a cute face again!"

"What are you my mother?" I groaned.

"I might as well be with how juvenile you act, I'm pretty sure your brain never left puberty you pervert!"

"Says the only Goddess I know that gets drunk at the drop of a hat!" I snapped back.

"Uh guys." Megumin tugged our arms "She's trying to break free."

"GOOD!" "CRAP!" Aqua and I yelled.

"Accursed Succubus!" Darkness stormed out in her nightgown "Putting my though such humiliation by charming Kazuma…I'LL KILL YOU!"

"Herrs move Kazuma." Aqua said.

"I don't want to." I huffed.

"Haa…Herrs." She put on a pout "Please~ I'll pay you at the first level"

"Sorry bro you're outta luck." I shrugged "Aqua's got you beat on this one, I just can't resist that face."

"TOTAL PUSSOVER!" Megumin yelled.

"Just be lucky he accepted my face as payment and didn't demand level two." Aqua sighed.

"Level two?" Megumin asked "What's that?"

"I'll tell you when you're older." Aqua patted her head.

Level two…damn I should help out till I could get her to flash me the goods.

"Alright." I rolled my shoulder "Get outta the way Kazuma, or this is gonna hurt."

"You spineless man." He glared "And you call yourself a pervert."

"Hahaha…" I smirked "At least I haven't wasted my money."

"HMPH!" he jumped at me.

"Oh come on did you think you could hit me with that." I side stepped him like it was nothing and grabbed his arm to take him down.

"Crap the Succubus flew away!" Aqua hissed "Way to go Herrs you moron!"

"You told me to get Kazuma not the Succubus." I rolled my eyes "Now pay up."

"Tsk, fine…"

I leaned forward and she kissed my cheek "There."

"Thanks." I smiled "Pleasure doing business with you Aqua."

"Tsk." She looked off "Creep."

The Next Day

"Sometimes I really hate you." Aqua huffed sitting at the table for lunch with me.

"I could say the same about you." I shrugged.

We were both quiet for a bit.

"You know you don't have to pout like that, you can just ask me." I mumbled "I'll always do things for you."

"I know." She said softly "That's just…the kinda guy you are."

"Hmph." I laughed a bit "You know somedays I really can't stand you, but some other day…I wish it was like it used to be."

"Yeah, me too…" she stood up "But it can't be like that, not anymore."

"It could be…if you wanted it to." I said.

"Tsk, you already tried that line a few weeks ago in the graveyard." She smirked leaning towards me "I won't fall for it again."

"Right." I laughed a bit and leaned towards her "That joke…won't work twice."

*DONG*

"Hmm." Aqua and I both separated from our little flirting thing when we heard the towns alarm going off.

"DESTROYER!" the Alarm buzzed "The Mobile Fortress Destroyer is coming?!"

"What?" I stood up.

"I thought it stays away from here by miles." Aqua looked at m.

"Somethings wrong." I jumped out the window "Let's hurry, and Aqua"

"Hmm?"

"This is serious." I looked back up at the window "I'll be going all out if I have to."

"Right." She nodded.

AN

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