Chapter 10 - Is It Ever Too Late
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I hope that you all enjoy reading this chapter as much as I enjoyed writing it.
It was completely dark outside when Robert reluctantly decided he had better return to campus for the night. After all he did have much study to catch up on. Edith offered her carriage and Robert accepted as he had no desire to trek across London in the dark of night.
Robert bid a polite farewell to everyone. He had a special glint in his eye as he said a special goodbye to Maria, ashamedly showing his affection for her with a lingering kiss of her hand. This was despite Margaret and John watching the interaction with close scrutiny. His continued defiance infuriated John, and as Robert walked outside to the carriage he was promptly followed.
It had been a few minutes since Robert walked out the front door and Maria had not heard the sound of the carriage depart. So she decided that she wished to peak out the window and see Robert off. She quietly opened the front window and peered through a gap in the curtains to watch him leave. However as Maria glanced outside taking in the fresh air she could hear Mr Thornton and Robert arguing.
"What are you thinking?" John spoke with a raised tone. His eyes stone cold as he looked on his nephew.
"I cannot help the way I feel". Robert spoke almost pleading with his uncle, imploring him to understand.
"The way you feel?" John laughed at the suggestion that Robert had legitimate feelings for Maria and continued. "You do not know how you feel...I will not allow you to throw away everything, for some girl who is nothing…nothing more than a distraction".
Maria's eyes widened and her stomach sank hearing Mr Thornton's cruel words. His words some girl who is nothing, nothing more than a distraction circled through her mind as if on repeat.
For a moment Robert looked at his uncle in disbelief, trying to figure out how he could make his uncle understand.
Out of desperation Robert blurted out "I think I love her". His eyes were earnest and he meant what he said.
John looked at his nephew and knew he spoke from his heart. He took a deep breath before continuing.
"You may think you love that girl right now, but feelings change. If you jeopardise your studies for the first skirt that has thrown you attention you will regret it for the rest of your life".
John looked at Robert and took another deep breath. He decided it was time for some tough love. It was time to school him on his behaviour earlier in the day.
"However what troubles me is not only your disregard for your studies but the way you two were carrying on in the drawing room earlier. That was completely inappropriate!".
Robert openly scoffed at his uncle which angered John. John slightly tilted his head and narrowed his eyes. He knew he had to be harsh to make Robert think about the consequences of his actions.
"Do you want her to get the reputation of being the town bike? Because that is exactly what will happen in you continue with these rendezvous. I must also question the integrity of a young girl who gives her love so easily".
In that moment, Maria's jaw dropped and she knew that she had heard too much. Mr Thornton was making his thoughts about her well and truly clear. He saw her as nothing, nothing more than a distraction. As a skirt who was throwing herself at Robert with no integrity. That Robert would regret his affections and would change his mind.
Maria quickly fled the scene and ran upstairs into her room. By chance Margaret caught sight of Maria running up the stairs, seeing the tears streaming down her face and hearing her muffled sobs. Margaret followed immediately to find out what on earth had upset her daughter.
Margaret stopped at Maria's room and quietly knocked on the door.
"Come in" Maria said quietly with a sniffle.
Margaret cautiously entered the room and looked upon her daughter who had thrown herself onto her bed dramatically with her head covered by a pillow. Her sobs where muffled by the pillow but the pain behind them was obvious to Margaret.
Margaret sat on Maria's bed and rubbed her back trying to sooth her.
"What is wrong my darling girl?" Margaret's voice was tender and loving.
Maria peeked out from under the pillow and looked up at her mother, red eyed but temporarily gaining some composure. "I overheard a conversation between Robert and Mr Thornton". Maria broke down into tears again, Mr Thornton's words revolving around her head.
"Oh… whatever you heard… surely it was not that bad".
Maria recounted the conversation that she overheard as she hugged her mother and buried her head in her shoulder.
Margaret listened silently, just rubbing Maria's back and focusing as best she could on comforting her. However the more Maria told her the more her maternal instincts were kicking in. She was now officially in defence mode. How dare someone trivialise her daughter like that. How dare HE speak about her in such a fashion! How dare he question Maria's integrity!
After sitting and listening for some twenty minutes, Maria was finally calming down. Margaret bestowed some wise words to her daughter.
"Maria, you cannot control what other people do or say. The only thing you can control is your actions and whether you let people's words affect you. You are a talented, intelligent, generous, kind person. Anyone who truly knows you, also knows that you do have integrity. Don't let one person's words disarm you so".
Margaret reached to her daughter and affectionately swept the displaced mass of dark hair from her face to behind her ears, revealing Maria's face.
"This afternoon was not your finest moment. I will admit that. I do not want that to happen again".
Maria silently nodded in response, still with a sombre look on her face although the tears had cleared.
"I will leave you to your thoughts now my darling".
Margaret kissed Maria on the forehead
"I love you more than anything in the whole world. Always remember that".
"I love you too".
With that, Margaret walked out of Maria's room and closed the door. Now she was out of Maria's sight she could truly allow herself to feel outraged at Mr Thornton's words. She could feel herself trembling and glowing red from anger. How dare someone speak about her daughter in such a fashion….
In a forthright manner Margaret marched downstairs in search of the offending tongue. She went from room to room systematically. Eventually she made her way into the drawing room where John was alone, standing by the fireplace looking deep in thought.
John looked up as he heard Margaret enter. While John's face relaxed upon seeing Margaret, she did not give him a second to say or do anything.
"Who do you think you are?" Margaret said accusingly. Her eyes stone cold looking him up and down in disgust, her lips were pursed and her hands were on her hips.
"I do not know what you mean?". To say John was caught off guard was an understatement. He had no idea what Margaret was talking about and why she was so agitated (seemingly with him).
"My daughter heard every word you spoke to your nephew and I have spent the last half hour comforting her".
"Oh…." John certainly did not expect that.
"I understand that their behaviour left a lot to be desired today, but your words about her were cruel. My daughter is not a distraction".
This was the very discussion that John wanted to never occur. He went to open his mouth but he was unable to get anything out before Margaret continued.
"You speak like she is some harlot throwing herself at your nephew. Whatever is between them, they deem to be real and it appears to be mutual".
At this point, John did not wish to be lectured too and scoffed in retaliation. "Robert doesn't know where his passion lies. I will not allow him to lose everything he has worked for because his mind is preoccupied".
Margaret eyed him off "Surely a young person should have the right to follow their passion, where ever that may lead them?"
At this point John lost control. He allowed a deep seeded venom creep up his throat and before he knew it, he spat out words that were personal and went for Margaret's jugular. "Yes well some people are all too happy to follow a foolish passion and disregard the consequences, their reputation, their family…..".
John could hardly believe what he had said. He was thinking about the past, about the train station, how as a youth Margaret publicly disregarded her reputation.
Margaret eyes widened as his words hit her like a tone of bricks. She knew exactly what he was referring too. This argument had just turned into something completely different. Instead of correcting John in that moment, she chose to fight fire with fire.
"Let's not forget there are also those who declare their passion one minute and then change their mind at the drop of a hat. It leads one to believe that there was never any real passion there to begin with".
Margaret continued as her emotions buried for 18 years snowballed out of control "and here is something I bet you didn't even consider John Thornton. The man at the train station was not my lover, he was my brother, however you instantly thought the worst of me despite me pleading that things were not as they seemed".
Margaret lowered her eyes, the emotion swept over her like a tidal wave. These were repressed words that finally had found their voice. However now they were spoken, she had no idea what to do, she could not hide or take them back. She just stood there motionless, a single tear rolled down her cheek.
John was once again in absolute shock. He was surprised, relieved and ashamed all at once. 'He was her brother' he thought to himself. In that moment John knew that he would not allow his true feelings to be silenced this time. He took a step towards Margaret who was purposefully looking in the opposite direction from him, avoiding his gaze. He looked down at her and cleared his throat before speaking softly.
"Well here is something you do not expect. When I said that my love for you was over that day…. I misled you. I was consumed by jealousy at the thought of you with someone else. I behaved beyond poorly".
John stepped closer to Margaret's person again. He leant down and whispered in her ear, his deep voice trembling. "But know this Margaret, more than anything in the world, I never stopped loving you…. not for one second".
His breath against her neck as he spoke sent delicious shivers throughout her whole body. John brought his hand up gently to Margaret's cheek, trying to coax her to look at him. He looked down at her tenderly.
Gradually Margaret brought her tear glazed eyes from the floor meet John's. His eyes were full of passion and she knew in that moment that he spoke the truth. It was like the sudden ignition of a flame within both of their souls that had long been denied.
He gently placed a tender soft kiss on Margaret's lips, his hands on her waist, drawing her towards him, until there was practically no space between them. Her hands tentatively reached up to his strong arms, resting on his broad shoulders. His kisses grew more passionate and Margaret reciprocated the passion. They were hungry kisses, starved of affection.
However in that moment, Margaret's mind snapped. What was she doing she thought to herself? In that instant Margaret's mind took over from her heart and she panicked pushing John away. "I… I….. I really must go".
As quickly as the passionate encounter had started, it finished. Margaret fled the scene as quickly as she could. A pink blush descended from her face to her neck as she fled and headed for her room mind racing, not able to think straight. Meanwhile John was left standing there red faced, not quite sure exactly what had just happened or why Margaret had run away.