Hi there, everyone! I once again apologize for this very late update! I had a full-time summer job, so I didn't have much time for writing, but now *thankfully* it's over and I have two more weeks before university starts-which means I'm going to be focusing on finishing this story. :)
Anyways, I would like to thank my beta-reader, Vampire Maddy, for looking over this chapter-believe me, if she didn't help me edit it, you would be reading a lot of weird and confusing stuff. Ha-ha. But seriously, I'm very grateful of her assistance. ;)
Oh yeah, heads-up, there will be four new (minor) characters in this chapter, but don't worry, they're harmless unless you think they are. ;)
Disclaimer: I do not own Vampire Knight.
Chapter 10: Jealousy
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"Step, step, step. Now skip, turn, and step." Michiru's strict voice echoed through the music room. She clapped her hands to the rhythm of the waltz. "So far, so good. Keep it up, Yuuki-sama." She watched the youngest pureblood dance with her son.
For the last couple of hours, Yuuki had been struggling to learn the dance that she would have to perform at her soiree which was approaching in less than two weeks. Normally, she would be capable of dancing to what Michiru would call an 'acceptable' standard but today was not her day. She had unintentionally stepped on Hanabusa's foot several times.
She wasn't sure why she was not at ease, but she sensed the possibility that Hanabusa was intentionally avoiding direct eye contact with her. There had been a maladroit atmosphere between them ever since the incident that occurred in his bedroom.
They no longer talked like they used to or read and criticized books together. She felt that she has lost her dear childhood friend…
"Okay," Michiru suddenly interrupted when she saw Yuuki bump into Hanabusa again. "That's enough, darling." She didn't want to see any more physical damage caused to her poor son. She gestured her hand at her daughter to cease the music from the piano. "Let's call it a day, shall we? Thank you for your hard work children."
Michiru's daughter nodded her head and stood up to exit the room, knowing that her mother wanted to speak with Yuuki privately. Hanabusa had got the signal too and reluctantly let go of Yuuki's hand. He forced a small smile to form on his lips and kept his eyes averted.
Once the two young Aidous had left, Michiru approached Yuuki with a frown upon her face. Yuuki mentally braced herself for the long lectures that she expected Michiru to give her on how her dancing skills had deteriorated.
"Is there something bothering you, Yuuki-sama?" Michiru asked, lifting Yuuki's chin with the crook of her finger. "You are usually attentive when you dance."
"I don't know," Yuuki replied, before exhaling tiredly."Maybe I'm just too nervous… I'm afraid that I will disappoint you at the soiree."
"And, why is that?"
"Well, you have taught me so much and spent a tremendous time preparing me for it." Yuuki started, entwining her fingers as if she was praying. "I'm perturbed at the fact that, what if everything does not go smoothly on that night? What if I make a careless mistake? Such as forgetting my dance steps or saying something wrong? How will others react to it?" She bombarded the questions at her guardian. "I don't want to bring disgrace to my family or yours…" Her voice trailed off.
"Oh, my dear." Michiru said quietly, before extending her arms towards Yuuki for a quick encouraging hug. "Yuuki," she unconsciously dropped the honorific title, "Do not worry so much. I know you will make an elegant entry." Michiru withdrew her hands and grinned. "You're very sweet and sensible. A princess who is lovable in every way... I'm positive that everybody will absolutely adore you."
Yuuki smiled as she listened to every word that Michiru was saying. It was rare to hear such compliments and praises from her strict etiquette teacher. In these endearing moments, Michiru reminded Yuuki of her own mother. Juuri always managed to cheer Yuuki up whenever she was feeling sad or having low self-esteem.
"Thank you," Yuuki softly said, "For everything."
"No thank you, for being an excellent student." Michiru replied humbly. "It has been an honor to be given the opportunity to serve you." She then took Yuuki's hands and patted them. "Oh, yes. Before I forget, I received a phone call earlier saying that Takuma will be coming in today."
Hearing her first friend's name, Yuuki's face immediately brightened up. "Really? Takuma is on his way?" she asked excitingly. It had been such a long time since she'd last seen him.
"Yes, and he will be staying with us until your soiree takes place."
"Good evening!" a cheerful voice greeted the two ladies.
Yuuki's head turned to the source of the voice and beamed at the young man standing at the grand archway of the room. She wanted to dash towards him and be given a big hug, but she knew better to do so when Michiru is present as she would get scolded for being too intimated with the opposite gender.
"Ah, speak of the devil." Michiru muttered.
Takuma walked into the room and lowered his head slightly to show some courtesy. "And how are you, madam?"
"Fine, thank you. And how was the journey? Long?" Michiru asked casually.
"Quite long, but it was expected. The weather was pleasant unlike the previous day when it has rained constantly," Takuma answered.
Michiru nodded her head and replied, "I see. Well, I'll leave you two alone to catch up on your lives. I shall talk to you later when we have tea time."
Yuuki watched Michiru deliberately exit the room and down the corridor. She did not move as she waited for Michiru to be out of their hearing range.
"Ah, so am I getting the cold shoulder, my princess?" Takuma jokingly asked, folding his arms across his chest. "No welcome hug? No warm smile? Whatever did I do to offend you to behave in such a manner?"
"For not visiting me often," she purposefully pouted.
"My apologies then. I should have visited you more, but I was held captive by my grandfather."
"Against your will?" she asked, skeptically raising an eyebrow at him.
"Half and half."
"Hmm…always the evil one's doing," she muttered and puffed her cheeks as she thought how Ichiou had kept her brother from seeing her.
Takuma was amused by Yuuki's nickname for his grandfather and grinned politely. He was even tempted to run over to her and embrace her when he saw how she puffed her cheeks in such a cute childish demeanor. She was simply adorable.
"So… do I get a hug?" he asked, sheepishly. He knew that hugging the princess would hold the risk of being interrogated by his omniscient best friend, but if she granted him the permission then he could use that as an excuse.
"Certainly." She kindly smiled and skipped over to his side.
He leant his torso forward and extended his arms as she approached him. Placing his arms around her back, he lifted her up off her feet for a playful hug. They both laughed as he had spun her around.
"Your hugs are always… so special," she commented when he had ended the hug. "Very fun."
"Why, thank you! I try to make them as interesting as possible," he replied modestly.
"Anyways, we must catch up on our lives!" she suddenly exclaimed. "I haven't seen you for ages and surely you must have tons of intriguing stories to tell me, no?" She eagerly glanced up at him. "I would like to hear more information about Cross Academy and the humans."
Takuma chuckled at her and responded: "Shouldn't you worry about your soiree more than Cross Academy? But, anyhow, didn't Kaname-sama update you with the progress on Cross Academy?"
"No… he is too busy," She lied, not wanting to admit she still refused to communicate with her brother. "He barely has any time for me."
"I see, I see." He noticed her expression changed when he mentioned her brother, but he did not dare to interfere with the pureblood's affairs. "Then, as your knight, I shall share my knowledge on that subject with you."
Yuuki giggled and reminisced back to the day when Takuma gave himself that title. Takuma had told her that since he could never be her prince charming, he would be her gallant knight. He would be loyal to her and carry out duties for her.
"Yes, I would be pleased if you did."
"We should head over to the library or garden to talk then." He took Yuuki's hand and tucked it in the crook of his arm. He then began to lead the way but a few minutes later he stopped dead in his tracks when he saw his best friend waiting for him at the doorway.
"Oh, hello Kaname-sama," Takuma plastered a smile on his face to hide any shock. He had attempted to separate himself from Yuuki, but she had prevented it by clinging onto his arm. Obviously, she did not see what was wrong with them linking arms as they were only friends.
"Takuma," Kaname greeted while eyeing their arms suspiciously. He then turned to acknowledge his sister. "Yuuki."
"Onii-sama," her tone of voice lacked the usual warmness she had for him and she inclined her head.
"Where are you two off to?"
"To the library," she answered and tilted her head to one side, "Takuma will be telling me about the journeys he had been through."
"I see." Kaname did not know what else to say as the familiar silence fell upon them. He then suddenly remembered an event and decided to bring it up. "That reminds me, Madeleine and William Cavendish will arrive in a couple of days. Do you know who they are?"
"Yes, the Cavendish family is one of the remaining seven pureblood families. They are arriving from England." She gave the information that Michiru had kept emphasizing over the past month. "And I must show them my gratitude for coming as they rarely attend events such as my soiree." She then quickly darted her eyes to meet her brother's and asked: "May I go now?"
Seeing there was no point to continue the conversation, Kaname gave a half-smile and stood aside for them to pass through. He silently watched as Yuuki lightly pulled Takuma's arm to indicate that they should leave. In response, Takuma cordially smiled and bid a small goodbye at his best friend before leading his partner out of the room.
It would be a lie if Kaname didn't admit that he was privately jealous of how close Takuma and Yuuki had become. Even though he knew that nothing romantic was happening between the two, he couldn't help but have the fear that he could lose her to another male vampire.
The thought of having a strained relationship with his Yuuki had never crossed his mind until these last few nights. He was always confident that he would remain the most important person in her life and she would never ignore him… Had his long absence not made her heart grow fonder, but rather frigid?
He ran his fingers through his dark brown hair and let out a heavy sigh. He didn't know how or why, but her avoidance of him had somehow caused disturbance in his heart. Why should such a small matter bother him? After all, he was the powerful ancestor of the Kurans who was awakened from his deep slumber and placed into this current body. Whilst he was not sure why he was awakened or what was his mission in this second life, the one thing he was positive of was that he wasn't exactly Yuuki's true brother. He wasn't just Kaname.
So why should he have to play the role of Yuuki's brother? He wasn't obliged to.
Was it because of Juuri and Haruka? He pitied for them losing their only son? Or was it because of Yuuki?
Ah, that must be it. It must be her... it was always her since he couldn't stop thinking about her or all the things she said.
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Closing the door to Kaname's bedroom, Yuuki breathed out heavily and smoothed the creases on her dress. She couldn't believe that she once again had given in to drinking his blood! She sometimes wondered if she had become addicted to his blood. Every time she drank it she found herself indulging in pure pleasure. Could it simply be that as she hasn't tasted blood for such a long time, she missed the sensation and wanted to savor every moment of it? Either way she had realized, no matter how hard she tries to ignore or avoid her beloved brother, her heart still yearns for him.
"What a strange feeling," she said to no one in particular. She then decided to forget about the new feeling and sauntered down the long hallway.
"Yuuki-sama!" a small childish voice called out.
She perked up at the sight of a dark blue haired little boy, waving his hand as he stood at the end of the hallway. The small bow on the boy's sailor outfit bounced as he ran eagerly towards her.
"Kiyoto!" she cried happily, kneeling down to hug Hanabusa's nephew. Kiyoto giggled as she embraced him and picked him up in the air.
"Oh, how is my favorite little boy doing?" she inquired, once he had stopped laughing.
"Je ne suis pas très bien," Kiyoto replied in French, puffing his cheeks. He was showing off his knowledge of foreign language which was typical for a boy who had Aidou's blood running through his veins.
"Pourquoi?" she questioned in French.
"Because of my sister," he crossed his arms across his chest.
"And what has she done?"
"Everybody is paying attention to her and not to me," he said, flapping his arms in a whiny way.
"And now you're feeling like you are being ignored?"
He only nodded his head in response.
"Well, Kiyoto, she is just a baby." Yuuki explained gently. "That is why she needs lots of attention and people to look after her. She is not at the stage where she can walk on her own or talk in foreign language—like you, my little monsieur."
Hearing a small praise from the pureblood, Kiyoto instantly beamed up at her.
"Don't worry, Kiyoto. I'm positive that your family is not neglecting you—and if they dare to—you still have me!" she cheered him up. "I'll give you all of my attention."
"Really?" he innocently asked.
"Really," she assured him. She then proceeded to resume walking down the hallway and started another conversation with Kiyoto.
They soon stopped talking when they heard a loud cry coming out of a guest room. Kiyoto slightly groaned and informed Yuuki that the source of the cry was none other than his sister, Kiyomi. It turned out that Kiyoto and Kiyomi have just arrived earlier in the afternoon. Their parents had some affairs to deal with, so they had asked Michiru to take care of them.
"We should take a look," Yuuki suggested, advancing into the guest room. She observed the scene as the maids were all huddled around a white crib and trying to calm down the baby. "Kiyoto, how about you wait for me in the parlor?" She turned her head to the boy in her arms. "You can set up the chess board and I'll go play with you after I see your sister, okay?"
Yuuki then placed Kiyoto on the ground and beckoned a butler who was passing by to assist him. Kiyoto excitedly agreed and obediently followed the butler to the parlor.
"Is there something bothering Kiyomi?" Yuuki projected her voice as she entered the room.
All three of the maids abruptly turned around and bowed to show respect for the pureblood.
"My apologies, is the baby's crying disturbing you, Yuuki-sama?" one of the maids asked, head drooping.
"We don't know what is wrong, but Kiyomi would not stop crying," another maid chirped in. "Maybe your pureblood presence could soothe her?" It was common knowledge that even noble babies rarely cried in front of purebloods.
Yuuki slowly approached the crib and looked down at the frustrated Kiyomi. Then, for some peculiar reason, her hands reached for Kiyomi and picked her up. She cradled the cranky baby in her arms.
"There, there, Kiyomi. Don't cry, everything will be alright," Yuuki whispered to the baby.
At first, the baby didn't pay much attention to Yuuki until she looked into her alluring eyes. Magically, the wailing ceased and Kiyomi stared up at Yuuki as if she was mesmerized.
Meanwhile, Kaname was on his way to meet with some guests, but he stopped when he saw Yuuki cooing at the baby. A smile tugged on his lips as he watched the scenery of Yuuki playing with the baby.
The maids soon noticed Kaname and got the signal that they should give the couple some alone time with the baby. Perhaps the purebloods could bond with the help of a baby.
"Oh, Kiyomi, you will grow up into a gorgeous lady for sure. True to your name… pure beauty." Yuuki paced around the room and teased, "And many fine gentlemen will want your hand in marriage."
"Indeed, she will, but let's not forget that she will also be intelligent as her mother is an Aidou." Kaname added serenely.
Yuuki was not startled by Kaname's presence as he was always around her wherever she goes—or at least, that was what had happened for the last couple of days. She only casted a quick sideway glance at him before caressing Kiyomi's cheeks. "Beautiful and intelligent. That is a good combination."
"But, of course, she won't be as beautiful as you." Kaname said as he came up next to her.
Yuuki felt her cheeks warm as those words left his mouth. It has been a while since she had last heard something so flattering from him. "Would you like to hold her?" she switched the topic of their conversation.
Kaname held out his arms as Yuuki transferred the delicate baby from her hands to his. He had a funny warm feeling when Kiyomi looked up curiously at him. He then realized that it had been years since he last held a baby in his hands. The baby felt very light and fragile to him and it made him want to protect her.
The aura of awkwardness soon went away when the baby gurgled and gave a toothy smile at him. The baby then clapped her hands and made a cooing sound
"Isn't she lovely?" Yuuki patted her hand on Kiyomi's tummy.
He agreed by nodding his head as he saw how Kiyomi took hold of Yuuki's index finger with her small chubby hands and shook it a bit.
Yuuki let out an inward sigh and said, "I can't believe one day I'll become a mother…" Realizing that she had spoken her embarrassing thoughts aloud, she bit down hard on her lower lip.
"Yes, eventually we will become parents and have our own… little ones." His voice trailed off as he thought of their future together.
This time, her cheeks had turned a shade of light pink. She lowered her head as she did not want him to see her blush.
"How many children should we have?" he asked, out of the blue.
"What?" she asked, caught off guard. She couldn't believe what he had just asked her.
Seeing there was nothing wrong, he had repeated the question and added: "But no matter what, we need a boy and a girl."
"Why is that?"
"To continue the Kuran bloodline," he simply stated.
She crooked her head to one side and put her hands on her hips. She didn't like where this was going as he made it sound like the purpose of having children is to continue the bloodline rather than out of love. Kaname did not notice her change in expression as his attention was on the baby.
"Oh," she replied dryly.
"Since we are the only Kurans left,"
"Yes," she answered absentmindedly, forgetting that her atrocious uncle was still alive.
"And this is what our parents want,"
"Yes,"
"So, we have to fulfill our duties as purebloods."
Duties.
Yuuki couldn't help but wince at hearing that word. She was beginning to feel annoyed every time she was reminded of her duty. Ever since she had moved in with the Aidous, she had been regularly reminded that she had to carry out her duty as a pureblood. She knew what she had to do, but couldn't that wait? Were the nobles so scared that the only two Kurans in the world would die before they have an heir? After all, they did have eternity.
"I suppose so," she said bitterly, turning her heel. "Please excuse me, onii-sama. I'll be going now." She bowed her head to show respect for him. She then swiftly walked towards the exit of the room, leaving a slightly confused Kaname behind.
Kaname did not know exactly why there was a sudden change of behavior in Yuuki, but he suspected that he must have said something unpleasant to her. Never did he believe that he would say something offensive or displeasing to another person as he usually always so tactful when communicating with other people.
Sighing, he turned his head towards the baby and asked: "Did I say something wrong?"
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"Yuuki, I would like you to meet Madeleine and William Cavendish." Kaname introduced, gesturing his left hand at the two siblings before them.
Yuuki couldn't help but be nervous when she felt the Cavendish siblings' gaze on her. It was her first time interacting with other purebloods. She didn't like to be observed but told herself that she should get used to it as tons of people would look up to her once she had made her entrance into the society.
While trying to keep a calm composure, she quickly inspected the two siblings. The only physical characteristic that they both shared was their amethyst-colored eyes. Aside from that, William had blond hair whilst Madeleine had dark brown hair.
"It's a pleasure to meet you," Yuuki said, whilst sinking into a curtsy. "I'm so happy to finally be granted the privilege of having you come and stay here."
"No trouble at all. We are delighted."
The reply came from William and it astonished Yuuki that he replied so casually. He gave her a dashing smile that caused her to blush, so she lowered her head slightly. He then stepped forward towards her and held out his hand. Yuuki timidly glanced up at him in confusion. She did not know what he wanted. Did he want to shake her hand?
Foreseeing an uncomfortable situation if she does not response, Yuuki hesitantly held out her hand. Her eyes widened when he took her hand and pecked it. Naturally, she wanted to jerk away from him, but she stayed still as she remembered that was how the Europeans greeted one another.
"We should be the ones to feel honored as you have invited us. It's not every day that we purebloods have celebrations, especially for a pureblood who will be entering into our society," William said.
"We are also happy that there is another member of the Kuran family, particularly a young and charming lady," Madeleine joined the conversation.
"Yes, Kaname, how long were you intending to hide this precious treasure of yours from us? From the world?" William joked and caused everybody to laugh. "Now, may I steal her for a stroll in the garden?"
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"Unbelievable! You're telling me that you never heard of the famous musical The Phantom of the Opera? Why, it's a marvelous and classic musical. You ought to see it someday," William incredulously said. "They show this play at Her Majesty's Theatre!"
"I hope so too. Maybe onii-sama can take me someday." Yuuki said amicably
"So, how do you feel about him?" he curiously inquired.
"Feel about… who?" she asked, wanting him to be more specific.
"Your brother."
"Umm…" she paused for a while. "He's a caring and great person."
"Well, do you love him?"
"Huh?" Yuuki was frozen in her tracks by his query. She looked up at him and saw he had arched his eyebrow at her. She soon realized that her response at first was not proper and corrected herself. "I mean, pardon?"
William was amused at her reaction and repeated the question. He then added, "He is your fiancé; you will marry him someday."
"Ah, yes, that's true, but I'm afraid that he doesn't feel the same way as I do to him." Yuuki admitted, surprising herself that she half confessed her feelings for Kaname to a complete stranger whom she had met just a few hours ago, but it felt good to let it out.
"Oh?"
"Well, what I meant to say is that he only sees me as a sister and nothing more," she clarified.
"Hmm, intriguing. Is that what you perceive?" he asked, putting his hand under his chin. "Because I think he sees you more than that."
"How so?" she challenged him.
"The way that he gazes at you tells me so, and when I kissed your hand I noticed that he was staring at me the whole time as if he was very displeased and… possessive."
"Are you saying that onii-sama was jealous? Impossible," she said in disbelief.
"My lady, I assure you that he was. However, if you still have doubt, then I can help you," he said sincerely.
"Help me?" she was puzzled.
"I can prove that he thinks of you more than a sister." He turned his head towards the manor. "But of course, getting him jealous would mean that I'd have to act like I'm pursuing you."
"Oh, I see… well." She tried to think of a polite way of refusing the offer. Although it would be nice to see if Kaname was the jealous type, it might cause problems. "What about Madeleine?" she was relieved that she had found an excuse. "Aren't you with her?" She hoped that he would get the message.
This time, it was William who was hesitating for a response and caused Yuuki to wonder why.
"It's complicated between us," he finally answered. "We are in a similar situation like you two are—except, I'm the one who is in doubt that she loves me." He gazed longingly at the tree besides them.
"Oh, I'm sorry to hear that."
"That's why I want to help. Unlike my situation, I see that there's hope between you two. But, anyway, if you don't want me to help, I completely understand." He gave a reassuring smile to show he wouldn't be offended if she declined.
Listing the pros and cons of this plan in her mind, Yuuki pondered on whether to give it a try. She couldn't think of any harm of the plan as it might benefit both William and her. The worst scenario that she could come up with was that Kaname would find out and she would be extremely embarrassed and there could be another possibly horrible scenario in which—
Yuuki's thoughts dissolved when she peered into his eyes and found that he was truly sincere about this matter. Her instincts were telling her that she should give the plan a try and maybe, just maybe, she would be able to help this guy by proving that Madeleine cares about him.
"Alright," Yuuki smiled and clasped her hands together. "I accept your offer."
"Splendid!" he exclaimed, pulling a lilac rose out of nowhere and placed it in her hair. "Shall we go back, my lady?" He held out his hand and whispered, "He's spying on us now, up in that window."
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"I can take it from here," Yuuki said, taking the small bouquet of white roses away from her maid. "Thank you; please return back to your work."
Yuuki brought the roses close to her and took in the emanating sweet scent. She then hummed as she reached for an empty vase that was sitting on her table.
Unknowingly to her, someone was leaning against the frame of her doorway and watching her arrange the roses.
"There we go, all pretty," Yuuki said, placing both of her hands on her hips. She was about to leave the room but halted when she saw her brother staring at her.
"Onii-sama... is there something I can help you with?" she asked, trying to keep her voice tranquil.
"I was just passing by," he said as he approached her. "I see you're getting well with William."
"Yes, he's such a gentleman; very noble and refined," she told him honestly. She then grabbed a white rose from the vase and smiled. "It's hard not to like him." She twirled the rose with the tip of her thumb and index fingers. "What do you think of him?"
"He's a fine young man," he said, carefully choosing his words. Secretly in his mind, he was trying to find some flaws in William that he could indirectly mention to her, but he disposed of these thoughts as it would accuse him of being intolerant when she is with another man (which was true!). So, instead, he chose to remind her that William was taken. "Isn't Madeleine lucky then?"
"Yes, she is. I—ouch." She immediately looked down at her index finger. The rose had prickled her skin with its thorns and a tiny trace of blood oozed down unto the rose. "How clumsy…" she muttered to herself and brought her finger to her lips.
She was about to part her lips when he took her finger and licked the blood off.
The taste of her blood was so intoxicating that it caused his eyes to color a bright scarlet. His lust was overcoming him and he wanted to drink more. He was about to pin her against the wall and have a small drink from her neck, but looking into Yuuki's eyes, he saw the familiar fear and resisted the urge.
Kaname then straightened himself and gave his usual excuse for leaving, "I'm late for a meeting." With that, he left the room, leaving a flustered Yuuki standing there alone.
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Authoress' note: Well, that's the chapter! I hope you readers enjoyed it. Personally, I think it was kind of long and draggy-in terms of plot-wise, nothing major happened yet-so I'm going to start speeding things up in the next couple of chapters. As for the next update, it should be very soon-I can guarantee that it won't be next month, maybe next week-as I already got half of the next chapter done.
Comments and criticism are welcomed! It would be superb if I can get some feedback on how am I doing in this story because I'm getting a little worried that the main characters are going to be OOC very soon (if they haven't already)?
And last but not least, here's a treat to all you readers:
- Sneak Preview of Next Chapter -
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"No, I don't like William in that kind of way; I'm actually in love with someone else," she answered.
There was an absence of sound and speech as those words left her mouth.
"Who?" It took him a tremendous amount of effort to say that word. "Does he treat you well?" The images of a smiling Takuma and an embarrassed Hanabusa appeared in his head. "Does he love you?"
"He treats me well, he has always been kind to me…but I don't know if he loves me. I never know what goes through his head," she sighed, nervously playing with her hair.
"Oh… Do I know him then?"
"Yes. In fact, he's very close to you."
"I see."
"He's about your height too and around your age."
"Oh?" he tried to feign interested.
"But I think I'm such a fool to love him."
"And why is that?"
"Because, I'm helplessly in love with my brother."
