Disclaimer: I dun own anything except my own characters.

Sorry it's late. Bin doing stuff. I'm gonna go away for a few weeks soon, so i may or may not get the next chappie up before i go.

Ten minutes later, three Ravenclaw, Jason Fitzgerald, Dacendaren Clarva ("Call me Dace.") and Meredith Feyold, all Third-Years, and a pair of neutral Second-Year twin Slytherins, Morrigan and Lilith LeFay, who were on speaking terms with Lee Jordan, were forcibly volunteered by their year-mates as Recruiters and their first mission was to recruit the Weasely Twins and any other charismic Gryffindor or Hufflepuff they could get their hands on before the end of the day.

Chaosti had pulled out of the conversation and was studying his timetable as the older students, now grown to include up to Seventh Years and a few inquisitive Hufflepuffs from the other side of the Ravenclaw table and a single Gryffindor.

"What we got first?"

Chaosti frowned. "Potions with Hufflepuff." Blaise groaned.

Theo blinked at the three…well, two, because Lex was neither interested nor particularly cared what the conversation was about. "What's up?"

Chaosti glanced at his friend. "It means that the moron who came up with the timetables is suicidal. He put the Gryffindors and Slytherins together for the first two periods."

The potions professor passed by in time to hear this comment. He snorted.

A lot of the older students stared after the most humourless and unliked teacher in the school in disbelief.

First Period, Potions ith Hufflepuff

During the first ten minutes of Potions class, Chaosti had decided Snape was cool.

However, somewhere along the line, Chaosti's train of thought got derailed from his oh-so-important pondering of the squirrel's machinations due to circumastances totally beyond his control. When he realised this, he pondered how andwhy for a few moments to get his bearings.

Right. Okie dokey. Um. How did it happen? Er. Well, there's usually this train, and then this big rock comes along...

So what's up with Tums, anyway? They're for indigestion. They flavour them so that they won't taste bad, but instead of tasting good, it makes them just taste odd. Say, Tums. I wonder if the word "tummy" has anything to do with that? Take Tums For Your Tummy. I like that. It should be their slogan. Maybe it is. What is their slogan, anyway? And now for something completely differet! Um...Ok. Eyes! What would life be like with three eyes. Hey, Hiei! I love that guy. Hiei is my buddy. He's a psychopath. I'm sad that the Dark Tournament is over. Hey, they could make their own alphabet thing for small people. Alphabet-thing-making-people always use "horse" or something like that for H, but those crazy folks over at the Reikai office block could use Hiei! It is Reikai, right? Kind of like dust mites, except not. Actually, they-

"Yo." Something poked Chaosti, provoking a refined and manly response from the noble preteen.

"MOMMMYYY!"

"THAT'S ENOUGH, MR FROST! SIT DOWN! FIFTY POINTS FROM RAVENCLAW FOR DISTURBING THE CLASS!"

Chaosti blinked up at the seething face of Severus Snape, blanked his own and spat out the first plausible excuse that came to mind.

"But it wasn't my fault! I swear it was the invading squirrels again!"

Snape drew back, a stream of emotions oozed across his face starting with startled, then shifting to bemused, then disbelief and finally genuinely amused condescension. "That's the best you can come up with?"

Chaosti tried his best to look convincing. "But it's true! They used their Evil Furry Critter Mind Control™ on me! Seriously," The black-haired child had just developed an odd hypnotic fascination with the professor's rising left eyebrow. "If given half a chance, the cute furry cannibalistic rodents of the world-"And yes, Chaosti was aware of the other students staring at him like he'd grown another head (a fluffy fairy-floss pink one), and were edging away-"would unite and lay waste to human cities, devour babies, take control of all theme parks, pelt people's houses with nuts and steal everyone's left sock. (Insert vengeful shaking of fist) They are pure…evil…" The last word was a shuddering breathy whisper.

"So you're going to stick to this ridiculous and flimsy excuse?"

Chaosti innocently blinked his big poison green eyes up into the amused black ones of the potions professor. "What do you mean? It's true! They're really out to get me. I've known about it since I was mauled by a pack of rabid bunnies at five, and I became positive of it when the squirrels ganged up with the chipmunks in a conspiracy to pelt my Papa and I to death with assorted nuts and pebbles! You can even ask Papa about it."

"Very well, twenty points for sheer tenacity."

Chaosti blinked and cocked his head to the side as the usually snarky professor swept away to check a pair of Hufflepuffs' potion. The preteen turned his potions partner, predictably Lex, and blinked. "So what just happened?"

Lex blinked sleepily, with a nearly as sleepy smile. "You zoned out, I tried to get your attention before Snape got to us, and you freaked out. Ou also just lost us thirty points."

Chaosti pondered this before shrugging. "I'll probably end up famous by the end of the day for getting out of trouble with Snape. Do we have to add the whatever quills yet?"

Lex glanced at him because of the abrupt change in subject, idly tossing in some obscure slime, turning the bluinsh potion greenish. "Nah. Not yet, we have to wait for the…stuff…to turn purple, otherwise it will…do something not nice."

"Ah."

The two idly observed as a random Hufflepuff cauldron exploded, splattering the surrounding Hufflepuffs with dirty aqua goo and bringing the wrath of Snape down on the poor but totally deserving brats.

Too late, the unfortunate duo realised that Snape was bearing down on them. "You two dunderheads put the quills in before the potion turned purple, didn't you?"

A few moments later, Chaosti, and apparently Lex too, got fed up with the dweebs whimpering. Lex , losing his temper, leaned back and screamed at them, before Snape could. "For Circie's sake, shut the hell up! It's your own fault for not following the instructions, so quit being such weenies!"

"It's purple!"

Lex turned around and put the quills into the, and indeed it was, neon purple sludge.

"What are we making anyway?" Lex shrugged indifferently. Snape tried to ignore the two Ravenclaws at the back of the room, because, let's face it, they had gotten on his good side by displaying (while totally whacked out and unorthodox) Slytherin traits.

Besides, these two looked like fun.

Second Period, Transfiguration with Hufflepuff

Professor Minerva McGonagall, while staring with a semblance of sternness into the eyes of the two Ravenclaws, one 'innocent', the other indifferent, and decided then and there that she did not like these two. The smaller boy, Chaosti Frost, reminded her of all the worst aspects of James Potter and Sirius Black. He was wild, amoral and manipulative beyond what was unhealthy in even a politician. The only one who appeared to be able to keep the devil's spawn under control was Alexandrian Moon. Unfortunately, Alexandrian appeared to have absolutely no qualms about letting his friend run rough shod throughout the lesson. This one was indifferent, careless, bored and only willing to step in a little negligently when things got out of hand. Sure, they got their work done in record time, which would have made up for their eccentricities if only they hadn't turned her desk into a pretty indigo rhinoceros with a neon pink horn and electric yellow stripes, because messing with her desk was crossing the line.

"Detention tonight. Come to my office after dinner."

Third Period, Herbology with Gryffindor

CRASH! THUMP! PHOOMPF! Insert screams and mass scrambling for the door.

The newly dubbed Demolition Duo, blinked a few times in an effort to dislodge the soot in their eyelashes, so they understandably didn't notice Professor Sprout bearing down on them until it was too late.

"What were you two doing near the HIGHLY DANGEROUS Exploding Bomb Bush after I specifically told the class NOT TO GO NEAR THEM!"

Blink. "It was the invading squirrels again."

"Get out and stay out."

"But-"

"OUT!"

Dear Mama, Papa, Nuncle Naz and Aunty Doggy-Person,

I've made a few friends. You remember Blaise Zabani from Diagon Alley? He's in Slytherin with Theodore (Theo) Nott, who is also a friend. He's almost as nuts as I am. His cousin, Alexandrian (call him anything but Lex and he'll get brutal bloody vengeance on you) Moon, is in Ravenclaw with me. I think he's decided to be my keeper or something. He reminds me of you, Papa, and he says you've met.

Anyway, I've started the setting up of a school government. I'll probably be voted into power by mid-year to late next year. Then I can start an in-school civil war the likes of which hasn't ever been seen before. Only then shall my dreams of being a Dark Lord be realised. But then, I also dream of being a mortician, so...whichever comes first.

Two of the three teachers i had today hate me. I'm not sure why. I mean, the rhino didn't do THAT much damage while on rampage, and Exploding Bomb Bushes grow back, right?

Anyway, toodles.

Lotsa Luv,

Your Evil Little Ankle Biter.

P.S. I've been hearing lotsa gossip. Can you look further into the circumstances which led you to pick me up? Thanks.

Quote: Eagles may fly, but weasels do not get sucked into jet engines.