Disclaimer: The Hunger Games and Catching Fire, two of the best books I've ever read, are owned by Suzanne Collins and I don't have any rights to them except the right to read them and love them. This is a companion fic to Firestarter.
Chapter Ten
Madge's POV
About half an hour later, we reached the end of the tunnel. It opened up into the landing area. Hovercrafts were busy landing and soldiers were disembarking from them. Workers were busy unloading supplies and weapons, or in some cases, loading supplies and weapons. However, once people started to notice us they stopped and a cheer went up. Vanzant stops and turns to us as she says, "I have to go and notify my superiors and the mayor. Kane will escort you all to the Justice building." Then she turns on her heel and jogs away from us. People call out to her and wave, but she doesn't stop.
So we follow Kane to the Justice Building. I can't help but smile as Peeta, Annie, Johanna, the Odair family, Cinna and Portia exclaim their wonder about the underground city. I know when I first saw it I was amazed. I'm still amazed that this District was able to build something so grand. Since we are all walking quickly, it doesn't take long for us to enter what I think of as the Justice Building. However, this isn't like the Justice Building at home. The outside may look similar, but the inside is a lot similar to a building full of offices and hallways. There are so many corridors but luckily they take us on a familiar path to the conference room.
I walk in right behind Peeta and Katniss. I'm surprised as I hear Peeta, mild mannered, gentle and kind Peeta, exclaim a curse. Next thing we all know, he lunges across the room towards Mayor Snow. Two guards pull him back and he strains against them. "Peeta, wait," Katniss calls out to him as she maneuvers into his line of vision. Her eyes go wide and I think I understand. I've never seen Peeta like this; not even in the Games. "Peeta, it's not President Snow, " she tells them.
Suddenly, the fight leaves him. "What?" he asks.
"It's not President Snow," she says again, though this time her voice is soft and full of understanding. "This is the Mayor of District 13. He's President Snow's brother." She rubs her hands over his tense shoulders and he moves his arms from the guards' grasp.
"My apologies," he says stiffly to the mayor.
"No, my dear boy," the Mayor says. "It's perfectly understandable given your condition. Welcome to District 13. I'm sure all of you would like to get some rest. These soldiers will lead you to your quarters." The Mayor sounds calm but everyone can see his hands shake. I know my hands would shake too if I had that much rage directed at me. I chance a look to Gale to see how he's taking it and I can tell he's just as surprised as I am. I don't think either one of us would have ever thought that Peeta would be able to hold such rage within.
The guards escort us out of the Justice Building. I see the crowd of District 12 survivors waiting for us and I no longer wait for Katniss and Peeta as I find my father. I have a need to hug him and reassure him that I'm okay. I haven't thought about how much my father must have been scared, especially if they had shared the news about our hovercraft being shot down. I see him and his relief is evident in his watery blue eyes. He hugs me close to him. I wrap my arms around him so tightly. "I'm glad you made it, baby girl," I hear him whisper. I feel him brush a kiss across my forehead and he leans back. His eyes take in my appearance and his relief fades away to amusement. "Have you been rolling around in the mud?"
I can't help the laughter that breaks free as I hug him again. "It's a long story. Do you know where we are staying?" I ask him. He nods and he takes my hand as we head over to a building behind him. He tells the soldier that was directed to lead me that he'll show me to my rooms. The soldier nods and leaves.
I look over across the crowd and I see so many people that I knew in District 12. I see Peeta embracing his father and the tears that are running down the both of their cheeks. One of Peeta's older brothers is with them. Katniss joins them and they talk quietly until they walk hand in hand towards the dormitory too. I look around some more and I see Gale as he's hugging his little sister. The sight causes a tickle under my heart and I have to look away and blink back tears. He has sweetness in him. It's just another thing for me to file away about him.
I look back and I can see him stiffen as he sees Katniss and Peeta disappear into the building. I can't help but sigh. Again, I feel a pang of pity for him at the thought of watching Katniss but at the same time I can't help that it would be good for him. He suddenly turns around and his eyes zero on my face. I feel a blush rise up on my cheeks at being caught staring at him. I look away and let my father lead me into the building. As we walk inside, I take in my surroundings. There's a comfortable common room on the right with sofas, chairs and a huge television. To the left is a large dining room and straight ahead are stairs. My father leads me up the stairs to the second floor and several doors down to the left. My door is the third door to the right. "My room is right next door if you need me," he tells me and I have this feeling he doesn't want me out of his sight for a moment.
"I love you, Daddy," I murmur quietly.
He hugs me tight to his chest and I feel his lips kiss my forehead again. "I love you too, my darling baby girl." His voice is so heavy with emotion that I almost don't hear him. It moves me to tears and I walk into my room before I start to sob. I feel so exhausted and dirty and I know the tears are only staying away because I will them too. If I let too many fall, a flood will start with no sign of stopping. "I'm right next door," I hear him say again as the door shuts softly behind me. I'm truly alone for the first time in days.
I barely give the room a glance as I find the door to the bathroom. It has the same type of shower from the Justice Building and I find some joy in it. I hurriedly strip off all the weapons, vest, and clothes. They stay in a heap on the floor. I turn the shower on with water so hot I can't even see it in the steam and stand under the spray. It feels as if layers upon layers of mud, dirt and grime are washed away. I wash my hair twice with some lavender smelling shampoo until I'm absolutely sure there is not one speck of dirt left. Then I attack my skin with soap of a similar scent. My nails are completely broken off. If there is a bit of nail left, it is caked with dirt underneath. I scrub myself with some sort of brush over and over again until I'm absolutely certain I'm clean. As I rinse, I lay my head against the side of the shower. I'm completely relaxed. It is then that I lower to my knees. I have so many emotions running through me that I can't even stand any longer.
I don't know how long I sit in the bottom of the shower, but the water never runs cold. It isn't long before I notice that I've been crying the whole time. I can't stop the flood of tears. I finally lay down on the tiles because I just can't hold myself up any longer. I just let the tears take over. There were so many close moments in the last few days. My mother's death, the destruction of home, the bombs, the hovercraft being shot down, the gun fight, the running from the Capitol Peacekeepers. I let it all go. I hear a knock on the door and I try valiantly to stop the sobs but I just can't. "Madge?" I hear someone call and I just can't stop. I can't even stop the sobs to answer.
I'm surprised when Hazelle Hawthorne opens the bathroom door. "Oh, sweet girl," I hear her say over the sobs. She turns the shower off and climbs into the shower stall not caring if she gets her clothes wet. She gathers me to her, and I'm not even ashamed of my nakedness. It feels so good to be held by another person. And not just any person, but a woman. I miss my mother so much it hurts. Not just because of her death, but even before her death I missed her. I missed her comforting me when I skinned my knee, or burnt my fingers. Hazelle just murmurs to me as she pets my hair. Soon, the tears dry out and I start to hiccup. I haven't cried like this since I was a child. She walks over to a cabinet that has big, fluffy towels inside. She wraps me up in one and then takes another out for my hair. She pats me down and dries me off and I allow her to. I probably shouldn't. She's got little ones to look out for, but I take this moment for myself. I close my eyes and remember a time my mother would do this for me when I was younger. I feel her take a comb through my hair and work out all the tangles. When she's finished, she gets me some clothes. I notice right away they are cotton pajamas. After I'm dressed, I feel her weave her fingers through my hair and braiding it back.
When we step out of the bathroom, I see both my father and a clean Gale waiting for us. A bright flush rises on my cheeks that Gale heard me but then I see my father's eyes so filled with pain. I start to cry again and he takes me in his arms and sits me on his lap on the edge of the bed. "I'm sorry, Daddy," I tell him softly. But he can't say anything either as he's shaking with his own sobs. I just hug him close to me until I feel he's cried it all out. I move from his lap and he gets up as he rests a hand on my cheek. Then he kisses me softly on the other cheek before he walks out the door.
Hazelle turns to leave with him but I stop her. "Thank you," I tell her. My voice is hoarse from the sobs but she's still able to hear me.
"You're more than welcome, dear. Anytime you need anything, just let me know." I see her eyes drift towards Gale meaningfully and then back to me. "Any pain I can help you get through is my thanks to you." I know her meaning but I can see that Gale doesn't. She doesn't explain as she leaves the room and Gale and I are left alone.
He moves his hand through his hair and blows out a breath as he looks back at me. "Do you have everything you need?" he asks. I want to laugh. Do I have everything I need? Absolutely not. I need to see my mother again. I need to tell her things. I need for Gale to look at me as if I'm not under some microscope. But all I do is silently shake my head. He comes over and pats my shoulder awkwardly. "Well, if you do, I'm right across the hall," he tells me.
I look up at him. "Why would you get me anything?" I don't know where the question comes from but I have the need to know. I want to know if he feels obligated.
He shrugs. "Because you're my friend."
I know I must look haggard. Even though I'm shiny clean, I'm sure that there are huge circles under my now swollen red eyes. My nose has to be red and runny from the crying. But I know my smile must light up twelve rooms. I never thought that Gale would say that about me. To know that I've earned that hard won honor in his book makes me feel good. "Thank you," I say again in a whisper.
I feel him pat my shoulder again. "Well, um, good night then," he says. He turns to walk out the door. At the last second, he stops and turns to look at me with those steady gray eyes. If anyone could ever be accused of having eyes that look for the soul, Gale would be convicted of it. He studies me so long that I start to feel my heart race. Our eyes stay locked for so long that I'm pretty sure time stops. Then he gives me a lopsided smile before walking out of the door and shutting it behind him.
My breath comes out in a whoosh as I hear the door across the hall open and close. So many close calls, I think. I close the blinds to the windows effectively shutting out the bright lights of the underground District 13. Then I climb under the covers of the twin size bed. As soon as my head hits the pillow, my eyes close and I drift off to sleep.
***
My mother, father, and I stare in horror as we watch the television screen go black. What did Katniss just do? We saw her burst into the clearing, screaming Peeta's name and finding the former Victor of District 3, Beetee. Then we see her hide from Enorbria. Finally, she steps back into the sight of the cameras and lifts an arrow tied with golden wire. It flew towards nothingness until it connected somehow with the force field of the arena. The lightning flashes and then the television went blank.
"What happened?" I ask my father and he shakes his head.
"I can't believe it," he says softly. I see his hand grip my mother's until his knuckles go white.
My mother coughs but I can tell she's trying to return the pressure with her fingers. "What happened to Katniss?" I ask.
"She destroyed the arena," my father murmurs.
I shake my head as I try to wrap my head around it. My father has been enclosed in his office for days but decided to come out tonight, of all nights, to watch the Games. I narrow my eyes. I've heard low murmurs in his office and I know it wasn't all the television. "Was it planned?"
His shocked eyes rise to mine. My mother starts coughing again, and we pause our conversation as I rise to get her some cough medicine. I go into the kitchen to pour her dose into a small cup. I look out the window. It's dark out, but I see shadows thundering across the street. "Dad!" I call out.
I hear his footsteps coming into the room. I just point to the window and he looks out. His face goes pale. "What is it?" I hear my mother ask weakly from behind us.
"I don't know," he says and he walks out the door. I follow him in a daze with my mother's cough medicine still in my hand. He's staring off into the distance. I turn my head and gasp. There's an orange haze coming from the mines. I recognize that look. I watched the Hob burn. People are running through the streets and screaming but I can't make out the words.
My father pushes past me on his way back into the house. When he comes back out, he's got his arm around my mother. She's still in her housecoat and slippers for God's sake. "Dad, what are you doing?" The lights in the house go dark all at once.
"We have to move," he tells me. He walks past me with my mother. She looks so frail in the bright moonlight. Her skin is so pale that it looks translucent and her long blond hair is fraying in it's braid.
"Dad, she can't go out in this. What's going on?" I ask and I feel fear in my stomach.
"We've got to get out of here. They're destroying the District," I hear him say as I follow him.
I look back and I can see bright lights in the sky. Bright, artificial lights that belong to hovercraft. Terror grips me totally and I start to run without looking where I step. We're close to the Justice Building when I twist my ankle and I go down. I cry out as my hands hit the earth. My father and my mother stop. My father picks me up and we start to run but my mother can't keep up. She's so frail and weak that she stops and falls onto the dirty street. Her white nightgown takes on the dirt and coal dust. Her blond braid falls over her shoulder as she tries to catch her breath. Then it hits me, as I see the hovercrafts bombing closer to us and buildings go up in smoke: my father can't carry the both of us.
"Take her," my mother tells him softly as he stops to help her up.
"Wha- No!" I cry out and struggle from my father's arms. "No, I can keep up, I promise." My voice is pleading.
Her blue eyes, so wide and pale in the moonlight are full with tears as she holds my hand. "You are the best of the both of us, Madge darling. You need to live and survive." Her breath is getting shorter and shorter as she's trying not to cry. "Get her out, Merrick," she pleads to my father. "Leave me."
"Darling," I hear him say gently as he kneels next to her. "Darling, I love you."
I stand there shaking my head violently back and forth as I put my weight on my good ankle. This can't be happening. Another bomb falls. "I love you too," I hear her say. Then she looks up at me. "I love you, Madge."
"No, Mom, no," I tell her and hug her tightly to me. "No, please, don't do this."
"Merrick," I hear her plead and I feel his arms around my waist pulling me up.
"No, Daddy, NO!" I scream as I start to fight him. My father is stronger than I ever thought. He throws me over his shoulder and starts to run. I beat my hands on his back and I look at my mother kneeling in the middle of the street. Other people are running and no one stops for her. "NOOO!" I scream out again. She just sits there in her housecoat and slippers and watches us leave her. Another bomb falls and I lose sight of my mother in a flash of bright light. My father and I fall forward as I scream, "MOMMY!!!!"
***
I wake up screaming. My door bursts open and I curl up into a ball. I feel a hand covered in calluses shake me but I don't respond. The only thing I know to say, I say over and over again. I know it as absolute truth. "It's my fault."
A/N: Please let me know what you think and leave a review.