Let me explain something. The way I'm writing this story is based around the idea that the world they live in now will bring out the worst and the best of them, the weakest and the strongest. Right now Bella is hitting the weakest point of her life because of how she has felt unwanted lately. Their world has very few actual people left and it makes them desperate for any kind of connection with another person. Bella feels she has lost that because of her fight with Alice and how everyone sided with her. Every emotion is heightened because of their situation. And that includes Alice's anger and Bella's pain. I hope this cleared things up a bit. Having said that, let's get to it. Enjoy!

Disclaimer: SM owns twilight and all characters.

Ch. 10

Click.

My eyes snapped open in confusion. Realization washed over me as I released the magazine of the gun and saw that it was empty.

Oh God no, no, no!

Please, this can't be happening!

"NO!" I screamed into the quiet night and choked on my sobs.

I threw the clip to the ground below and roughly slammed the empty gun next to my leg.

"God, why didn't I think to check it? What is wrong with me?!" I brought my knees up to my chest, wrapped my arms around my legs, and rocked back in forth. I was ready, I was fucking ready!

I had tried to do this for weeks now, and every time I was too afraid. But not this time, this time I fucking did it! I pulled the trigger, and still, nothing. No relief, no peace.

"Why can't you just let me go?!" I screamed to the sky at the top of my lungs.

I buried my face in my knees and cried violently. I couldn't breath underneath the weight of the pain exploding in my chest.

"Bella?" My head snapped up at the sudden intruder and I turned only to be faced with the source of my grief. Alice.

APOV

I watched as Bella climbed out the window and down the ladder.

I dropped my eyes to my unfinished plate in guilt. I knew I was to blame for the lifeless look in her eyes that had become a permanent fixture since the night I had slapped her. I regretted it the second after it happened but my anger at her words dominated any guilt I might have felt. I could see the regret in her eyes as well but I was too blinded by rage to care. I knew that whole night was my fault, but to hear her say it so viciously, it cut me like a jagged knife.

She was right. It was my fault, and my actions did almost cost everyone their lives.

I've thought about that night so many times and I've wondered how things would be if I had just apologized and left it at that. I knew Bella would've forgiven me as would the others. I didn't know who I was more mad at, myself or Bella. And the confusion I was left with kept me from forgiving Bella as well as myself.

I had always been stubborn and it only got worse as the world around us kept getting shittier and shittier. It was because of this that I distanced myself from Bella. I longed to talk to her like we did before. To hold hands and cuddle against her warm, strong body. To be us. I've known for a very long time that my feelings towards Bella are anything but platonic. I had almost worked up the courage to tell her as we got to know each other better, holed up in that cellar.

I've never been attracted to women before, but I've also never really been smitten with guys either. I haven't even been kissed yet. But there was something about Bella that has made me feel things that I've never felt before. The butterflies I got when she would hold my hand. The tingles I felt when she would kiss my cheek or forehead. The absolute feeling of security I felt when she would hold me in her strong arms.

God, I miss Bella. Why couldn't I just get over myself and forgive her? She wasn't wrong, she just maybe took it too far and I was hung up on that. I saw her less and less these days and as Rosalie got closer to Em and I, the atmosphere when she was around became more tense. Rosalie felt she had to defend me because she was my friend and that's what friends do, but when I saw even Em distancing himself from her, I knew I had taken it too far. Bella doesn't deserve this.

I stood up abruptly, ignored the looks Rose and Em through my way, and walked to my room. I sat down on the bed and ran through all the thoughts in my head.

I miss Bella so much it hurts, and it just makes it worse that it's my own stubbornness keeping us apart. I know Bella feels something for me, even after all these weeks of silence, I can sometimes see it in her eyes when she thinks I'm not paying attention. But more importantly, before our fight, the way she would hold me, or kiss my cheek at random times, I knew she felt more than friendship towards me.

That's it!

I need to just get over myself and forgive her. I need her. I need Bella.

The sun had just set when I laid my head on my pillow.

My mind was made up.

Tomorrow when Bella gets back, I'm going to apologize and beg for her to forgive me. I just hope I'm not too late.

"NO!" A sudden ear curdling scream woke me. Panic ran through my bones as I recognized the voice.

I jumped up and put my shoes on and ran out of my room. Em and Rose had somehow managed to sleep through the noise. I was about to wake them but something moving caught my eye and I turned to look out the window.

I breathed a sigh of relief as I saw Bella perched up on the tree she had deemed the patrolling tower. I was so relieved to find that she was unharmed that I didn't notice the way her body shook. I stepped closer and felt my heart break as she opened her mouth and screamed again.

"Why can't you just let me go?!" Tears burned in my eyes as the pain in her voice pierced me. I have to go to her. I have to make this right.

I ran back to my room and grabbed my gun just in case. I rushed back to the open window and climbed down the ladder. There were a few zombies in the field but I knew I could run past them and make it to the tree.

As I got closer to the tree I could hear her sobs and vowed to myself that this woman would never cry because of me ever again.

I climbed quietly up the tree and placed my feel on the wooden boards.

"Bella?"

BPOV

I stood up and quickly whipped my face off.

"What are you doing here?" I looked at my feet as I spoke. Defensive and embarrassed.

"I woke up when I heard you scream and I was concerned." She sounded sincere but I scoffed at her and sat back down with my back towards her.

"Well I'm fine, clearly. Sorry for waking you." Please just leave. Please stay. Just go. I need you.

She didn't answer and I assumed she had gone but suddenly she was sitting next to me, her warm thigh pressed against my own.

"Bella." She took a deep breath and looked me in the eyes for the first time since that night. "I'm sorry. I'm sorry for being mad at you for no reason, I'm sorry for slapping you, I'm sorry for ignoring you, I'm sorry for pushing you away, I'm sorry for hurting you the way I have, I'm sorry for everything. I miss you so much, Bella. I'm miss talking to you, touching you, cuddling with you, and just being with you, Bella. I know I waited so fucking long to say all of this, and I'm sorry. I'm so sorry for everything." Tears welled in her eyes and spilled down her cheeks.

I looked into liquid, amber eyes and felt all the pain wash away leaving only relief and a longing to grab Alice. To hold her and never let her go again.

"I'm sorry for saying those things to you and screaming. It was wrong and I have never regretted anything more. Just please forgive me." Tears clouded my vision. Obscuring my view of her beautiful face. My eyes widened in shock as her warm, small hand cupped my cheek and pulled my face closer to hers. I immediately leaned into her touch and felt the gaping hole in my heart beginning to close.

"Only if you forgive me." She whispered and I breathed in deeply as her breath blew across my lips.

I didn't say anything, and I didn't wait for her approval.

I did the thing that I had wanted to do since I met her.

I crushed my lips to hers and moved them desperately against her mouth. I brought my hands to her hair and ran my fingers through the soft tresses. Alice didn't respond but she didn't push me away either, so I didn't stop, I couldn't stop.

A moment later Alice wrapped her arms tightly around my neck and kissed me back just as deeply. I couldn't help but moan softly when I felt her hand scratch my scalp. I opened my mouth and ran my tongue along her swollen bottom lip, dying to taste more of her. She gasped in surprise and I entered her warm mouth when her lips parted. Desire flooded through me as her soft tongue began to massage mine. We battled for dominance and I let her win. The kiss was getting more urgent and I knew we needed to stop soon before things went too far.

Alice suddenly pulled back and bit my lip roughly and grabbed my shoulders and pulled herself into my lap, straddling me.

Sweet fucking Jesus.

I gripped her hips and pulled her tightly against me as I kissed and licked the length of her neck. I kissed my way to the soft spot behind her ear and sucked the skin between my teeth, marking her. Her neck vibrated against my mouth as she moaned loudly. I smiled against her skin and kept going wanting to hear that beautiful noise come from her mouth again and again.

She pulled my face back to hers and attacked my mouth. With one hand on my chest and the other on my shoulder she pushed me back until I was lying down. I looked up at her through hooded eyes and saw lust burning in her eyes. Her hair was messy and tangled and her lips red and swollen. She moved her hands to the bottom of her shirt and started to lift it up.

I needed to stop her now or I never would.

I grabbed her hands and sat up.

"Alice we need to stop." I saw the hurt flash through her eyes and kicked myself for my poor choice of words.

She tried to stand up but I held her firmly around her waist.

"Alice I want to so badly okay? But I don't want our first time to be like this. It's uncomfortable and there's not a lot of room. I want you in my bed where I worship you for hours, the way you deserve." I cupped her face in my hands and kissed her lips softly. I pulled back and rested my forehead against hers.

"Okay?" She smiled and nodded against my head.

I stared into her eyes and wished that this moment would never end. For the firs time in so long I was happy. The pain that took rent in my heart for so long had vanished. My pixie had forgiven me.

"Bella does this mean that were like together now?" She looked at me shyly and I chuckled softly.

"I sure as hell hope so." She beamed at me and pulled my lips into a tender kiss.

"Me too." We laughed quietly together.

When we stopped I laid back down and pulled Alice with me, and hugged her to my body. Alice snuggled her head into my chest and sighed deeply.

"Thank you so much Bella for forgiving me."

"No, thank you."

I kissed the top of her head and looked up the stars above us.

Everything changed so fast, just a few moments ago I felt like I had nothing to live for and was ready to give, and now laying here with this angel on my chest, I thanked my lucky stars that that clip had been empty.

Because now I had everything to live for. I had Alice.

Yay! Everyone's happy again. I hope you guys enjoyed. Next chapter Bella and Emmett reconnect and the action starts back up again. Please leave reviews. Bye for now :)