Our Fate is Red
Summary: Everyone in the world is tied to their soulmate by the "Red String of Fate" tied around their little finger. Ian and Mickey had been connected in that way since birth, but before they could meet, Mickey was so scared of being gay that he dug deep into his skin and severed the string. The string doesn't connect them anymore, but fate still has a way of bringing people together. Soulmate!AU
Disclaimer: I don't own Shameless.
I listened to "Star Crossed" by Scary Kids Scaring Kids a lot while writing this chapter, because the lyrics "I won't give up my love so that fate can have its way. If the stars say that you couldn't love me are you telling me that you would listen?" fit Ian's thoughts pretty well.
Here's the chapter you've all been waiting for! The very beginning of all the drama, at least. Only 3 more chapters after this!
Chapter 10 – Realization
Ian couldn't stop thinking about kissing Mickey. He'd kissed other guys before and it felt great, but those times paled in comparison.
Kissing Mickey was like finally getting a breath of fresh air after a long time of choking to death. The air around them sparked and pulsed with life the minute their lips touched. So many emotions flowed through Ian that he wasn't even sure if they had all originally belonged to him. It was like he could tell what Mickey was thinking and feeling through touch. He loved it.
Mickey loved it too, but he hated it at the same time. In some ways, it confirmed everything that he'd ever been scared of. Kissing Ian felt like being connected to a soulmate again. To Mickey, that was the equivalent of feeling like a scared little child. It terrified him.
For days after the first time they kissed, Mickey kept coming back for more. Kissing became a necessary part of their routine, but even still, Mickey never talked about it. He pretended like nothing between them had changed.
Ian was glad that things between them finally seemed to be moving past "friendship," but Mickey's silence only made him more restless. All he could think about was the pain he'd went through with Roger. The possibility of Mickey eventually leaving him for his real soulmate nagged at him more than ever. There were so many questions that he wanted to ask. So many things just needed to be said.
"Hey! You better fuckin' put those back before I crack your skull open on the pavement!"
Ian was startled out of his daze by Mickey's loud voice. They were both at the Kash and Grab, and Ian was supposed to be restocking the shelves, but he'd gotten distracted.
The guy that Mickey had shouted at dropped the candy he'd been trying to steal and ran out of the store.
"Uh… thanks, Mickey," Kash muttered meekly.
Mickey just shrugged. "Add it to the paycheck," he said. Mickey had come to the Kash and Grab to see Ian so often that he'd managed to intimidate Kash into giving him a job working security. Anytime he stopped a robbery, Kash paid him a little bit of money. It wasn't much, but it was a way to pass the time while he hung around during Ian's shift.
Ian bent over, reaching for some of the cans on the lowest shelf. Kash's eyes immediately went toward his ass. Admittedly, Mickey took a moment to stare as well, but he turned back around just in time to catch Kash in the act.
Even as the older man walked toward the back room and out of view, he could barely tear his eyes away. Mickey wrinkled his nose in disgust.
"Your boss is a fuckin' pedo, dude," Mickey grumbled as soon as he was out of ear shot.
Ian looked up and frowned. "What are you talking about?"
Mickey motioned toward the back room. "That asshole over there keeps staring at you. It's gross."
Ian laughed out loud in disbelief. "He's married, Mick. With kids!"
"So?" Mickey sneered. "Trust me, he would bend over for you in a second if you asked."
"No, he wouldn't," Ian protested.
"Yeah, maybe cause he knows I would beat his faggot ass if he even tried," Mickey growled possessively.
Ian smirked and raised an eyebrow. Mickey was acting just like he had the day he beat up Roger. "Someone sounds jealous."
Mickey paused, unable to come up with a retort. "… fuck off."
"Admit it," Ian teased. "You're jealous. You like me."
"Seriously. Fuck off," Mickey grumbled back.
"You kissed me," Ian pointed out.
Mickey didn't say anything. He turned around and started helping Ian restock the shelves, just to have something distracting to do.
"You do like me, right?" Ian asked, softer that time. "Like… in a soulmate way?"
Mickey spun around. "Enough with the freakin' soulmate crap!" he shouted.
"You can't ignore it forever, Mick!" Ian insisted.
His mind ran a million miles a minute. He wanted Mickey to admit his feelings so that he could finally convince himself that he was doing the right thing. He felt bad about stealing Mickey from whoever he was connected to, but something in him wanted to be selfish, no matter who else got hurt in the process. Maybe, if Mickey could decide his own fate like he said, they really could be together in the end. At least, that's what Ian hoped.
"I don't have a soulmate!" Mickey shouted.
His words hung in the air. Ian's heart skipped a beat and all of his thoughts and theories came to a complete stop.
"What?" he murmured. "How… how does that even happen?"
Mickey sighed in defeat. He might as well say it. Maybe then Ian would realize that Mickey wasn't worth it, and they could just move on with their lives before either of them got any more attached.
"When I was a kid, I found a way to break the string." He showed Ian the scar that was barely visible under his tattoo.
Ian was horrified. "That's possible?" he asked quietly. "But… what about your soulmate?"
"Who the fuck knows?" Mickey muttered. "They're not my problem anymore."
Ian was quiet. "I… I don't get it. Why did you-?"
"Jesus Christ! Enough with the 20 questions!" Mickey spat bitterly. "I don't hear you telling me about your soulmate."
Ian hesitated. "… That's cause I don't have one either," he finally admitted quietly.
Mickey hadn't expected that. "The fuck are you talking about? Of course you do."
"I think he died," Ian explained softly. "He was in so much pain, and then one night he was just gone. Every guy I've been with since just… hasn't been the one. They all had someone else."
Mickey's eyes lit up with understanding. He finally got why Ian was so obsessive about soulmates. "You never fuckin' mentioned that before," he mumbled defensively.
A smile spread across Ian's face. "Yeah, but… don't you see? Everyone else has a soulmate, but you don't. I don't either. Isn't that sort of like fate?"
Mickey realized what Ian was trying to imply, and he took a step back. "I don't give a shit about fate, okay? Fuck!"
"Mickey, come on…"
The shorter boy shook his head violently, and with a flash of absolute fear in his eyes, he was out the door in an instant. Ian was tempted to go after him, but Kash walked back into the room before he could even move.
"Something happen?" Kash asked curiously.
"No," Ian muttered. He went back to work.
More than ever, he was sure that he and Mickey were meant to be together. He didn't have to worry about taking Mickey away from anyone anymore. Mickey was all his.
The connection between them couldn't have just been something that he'd made up in his head. Ever since they'd kissed, something had ignited in him. Right down to his biology, he felt it. His whole body was still warm from Mickey's presence, especially his pinky…
Suddenly, Ian's eyes went wide. He looked down at his little finger, examining it closely for the first time since he was a child. The short, dangling string hung there where it had always been, but instead of the faded color he remembered, it glowed and pulsed dark red. He'd never noticed it acting like that before.
He instantly knew that it was because of Mickey. The other boy made something in him react, just like soulmates were supposed to. It was exactly like what he'd felt as a kid. Exactly… like it…
Slowly, it all fell into place. Maybe Ian's soulmate wasn't dead after all. Maybe he'd just been a scared little kid who severed his own string by the name of Mickey Milkovich.